Guest guest Posted October 3, 2011 Report Share Posted October 3, 2011 I am new here and like I have read from others on here, I am so relieved to know that I am not the only one. I have struggled with my hatred of sounds for as long as I can remember. I have gotten progressively worse of the years, with the last year being the worse. My triggers are food chewing, gum popping, gulping drinks, shoes dragging acroos the floor, flip flops, typing on a keyboard, even txting on a cell, finger tapping, bags crinkling and lately taking the cap off/on a pop bottle, I am sure this isnt all of them but I have too many to list. My question is how do you explain it to your families? I live with my husband, 12yr old daughter, and occasionally my 10yr old stepson. They try to be understanding but it is impossible to explain to them what it actually feels like how it fills me with fear, anger, rage, anixety they simply cant understand how a sound can do that. My husband and daughter are more used to it and are careful and we keep the tv loud enough to drown out alot of the triggers but even after four years my stepson is simply incapable of chewing with his mouth closed or picking his feet up when he walks. I try to ignore but I cant so I end up avoiding the situations so I dont yell at him but either way it is causing a divide that I dont want. Any suggestions? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 4, 2011 Report Share Posted October 4, 2011 If you figure it out please let me know. I know exactly where you are coming from my triggers are all of the mouth related ones (chewing swallowing slurping, gum smacking) it makes me want to scream and no one in my family understands. this is a relatively new problem for me, I'm only 16 and i used to think i was just stressed but its getting worse, i know its a real problem and at first i would just try to ignore it but then i would sit there and get angrier and angrier until i found a reason to snap at the chewer. I slowly told my family this was something that really bothers me but they didnt listen, sometimes now they do it intentionally putting as much food in their mouths as possible and chewing with their mouths wide open. my mom tells me to be normal and get over it. she doesnt understand that im trying but this isnt something to get over and im not being a drama queen, what can i do to make them see this isnt me being insane it is an actual problem they should take seriously > > I am new here and like I have read from others on here, I am so relieved to know that I am not the only one. I have struggled with my hatred of sounds for as long as I can remember. I have gotten progressively worse of the years, with the last year being the worse. My triggers are food chewing, gum popping, gulping drinks, shoes dragging acroos the floor, flip flops, typing on a keyboard, even txting on a cell, finger tapping, bags crinkling and lately taking the cap off/on a pop bottle, I am sure this isnt all of them but I have too many to list. > My question is how do you explain it to your families? I live with my husband, 12yr old daughter, and occasionally my 10yr old stepson. They try to be understanding but it is impossible to explain to them what it actually feels like how it fills me with fear, anger, rage, anixety they simply cant understand how a sound can do that. My husband and daughter are more used to it and are careful and we keep the tv loud enough to drown out alot of the triggers but even after four years my stepson is simply incapable of chewing with his mouth closed or picking his feet up when he walks. I try to ignore but I cant so I end up avoiding the situations so I dont yell at him but either way it is causing a divide that I dont want. Any suggestions? > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 5, 2011 Report Share Posted October 5, 2011 Have a extream nervous breakdown. That is what I do to convince my parents to homeschool me because people eat in class with their mouth open and people get sick. They haven't finished enrolling, but will soon. I also do it to get out of going to school when I am very edgey. I don't handle sounds good when I am mad or overwhelmed in the first place. Anyway, you should show them this group. > > > > I am new here and like I have read from others on here, I am so relieved to know that I am not the only one. I have struggled with my hatred of sounds for as long as I can remember. I have gotten progressively worse of the years, with the last year being the worse. My triggers are food chewing, gum popping, gulping drinks, shoes dragging acroos the floor, flip flops, typing on a keyboard, even txting on a cell, finger tapping, bags crinkling and lately taking the cap off/on a pop bottle, I am sure this isnt all of them but I have too many to list. > > My question is how do you explain it to your families? I live with my husband, 12yr old daughter, and occasionally my 10yr old stepson. They try to be understanding but it is impossible to explain to them what it actually feels like how it fills me with fear, anger, rage, anixety they simply cant understand how a sound can do that. My husband and daughter are more used to it and are careful and we keep the tv loud enough to drown out alot of the triggers but even after four years my stepson is simply incapable of chewing with his mouth closed or picking his feet up when he walks. I try to ignore but I cant so I end up avoiding the situations so I dont yell at him but either way it is causing a divide that I dont want. Any suggestions? > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 5, 2011 Report Share Posted October 5, 2011 My two cents . . . An extreme nervous breakdown may work to get familial assistance as a young person, but as an adult it is more likely to get you locked up for observation. What worked for me 12 years ago before I knew this had a name: The first thing I had to do with STEP KIDS is to protect myself. The boys were too young when I met them (11 & 13) and I knew they wouldn't understand so I made it no big deal. I just don't want to sit at the table to eat. Ever. And there will be nothing happening that I cannot get away from. Ever. Their dad was there and knew of my " issue " and it was nothing - it was no big deal. I could wander or sit on the countertop or leave the room. The younger one had a horrible habit of taking tiny sucking sips from a soda can and we offered him a glass or a straw and insisted that he stop doing that. Remember that some things are annoying to normal people and you are the adult and you are entitled to set boundaries. Footsteps are another issue and my heart goes out to you. Does he need new shoes? If he's just a sloppy walker maybe you could point out to him that he looks silly or something that will imply peer pressure: any young people who can help with this one? TEENAGE years suck anyway and to add this on top of it can be (is) horrible. I urge all of us to try to take control and do some detective work to find out who else in the family has misophonia. (Or maybe they are deceased now.) There is really strong evidence that this is genetic so try to find out who is the " crazy " relative. I realized my father's father had it just because my father was really mean (he had it bad) and his father was a violent person too. It may not always show up as a direct aversion to sound. You and the other people on this site have the ability of conscious insight and recognize that we are reacting to sounds, but believe it or not, some people (I see it in my brother) are just " mean " and they don't know why. My brother is angry a lot and I remember watching his reaction to sounds but he didn't realize it was sounds that were setting him off. You must get someone to be on your side and acknowledge that this is a medical condition. It's a physical reflex to repeated stimuli. They wouldn't expect you to just get over a broken leg and they can't insist that you just get over this. One of the audiologists on Dr. J's list can give you a diagnosis. Show your parents as much as you can: the NY Times article, The Today Show segment, any research you can find on the public portions of the websites. Then maybe offer to save them the money they would spend on diagnosing you and have them agree to treat this just like they would treat any other invisible illness (diabetes, autism, multiple sclerosis, bipolar disorder, etc etc etc). I am 52 years old and have had this since I was 8. There will be research and a cure soon - - everyone just needs to keep holding on and keep on being our own best advocates. I'm sorry this is so long - it actually turned into more like a dime. > > > > > > I am new here and like I have read from others on here, I am so relieved to know that I am not the only one. I have struggled with my hatred of sounds for as long as I can remember. I have gotten progressively worse of the years, with the last year being the worse. My triggers are food chewing, gum popping, gulping drinks, shoes dragging acroos the floor, flip flops, typing on a keyboard, even txting on a cell, finger tapping, bags crinkling and lately taking the cap off/on a pop bottle, I am sure this isnt all of them but I have too many to list. > > > My question is how do you explain it to your families? I live with my husband, 12yr old daughter, and occasionally my 10yr old stepson. They try to be understanding but it is impossible to explain to them what it actually feels like how it fills me with fear, anger, rage, anixety they simply cant understand how a sound can do that. My husband and daughter are more used to it and are careful and we keep the tv loud enough to drown out alot of the triggers but even after four years my stepson is simply incapable of chewing with his mouth closed or picking his feet up when he walks. I try to ignore but I cant so I end up avoiding the situations so I dont yell at him but either way it is causing a divide that I dont want. Any suggestions? > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 5, 2011 Report Share Posted October 5, 2011 I know that. I usually do it to get what I need. I had to, to be homeschooled. I would either do that or kill myself. I wish I could do all that myself. I know how to get what I need. I only do it to get what I NEED. I do ask for things that I want, but usually just leave the asking when told no. I usually do it to get doctors appointments like when I hurt my knee or got asthma from the flu. > > > > > > > > I am new here and like I have read from others on here, I am so relieved to know that I am not the only one. I have struggled with my hatred of sounds for as long as I can remember. I have gotten progressively worse of the years, with the last year being the worse. My triggers are food chewing, gum popping, gulping drinks, shoes dragging acroos the floor, flip flops, typing on a keyboard, even txting on a cell, finger tapping, bags crinkling and lately taking the cap off/on a pop bottle, I am sure this isnt all of them but I have too many to list. > > > > My question is how do you explain it to your families? I live with my husband, 12yr old daughter, and occasionally my 10yr old stepson. They try to be understanding but it is impossible to explain to them what it actually feels like how it fills me with fear, anger, rage, anixety they simply cant understand how a sound can do that. My husband and daughter are more used to it and are careful and we keep the tv loud enough to drown out alot of the triggers but even after four years my stepson is simply incapable of chewing with his mouth closed or picking his feet up when he walks. I try to ignore but I cant so I end up avoiding the situations so I dont yell at him but either way it is causing a divide that I dont want. Any suggestions? > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 5, 2011 Report Share Posted October 5, 2011 I hate to support a strategy like this because it's really an unfortunate path to have to take, but to be honest having a complete breakdown was the only thing that got my parents to listen. In my case, it was several times-- full on screaming, sobbing, near-hyperventilation, attempting to hurt myself. It was not fun. I don't wish it on anyone. But after a few absolutely miserable evenings, they were more willing to consider that I was dealing with a real problem, and that I wasn't the same as them; I couldn't just " get over it " the way they wanted me to. Again, I can't say I recommend this strategy. But it's the only thing that ever worked for me. > > > > > > I am new here and like I have read from others on here, I am so relieved to know that I am not the only one. I have struggled with my hatred of sounds for as long as I can remember. I have gotten progressively worse of the years, with the last year being the worse. My triggers are food chewing, gum popping, gulping drinks, shoes dragging acroos the floor, flip flops, typing on a keyboard, even txting on a cell, finger tapping, bags crinkling and lately taking the cap off/on a pop bottle, I am sure this isnt all of them but I have too many to list. > > > My question is how do you explain it to your families? I live with my husband, 12yr old daughter, and occasionally my 10yr old stepson. They try to be understanding but it is impossible to explain to them what it actually feels like how it fills me with fear, anger, rage, anixety they simply cant understand how a sound can do that. My husband and daughter are more used to it and are careful and we keep the tv loud enough to drown out alot of the triggers but even after four years my stepson is simply incapable of chewing with his mouth closed or picking his feet up when he walks. I try to ignore but I cant so I end up avoiding the situations so I dont yell at him but either way it is causing a divide that I dont want. Any suggestions? > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 5, 2011 Report Share Posted October 5, 2011 I have to say that sometimes I feel out of place in school and home. I would hurt muself, but don't do that. I don't know how many headaches I got from banging myhead against the wall hoping I would just pass out and time would go by or how mamy bruises I have gotten from hiting the wall or myself. I have even pulled a muscle from punching the hard chair. Hey, has anyone of you gotten so emotionly exuasted that the mind almost seems absent. I end being so exuasted in school during the after noon where most triggers are. I even can't cry as much as I want to. I feel like crying, but just too exuasted. > > > > > > > > I am new here and like I have read from others on here, I am so relieved to know that I am not the only one. I have struggled with my hatred of sounds for as long as I can remember. I have gotten progressively worse of the years, with the last year being the worse. My triggers are food chewing, gum popping, gulping drinks, shoes dragging acroos the floor, flip flops, typing on a keyboard, even txting on a cell, finger tapping, bags crinkling and lately taking the cap off/on a pop bottle, I am sure this isnt all of them but I have too many to list. > > > > My question is how do you explain it to your families? I live with my husband, 12yr old daughter, and occasionally my 10yr old stepson. They try to be understanding but it is impossible to explain to them what it actually feels like how it fills me with fear, anger, rage, anixety they simply cant understand how a sound can do that. My husband and daughter are more used to it and are careful and we keep the tv loud enough to drown out alot of the triggers but even after four years my stepson is simply incapable of chewing with his mouth closed or picking his feet up when he walks. I try to ignore but I cant so I end up avoiding the situations so I dont yell at him but either way it is causing a divide that I dont want. Any suggestions? > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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