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Re: bpd quirks

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>I notice on these posts that some characterisstics of one BP are not

the same in others. Like compulsive sex, bulemia, filth, drugs, silent

treatments. PB didnt have any of those. She was violently abusive and

>self mutilating which i dont see in all the other nadas.

this is true..there are different " types " of BPD...like my nada is the

witch/queen...there are other typrs..my sister is BPD but the waif, and

she's different than nada...and yet similar in ways too....ALL witches or

queens or waifs do not act exactly the same...they are eerily similar,

though.

Jackie

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Yes, you are right. I am sure this also contributes to the difficulty

in diagnosing BPD. If you only see/experience some of the symptoms,

it may be easy for a mental health professional to only use those

criteria in the diagnosis.

I had a hard time with some of the criteria when I was learning about

BPD and trying to determine if they applied to my nada. In her case,

I learned that sometimes her BPD actions are more subtle than I

imagined. Guess that is why a good therapist is good - they can see

those subtle behaviors as well as the obvious ones.

Sylvia

>

> I notice on these posts that some characterisstics of one BP are not

> the same in others. Like compulsive sex, bulemia, filth, drugs,

silent

> treatments. PB didnt have any of those. She was violently abusive

and

> self mutilating which i dont see in all the other nadas. Also a bit

to

> orderly around the house. Oddly enough her cursive handwritting was

> neat and beautifull just like caligraphy. She also loved to collect

> picture of everything and everyone. But she burmed them up one day

in a

> fit all of them some of relatives a hundred years old.

>

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My mom was self mutilating, I have noticed not many other people's

nadas share this behavior.

I think even though the characteristics of BPs are different, they are

the same extreme behaviors, just played out in different

characteristics. Does that make sense??? Like for some sex is dirty

and for others they are very promiscuous- different ends of the

spectrum, same extremes.

>

> I notice on these posts that some characterisstics of one BP are not

> the same in others. Like compulsive sex, bulemia, filth, drugs,

silent

> treatments. PB didnt have any of those. She was violently abusive and

> self mutilating which i dont see in all the other nadas. Also a bit

to

> orderly around the house. Oddly enough her cursive handwritting was

> neat and beautifull just like caligraphy. She also loved to collect

> picture of everything and everyone. But she burmed them up one day in

a

> fit all of them some of relatives a hundred years old.

>

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,

My nada is sort-of self-mutilating, but more Munchausen's. All my

life, she has been in-and-out of hospitals, more surgeries and meds

than I can even remember. I have thought for a long time that many

of these cases were self-inflicted. She has thrown herself down

stairs, ODed on medication, stopped eating, and who knows what else.

I got support for my theory from an ER doctor at the community

hospital who said (when we brought her in for withdrawl-related

seizures after she ODed on benzos) that her history was not a medical

history, but a psychiatric history, and that we would need to start

treating it that way. I really appreciated his trust in me and his

clarity and professionalism with her.

She is also EXTREMELY socially paranoid. Everyone is out to get her

or her family. Any time someone does something nice for her, she

makes it into something mean. My mother-in-law, who is one of the

kindest human beings I know, speaks to her very slowly and a bit

louder than normal because nada is very hard of hearing. Of course

nada thinks this is " condescending and insulting. What does she

think I am, retarded? "

It is very embarassing, but no longer my problem.

be good, all,

Maureen

> >

> > I notice on these posts that some characterisstics of one BP are

not

> > the same in others. Like compulsive sex, bulemia, filth, drugs,

> silent

> > treatments. PB didnt have any of those. She was violently abusive

and

> > self mutilating which i dont see in all the other nadas. Also a

bit

> to

> > orderly around the house. Oddly enough her cursive handwritting

was

> > neat and beautifull just like caligraphy. She also loved to

collect

> > picture of everything and everyone. But she burmed them up one

day in

> a

> > fit all of them some of relatives a hundred years old.

> >

>

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Maureen,

I think my mom had Munchausen's too, but I didn't realize it at the

time. Same drill as your mom- in and out of hospitals, tons of meds,

surgeries etc. I never knew what was a real illness with her and

what wasn't.

I think much of her illnesses were self inflicted, but she also was

self mutilating which was different than the illnesses. She did this

later in her life- cut up her arms, face, legs, burned herself,

picked her skin, punched herself until she was bruised. Some of this

she did to support her lies that people were assaulting her; some was

a pain release I think.

Also, she did get paranoid at times but not always. This was labeled

as BPD with schizoid tendencies. God, all the diagnoses...

I don't understand any of it, it's all so confusing!! All I know for

sure, is these are very sick sick people.

> > >

> > > I notice on these posts that some characterisstics of one BP

are

> not

> > > the same in others. Like compulsive sex, bulemia, filth, drugs,

> > silent

> > > treatments. PB didnt have any of those. She was violently

abusive

> and

> > > self mutilating which i dont see in all the other nadas. Also a

> bit

> > to

> > > orderly around the house. Oddly enough her cursive handwritting

> was

> > > neat and beautifull just like caligraphy. She also loved to

> collect

> > > picture of everything and everyone. But she burmed them up one

> day in

> > a

> > > fit all of them some of relatives a hundred years old.

> > >

> >

>

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Maureen,

I think my mom had Munchausen's too, but I didn't realize it at the

time. Same drill as your mom- in and out of hospitals, tons of meds,

surgeries etc. I never knew what was a real illness with her and

what wasn't.

I think much of her illnesses were self inflicted, but she also was

self mutilating which was different than the illnesses. She did this

later in her life- cut up her arms, face, legs, burned herself,

picked her skin, punched herself until she was bruised. Some of this

she did to support her lies that people were assaulting her; some was

a pain release I think.

Also, she did get paranoid at times but not always. This was labeled

as BPD with schizoid tendencies. God, all the diagnoses...

I don't understand any of it, it's all so confusing!! All I know for

sure, is these are very sick sick people.

> > >

> > > I notice on these posts that some characterisstics of one BP

are

> not

> > > the same in others. Like compulsive sex, bulemia, filth, drugs,

> > silent

> > > treatments. PB didnt have any of those. She was violently

abusive

> and

> > > self mutilating which i dont see in all the other nadas. Also a

> bit

> > to

> > > orderly around the house. Oddly enough her cursive handwritting

> was

> > > neat and beautifull just like caligraphy. She also loved to

> collect

> > > picture of everything and everyone. But she burmed them up one

> day in

> > a

> > > fit all of them some of relatives a hundred years old.

> > >

> >

>

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,

Thanks for the information, I never realized my mother was self-mutalating until

this post. My mother pulls her hair, beats her chest, and even has put bruises

on herself accusing me of doing it. She doesn't do the cutting or any of the

other stuff though. Thank God!!

Janie

mitchell_kristin wrote:

Maureen,

I think my mom had Munchausen's too, but I didn't realize it at the

time. Same drill as your mom- in and out of hospitals, tons of meds,

surgeries etc. I never knew what was a real illness with her and

what wasn't.

I think much of her illnesses were self inflicted, but she also was

self mutilating which was different than the illnesses. She did this

later in her life- cut up her arms, face, legs, burned herself,

picked her skin, punched herself until she was bruised. Some of this

she did to support her lies that people were assaulting her; some was

a pain release I think.

Also, she did get paranoid at times but not always. This was labeled

as BPD with schizoid tendencies. God, all the diagnoses...

I don't understand any of it, it's all so confusing!! All I know for

sure, is these are very sick sick people.

> > >

> > > I notice on these posts that some characterisstics of one BP

are

> not

> > > the same in others. Like compulsive sex, bulemia, filth, drugs,

> > silent

> > > treatments. PB didnt have any of those. She was violently

abusive

> and

> > > self mutilating which i dont see in all the other nadas. Also a

> bit

> > to

> > > orderly around the house. Oddly enough her cursive handwritting

> was

> > > neat and beautifull just like caligraphy. She also loved to

> collect

> > > picture of everything and everyone. But she burmed them up one

> day in

> > a

> > > fit all of them some of relatives a hundred years old.

> > >

> >

>

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Guest guest

,

Thanks for the information, I never realized my mother was self-mutalating until

this post. My mother pulls her hair, beats her chest, and even has put bruises

on herself accusing me of doing it. She doesn't do the cutting or any of the

other stuff though. Thank God!!

Janie

mitchell_kristin wrote:

Maureen,

I think my mom had Munchausen's too, but I didn't realize it at the

time. Same drill as your mom- in and out of hospitals, tons of meds,

surgeries etc. I never knew what was a real illness with her and

what wasn't.

I think much of her illnesses were self inflicted, but she also was

self mutilating which was different than the illnesses. She did this

later in her life- cut up her arms, face, legs, burned herself,

picked her skin, punched herself until she was bruised. Some of this

she did to support her lies that people were assaulting her; some was

a pain release I think.

Also, she did get paranoid at times but not always. This was labeled

as BPD with schizoid tendencies. God, all the diagnoses...

I don't understand any of it, it's all so confusing!! All I know for

sure, is these are very sick sick people.

> > >

> > > I notice on these posts that some characterisstics of one BP

are

> not

> > > the same in others. Like compulsive sex, bulemia, filth, drugs,

> > silent

> > > treatments. PB didnt have any of those. She was violently

abusive

> and

> > > self mutilating which i dont see in all the other nadas. Also a

> bit

> > to

> > > orderly around the house. Oddly enough her cursive handwritting

> was

> > > neat and beautifull just like caligraphy. She also loved to

> collect

> > > picture of everything and everyone. But she burmed them up one

> day in

> > a

> > > fit all of them some of relatives a hundred years old.

> > >

> >

>

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Janie,

The similarities are amazing, huh...

My mom even used to draw black eyes on herself with eyeliner to back

up her assault stories; it was funny in the summer when she did this

because her black eyes would smudge off. Even then she wouldn't admit

she was lying!! Talk about ridiculous...

> > > >

> > > > I notice on these posts that some characterisstics of one BP

> are

> > not

> > > > the same in others. Like compulsive sex, bulemia, filth,

drugs,

> > > silent

> > > > treatments. PB didnt have any of those. She was violently

> abusive

> > and

> > > > self mutilating which i dont see in all the other nadas. Also

a

> > bit

> > > to

> > > > orderly around the house. Oddly enough her cursive

handwritting

> > was

> > > > neat and beautifull just like caligraphy. She also loved to

> > collect

> > > > picture of everything and everyone. But she burmed them up

one

> > day in

> > > a

> > > > fit all of them some of relatives a hundred years old.

> > > >

> > >

> >

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

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Guest guest

Janie,

The similarities are amazing, huh...

My mom even used to draw black eyes on herself with eyeliner to back

up her assault stories; it was funny in the summer when she did this

because her black eyes would smudge off. Even then she wouldn't admit

she was lying!! Talk about ridiculous...

> > > >

> > > > I notice on these posts that some characterisstics of one BP

> are

> > not

> > > > the same in others. Like compulsive sex, bulemia, filth,

drugs,

> > > silent

> > > > treatments. PB didnt have any of those. She was violently

> abusive

> > and

> > > > self mutilating which i dont see in all the other nadas. Also

a

> > bit

> > > to

> > > > orderly around the house. Oddly enough her cursive

handwritting

> > was

> > > > neat and beautifull just like caligraphy. She also loved to

> > collect

> > > > picture of everything and everyone. But she burmed them up

one

> > day in

> > > a

> > > > fit all of them some of relatives a hundred years old.

> > > >

> > >

> >

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

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Guest guest

,

The similarities are amazing!!!!!!

Janie

mitchell_kristin wrote:

Janie,

The similarities are amazing, huh...

My mom even used to draw black eyes on herself with eyeliner to back

up her assault stories; it was funny in the summer when she did this

because her black eyes would smudge off. Even then she wouldn't admit

she was lying!! Talk about ridiculous...

> > > >

> > > > I notice on these posts that some characterisstics of one BP

> are

> > not

> > > > the same in others. Like compulsive sex, bulemia, filth,

drugs,

> > > silent

> > > > treatments. PB didnt have any of those. She was violently

> abusive

> > and

> > > > self mutilating which i dont see in all the other nadas. Also

a

> > bit

> > > to

> > > > orderly around the house. Oddly enough her cursive

handwritting

> > was

> > > > neat and beautifull just like caligraphy. She also loved to

> > collect

> > > > picture of everything and everyone. But she burmed them up

one

> > day in

> > > a

> > > > fit all of them some of relatives a hundred years old.

> > > >

> > >

> >

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

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Guest guest

wow. this totally brought up some old information for me. the

grandparents suspected something wrong with nada when she broke her

own arm at age 10 (by slamming a heavy door on her arm) and parading

around the whole neighborhood exclaiming " look what my dad did to me "

- when he had just gotten his first real job on the police force.

looking back, i think nada was a self-mutilator as well. she would

pull out her hair in rages, pick at herself (though she was on meth -

that's kind of a common thing to do) and she was hospitalized for a

while with paralysis - she claimed it was meningitis and that she got

it from a mosquito. but in retrospect, now that this topic was brought

up, the incident happened when all of her friends ditched her and her

boyfriend left. hmmmmm...

really good topic. and thanks for all the sharing guys, it really

helps to put some of her behavior in perspective.

lots of love,

christine.

> > > > >

> > > > > I notice on these posts that some characterisstics of one BP

> > are

> > > not

> > > > > the same in others. Like compulsive sex, bulemia, filth,

> drugs,

> > > > silent

> > > > > treatments. PB didnt have any of those. She was violently

> > abusive

> > > and

> > > > > self mutilating which i dont see in all the other nadas. Also

> a

> > > bit

> > > > to

> > > > > orderly around the house. Oddly enough her cursive

> handwritting

> > > was

> > > > > neat and beautifull just like caligraphy. She also loved to

> > > collect

> > > > > picture of everything and everyone. But she burmed them up

> one

> > > day in

> > > > a

> > > > > fit all of them some of relatives a hundred years old.

> > > > >

> > > >

> > >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

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Guest guest

wow the stories are chilling in similarity. My own nada would hit

herself and acuse me of hitting her, or she'd go bash herself on the

bricks outside and try to get ME to beleive dad was battering her.

Shed always scream at brada (my brother-her favourite) " Hit me " when

even hed get frustrated at her control tactics and physically try to

push her away. " Hit me in the BREAST! " ..once Dad caught Nada in the

kithcen pulling at bradas hair. Brada reached up to grab her hair and

she then begged him to pull her hair out please! Then Nada jsut

grabbed HANDFULLS of her own hair and jerked it out. That was the

only time in my whole life I ever saw dad put his foot down, he

grabed nada and pushed her into the back bedroom. They had some kind

of talk where she screamed alot then she was real happy and nice as

ever for about two days.

C

> > > > >

> > > > > I notice on these posts that some characterisstics of one

BP

> > are

> > > not

> > > > > the same in others. Like compulsive sex, bulemia, filth,

> drugs,

> > > > silent

> > > > > treatments. PB didnt have any of those. She was violently

> > abusive

> > > and

> > > > > self mutilating which i dont see in all the other nadas.

Also

> a

> > > bit

> > > > to

> > > > > orderly around the house. Oddly enough her cursive

> handwritting

> > > was

> > > > > neat and beautifull just like caligraphy. She also loved to

> > > collect

> > > > > picture of everything and everyone. But she burmed them up

> one

> > > day in

> > > > a

> > > > > fit all of them some of relatives a hundred years old.

> > > > >

> > > >

> > >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

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