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Really like reading that, especially the line about cleaning our plate and saying thank you. As for the hero... I have often thought the same, like I am more heroine-like now than some years ago. But lately I actually feel the opposite, I feel more ordinary and human than ever before. I also have been saying no for a long time. Now I am learning to say yes, it feels like I am more my true nature. I don't think I am more fantastical or heroine-like, but I do feel a bit more me. Thank you again, truly loved your text. Tread gently XXX, ______________________Signature: Mrs Em Equanimity This is my

personal blog where I record my experience applying Acceptance Commitment Therapy to my anxiety and agoraphobia in particular, and my life in general. Feel free to browse. http://eyeofthehurricane-act.blogspot.com/--- El sáb, 4/6/11, escribió:De: Asunto: In Appreciation of Crashing, Bliss Following, Hero's Journeying, and PracticePara: ACT_for_the_Public Fecha: sábado, 4 de junio, 2011 15:30

Here is a little appreciation I just posted on facebook. http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=10150622652525790I hope there is some use in it for my fellow travelers on the list.My experience with crashing....Well,

it does not look like it looked in 1985. Then it was a really gory train wreck and would last for months and months...and longer, sometimes years. Let me give you an example from about 1981. I was unemployed. I did not work much before my 30th birthday, mostly off the grid, so unemployment was my usual occupation. But this was a time when I actually had a little job working at a community center. I actually liked that little job, though I drank at lunch as was typical for me in those days. Reagan got elected and the community center all but closed down with the immediate round of budget cuts. With the cuts, I was the first to go. My baseline was dysfunctional in the extreme, but I had been doing well, for me. Anyhow, I got into this funk. My wife was working a couple jobs to keep us afloat. Some days when I was home alone, I would literally crawl into the closet and sit at the back of it with the door closed. I recall a day when my little brother came over. I was laying on the couch watching TV with a case of beer setting beside the couch. He came in and sat down and said “What are you watching?†I had no particular idea. I had just turned it on, but not bothered to figure out what was on. Just laying there staring at whatever was on that channel.

“Why are you watching this?â€â€”I shrug. I asked Dave if he wants a beer. He says “Sure†and I reached into the box by the couch and handed him one. He looks at me and says "This is warm!"—I shrug. It just did not matter. Nothing mattered. Just laying there, smoking weed, drinking beer, counting the days, waiting for the end, but fearful it would just go on and on and on. I have not got that funky in years. But do I still have down times? Yep. Sometimes they stretch out a bit—maybe even weeks. But the funkiness is different—more permeable to things going on around me. I don't stop moving, and, even when in a funk, there are times when I get engaged in things I care about and liven up. Richness can permeate—at least some. The lows and

stuck spots are somehow more flexible. There are some ups mixed in with the downs. Before it was dead flat...life was a dull draining monotone. No variation and nothing leaked in. The lows are less sticky—everything that happens does not seem to get folded into the funk. And they never seem to have the duration they used to have—though some still long. Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would clean my plate and say thank

you. So if what was on my plate was depression....OK. If it was???.......OK. Not entirely coincidentally, the last drink or drug I had (except medical) was the last day in May 1985. Drinking and getting high were my major strategies for saying “No†to what life put on my plate (definitely not my only strategies, but major strategies). So the start was acceptance. And movement. I got up each day and to the best of my ability I did the next right thing. I went to work. I paid my bills. I paid my child support. I tried to do what a citizen

would do—all new stuff for me. Gradually my activity increased, first work, then school, work, more school, more school, more school, and, life spread out before me. Engagement in life increased—broadened and deepened. I learned a little at a time to let go of what my head had to say to me about myself, my future, my possibilities, and the same for others. Instead, I started using my values as a guide, not my thoughts. I was watching a ph series called The Power of Myth ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Power_of_Myth ) on Public TV and was saying "follow your bliss." And, he very clearly did not mean hedonism. I spent a long, long time, and still do, inside questions generated watching that show. What would it mean for me to follow my bliss? What would my life look like, over time, if I were to do that? What would I do in the next day, morning, moment, that act would move me in that direction (even ever so slightly)? Will my next act move me in the direction of my values? Or away? If away, can I just let that go for another day? also talked at length about the hero’s journey. What might my own “hero’s journey†look like? What if I let myself dare to have what called a “hero’s journey?†(Even now, I shake a little with fear that it might sound pompous, presumptuous to call my own journey a hero’s journey, or to even imagine one.) Why has this changed over the years? 1. I have practiced coming back to this moment, right now. Heaven knows I have had a lot of opportunities to practice having strayed from it so often (present moment).2. I have practiced staying more open to what I feel and think (acceptance) without attachment (defusion).3. I have practiced being in a continual process of authoring the direction my life is taking (values), and practiced letting go of rigid attachment to particular outcomes (defusion and acceptance).4. I have practice doing the next right thing (values and committed action).5. I have practiced noticing (self-as-context) that this practice has opened up possibilities that I would never in a million years been able to dream of prior to that choice, June 1, 1985. And, I have failed and I mean failed hard, hard, a lot, a lot, over the years, AND like the freakin' energizer bunny, I keep coming back to the practice. Sometimes sooner, sometimes later, but so far, I have come back one more time than I have gone away and this morning, this very morning, this very moment, I am declaring that practice to be enough...without justification, without consultation, without approval (including my own). I declare this practice to be enough. I expect my practice to change over

time. How? Can't say? Will it change? I would bet on that. But for this day....I am declaring International Enough Day. Here and now is enough. This practice, cracked and a bit leaky, is enough. I invite you all to imagine your own personal hero’s journey. I invite you to leave the end of the journey open to possibility. I invite you to let the tiniest act, this day, this morning, this moment, to be enough. my warm and good wishes to all in their practice—time for this one to head off to yoga,

G. 205 Peabody BuildingPsychology DepartmentUniversity of MississippiOxford, MS 38677ph: fax: academic homepage:www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htmalso check outwww.onelifellc.comwww.mindfulnessfortwo.comwww.facebook.com/kellygwilsonwww.tastybehaviorism.comwww.abnormalwootwoot.com

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Mrs Em - I really don't think means hero in the puffed up sense. The hero's journey is intended as a metaphor for each person's willingness to take their own journey. At least that is my take on it.best

G. 205 Peabody BuildingPsychology DepartmentUniversity of MississippiOxford, MS 38677ph: fax: academic homepage:www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htmalso check outwww.onelifellc.comwww.mindfulnessfortwo.comwww.facebook.com/kellygwilsonwww.tastybehaviorism.comwww.abnormalwootwoot.com

Really like reading that, especially the line about cleaning our plate and saying thank you. As for the hero... I have often thought the same, like I am more heroine-like now than some years ago. But lately I actually feel the opposite, I feel more ordinary and human than ever before. I also have been saying no for a long time. Now I am learning to say yes, it feels like I am more my true nature. I don't think I am more fantastical or heroine-like, but I do feel a bit more me. Thank you again, truly loved your text. Tread gently XXX, ______________________Signature: Mrs Em Equanimity This is my

personal blog where I record my experience applying Acceptance Commitment Therapy to my anxiety and agoraphobia in particular, and my life in general. Feel free to browse. http://eyeofthehurricane-act.blogspot.com/--- El sáb, 4/6/11, escribió:De: Asunto: In Appreciation of Crashing, Bliss Following, Hero's Journeying, and PracticePara: ACT_for_the_Public Fecha: sábado, 4 de junio, 2011 15:30

Here is a little appreciation I just posted on facebook. http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=10150622652525790I hope there is some use in it for my fellow travelers on the list.My experience with crashing....Well,

it does not look like it looked in 1985. Then it was a really gory train wreck and would last for months and months...and longer, sometimes years. Let me give you an example from about 1981. I was unemployed. I did not work much before my 30th birthday, mostly off the grid, so unemployment was my usual occupation. But this was a time when I actually had a little job working at a community center. I actually liked that little job, though I drank at lunch as was typical for me in those days. Reagan got elected and the community center all but closed down with the immediate round of budget cuts. With the cuts, I was the first to go. My baseline was dysfunctional in the extreme, but I had been doing well, for me. Anyhow, I got into this funk. My wife was working a couple jobs to keep us afloat. Some days when I was home alone, I would literally crawl into the closet and sit at the back of it with the door closed. I recall a day when my little brother came over. I was laying on the couch watching TV with a case of beer setting beside the couch. He came in and sat down and said “What are you watching?” I had no particular idea. I had just turned it on, but not bothered to figure out what was on. Just laying there staring at whatever was on that channel.

“Why are you watching this?”—I shrug. I asked Dave if he wants a beer. He says “Sure” and I reached into the box by the couch and handed him one. He looks at me and says "This is warm!"—I shrug. It just did not matter. Nothing mattered. Just laying there, smoking weed, drinking beer, counting the days, waiting for the end, but fearful it would just go on and on and on. I have not got that funky in years. But do I still have down times? Yep. Sometimes they stretch out a bit—maybe even weeks. But the funkiness is different—more permeable to things going on around me. I don't stop moving, and, even when in a funk, there are times when I get engaged in things I care about and liven up. Richness can permeate—at least some. The lows and

stuck spots are somehow more flexible. There are some ups mixed in with the downs. Before it was dead flat...life was a dull draining monotone. No variation and nothing leaked in. The lows are less sticky—everything that happens does not seem to get folded into the funk. And they never seem to have the duration they used to have—though some still long. Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would clean my plate and say thank

you. So if what was on my plate was depression....OK. If it was???.......OK. Not entirely coincidentally, the last drink or drug I had (except medical) was the last day in May 1985. Drinking and getting high were my major strategies for saying “No” to what life put on my plate (definitely not my only strategies, but major strategies). So the start was acceptance. And movement. I got up each day and to the best of my ability I did the next right thing. I went to work. I paid my bills. I paid my child support. I tried to do what a citizen

would do—all new stuff for me. Gradually my activity increased, first work, then school, work, more school, more school, more school, and, life spread out before me. Engagement in life increased—broadened and deepened. I learned a little at a time to let go of what my head had to say to me about myself, my future, my possibilities, and the same for others. Instead, I started using my values as a guide, not my thoughts. I was watching a ph series called The Power of Myth ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Power_of_Myth ) on Public TV and was saying "follow your bliss." And, he very clearly did not mean hedonism. I spent a long, long time, and still do, inside questions generated watching that show. What would it mean for me to follow my bliss? What would my life look like, over time, if I were to do that? What would I do in the next day, morning, moment, that act would move me in that direction (even ever so slightly)? Will my next act move me in the direction of my values? Or away? If away, can I just let that go for another day? also talked at length about the hero’s journey. What might my own “hero’s journey” look like? What if I let myself dare to have what called a “hero’s journey?” (Even now, I shake a little with fear that it might sound pompous, presumptuous to call my own journey a hero’s journey, or to even imagine one.) Why has this changed over the years? 1. I have practiced coming back to this moment, right now. Heaven knows I have had a lot of opportunities to practice having strayed from it so often (present moment).2. I have practiced staying more open to what I feel and think (acceptance) without attachment (defusion).3. I have practiced being in a continual process of authoring the direction my life is taking (values), and practiced letting go of rigid attachment to particular outcomes (defusion and acceptance).4. I have practice doing the next right thing (values and committed action).5. I have practiced noticing (self-as-context) that this practice has opened up possibilities that I would never in a million years been able to dream of prior to that choice, June 1, 1985. And, I have failed and I mean failed hard, hard, a lot, a lot, over the years, AND like the freakin' energizer bunny, I keep coming back to the practice. Sometimes sooner, sometimes later, but so far, I have come back one more time than I have gone away and this morning, this very morning, this very moment, I am declaring that practice to be enough...without justification, without consultation, without approval (including my own). I declare this practice to be enough. I expect my practice to change over

time. How? Can't say? Will it change? I would bet on that. But for this day....I am declaring International Enough Day. Here and now is enough. This practice, cracked and a bit leaky, is enough. I invite you all to imagine your own personal hero’s journey. I invite you to leave the end of the journey open to possibility. I invite you to let the tiniest act, this day, this morning, this moment, to be enough. my warm and good wishes to all in their practice—time for this one to head off to yoga,

G. 205 Peabody BuildingPsychology DepartmentUniversity of MississippiOxford, MS 38677ph: fax: academic homepage:www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htmalso check outwww.onelifellc.comwww.mindfulnessfortwo.comwww.facebook.com/kellygwilsonwww.tastybehaviorism.comwww.abnormalwootwoot.com

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I don't think I do either, the puffed up bit (I think I know what you mean by that). What happened to me was that before I associated being willing with a super-human quality, so when I was first willing, I felt like I could feel my cape blowing behind me in the wind. Now, being willing seems more human than super-human. Its the same thing though, just a change of perception, its all about what you say: the journey of being willing, and picking ourselves up each time we fall. Tread gently XXX______________________Signature: Mrs Em Equanimity This is my personal blog where I record my experience applying

Acceptance Commitment Therapy to my anxiety and agoraphobia in particular, and my life in general. Feel free to browse. http://eyeofthehurricane-act.blogspot.com/--- El sáb, 4/6/11, escribió:De: Asunto: Re: In Appreciation of Crashing, Bliss Following, Hero's Journeying, and PracticePara: ACT_for_the_Public Fecha: sábado, 4 de junio, 2011 19:28

Mrs Em - I really don't think means hero in the puffed up sense. The hero's journey is intended as a metaphor for each person's willingness to take their own journey. At least that is my take on it.best

G. 205 Peabody BuildingPsychology DepartmentUniversity of MississippiOxford, MS 38677ph: fax: academic homepage:www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htmalso check outwww.onelifellc.comwww.mindfulnessfortwo.comwww.facebook.com/kellygwilsonwww.tastybehaviorism.comwww.abnormalwootwoot.com

Really like reading that, especially the line about cleaning our plate and saying thank you. As for the hero... I have often thought the same, like I am more heroine-like now than some years ago. But lately I actually feel the opposite, I feel more ordinary and human than ever before. I also have been saying no for a long time. Now I am learning to say yes, it feels like I am more my true nature. I don't think I am more fantastical or heroine-like, but I do feel a bit more me. Thank you again, truly loved your text. Tread gently XXX, ______________________Signature: Mrs Em

Equanimity This is my

personal blog where I record my experience applying Acceptance Commitment Therapy to my anxiety and agoraphobia in particular, and my life in general. Feel free to browse. http://eyeofthehurricane-act.blogspot.com/--- El sáb, 4/6/11, escribió:De: Asunto: In Appreciation of Crashing, Bliss Following, Hero's Journeying, and PracticePara: ACT_for_the_Public Fecha: sábado, 4 de junio, 2011 15:30

Here is a little appreciation I just posted on facebook. http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=10150622652525790I hope there is some use in it for my fellow travelers on the list.My experience with crashing....Well,

it does not look like it looked in 1985. Then it was a really gory train wreck and would last for months and months...and longer, sometimes years. Let me give you an example from about 1981. I was unemployed. I did not work much before my 30th birthday, mostly off the grid, so unemployment was my usual occupation. But this was a time when I actually had a little job working at a community center. I actually liked that little job, though I drank at lunch as was typical for me in those days. Reagan got elected and the community center all but closed down with the immediate round of budget cuts. With the cuts, I was the first to go. My baseline was dysfunctional in the extreme, but I had been doing well, for me. Anyhow, I got into this funk. My wife was working a couple jobs to keep us afloat. Some days when I was home alone, I would literally crawl into the closet and sit at the back of it with the door closed. I recall a day when my little brother came over. I was laying on the couch watching TV with a case of beer setting beside the couch. He came in and sat down and said “What are you watching?†I had no particular idea. I had just turned it on, but not bothered to figure out what was on. Just laying there staring at whatever was on that channel.

“Why are you watching this?â€â€”I shrug. I asked Dave if he wants a beer. He says “Sure†and I reached into the box by the couch and handed him one. He looks at me and says "This is warm!"—I shrug. It just did not matter. Nothing mattered. Just laying there, smoking weed, drinking beer, counting the days, waiting for the end, but fearful it would just go on and on and on. I have not got that funky in years. But do I still have down times? Yep. Sometimes they stretch out a bit—maybe even weeks. But the funkiness is different—more permeable to things going on around me. I don't stop moving, and, even when in a funk, there are times when I get engaged in things I care about and liven up. Richness can permeate—at least some. The lows and

stuck spots are somehow more flexible. There are some ups mixed in with the downs. Before it was dead flat...life was a dull draining monotone. No variation and nothing leaked in. The lows are less sticky—everything that happens does not seem to get folded into the funk. And they never seem to have the duration they used to have—though some still long. Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would clean my plate and say thank

you. So if what was on my plate was depression....OK. If it was???.......OK. Not entirely coincidentally, the last drink or drug I had (except medical) was the last day in May 1985. Drinking and getting high were my major strategies for saying “No†to what life put on my plate (definitely not my only strategies, but major strategies). So the start was acceptance. And movement. I got up each day and to the best of my ability I did the next right thing. I went to work. I paid my bills. I paid my child support. I tried to do what a citizen

would do—all new stuff for me. Gradually my activity increased, first work, then school, work, more school, more school, more school, and, life spread out before me. Engagement in life increased—broadened and deepened. I learned a little at a time to let go of what my head had to say to me about myself, my future, my possibilities, and the same for others. Instead, I started using my values as a guide, not my thoughts. I was watching a ph series called The Power of Myth ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Power_of_Myth ) on Public TV and was saying "follow your bliss." And, he very clearly did not mean hedonism. I spent a long, long time, and still do, inside questions generated watching that show. What would it mean for me to follow my bliss? What would my life look like, over time, if I were to do that? What would I do in the next day, morning, moment, that act would move me in that direction (even ever so slightly)? Will my next act move me in the direction of my values? Or away? If away, can I just let that go for another day? also talked at length about the hero’s journey. What might my own “hero’s journey†look like? What if I let myself dare to have what called a “hero’s journey?†(Even now, I shake a little with fear that it might sound pompous, presumptuous to call my own journey a hero’s journey, or to even imagine one.) Why has this changed over the years? 1. I have practiced coming back to this moment, right now. Heaven knows I have had a lot of opportunities to practice having strayed from it so often (present moment).2. I have practiced staying more open to what I feel and think (acceptance) without attachment (defusion).3. I have practiced being in a continual process of authoring the direction my life is taking (values), and practiced letting go of rigid attachment to particular outcomes (defusion and acceptance).4. I have practice doing the next right thing (values and committed action).5. I have practiced noticing (self-as-context) that this practice has opened up possibilities that I would never in a million years been able to dream of prior to that choice, June 1, 1985. And, I have failed and I mean failed hard, hard, a lot, a lot, over the years, AND like the freakin' energizer bunny, I keep coming back to the practice. Sometimes sooner, sometimes later, but so far, I have come back one more time than I have gone away and this morning, this very morning, this very moment, I am declaring that practice to be enough...without justification, without consultation, without approval (including my own). I declare this practice to be enough. I expect my practice to change over

time. How? Can't say? Will it change? I would bet on that. But for this day....I am declaring International Enough Day. Here and now is enough. This practice, cracked and a bit leaky, is enough. I invite you all to imagine your own personal hero’s journey. I invite you to leave the end of the journey open to possibility. I invite you to let the tiniest act, this day, this morning, this moment, to be enough. my warm and good wishes to all in their practice—time for this one to head off to yoga,

G. 205 Peabody BuildingPsychology DepartmentUniversity of MississippiOxford, MS 38677ph: fax: academic homepage:www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htmalso check outwww.onelifellc.comwww.mindfulnessfortwo.comwww.facebook.com/kellygwilsonwww.tastybehaviorism.comwww.abnormalwootwoot.com

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I remember my father absolutely transfixed with watching Bill Moyers interviews with ph . It was so lovely to watch that opening in him. He tried to convey and instill this inspiration with all of us as well."Follow y/our bliss, whatever it may be" he said again and again, for many years after. He was so rooting for all of us to find our own bliss, rooting for each of his five children to find their own slice of freedom and authenticity. Even the girls (many of us!). A dedicated feminist, in that way. An amazing man, born before 1920.So grateful right now for just that..and longing for ways to find and live that valued bliss to honor he, my motherand my self more fully. In process, asking asking asking and yet as Jonathon Livingston

Seagull said:"It's good to be a seeker and sooner or later you need to be a finder, and then give onto the world the gifts you've found,for those who shall receive them." (paraphrasing). I little plaque hung on my bedroom wall with this saying for the duration of my late teens. Sayings such as this were very appealing in the 70's and I made sure to find the really cool ones and place them around the house. No protest there.I'd add I'm feeling a bit like I can do all of Seagull referred to, or rather-not necessarily in sequence, but more fluidly and back and forth: seek and find and give...seek, find, give..give, find, seek....and yes, it will be messy and unpredictable and hurtful and no matter. Keep going.kind regards,TheresaTo: ACT_for_the_Public Sent: Sat, June 4, 2011 12:28:17 PMSubject: Re: In Appreciation of Crashing, Bliss Following, Hero's Journeying, and Practice

Mrs Em - I really don't think means hero in the puffed up sense. The hero's journey is intended as a metaphor for each person's willingness to take their own journey. At least that is my take on it.best

G. 205 Peabody BuildingPsychology DepartmentUniversity of MississippiOxford, MS 38677ph: fax: academic homepage:www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htmalso check outwww.onelifellc.comwww.mindfulnessfortwo.comwww.facebook.com/kellygwilsonwww.tastybehaviorism.comwww.abnormalwootwoot.com

Really like reading that, especially the line about cleaning our plate and saying thank you. As for the hero... I have often thought the same, like I am more heroine-like now than some years ago. But lately I actually feel the opposite, I feel more ordinary and human than ever before. I also have been saying no for a long time. Now I am learning to say yes, it feels like I am more my true nature. I don't think I am more fantastical or heroine-like, but I do feel a bit more me. Thank you again, truly loved your text. Tread gently XXX, ______________________Signature: Mrs Em Equanimity This is my

personal blog where I record my experience applying Acceptance Commitment Therapy to my anxiety and agoraphobia in particular, and my life in general. Feel free to browse. http://eyeofthehurricane-act.blogspot.com/--- El sáb, 4/6/11, escribió:De: Asunto: In Appreciation of Crashing, Bliss Following, Hero's Journeying, and PracticePara: ACT_for_the_Public Fecha: sábado, 4 de junio, 2011 15:30

Here is a little appreciation I just posted on facebook. http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=10150622652525790I hope there is some use in it for my fellow travelers on the list.My experience with

crashing....Well,

it does not look like it looked in 1985. Then it was a really gory train wreck and would last for months and months...and longer, sometimes years. Let me give you an example from about 1981. I was unemployed. I did not work much before my 30th birthday, mostly off the grid, so unemployment was my usual occupation. But this was a time when I actually had a little job working at a community center. I actually liked that little job, though I drank at lunch as was typical for me in those days. Reagan got elected and the community center all but closed down with the immediate round of budget cuts. With the cuts, I was the first to go. My baseline was dysfunctional in the extreme, but I had been doing well, for me. Anyhow, I got into this funk. My wife was working a couple jobs to keep us afloat. Some days when I was home alone, I would literally crawl into the closet and sit at the back of it with the door closed. I recall a day when my little brother came over. I was laying on the couch watching TV with a case of beer setting beside the couch. He came in and sat down and said “What are you watching?†I had no particular idea. I had just turned it on, but not bothered to figure out what was on. Just laying there staring at

whatever was on that channel.

“Why are you watching this?â€â€”I shrug. I asked Dave if he wants a beer. He says “Sure†and I reached into the box by the couch and handed him one. He looks at me and says "This is warm!"—I shrug. It just did not matter. Nothing mattered. Just laying there, smoking weed, drinking beer, counting the days, waiting for the end, but fearful it would just go on and on and on. I have not got that funky in years. But do I still have down times? Yep. Sometimes they stretch out a bit—maybe even weeks. But the funkiness is different—more permeable to things going on around me. I don't stop moving, and, even when in a funk, there are times when I get engaged in things I care about and liven up. Richness can permeate—at least some. The lows

and

stuck spots are somehow more flexible. There are some ups mixed in with the downs. Before it was dead flat...life was a dull draining monotone. No variation and nothing leaked in. The lows are less sticky—everything that happens does not seem to get folded into the funk. And they never seem to have the duration they used to have—though some still long. Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would clean my plate and say thank

you. So if what was on my plate was depression....OK. If it was???.......OK. Not entirely coincidentally, the last drink or drug I had (except medical) was the last day in May 1985. Drinking and getting high were my major strategies for saying “No†to what life put on my plate (definitely not my only strategies, but major strategies). So the start was acceptance. And movement. I got up each day and to the best of my ability I did the next right thing. I went to work. I paid my bills. I paid my child support. I tried to do what a

citizen

would do—all new stuff for me. Gradually my activity increased, first work, then school, work, more school, more school, more school, and, life spread out before me. Engagement in life increased—broadened and deepened. I learned a little at a time to let go of what my head had to say to me about myself, my future, my possibilities, and the same for others. Instead, I started using my values as a guide, not my thoughts. I was watching a ph series called The Power of Myth ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Power_of_Myth ) on Public TV and was saying "follow your bliss." And, he very clearly did not mean hedonism. I spent a long, long time, and still do, inside questions generated watching that show. What would it mean for me to follow my bliss? What would my life look like, over time, if I were to do that? What would I do in the next day, morning, moment, that act would move me in that direction (even ever so slightly)? Will my next act move me in the direction of my values? Or away? If away, can I just let that go for another day? also talked at length about the hero’s journey. What might my own “hero’s journey†look like? What if I let myself dare to have what called a “hero’s journey?†(Even now, I shake a little with fear that it might sound pompous, presumptuous to call my own journey a hero’s journey, or to even imagine one.) Why has this changed over the years? 1. I have

practiced coming back to this moment, right now. Heaven knows I have had a lot of opportunities to practice having strayed from it so often (present moment).2. I have practiced staying more open to what I feel and think (acceptance) without attachment (defusion).3. I have practiced being in a continual process of authoring the direction my life is taking (values), and practiced letting go of rigid attachment to particular outcomes (defusion and acceptance).4. I have practice doing the next right thing (values and committed action).5. I have practiced noticing (self-as-context) that this practice has opened up possibilities that I would never in a million years been able to dream of prior to that choice, June 1, 1985. And, I have failed and I mean failed hard, hard, a lot, a lot, over the years, AND like the freakin' energizer bunny, I keep coming back to the practice. Sometimes sooner, sometimes later, but so far, I have come back one more time than I have gone away and this morning, this very morning, this very moment, I am declaring that practice to be enough...without justification, without consultation, without approval (including my own). I declare this practice to be enough. I expect my practice to change over

time. How? Can't say? Will it change? I would bet on that. But for this day....I am declaring International Enough Day. Here and now is enough. This practice, cracked and a bit leaky, is enough. I invite you all to imagine your own personal hero’s journey. I invite you to leave the end of the journey open to possibility. I invite you to let the tiniest act, this day, this morning, this moment, to be enough. my warm and good wishes to all in their practice—time for this one to head off to yoga,

G. 205 Peabody BuildingPsychology DepartmentUniversity of MississippiOxford, MS 38677ph: fax:

academic homepage:www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htmalso check outwww.onelifellc.comwww.mindfulnessfortwo.comwww.facebook.com/kellygwilsonwww.tastybehaviorism.comwww.abnormalwootwoot.com

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Hello ,

I know you love your yoga - today I was lucky enough to meet a Sannyasi. A wandering monk. Shipped over to England from India by a friend of mine!

I asked him what was the difference between prayer and meditation. He said that everything done with awareness was a prayer. I liked that - I thought you might too. Btw - he trained as a clinical psychologist before deciding to renounce everything and his Guru is Jesus! I liked that too!

Thanks for sharing your humanity

Simone

Subject: In Appreciation of Crashing, Bliss Following, Hero's Journeying, and PracticeTo: ACT_for_the_Public Date: Saturday, 4 June, 2011, 16:30

Here is a little appreciation I just posted on facebook.

http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=10150622652525790

I hope there is some use in it for my fellow travelers on the list.

My experience with crashing....Well, it does not look like it looked in 1985. Then it was a really gory train wreck and would last for months and months...and longer, sometimes years.

Let me give you an example from about 1981. I was unemployed. I did not work much before my 30th birthday, mostly off the grid, so unemployment was my usual occupation. But this was a time when I actually had a little job working at a community center. I actually liked that little job, though I drank at lunch as was typical for me in those days. Reagan got elected and the community center all but closed down with the immediate round of budget cuts. With the cuts, I was the first to go.

My baseline was dysfunctional in the extreme, but I had been doing well, for me. Anyhow, I got into this funk. My wife was working a couple jobs to keep us afloat. Some days when I was home alone, I would literally crawl into the closet and sit at the back of it with the door closed.

I recall a day when my little brother came over. I was laying on the couch watching TV with a case of beer setting beside the couch. He came in and sat down and said “What are you watching?†I had no particular idea. I had just turned it on, but not bothered to figure out what was on. Just laying there staring at whatever was on that channel. “Why are you watching this?â€â€”I shrug. I asked Dave if he wants a beer. He says “Sure†and I reached into the box by the couch and handed him one. He looks at me and says "This is warm!"—I shrug. It just did not matter. Nothing mattered. Just laying there, smoking weed, drinking beer, counting the days, waiting for the end, but fearful it would just go on and on and on.

I have not got that funky in years. But do I still have down times? Yep. Sometimes they stretch out a bit—maybe even weeks. But the funkiness is different—more permeable to things going on around me. I don't stop moving, and, even when in a funk, there are times when I get engaged in things I care about and liven up. Richness can permeate—at least some. The lows and stuck spots are somehow more flexible. There are some ups mixed in with the downs.

Before it was dead flat...life was a dull draining monotone. No variation and nothing leaked in. The lows are less sticky—everything that happens does not seem to get folded into the funk. And they never seem to have the duration they used to have—though some still long.

Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would clean my plate and say thank you.

So if what was on my plate was depression....OK. If it was???.......OK. Not entirely coincidentally, the last drink or drug I had (except medical) was the last day in May 1985. Drinking and getting high were my major strategies for saying “No†to what life put on my plate (definitely not my only strategies, but major strategies).

So the start was acceptance. And movement. I got up each day and to the best of my ability I did the next right thing. I went to work. I paid my bills. I paid my child support. I tried to do what a citizen would do—all new stuff for me.

Gradually my activity increased, first work, then school, work, more school, more school, more school, and, life spread out before me. Engagement in life increased—broadened and deepened. I learned a little at a time to let go of what my head had to say to me about myself, my future, my possibilities, and the same for others.

Instead, I started using my values as a guide, not my thoughts. I was watching a ph series called The Power of Myth ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Power_of_Myth ) on Public TV and was saying "follow your bliss." And, he very clearly did not mean hedonism.

I spent a long, long time, and still do, inside questions generated watching that show. What would it mean for me to follow my bliss? What would my life look like, over time, if I were to do that? What would I do in the next day, morning, moment, that act would move me in that direction (even ever so slightly)? Will my next act move me in the direction of my values? Or away? If away, can I just let that go for another day?

also talked at length about the hero’s journey. What might my own “hero’s journey†look like? What if I let myself dare to have what called a “hero’s journey?†(Even now, I shake a little with fear that it might sound pompous, presumptuous to call my own journey a hero’s journey, or to even imagine one.)

Why has this changed over the years?

1. I have practiced coming back to this moment, right now. Heaven knows I have had a lot of opportunities to practice having strayed from it so often (present moment).

2. I have practiced staying more open to what I feel and think (acceptance) without attachment (defusion).

3. I have practiced being in a continual process of authoring the direction my life is taking (values), and practiced letting go of rigid attachment to particular outcomes (defusion and acceptance).

4. I have practice doing the next right thing (values and committed action).

5. I have practiced noticing (self-as-context) that this practice has opened up possibilities that I would never in a million years been able to dream of prior to that choice, June 1, 1985.

And, I have failed and I mean failed hard, hard, a lot, a lot, over the years, AND like the freakin' energizer bunny, I keep coming back to the practice. Sometimes sooner, sometimes later, but so far, I have come back one more time than I have gone away and this morning, this very morning, this very moment, I am declaring that practice to be enough...without justification, without consultation, without approval (including my own). I declare this practice to be enough. I expect my practice to change over time. How? Can't say? Will it change? I would bet on that. But for this day....I am declaring International Enough Day. Here and now is enough. This practice, cracked and a bit leaky, is enough.

I invite you all to imagine your own personal hero’s journey. I invite you to leave the end of the journey open to possibility. I invite you to let the tiniest act, this day, this morning, this moment, to be enough.

my warm and good wishes to all in their practice—time for this one to head off to yoga,

G. 205 Peabody BuildingPsychology DepartmentUniversity of MississippiOxford, MS 38677ph: fax:

academic homepage:www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htm

also check outwww.onelifellc.comwww.mindfulnessfortwo.comwww.facebook.com/kellygwilsonwww.tastybehaviorism.comwww.abnormalwootwoot.com

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- As always, thank you! Hoping your travels are taking you to wonderful

places.

>

> Here is a little appreciation I just posted on facebook.

> http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=10150622652525790

>

> I hope there is some use in it for my fellow travelers on the list.

>

> My experience with crashing....Well, it does not look like it looked in 1985.

Then it was a really gory train wreck and would last for months and months...and

longer, sometimes years.

>

> Let me give you an example from about 1981. I was unemployed. I did not work

much before my 30th birthday, mostly off the grid, so unemployment was my usual

occupation. But this was a time when I actually had a little job working at a

community center. I actually liked that little job, though I drank at lunch as

was typical for me in those days. Reagan got elected and the community

center all but closed down with the immediate round of budget cuts. With the

cuts, I was the first to go.

>

> My baseline was dysfunctional in the extreme, but I had been doing well, for

me. Anyhow, I got into this funk. My wife was working a couple jobs to keep us

afloat. Some days when I was home alone, I would literally crawl into the closet

and sit at the back of it with the door closed.

>

> I recall a day when my little brother came over. I was laying on the couch

watching TV with a case of beer setting beside the couch. He came in and sat

down and said " What are you watching? " I had no particular idea. I had just

turned it on, but not bothered to figure out what was on. Just laying there

staring at whatever was on that channel. " Why are you watching this? " —I shrug. I

asked Dave if he wants a beer. He says " Sure " and I reached into the box by the

couch and handed him one. He looks at me and says " This is warm! " —I shrug. It

just did not matter. Nothing mattered. Just laying there, smoking weed, drinking

beer, counting the days, waiting for the end, but fearful it would just go on

and on and on.

>

> I have not got that funky in years. But do I still have down times? Yep.

Sometimes they stretch out a bit—maybe even weeks. But the funkiness is

different—more permeable to things going on around me. I don't stop moving, and,

even when in a funk, there are times when I get engaged in things I care about

and liven up. Richness can permeate—at least some. The lows and stuck spots are

somehow more flexible. There are some ups mixed in with the downs.

>

> Before it was dead flat...life was a dull draining monotone. No variation and

nothing leaked in. The lows are less sticky—everything that happens does not

seem to get folded into the funk. And they never seem to have the duration they

used to have—though some still long.

>

> Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a

deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would

clean my plate and say thank you.

>

> So if what was on my plate was depression....OK. If it was???.......OK. Not

entirely coincidentally, the last drink or drug I had (except medical) was the

last day in May 1985. Drinking and getting high were my major strategies for

saying " No " to what life put on my plate (definitely not my only strategies, but

major strategies).

>

> So the start was acceptance. And movement. I got up each day and to the best

of my ability I did the next right thing. I went to work. I paid my bills. I

paid my child support. I tried to do what a citizen would do—all new stuff for

me.

>

> Gradually my activity increased, first work, then school, work, more school,

more school, more school, and, life spread out before me. Engagement in life

increased—broadened and deepened. I learned a little at a time to let go of what

my head had to say to me about myself, my future, my possibilities, and the same

for others.

>

> Instead, I started using my values as a guide, not my thoughts. I was watching

a ph series called The Power of Myth (

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Power_of_Myth ) on Public TV and was

saying " follow your bliss. " And, he very clearly did not mean hedonism.

>

> I spent a long, long time, and still do, inside questions generated watching

that show. What would it mean for me to follow my bliss? What would my life look

like, over time, if I were to do that? What would I do in the next day, morning,

moment, that act would move me in that direction (even ever so slightly)? Will

my next act move me in the direction of my values? Or away? If away, can I just

let that go for another day?

>

> also talked at length about the hero's journey. What might my own

" hero's journey " look like? What if I let myself dare to have what

called a " hero's journey? " (Even now, I shake a little with fear that it might

sound pompous, presumptuous to call my own journey a hero's journey, or to even

imagine one.)

>

> Why has this changed over the years?

>

> 1. I have practiced coming back to this moment, right now. Heaven knows I have

had a lot of opportunities to practice having strayed from it so often (present

moment).

> 2. I have practiced staying more open to what I feel and think (acceptance)

without attachment (defusion).

> 3. I have practiced being in a continual process of authoring the direction my

life is taking (values), and practiced letting go of rigid attachment to

particular outcomes (defusion and acceptance).

> 4. I have practice doing the next right thing (values and committed action).

> 5. I have practiced noticing (self-as-context) that this practice has opened

up possibilities that I would never in a million years been able to dream of

prior to that choice, June 1, 1985.

>

> And, I have failed and I mean failed hard, hard, a lot, a lot, over the years,

AND like the freakin' energizer bunny, I keep coming back to the practice.

Sometimes sooner, sometimes later, but so far, I have come back one more time

than I have gone away and this morning, this very morning, this very moment, I

am declaring that practice to be enough...without justification, without

consultation, without approval (including my own). I declare this practice to be

enough. I expect my practice to change over time. How? Can't say? Will it

change? I would bet on that. But for this day....I am declaring International

Enough Day. Here and now is enough. This practice, cracked and a bit leaky, is

enough.

>

> I invite you all to imagine your own personal hero's journey. I invite you to

leave the end of the journey open to possibility. I invite you to let the

tiniest act, this day, this morning, this moment, to be enough.

>

> my warm and good wishes to all in their practice—time for this one to head off

to yoga,

>

> G.

> 205 Peabody Building

> Psychology Department

> University of Mississippi

> Oxford, MS 38677

>

> ph:

> fax:

>

> academic homepage:

> www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htm

>

> also check out

> www.onelifellc.com

> www.mindfulnessfortwo.com

> www.facebook.com/kellygwilson

> www.tastybehaviorism.com

> www.abnormalwootwoot.com

>

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Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal

with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would clean my

plate and say thank you.

I'm curious - what was it on that day that made you " wake up " and start

to move? Did you have some sort of realization or epiphany? And what gave you

the strength to keep going, to commit to travelling that path no matter what,

and to keep coming back to it when you strayed?

Cheers

Kate

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I wondered this too :) ______________________Signature: Mrs Em Equanimity This is my personal blog where I record my experience applying Acceptance Commitment Therapy to my anxiety and agoraphobia in particular, and my life in general. Feel free to browse. http://eyeofthehurricane-act.blogspot.com/--- El dom, 5/6/11, kate_7250 escribió:De: kate_7250 Asunto: Re: In Appreciation of Crashing, Bliss Following, Hero's Journeying, and PracticePara: ACT_for_the_Public Fecha: domingo, 5 de junio, 2011 01:45

Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would clean my plate and say thank you.

I'm curious - what was it on that day that made you "wake up" and start to move? Did you have some sort of realization or epiphany? And what gave you the strength to keep going, to commit to travelling that path no matter what, and to keep coming back to it when you strayed?

Cheers

Kate

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A side comment- I've learned that "Saying yes" (Acceptance/willingness) is a continuous process, not just a one time declaration. It is committed action, not saying the words. Waiting until later is" saying no" in the moment.BillSent via DROID on Verizon Wireless Re: In Appreciation of Crashing, Bliss Following, Hero's Journeying, and PracticeMrs Em - I really don't think means hero in the puffed up sense. The hero's journey is intended as a metaphor for each person's willingness to take their own journey. At least that is my take on it.best G. 205 Peabody BuildingPsychology DepartmentUniversity of MississippiOxford, MS 38677ph: fax: academic homepage:www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htmalso check outwww.onelifellc.comwww.mindfulnessfortwo.comwww.facebook.com/kellygwilsonwww.tastybehaviorism.comwww.abnormalwootwoot.com Really like reading that, especially the line about cleaning our plate and saying thank you. As for the hero... I have often thought the same, like I am more heroine-like now than some years ago. But lately I actually feel the opposite, I feel more ordinary and human than ever before. I also have been saying no for a long time. Now I am learning to say yes, it feels like I am more my true nature. I don't think I am more fantastical or heroine-like, but I do feel a bit more me. Thank you again, truly loved your text. Tread gently XXX, ______________________Signature: Mrs Em Equanimity This is mypersonal blog where I record my experience applying Acceptance Commitment Therapy to my anxiety and agoraphobia in particular, and my life in general. Feel free to browse. http://eyeofthehurricane-act.blogspot.com/--- El sáb, 4/6/11, escribió:De: Asunto: In Appreciation of Crashing, Bliss Following, Hero's Journeying, and PracticePara: ACT_for_the_Public Fecha: sábado, 4 de junio, 2011 15:30 Here is a little appreciation I just posted on facebook. http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=10150622652525790I hope there is some use in it for my fellow travelers on the list.My experience with crashing....Well,it does not look like it looked in 1985. Then it was a really gory train wreck and would last for months and months...and longer, sometimes years. Let me give you an example from about 1981. I was unemployed. I did not work much before my 30th birthday, mostly off the grid, so unemployment was my usual occupation. But this was a time when I actually had a little job working at a community center. I actually liked that little job, though I drank at lunch as was typical for me in those days. Reagan got elected and the community center all but closed down with the immediate round of budget cuts. With the cuts, I was the first to go. My baseline was dysfunctional in the extreme, but I had been doing well, for me. Anyhow, I got into this funk. My wife was working a couple jobs to keep us afloat. Some days when I was home alone, I would literally crawl into the closet and sit at the back of it with the door closed. I recall a day when my little brother came over. I was laying on the couch watching TV with a case of beer setting beside the couch. He came in and sat down and said “What are you watching?†I had no particular idea. I had just turned it on, but not bothered to figure out what was on. Just laying there staring at whatever was on that channel.“Why are you watching this?â€â€”I shrug. I asked Dave if he wants a beer. He says “Sure†and I reached into the box by the couch and handed him one. He looks at me and says "This is warm!"—I shrug. It just did not matter. Nothing mattered. Just laying there, smoking weed, drinking beer, counting the days, waiting for the end, but fearful it would just go on and on and on. I have not got that funky in years. But do I still have down times? Yep. Sometimes they stretch out a bit—maybe even weeks. But the funkiness is different—more permeable to things going on around me. I don't stop moving, and, even when in a funk, there are times when I get engaged in things I care about and liven up. Richness can permeate—at least some. The lows andstuck spots are somehow more flexible. There are some ups mixed in with the downs. Before it was dead flat...life was a dull draining monotone. No variation and nothing leaked in. The lows are less sticky—everything that happens does not seem to get folded into the funk. And they never seem to have the duration they used to have—though some still long. Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would clean my plate and say thankyou. So if what was on my plate was depression....OK. If it was???.......OK. Not entirely coincidentally, the last drink or drug I had (except medical) was the last day in May 1985. Drinking and getting high were my major strategies for saying “No†to what life put on my plate (definitely not my only strategies, but major strategies). So the start was acceptance. And movement. I got up each day and to the best of my ability I did the next right thing. I went to work. I paid my bills. I paid my child support. I tried to do what a citizenwould do—all new stuff for me. Gradually my activity increased, first work, then school, work, more school, more school, more school, and, life spread out before me. Engagement in life increased—broadened and deepened. I learned a little at a time to let go of what my head had to say to me about myself, my future, my possibilities, and the same for others. Instead, I started using my values as a guide, not my thoughts. I was watching a ph series called The Power of Myth ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Power_of_Myth ) on Public TV and was saying "follow your bliss." And, he very clearly did not mean hedonism. I spent a long, long time, and still do, inside questions generated watching that show. What would it mean for me to follow my bliss? What would my life look like, over time, if I were to do that? What would I do in the next day, morning, moment, that act would move me in that direction (even ever so slightly)? Will my next act move me in the direction of my values? Or away? If away, can I just let that go for another day? also talked at length about the hero’s journey. What might my own “hero’s journey†look like? What if I let myself dare to have what called a “hero’s journey?†(Even now, I shake a little with fear that it might sound pompous, presumptuous to call my own journey a hero’s journey, or to even imagine one.) Why has this changed over the years? 1. I have practiced coming back to this moment, right now. Heaven knows I have had a lot of opportunities to practice having strayed from it so often (present moment).2. I have practiced staying more open to what I feel and think (acceptance) without attachment (defusion).3. I have practiced being in a continual process of authoring the direction my life is taking (values), and practiced letting go of rigid attachment to particular outcomes (defusion and acceptance).4. I have practice doing the next right thing (values and committed action).5. I have practiced noticing (self-as-context) that this practice has opened up possibilities that I would never in a million years been able to dream of prior to that choice, June 1, 1985. And, I have failed and I mean failed hard, hard, a lot, a lot, over the years, AND like the freakin' energizer bunny, I keep coming back to the practice. Sometimes sooner, sometimes later, but so far, I have come back one more time than I have gone away and this morning, this very morning, this very moment, I am declaring that practice to be enough...without justification, without consultation, without approval (including my own). I declare this practice to be enough. I expect my practice to change overtime. How? Can't say? Will it change? I would bet on that. But for this day....I am declaring International Enough Day. Here and now is enough. This practice, cracked and a bit leaky, is enough. I invite you all to imagine your own personal hero’s journey. I invite you to leave the end of the journey open to possibility. I invite you to let the tiniest act, this day, this morning, this moment, to be enough. my warm and good wishes to all in their practice—time for this one to head off to yoga, G. 205 Peabody BuildingPsychology DepartmentUniversity of MississippiOxford, MS 38677ph: fax: academic homepage:www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htmalso check outwww.onelifellc.comwww.mindfulnessfortwo.comwww.facebook.com/kellygwilsonwww.tastybehaviorism.comwww.abnormalwootwoot.com

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I'm curious - what was it on that day that made you "wake up" and start to move? Did you have some sort of realization or epiphany? And what gave you the strength to keep going, to commit to travelling that path no matter what, and to keep coming back to it when you strayed?Don't know that I could say for a fact, but my impression: I had been in a locked psychiatric hospital for a month in February/March 1985 where I got sober. It was a super long, very, very shaky detox. And when I say shaky, I mean literally. I was prevented from delirium tremens only by medical monitoring and detox drugs. Super suicidal. There I had the good fortune of meeting a very small number of people who knew about acceptance. I went to a rehab for a month following the hospitalization. And, I was able to accept that I was someone who just could not drink and get high without disastrous consequences. My life for the prior 15 years was my evidence. Persistent suicidal depression was part of the picture, and had been for a long time. That plus drugs and alcohol were a bad cocktail. I had the mistaken notion, leaving rehab, that being utterly convinced that I could not drink and get high would prevent me from drinking and getting high--I was certain of it. I was wrong. I bounced. First, lightly, then hard and into a complete drunken blackout the last day of May 1985.The first day of June I had two things that I knew with absolute equal and magnificent force: 1. that I absolutely could not drink, and 2. that I absolutely could not not drink.For that day I stopped fighting and agreed to be right where I was. No other action than acceptance seemed possible.And, I started practicing and working to surround myself in a conversation about acceptance, engagement, and practice....just a couple friends, people in school who were attracted to that conversation, later teachers, mentors, students. and on. Moments, hours, days stretched into years, with a lot of bloody falls along the way, and I sit here this morning, in my wife's lovely back garden writing to you.That is my story and I am sticking to it, for now anyway:-)namaste,

G. 205 Peabody BuildingPsychology DepartmentUniversity of MississippiOxford, MS 38677ph: fax: academic homepage:www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htmalso check outwww.onelifellc.comwww.mindfulnessfortwo.comwww.facebook.com/kellygwilsonwww.tastybehaviorism.comwww.abnormalwootwoot.com

Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would clean my plate and say thank you.

I'm curious - what was it on that day that made you "wake up" and start to move? Did you have some sort of realization or epiphany? And what gave you the strength to keep going, to commit to travelling that path no matter what, and to keep coming back to it when you strayed?

Cheers

Kate

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Thanks for being so honest, . I have a friend with OCD who believes that his only hope (again!) is to reach rock bottom and then he will be motivated to do therapy. It's so sad to see him locking himself in a prison and thinking that he will only get better if he is thrown (throws himself) into an even deeper dungeon.

Just wondering if you, or anyone else, have any tips on how to introduce someone to ACT (someone who can't use a book because it would contaminate his house to take it home!), without sounding trite.

I've spoken to him about living the life he really wants. He has insight, realises his contamination anxiety is overvalued, but is just too scared to stop his compulsions.

I am not pushy as that would just shut down any avenues for helping him and even so he has at times got very defensive if he thinks he is being pushed. Luckily we both have great senses of humour. He is just such a lovely bloke that it really hurts to see him suffer.

S.

Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would clean my plate and say thank you.I'm curious - what was it on that day that made you "wake up" and start to move? Did you have some sort of realization or epiphany? And what gave you the strength to keep going, to commit to travelling that path no matter what, and to keep coming back to it when you strayed?CheersKate

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It sounds as though you hit the proverbial "rock bottom" one hears about, that place from which the only direction is up. I don't know this for a fact, though, so it's only supposition. In my own life I've never been in that position, although I continue to sporadically drink and use other means for fending off the void, for want of a better term. I would characterize where I am as a kind of limbo.Regards,Detlef> > > > Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would clean my plate and say thank you.> > > > I'm curious - what was it on that day that made you "wake up" and start to move? Did you have some sort of realization or epiphany? And what gave you the strength to keep going, to commit to travelling that path no matter what, and to keep coming back to it when you strayed?> > > > Cheers> > Kate> > > >>

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I used to think that "rock bottom" was a place. I am now of the opinion that we can choose it. We can declare that anywhere we are is "rock bottom." That said, it is hard to get people to take help that they are saying no to. I would encourage the person to get to a good CBT (meant broadly, CBT, ACT, etc) person for treatment. And then, I would let it go and be a friend. Pestering seems ineffective. Saying, xxx is available, and I understand if it is not your day. OK. I have personally been remarkably ineffective at convincing people to go to treatment. I am a good resource once they choose, but before, not so much.best

G. 205 Peabody BuildingPsychology DepartmentUniversity of MississippiOxford, MS 38677ph: fax: academic homepage:www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htmalso check outwww.onelifellc.comwww.mindfulnessfortwo.comwww.facebook.com/kellygwilsonwww.tastybehaviorism.comwww.abnormalwootwoot.com

It sounds as though you hit the proverbial "rock bottom" one hears about, that place from which the only direction is up. I don't know this for a fact, though, so it's only supposition. In my own life I've never been in that position, although I continue to sporadically drink and use other means for fending off the void, for want of a better term. I would characterize where I am as a kind of limbo.Regards,Detlef> > > > Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would clean my plate and say thank you.> > > > I'm curious - what was it on that day that made you "wake up" and start to move? Did you have some sort of realization or epiphany? And what gave you the strength to keep goi

ng, to commit to travelling that path no matter what, and to keep coming back to it when you strayed?> > > > Cheers> > Kate> > > >>

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Thanks, kelly.

Unfortunately he's already had three lots of very good CBT and is getting CBT now and worrying himself silly that it isn't working and he knows it's up to him. As you suggest it's about his willingness, not about the therapist not being effective. He's a great therapist.

I agree totally about not pestering. Ironically even while being totally stuck in the prison he realises is of his own making he is still able to help me with my OCD. I imagine there are examples of that in this forum too. Sometimes it's easier to offer advice to others than to take one's own advice about one's own situation. I don't mean that in any negative sense either. It sometimes seems like he cares more about others suffering than about himself.

I think the most important thing is to be there for someone when they reach out and maybe accepting their support when we are in trouble is the best way of letting them know they are valued?

It's distressing though. It makes me realise how hard it must have been for my husband and children to see me suffering when I was at my worst.

S.

It sounds as though you hit the proverbial "rock bottom" one hears about, that place from which the only direction is up. I don't know this for a fact, though, so it's only supposition. In my own life I've never been in that position, although I continue to sporadically drink and use other means for fending off the void, for want of a better term. I would characterize where I am as a kind of limbo.Regards,Detlef> > > > Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would clean my plate and say thank you.> > > > I'm curious - what was it on that day that made you "wake up" and start to move? Did you have some sort of realization or epiphany? And what gave you the strength to keep goi ng, to commit to travelling that path no matter what, and to keep coming back to it when you strayed?> > > > Cheers> > Kate> > >

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If his compulsions are where he goes voluntarily, then perhaps this is the journey a change facilitator would need to make with him...?On my path, mindfulness is a tool for change and motivational interviewing (MI) is a skill to facilitate offering the tool to people.D

Thanks for being so honest, . I have a friend with OCD who believes that his only hope (again!) is to reach rock bottom and then he will be motivated to do therapy. It's so sad to see him locking himself in a prison and thinking that he will only get better if he is thrown (throws himself) into an even deeper dungeon.

Just wondering if you, or anyone else, have any tips on how to introduce someone to ACT (someone who can't use a book because it would contaminate his house to take it home!), without sounding trite.

I've spoken to him about living the life he really wants. He has insight, realises his contamination anxiety is overvalued, but is just too scared to stop his compulsions.

I am not pushy as that would just shut down any avenues for helping him and even so he has at times got very defensive if he thinks he is being pushed. Luckily we both have great senses of humour. He is just such a lovely bloke that it really hurts to see him suffer.

S.

Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would clean my plate and say thank you.I'm curious - what was it on that day that made you "wake up" and start to move? Did you have some sort of realization or epiphany? And what gave you the strength to keep going, to commit to travelling that path no matter what, and to keep coming back to it when you strayed?CheersKate

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, what you wrote here about your process has yet again been so amazingly helpful that I don't think I know just how helpful yet, but it's starting to sink in. The beautiful posts you shared last year here

with this community have already helped me so much and now here again, a

bit more. It's as though each time I read about your journey, I am hearing new things and I don't know if it's my readiness and willingness

to jump and take some steps on my own behalf or what but wow, just SO grateful and honored to be privy and stand witness to your journey, which you depict so poetically and so down to earth at once.

These two things yesterday really jumped out at me, as I hadn't quite heard you say this before this way..and you probably did and I wasn't listening.

The first day of June I had two things that I knew with absolute equal and magnificent force: 1. that I absolutely could not drink, and 2. that I absolutely could not not drink.

For that day I stopped fighting and agreed to be right where I was. No other action than acceptance seemed possible.

Whew! That alone I imagine would be enough reason to go ahead and drink for anyone looking for a darn good reason.So somehow you didn't try to manage anything, it seems.. like perhaps a larger part of you (SAC) caught a glimpse of these two very compelling and competing thoughts, you saw accepting was truly the only thing indicated (?).

Amazing, just breath-taking really. That is heroic, I'd say.

And, I started practicing and working to surround myself in a conversation about acceptance, engagement, and practice....just a couple friends, people in

school who were attracted to that conversation, later teachers, mentors, students. and on.

I'm wondering if you could clarify a bit more what you're referring to here more specifically re: this practicing and working to surround yourself in a conversation about acceptance, engagement, and practice.. how did you come upon this specific intention and how do you happen upon these few friends? I mean, it's really hard to find friends like that, I'd think. Maybe not. I mean, it's not like you consciously put up a banner or want ad: "Looking to surround myself with those willing to dive into conversations about acceptance, engagement, and practice..all interested please call me at..." Or maybe you did so to speak-- with your intention (?) with prayer(?)with willingness (?). My mind is saying: "I want to find friends like that too!"

Thanks so much again and again for these generous offerings,

Theresap.s. And BTW, I love the declaration of "International Enough Day"! I love that you declare it just like that! Can it be that easy really? Do I have the right to declare stuff like that? (mind wonders..and then, well of course, whose life is this anyway?..but really, truly, do I? Even when everything and everyone around me seem to be arguing otherwise?)

Re: Re: In Appreciation of Crashing, Bliss Following, Hero's Journeying, and PracticeI'm

curious - what was it on that day that made you "wake up" and start to move? Did you have some sort of realization or epiphany? And what gave you the strength to keep going, to commit to travelling that path no matter what, and to keep coming back to it when you strayed?Don't

know that I could say for a fact, but my impression: I had been in a locked psychiatric hospital for a month in February/March 1985 where I got sober. It was a super long, very, very shaky detox. And when I say shaky, I mean literally. I was prevented from delirium tremens only by medical monitoring and detox drugs. Super suicidal. There

I had the good fortune of meeting a very small number of people who knew about acceptance. I went to a rehab for a month following the hospitalization. And, I was able to accept that I was someone who just could not drink and get high without disastrous consequences. My life for the prior 15 years was my evidence. Persistent suicidal depression was part of the picture, and had been for a long time. That plus drugs and alcohol were a bad cocktail. I had the mistaken notion, leaving rehab, that being utterly convinced that I could not drink and get high would prevent me from drinking and getting high--I was certain of it. I was wrong. I bounced. First, lightly, then hard and into a complete drunken blackout the last day of May 1985.The first day of June I had two things that I knew with absolute equal and magnificent force: 1. that I absolutely could not drink, and 2. that I absolutely could not not drink.For that day I stopped fighting and agreed to be right where I was. No other action than acceptance seemed possible.And,

I started practicing and working to surround myself in a conversation about acceptance, engagement, and practice....just a couple friends, people in school who were attracted to that conversation, later teachers, mentors, students. and on. Moments, hours, days stretched into

years, with a lot of bloody falls along the way, and I sit here this morning, in my wife's lovely back garden writing to you.That is my story and I am sticking to it, for now anyway:-)namaste,

G. 205 Peabody BuildingPsychology DepartmentUniversity of MississippiOxford, MS 38677ph: fax: academic homepage:www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htmalso check outwww.onelifellc.comwww.mindfulnessfortwo.comwww.facebook.com/kellygwilsonwww.tastybehaviorism.comwww.abnormalwootwoot.com

`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made

a deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I

would clean my plate and say thank you.

I'm curious - what was it on that day that made you "wake up" and

start to move? Did you have some sort of realization or epiphany? And

what gave you the strength to keep going, to commit to travelling that path no matter what, and to keep coming back to it when you strayed?

Cheers

Kate

To: ACT_for_the_Public Sent: Sat, June 4, 2011 8:30:38 AMSubject: In Appreciation of Crashing, Bliss Following, Hero's Journeying, and Practice

Here is a little appreciation I just posted on facebook. http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=10150622652525790I hope there is some use in it for my fellow travelers on the list.My experience with

crashing....Well, it does not look like it looked in 1985. Then it was a really gory train wreck and would last for months and months...and longer, sometimes years. Let me give you an example from about 1981. I was unemployed. I did not work much before my 30th birthday, mostly off the grid, so unemployment was my usual occupation. But this was a time when I actually had a little job working at a community center. I actually liked that little job, though I drank at lunch as was typical for me in those days. Reagan got elected and the community center all but closed down with the immediate round of budget cuts. With the cuts, I was the first to go. My baseline was dysfunctional in the extreme, but I had been doing well, for me. Anyhow, I got into this funk. My wife was working a couple jobs to keep us afloat. Some days when I was home alone, I would literally crawl into the closet and sit at the back of it with the door closed. I recall a day when my little brother came over. I was laying on the couch watching TV with a case of beer setting beside the couch. He came in and sat down and said “What are you watching?†I had no particular idea. I had just turned it on, but not bothered to figure out what was on. Just laying there staring at

whatever was on that channel. “Why are you watching this?â€â€”I shrug. I asked Dave if he wants a beer. He says “Sure†and I reached into the box by the couch and handed him one. He looks at me and says "This is warm!"—I shrug. It just did not matter. Nothing mattered. Just laying there, smoking weed, drinking beer, counting the days, waiting for the end, but fearful it would just go on and on and on. I have not got that funky in years. But do I still have down times? Yep. Sometimes they stretch out a bit—maybe even weeks. But the funkiness is different—more permeable to things going on around me. I don't stop moving, and, even when in a funk, there are times when I get engaged in things I care about and liven up. Richness can

permeate—at least some. The lows and stuck spots are somehow more flexible. There are some ups mixed in with the downs. Before it was dead flat...life was a dull draining monotone. No variation and nothing leaked in. The lows are less sticky—everything that happens does not seem to get folded into the funk. And they never seem to have the duration they used to have—though some still long. Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day,

I would clean my plate and say thank you. So if what was on my plate was depression....OK. If it was???.......OK. Not entirely coincidentally, the last drink or drug I had (except medical) was the last day in May 1985. Drinking and getting high were my major strategies for saying “No†to what life put on my plate (definitely not my only strategies, but major strategies). So the start was acceptance. And movement. I got up each day and to the best of my ability I did the next right thing. I went to work. I paid my bills. I paid my

child support. I tried to do what a citizen would do—all new stuff for me. Gradually my activity increased, first work, then school, work, more school, more school, more school, and, life spread out before me. Engagement in life increased—broadened and deepened. I learned a little at a time to let go of what my head had to say to me about myself, my future, my possibilities, and the same for others. Instead, I started using my values as a guide, not my thoughts. I was watching a ph series called The Power of Myth

( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Power_of_Myth ) on Public TV and was saying "follow your bliss." And, he very clearly did not mean hedonism. I spent a long, long time, and still do, inside questions generated watching that show. What would it mean for me to follow my bliss? What would my life look like, over time, if I were to do that? What would I do in the next day, morning, moment, that act would move me in that direction (even ever so slightly)? Will my next act move me in the direction of my values? Or away? If away, can I just let that go

for another day? also talked at length about the hero’s journey. What might my own “hero’s journey†look like? What if I let myself dare to have what called a “hero’s journey?†(Even now, I shake a little with fear that it might sound pompous, presumptuous to call my own journey a hero’s journey, or to even imagine one.) Why has this changed over the years? 1. I have practiced coming back to this moment, right now. Heaven knows I have had a lot of opportunities to practice having strayed from it so often (present moment).2. I have practiced staying more open to what I feel and think (acceptance) without attachment (defusion).3. I have practiced being in a continual process of authoring the direction my life is taking (values), and practiced letting go of rigid attachment to particular outcomes (defusion and acceptance).4. I have practice doing the next right thing (values and committed action).5. I have practiced noticing (self-as-context) that this practice has opened up possibilities that I would never in a million years been able to dream of prior to that choice, June 1, 1985. And, I have failed and I mean failed hard, hard, a lot, a lot, over the years, AND like the freakin' energizer bunny, I keep coming back to the practice. Sometimes sooner, sometimes later, but so far, I have come back one more time than I have gone away and this morning, this very morning, this very moment, I am declaring that practice to be enough...without justification, without consultation, without approval (including my own). I declare this practice to be

enough. I expect my practice to change over time. How? Can't say? Will it change? I would bet on that. But for this day....I am declaring International Enough Day. Here and now is enough. This practice, cracked and a bit leaky, is enough. I invite you all to imagine your own personal hero’s journey. I invite you to leave the end of the journey open to possibility. I invite you to let the tiniest act, this day, this morning, this moment, to be enough. my warm and good wishes to all in their practice—time for this one to head off to

yoga,

G. 205 Peabody BuildingPsychology DepartmentUniversity of MississippiOxford, MS 38677ph: fax: academic homepage:www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htmalso check outwww.onelifellc.comwww.mindfulnessfortwo.comwww.facebook.com/kellygwilsonwww.tastybehaviorism.comwww.abnormalwootwoot.com

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I'm in the process of looking for help and trying to be discriminating while also being flexible. I too see that seeking and receiving help is a lot about about my own willingness to accept first off that I really do need help along with willingness to be ready for a lot of discomfort and unknowns. This includes accepting with compassion the imperfections/ limitations of the therapist or whomever is kind enough to reach out to me. In the past, it's been: "Here I am, fix me and do it how I imagine you ought to, in a way that I will like". Yeah, good luck with that..talk about a set up for lots of frustration and distraction! So I take responsibility for approaching some with this mindset in the past and work

actively to move away from that. Much of my therapy before ACT (which is when I had almost all of it) became yet more avoidance: very mindy, trying to get to the bottom of things (as though there was such a thing), trying to sort it all out, figure out the who's and whys and what's, lots of story-telling which I love to do...and worse, fusing with the story-telling and painting myself in a corner as such and even convincing the therapist just how ill I was and then later realizing I had learned too well to over-pathologize myself --maybe to please the therapist, maybe to avoid, maybe both..but bottom line not a terribly healthy process and and round and round we went, neither of us putting the brakes on this sort of thing. And neither the therapists nor I really took notice of this as a problem in and of itself. Now, post-ACT, I certainly do. It was a collusion of sorts as I look back, with one rare exception of one exceptional therapist

early on who was able to be fully present with my pain. No accident he was the most helpful. Mostly now the kinds of things I see working better is when both client and therapist open up with humility, with willingness to be human, wrong, and present with the pain while nudging me to follow my bliss as well. And not continue with a stance that is quite prevalent still today that says: "here is someone before me who is broken in need of being fixed and in need of results, since after all, I'm here to do something, they're paying me for some thing, right?". And I'm not seeing that's too easy to find. Not to mention many folks just can't afford some of the better ones out there who are trained in mindfulness work. So yeah, there is nothing like a good friend or two who sees me as whole right here, right now, who also encourages me to keep moving

forward because they know I'm up for more and they remind me of who I am. Just the other day, I told my big brother (whom I'm very close with) "I really hate myself today". (I was very dramatic that day). I said other things too, but that's the gist of it. He responded: "Take care of yourself. You are allowed to hate yourself for today, but that's it. Move forward. Tomorrow is a new day. Each day you can make a different decision about how you view your life and the near future. I love you." Pretty amazing brother, I'd say. (he knows nothing of ACT, just a lot about living fully and moving forward). Anyway, S., I hope your friend finds what he needs. Sounds like he's lucky to have a friend in you.kind regards,theresaTo: ACT_for_the_Public Sent: Sun, June 5, 2011 9:12:04 AMSubject: Re: Re: In Appreciation of Crashing, Bliss Following, Hero's Journeying, and Practice Thanks, kelly. Unfortunately he's

already had three lots of very good CBT and is getting CBT now and worrying himself silly that it isn't working and he knows it's up to him. As you suggest it's about his willingness, not about the therapist not being effective. He's a great therapist. I agree totally about not pestering. Ironically even while being totally stuck in the prison he realises is of his own making he is still able to help me with my OCD. I imagine there are examples of that in this forum too. Sometimes it's easier to offer advice to others than to take one's own advice about one's own situation. I don't mean that in any negative sense either. It sometimes seems like he cares more about others suffering than about himself. I think the most important thing is to be there for someone when they reach out and maybe accepting their support when we are in trouble is the best way of letting them know they

are valued? It's distressing though. It makes me realise how hard it must have been for my husband and children to see me suffering when I was at my worst. S. It sounds as though you hit the proverbial "rock bottom" one hears about, that place from which the only direction is up. I don't know this for a fact, though, so it's only supposition. In my own life I've never been in that position, although I continue to sporadically drink and use other means for fending off the void, for want of a better term. I would characterize where

I am as a kind of limbo.Regards,Detlef> > > > Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal with

the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would clean my plate and say thank you.> > > > I'm curious - what was it on that day that made you "wake up" and start to move? Did you have some sort of realization or epiphany? And what gave you the strength to keep goi ng, to commit to travelling that path no matter what, and to keep coming back to it when you strayed?> > > > Cheers> > Kate> > > >>

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another side comment..I'm not sure I'd say with full confidence that for everyone waiting till later = saying no in the moment. It may or may not depending on a bunch of other stuff.TheresaTo: ACT_for_the_Public Sent: Sun, June 5, 2011 5:50:39 AMSubject: Re: In Appreciation of Crashing, Bliss Following, Hero's Journeying, and Practice

A side comment- I've learned that "Saying yes" (Acceptance/willingness) is a continuous process, not just a one time declaration. It is committed action, not saying the words. Waiting until later is" saying no" in the moment.BillSent via DROID on Verizon Wireless Re: In Appreciation of Crashing, Bliss Following, Hero's Journeying, and Practice

Mrs Em - I really don't think means hero in the puffed up sense. The hero's journey is intended as a metaphor for each person's willingness to take their own journey. At least that is my take on it.best

G. 205 Peabody BuildingPsychology DepartmentUniversity of MississippiOxford, MS 38677ph: fax: academic homepage:www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htmalso check outwww.onelifellc.comwww.mindfulnessfortwo.comwww.facebook.com/kellygwilsonwww.tastybehaviorism.comwww.abnormalwootwoot.com

Really like reading that, especially the line about cleaning our plate and saying thank you. As for the hero... I have often thought the same, like I am more heroine-like now than some years ago. But lately I actually feel the opposite, I feel more ordinary and human than ever before. I also have been saying no for a long time. Now I am learning to say yes, it feels like I am more my true nature. I don't think I am more fantastical or heroine-like, but I do feel a bit more me. Thank you again, truly loved your text. Tread gently XXX, ______________________Signature: Mrs Em Equanimity This is my

personal blog where I record my experience applying Acceptance Commitment Therapy to my anxiety and agoraphobia in particular, and my life in general. Feel free to browse. http://eyeofthehurricane-act.blogspot.com/--- El sáb, 4/6/11, escribió:De: Asunto: In Appreciation of Crashing, Bliss Following, Hero's Journeying, and PracticePara: ACT_for_the_Public Fecha: sábado, 4 de junio, 2011 15:30

Here is a little appreciation I just posted on facebook. http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=10150622652525790I hope there is some use in it for my fellow travelers on the list.My experience with

crashing....Well,

it does not look like it looked in 1985. Then it was a really gory train wreck and would last for months and months...and longer, sometimes years. Let me give you an example from about 1981. I was unemployed. I did not work much before my 30th birthday, mostly off the grid, so unemployment was my usual occupation. But this was a time when I actually had a little job working at a community center. I actually liked that little job, though I drank at lunch as was typical for me in those days. Reagan got elected and the community center all but closed down with the immediate round of budget cuts. With the cuts, I was the first to go. My baseline was dysfunctional in the extreme, but I had been doing well, for me. Anyhow, I got into this funk. My wife was working a couple jobs to keep us afloat. Some days when I was home alone, I would literally crawl into the closet and sit at the back of it with the door closed. I recall a day when my little brother came over. I was laying on the couch watching TV with a case of beer setting beside the couch. He came in and sat down and said “What are you watching?†I had no particular idea. I had just turned it on, but not bothered to figure out what was on. Just laying there staring at

whatever was on that channel.

“Why are you watching this?â€â€”I shrug. I asked Dave if he wants a beer. He says “Sure†and I reached into the box by the couch and handed him one. He looks at me and says "This is warm!"—I shrug. It just did not matter. Nothing mattered. Just laying there, smoking weed, drinking beer, counting the days, waiting for the end, but fearful it would just go on and on and on. I have not got that funky in years. But do I still have down times? Yep. Sometimes they stretch out a bit—maybe even weeks. But the funkiness is different—more permeable to things going on around me. I don't stop moving, and, even when in a funk, there are times when I get engaged in things I care about and liven up. Richness can permeate—at least some. The lows

and

stuck spots are somehow more flexible. There are some ups mixed in with the downs. Before it was dead flat...life was a dull draining monotone. No variation and nothing leaked in. The lows are less sticky—everything that happens does not seem to get folded into the funk. And they never seem to have the duration they used to have—though some still long. Why? Well, it all started the first day of June 1985. I said yes. I made a deal with the universe that whatever was on my plate on a given day, I would clean my plate and say thank

you. So if what was on my plate was depression....OK. If it was???.......OK. Not entirely coincidentally, the last drink or drug I had (except medical) was the last day in May 1985. Drinking and getting high were my major strategies for saying “No†to what life put on my plate (definitely not my only strategies, but major strategies). So the start was acceptance. And movement. I got up each day and to the best of my ability I did the next right thing. I went to work. I paid my bills. I paid my child support. I tried to do what a

citizen

would do—all new stuff for me. Gradually my activity increased, first work, then school, work, more school, more school, more school, and, life spread out before me. Engagement in life increased—broadened and deepened. I learned a little at a time to let go of what my head had to say to me about myself, my future, my possibilities, and the same for others. Instead, I started using my values as a guide, not my thoughts. I was watching a ph series called The Power of Myth ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Power_of_Myth ) on Public TV and was saying "follow your bliss." And, he very clearly did not mean hedonism. I spent a long, long time, and still do, inside questions generated watching that show. What would it mean for me to follow my bliss? What would my life look like, over time, if I were to do that? What would I do in the next day, morning, moment, that act would move me in that direction (even ever so slightly)? Will my next act move me in the direction of my values? Or away? If away, can I just let that go for another day? also talked at length about the hero’s journey. What might my own “hero’s journey†look like? What if I let myself dare to have what called a “hero’s journey?†(Even now, I shake a little with fear that it might sound pompous, presumptuous to call my own journey a hero’s journey, or to even imagine one.) Why has this changed over the years? 1. I have

practiced coming back to this moment, right now. Heaven knows I have had a lot of opportunities to practice having strayed from it so often (present moment).2. I have practiced staying more open to what I feel and think (acceptance) without attachment (defusion).3. I have practiced being in a continual process of authoring the direction my life is taking (values), and practiced letting go of rigid attachment to particular outcomes (defusion and acceptance).4. I have practice doing the next right thing (values and committed action).5. I have practiced noticing (self-as-context) that this practice has opened up possibilities that I would never in a million years been able to dream of prior to that choice, June 1, 1985. And, I have failed and I mean failed hard, hard, a lot, a lot, over the years, AND like the freakin' energizer bunny, I keep coming back to the practice. Sometimes sooner, sometimes later, but so far, I have come back one more time than I have gone away and this morning, this very morning, this very moment, I am declaring that practice to be enough...without justification, without consultation, without approval (including my own). I declare this practice to be enough. I expect my practice to change over

time. How? Can't say? Will it change? I would bet on that. But for this day....I am declaring International Enough Day. Here and now is enough. This practice, cracked and a bit leaky, is enough. I invite you all to imagine your own personal hero’s journey. I invite you to leave the end of the journey open to possibility. I invite you to let the tiniest act, this day, this morning, this moment, to be enough. my warm and good wishes to all in their practice—time for this one to head off to yoga,

G. 205 Peabody BuildingPsychology DepartmentUniversity of MississippiOxford, MS 38677ph: fax:

academic homepage:www.olemiss.edu/working/kwilson/kwilson.htmalso check outwww.onelifellc.comwww.mindfulnessfortwo.comwww.facebook.com/kellygwilsonwww.tastybehaviorism.comwww.abnormalwootwoot.com

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