Re: After Christmas blues...

[Guest guest]

I am so sorry, Emma. You are not alone today. The country is full of let

down people. I feel fine, and happy, for which I am thankful.

I have learned that every time I wished hard for something or expected

something that didn't happen, I cried my eyes out, and was so disappointed, and

angry some times. What I have learned is to not expect. Flow with what is

happening, especially when we are caring for a LO. Yes, we are shut in, and

lonely

sometimes, but expecting more can only lead to frustration.

I am an outdoor person. I grew up on the S.W. Coast of Florida. I would love

to go back, but I can't, so I don't eat my heart out about it. I remember

the beauty and fun,

which fills my heart with gratitude that I was able to grow up that way.

Wipe your tears, dear, and feel my warm ((((((hug))))). You are love very

dearly.

Love a lot, it sure does a body good,

Imogene

In a message dated 12/26/2007 7:59:04 AM Central Standard Time,

emsyfay@... writes:

Is anyone else having those or is it just me? All of my planning and good

(what I thought

were good) ideas just didn't work out for me yesterday and I'm finding it

hard to keep my

eyes dry and my chin from wobbling today. Grandma and I did nothing but

fight yesterday

morning as I tried for the 8th day in a row to get her to brush her teeth to

no avail, my breaks

started making a horrid scraping sound on my way to my parents house, what I

thought was

a thoughtful gift to my step-dad of a letter campaign to raise funds to

donate to a research

organization for the cancer he has made him cry instead of making him happy,

after planning

the big family christmas gathering around grandma she insisted on leaving 10

minutes after

we got there so I didn't get to visit with anyone (it was too far away to go

back after taking

her home), when I got home my puppy had pooped all over the floor from the

stress of being

left alone so much for long periods over the last few days, and then she

growled at me when

I tried to pick her up to take her to bed. I had such big expectations and

now I feel so let

down! I keep going back and forth between feeling like I should just lower

my standards to

keep from getting let down and thinking that isn't fair and I shouldn't have

to do it. And the

phrase " Shit happens " keeps popping up in my head and making me angry. It

seems to

happen to me in a very literal way far too often for my liking.

Maybe I just needed to whine a little...thanks for listening (or reading as

the case may be!).

Emma

**************************************See AOL's top rated recipes

(http://food.aol.com/top-rated-recipes?NCID=aoltop00030000000004)

[Guest guest]

Id just like to add a hug from Michigan to the list thats going to Emma

today.Please know your being thought of and we understand how your feeling.And

please except my warmest best wishes for a brighter day.I havent been on much

lately so wanted to say hello to all and best wishes for the holidays and

upcoming new year.Your all very special to me here. Ron

Iward27663@... wrote:

I am so sorry, Emma. You are not alone today. The country is full of let

down people. I feel fine, and happy, for which I am thankful.

I have learned that every time I wished hard for something or expected

something that didn't happen, I cried my eyes out, and was so disappointed, and

angry some times. What I have learned is to not expect. Flow with what is

happening, especially when we are caring for a LO. Yes, we are shut in, and

lonely

sometimes, but expecting more can only lead to frustration.

I am an outdoor person. I grew up on the S.W. Coast of Florida. I would love

to go back, but I can't, so I don't eat my heart out about it. I remember

the beauty and fun,

which fills my heart with gratitude that I was able to grow up that way.

Wipe your tears, dear, and feel my warm ((((((hug))))). You are love very

dearly.

Love a lot, it sure does a body good,

Imogene

In a message dated 12/26/2007 7:59:04 AM Central Standard Time,

emsyfay@... writes:

Is anyone else having those or is it just me? All of my planning and good

(what I thought

were good) ideas just didn't work out for me yesterday and I'm finding it

hard to keep my

eyes dry and my chin from wobbling today. Grandma and I did nothing but

fight yesterday

morning as I tried for the 8th day in a row to get her to brush her teeth to

no avail, my breaks

started making a horrid scraping sound on my way to my parents house, what I

thought was

a thoughtful gift to my step-dad of a letter campaign to raise funds to

donate to a research

organization for the cancer he has made him cry instead of making him happy,

after planning

the big family christmas gathering around grandma she insisted on leaving 10

minutes after

we got there so I didn't get to visit with anyone (it was too far away to go

back after taking

her home), when I got home my puppy had pooped all over the floor from the

stress of being

left alone so much for long periods over the last few days, and then she

growled at me when

I tried to pick her up to take her to bed. I had such big expectations and

now I feel so let

down! I keep going back and forth between feeling like I should just lower

my standards to

keep from getting let down and thinking that isn't fair and I shouldn't have

to do it. And the

phrase " Shit happens " keeps popping up in my head and making me angry. It

seems to

happen to me in a very literal way far too often for my liking.

Maybe I just needed to whine a little...thanks for listening (or reading as

the case may be!).

Emma

**************************************See AOL's top rated recipes

(http://food.aol.com/top-rated-recipes?NCID=aoltop00030000000004)

[Guest guest]

This is the first Christmas I haven't had the blues in 50 years.

Because of all your support, I had NO EXPECTATIONS, not a one!

You guys gave me permission to be urked with the family, and then in

turn, I decided to do only what I felt like, and with your prayers I

rallied to do what I chose.

I did choose the high road, but it was on my terms. I didn't know no

one else was bringing anything, and that Jim volunteered for the

whole deal. He was going to get carry-out from a BBQ place.

I just allowed myself to do what the Spirit led me to do, and it was

easy. I cooked in stages, and it was all ready except baking the

biscuits as they walked through the door.

We had enough leftovers to get us through Christmas Day.

this is not the norm for me. I have come to hate Christams ever

since my mom died over 30 years ago.

I understand the letdown once the tree has no packages. It is not

about the gifts, but about the end of the commotion. the more we

throw ourselves into it, the bigger the letdown.

We did not have the time to put much into the get ready stage, and I

only put up a fiberoptic tree on the 23rd, with no ornaments. It is

a white tree and beautiful without anything but it's own light.

Millie got a flashlight and a sweater, and I haven't even given her

the bird feeder I got her yet. there wasn't the cleanup of all the

wrapping paper and hunting receipts.

I had no expectations whatsoever, and was so validated by you guys to

feel the way I did, that it went great for me.

The power of this group is amazing. Just " not beign invisible " is

the function I most need. You let me put it down, and you don't

judge.

My best revenge against the family was to " live well " . this is not

my normal approach, so I know i had spiritual help from within the

group.

So, rather than telling you I might be praying for all you letdown

guys, I will do it, and I will return the favor of the prayers i

received in trying to listen with my spirit.

I guess the most important thing is that you express what you feel,

and understand that feelings are neither right, nor wrong, they just

are. Remember, we are drained, tired, and frustrated. We are used

up, and whatever emotions hit us, are real. There is no stiff upper

lip, if we deny how we feel, we bury who we are. Explore the

feelings, and let them run their course so the new ones can emerge.

Saying what you feel like doing, is not actually doing it! Imagining

the people who do nothing standing in the snow in their underwear, is

not shoving them outside, it's an image to giggle at, and then move

on.

This is the site to regain whatever you need to face the job of

caregiving for one more day. This is the site for caregivers, and who

underatands us better than we do.

Where I am one day, I may not be the next. Today you may be reaching

out to me, and tomorrow I may be throwing you a lifeline of giggles,

or silly images.

I send you warm, bad breath manatee kisses. I send you sunshine and

light breezes.

You can throw all the dirty snowballs my way, and I will be fine.

So, let it begin. Vent away!

Carol

> I am so sorry, Emma. You are not alone today. The country is full

of let

> down people. I feel fine, and happy, for which I am thankful.

>

> I have learned that every time I wished hard for something or

expected

> something that didn't happen, I cried my eyes out, and was so

disappointed, and

> angry some times. What I have learned is to not expect. Flow with

what is

> happening, especially when we are caring for a LO. Yes, we are shut

in, and lonely

> sometimes, but expecting more can only lead to frustration.

>

> I am an outdoor person. I grew up on the S.W. Coast of Florida. I

would love

> to go back, but I can't, so I don't eat my heart out about it. I

remember

> the beauty and fun,

> which fills my heart with gratitude that I was able to grow up that

way.

>

> Wipe your tears, dear, and feel my warm ((((((hug))))). You are

love very

> dearly.

>

> Love a lot, it sure does a body good,

> Imogene

>

>

> In a message dated 12/26/2007 7:59:04 AM Central Standard Time,

> emsyfay@... writes:

>

> Is anyone else having those or is it just me? All of my planning

and good

> (what I thought

> were good) ideas just didn't work out for me yesterday and I'm

finding it

> hard to keep my

> eyes dry and my chin from wobbling today. Grandma and I did nothing

but

> fight yesterday

> morning as I tried for the 8th day in a row to get her to brush her

teeth to

> no avail, my breaks

> started making a horrid scraping sound on my way to my parents

house, what I

> thought was

> a thoughtful gift to my step-dad of a letter campaign to raise

funds to

> donate to a research

> organization for the cancer he has made him cry instead of making

him happy,

> after planning

> the big family christmas gathering around grandma she insisted on

leaving 10

> minutes after

> we got there so I didn't get to visit with anyone (it was too far

away to go

> back after taking

> her home), when I got home my puppy had pooped all over the floor

from the

> stress of being

> left alone so much for long periods over the last few days, and

then she

> growled at me when

> I tried to pick her up to take her to bed. I had such big

expectations and

> now I feel so let

> down! I keep going back and forth between feeling like I should

just lower

> my standards to

> keep from getting let down and thinking that isn't fair and I

shouldn't have

> to do it. And the

> phrase " Shit happens " keeps popping up in my head and making me

angry. It

> seems to

> happen to me in a very literal way far too often for my liking.

> Maybe I just needed to whine a little...thanks for listening (or

reading as

> the case may be!).

> Emma

>

> **************************************See AOL's top rated recipes

> (http://food.aol.com/top-rated-recipes?NCID=aoltop00030000000004)

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Emma, i used to feel like this at christmas and as Sandie says it seemed to

last over a few days then i'd feel fine again. New year would hit and at the

bells i would be in floods of tears...i hated this time of year, still do hate

new year! But all that changed two years ago as i was rushing around last minute

as usual and my youngest son had been unwell for a few days. He was only

twelve, we awoke in the early hours of christmas eve to the sound of him

vomiting, when i got to him he was in a terrible mess and had blood over him.

He'd been vomiting up blood with such force that it was in the bath tub too. We

spent the entire day in hospital with him while he was put on a drip and given

lots of medication to try and help him, he looked so ill. I still had present to

buy and wrap and we were eventually allowed to take him home late at night

providing we dialled 999 if he vomited again. The upshot was that we spent

christmas day lounging about in our jim jams looking after and do you

know i finally realised that this time of year was about everything else but the

things we rush about doing all of December. I had the best christmas ever just

sitting at home with my family.......I decided that i would always try to enjoy

it no matter what because come January the bills will fall through the door,

we'll have less money, it'll snow and there's always some sort of crap waiting

for you then!! You'll look back at the end of next year at this christmas and

just laugh at the calamity that was this christmas!!

.xx

After Christmas blues...

Is anyone else having those or is it just me? All of my planning and good

(what I thought

were good) ideas just didn't work out for me yesterday and I'm finding it hard

to keep my

eyes dry and my chin from wobbling today. Grandma and I did nothing but fight

yesterday

morning as I tried for the 8th day in a row to get her to brush her teeth to

no avail, my breaks

started making a horrid scraping sound on my way to my parents house, what I

thought was

a thoughtful gift to my step-dad of a letter campaign to raise funds to donate

to a research

organization for the cancer he has made him cry instead of making him happy,

after planning

the big family christmas gathering around grandma she insisted on leaving 10

minutes after

we got there so I didn't get to visit with anyone (it was too far away to go

back after taking

her home), when I got home my puppy had pooped all over the floor from the

stress of being

left alone so much for long periods over the last few days, and then she

growled at me when

I tried to pick her up to take her to bed. I had such big expectations and now

I feel so let

down! I keep going back and forth between feeling like I should just lower my

standards to

keep from getting let down and thinking that isn't fair and I shouldn't have

to do it. And the

phrase " Shit happens " keeps popping up in my head and making me angry. It

seems to

happen to me in a very literal way far too often for my liking.

Maybe I just needed to whine a little...thanks for listening (or reading as

the case may be!).

Emma

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20:04

[Guest guest]

thanks much amanda!!!

xo

After Christmas blues...

Is anyone else having those or is it just me? All of my planning and good (what

I thought

were good) ideas just didn't work out for me yesterday and I'm finding it hard

to keep my

eyes dry and my chin from wobbling today. Grandma and I did nothing but fight

yesterday

morning as I tried for the 8th day in a row to get her to brush her teeth to

no avail, my breaks

started making a horrid scraping sound on my way to my parents house, what I

thought was

a thoughtful gift to my step-dad of a letter campaign to raise funds to donate

to a research

organization for the cancer he has made him cry instead of making him happy,

after planning

the big family christmas gathering around grandma she insisted on leaving 10

minutes after

we got there so I didn't get to visit with anyone (it was too far away to go

back after taking

her home), when I got home my puppy had pooped all over the floor from the

stress of being

left alone so much for long periods over the last few days, and then she

growled at me when

I tried to pick her up to take her to bed. I had such big expectations and now

I feel so let

down! I keep going back and forth between feeling like I should just lower my

standards to

keep from getting let down and thinking that isn't fair and I shouldn't have

to do it. And the

phrase " Shit happens " keeps popping up in my head and making me angry. It

seems to

happen to me in a very literal way far too often for my liking.

Maybe I just needed to whine a little...thanks for listening (or reading as

the case may be!).

Emma

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -

No virus found in this incoming message.

Checked by AVG Free Edition.

Version: 7.5.516 / Virus Database: 269.17.9/1197 - Release Date: 25/12/2007

20:04