Guest guest Posted February 21, 2012 Report Share Posted February 21, 2012 Hi everyone, I am new to this forum and have been avidly reading as many posts as I can. Wow, I relate on so many levels. I figured I should write something by way of introduction before I plunge in with various responses. I am a 44-year-old single mom who has suffered from misophonia/4S for much of my life. Like many, I have only fairly recently come to know that my private hell has a name. For most of my life I have felt various degrees of crazy, odd, neurotic--you name it. My problem centers on mouth noises--chewing, crunching, slurping, lip-smacking, gum cracking, etc. One crunch and I feel absolutely assaulted. Any of these noises trigger an instant overwhelming rage and fight or flight response. I feel an incredible urge to either punch the person in the face or to run away. Of course, I am too socially-correct to act on either impulse (thank goodness) but that leaves me in an absolute struggle to endure, suppress and cope. The condition is debilitating for me. I also struggle with anxiety, and find that my baseline level of anxiety at any given moment plays a huge role in exactly how intolerable the sounds are to me when they occur. If my anxiety level is high, it only takes a minor eating/mouth noise to send me into an internal tailspin. If I am feeling very relaxed, my struggle to endure the sounds is more manageable. This condition has had a negative impact on relationships in my life. I do my best to hide this problem from everyone except for those closest to me. Although everyone seems to do their best to be understanding, they really don't understand. I can see how this problem is very hard for others to coexist with. They start feeling very self-conscious of their own eating in my presence despite my every effort never to say anything to make them uncomfortable. I've always seen it as my problem to endure and feel guilty about impacting others. I have so many thoughts on this because it truly rules my life. I have become quite anti-social in a lot of respects in an attempt to control my environment. I recently broke up with a man who had been in my life for about a year and.a half. I have to say that my predominant reaction to the break up was one of relief. Besides the usual eating noises, this man had a habit of making lip-smacking noises when he got sleepy. I had resorted to wearing one earplug in whatever ear was closest to him as evening progressed. It's very sad that this has really interfered in so many relationships. My poor 8-year-old son has had to hear me say, " Eat nicely " or " Lips closed! " a million times. Anyway, my primary intent was to express how much I relate to you all and our common struggle. I am very happy to have found this group and look forward to participating actively. Thanks for being here! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 21, 2012 Report Share Posted February 21, 2012 just wanted to say hi lisa, and glad you spoke up.. you hit home to the tee with me.. iam a single dad 42 and am raising my 9 year old daughter on my own,. and yes it hearts the ol heart to have to tell her to blow her nose 1,000 times or to quit smacking your lips .. it sucks.. at dinner i make excuses to go eat in my room.. i try and hide it from her the best i can, but she is a smart cookie. (also she is begining to show signs herself. (nightmare) godbless Subject: I relate! New here.To: Soundsensitivity Date: Tuesday, February 21, 2012, 10:20 AM Hi everyone, I am new to this forum and have been avidly reading as many posts as I can. Wow, I relate on so many levels. I figured I should write something by way of introduction before I plunge in with various responses.I am a 44-year-old single mom who has suffered from misophonia/4S for much of my life. Like many, I have only fairly recently come to know that my private hell has a name. For most of my life I have felt various degrees of crazy, odd, neurotic--you name it. My problem centers on mouth noises--chewing, crunching, slurping, lip-smacking, gum cracking, etc. One crunch and I feel absolutely assaulted. Any of these noises trigger an instant overwhelming rage and fight or flight response. I feel an incredible urge to either punch the person in the face or to run away. Of course, I am too socially-correct to act on either impulse (thank goodness) but that leaves me in an absolute struggle to endure, suppress and cope. The condition is debilitating for me. I also struggle with anxiety, and find that my baseline level of anxiety at any given moment plays a huge role in exactly how intolerable the sounds are to me when they occur. If my anxiety level is high, it only takes a minor eating/mouth noise to send me into an internal tailspin. If I am feeling very relaxed, my struggle to endure the sounds is more manageable. This condition has had a negative impact on relationships in my life. I do my best to hide this problem from everyone except for those closest to me. Although everyone seems to do their best to be understanding, they really don't understand. I can see how this problem is very hard for others to coexist with. They start feeling very self-conscious of their own eating in my presence despite my every effort never to say anything to make them uncomfortable. I've always seen it as my problem to endure and feel guilty about impacting others. I have so many thoughts on this because it truly rules my life. I have become quite anti-social in a lot of respects in an attempt to control my environment. I recently broke up with a man who had been in my life for about a year and.a half. I have to say that my predominant reaction to the break up was one of relief. Besides the usual eating noises, this man had a habit of making lip-smacking noises when he got sleepy. I had resorted to wearing one earplug in whatever ear was closest to him as evening progressed. It's very sad that this has really interfered in so many relationships. My poor 8-year-old son has had to hear me say, "Eat nicely" or "Lips closed!" a million times.Anyway, my primary intent was to express how much I relate to you all and our common struggle. I am very happy to have found this group and look forward to participating actively. Thanks for being here! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 23, 2012 Report Share Posted February 23, 2012 Hi , Thanks for your response! It is heartbreaking. My son is definitely impacted by my struggle. Recently he has been saying how much he likes it when I eat dinner with him. If I can get away with it, I normally feed him separately--it is just too torturous for me to sit with him. I feel so guilty that I've done such a dismal job of providing him with the simple experience of a regular family dinner. I try to force myself to do it about half of the nights of the week, but honestly, it's kinda counter-productive because I get so agitated and it's hard to come back down from that state. I have talked with my son about my misophonia. I describe it as a problem that I struggle with and say that I'm sorry that he is affected by it. However, I try not to dwell on it. I have no idea if he has a predisposition to end up with misophonia and I don't know if drawing his attention to the unpleasantness of eating noises will have some sort of power of suggestion. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy, let alone the dearest person in the world to me. Anyway, thanks for commiserating! I wish no one else had to experience this struggle, but it is also good to know that I am not alone. > > > > Subject: I relate! New here. > To: Soundsensitivity > Date: Tuesday, February 21, 2012, 10:20 AM > > > > Â > > > > Hi everyone, > > I am new to this forum and have been avidly reading as many posts as I can. Wow, I relate on so many levels. I figured I should write something by way of introduction before I plunge in with various responses. > > I am a 44-year-old single mom who has suffered from misophonia/4S for much of my life. Like many, I have only fairly recently come to know that my private hell has a name. For most of my life I have felt various degrees of crazy, odd, neurotic--you name it. My problem centers on mouth noises--chewing, crunching, slurping, lip-smacking, gum cracking, etc. One crunch and I feel absolutely assaulted. Any of these noises trigger an instant overwhelming rage and fight or flight response. I feel an incredible urge to either punch the person in the face or to run away. Of course, I am too socially-correct to act on either impulse (thank goodness) but that leaves me in an absolute struggle to endure, suppress and cope. The condition is debilitating for me. > > I also struggle with anxiety, and find that my baseline level of anxiety at any given moment plays a huge role in exactly how intolerable the sounds are to me when they occur. If my anxiety level is high, it only takes a minor eating/mouth noise to send me into an internal tailspin. If I am feeling very relaxed, my struggle to endure the sounds is more manageable. > > This condition has had a negative impact on relationships in my life. I do my best to hide this problem from everyone except for those closest to me. Although everyone seems to do their best to be understanding, they really don't understand. I can see how this problem is very hard for others to coexist with. They start feeling very self-conscious of their own eating in my presence despite my every effort never to say anything to make them uncomfortable. I've always seen it as my problem to endure and feel guilty about impacting others. > > I have so many thoughts on this because it truly rules my life. I have become quite anti-social in a lot of respects in an attempt to control my environment. I recently broke up with a man who had been in my life for about a year and.a half. I have to say that my predominant reaction to the break up was one of relief. Besides the usual eating noises, this man had a habit of making lip-smacking noises when he got sleepy. I had resorted to wearing one earplug in whatever ear was closest to him as evening progressed. It's very sad that this has really interfered in so many relationships. My poor 8-year-old son has had to hear me say, " Eat nicely " or " Lips closed! " a million times. > > Anyway, my primary intent was to express how much I relate to you all and our common struggle. I am very happy to have found this group and look forward to participating actively. Thanks for being here! > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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