Guest guest Posted April 10, 2011 Report Share Posted April 10, 2011 Pam - Both of your questions are about the ACT core process of acceptance. When we are confronted with our anxiety, our depression, most anything we don't want to have, we face a choice. Either we can struggle with what we don't want. That makes it worse. Or we can ACCEPT it and go on about our lives while making room for what we don't want. Accept is a tricky word. It does not mean we like what we accept no do we dislike it. For me it is an entirely neutral mental process. It just is what it is.The metaphor often used to help people understand acceptance is called the "uninvited aunt." Imagine that you are having a family gathering (life) and you hear a knock at your door. It's an aunt whom you dislike (anxiety) and whom you did not invite. It's clear she intends to stay. So you have a choice - invite her in, make her feel comfortable (make room for) and continue to enjoy the party. Or, try to make her go away (struggle with them), even though it is clear that won't work, and you will ruin the party in trying to get her to leave.It helps me to take a figurative step back and notice what's going on when I start struggling. That usually buys me time to become more accepting of the situation.Regarding the athlete you mentioned, they know that it does no good to struggle with the feelings of breathlessness. They know that the feelings will return the next time they run but are willing to make room for those consequences as part of living their valued life.Does that help?Bill> To: ACT_for_the_Public > Date: Sun, 10 Apr 2011 15:52:31 +0000> Subject: making space for..> > How does one apply practically or put into practice making space or room for anxiety, sensations? Allowing it to be there, how is that done?> In regards to anxious feelings or sensations, how would an athlete who has just worked out and is out of breath, heart beating fast, how do they deal with those sensations without becoming anxious, being conscious that is all going on?> > > > ------------------------------------> > For other ACT materials and list serves see www.contextualpsychology.org> > If you do not wish to belong to ACT_for_the_Public, you may > unsubscribe by sending an email to > ACT_for_the_Public-unsubscribe@...! Groups Links> > <*> To visit your group on the web, go to:> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ACT_for_the_Public/> > <*> Your email settings:> Individual Email | Traditional> > <*> To change settings online go to:> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ACT_for_the_Public/join> (Yahoo! ID required)> > <*> To change settings via email:> ACT_for_the_Public-digest > ACT_for_the_Public-fullfeatured > > <*> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 10, 2011 Report Share Posted April 10, 2011 Hi Bill, Yes, that does help, always easier said than done. Very hard not to react to that anxiety or resist or run/distract. It is such a completely different way of thinking and reacting. Thanks, Pam > > > Pam - Both of your questions are about the ACT core process of acceptance. When we are confronted with our anxiety, our depression, most anything we don't want to have, we face a choice. Either we can struggle with what we don't want. That makes it worse. Or we can ACCEPT it and go on about our lives while making room for what we don't want. Accept is a tricky word. It does not mean we like what we accept no do we dislike it. For me it is an entirely neutral mental process. It just is what it is. > The metaphor often used to help people understand acceptance is called the " uninvited aunt. " Imagine that you are having a family gathering (life) and you hear a knock at your door. It's an aunt whom you dislike (anxiety) and whom you did not invite. It's clear she intends to stay. So you have a choice - invite her in, make her feel comfortable (make room for) and continue to enjoy the party. Or, try to make her go away (struggle with them), even though it is clear that won't work, and you will ruin the party in trying to get her to leave. > It helps me to take a figurative step back and notice what's going on when I start struggling. That usually buys me time to become more accepting of the situation. > Regarding the athlete you mentioned, they know that it does no good to struggle with the feelings of breathlessness. They know that the feelings will return the next time they run but are willing to make room for those consequences as part of living their valued life. > Does that help? > Bill > > To: ACT_for_the_Public > > From: pam.smith44@... > > Date: Sun, 10 Apr 2011 15:52:31 +0000 > > Subject: making space for.. > > > > How does one apply practically or put into practice making space or room for anxiety, sensations? Allowing it to be there, how is that done? > > In regards to anxious feelings or sensations, how would an athlete who has just worked out and is out of breath, heart beating fast, how do they deal with those sensations without becoming anxious, being conscious that is all going on? > > > > > > > > ------------------------------------ > > > > For other ACT materials and list serves see www.contextualpsychology.org > > > > If you do not wish to belong to ACT_for_the_Public, you may > > unsubscribe by sending an email to > > ACT_for_the_Public-unsubscribe@...! Groups Links > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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