Re: my dad is in crisis/Dianne

[Guest guest]

Hi Dianne,

It sounds like your dad is going to get some adjustments or as I've heard them

say here working on the right cocktail mix. I hope it all works out well. I read

Robin Riddle's post and she has heard that the psych placements for the people

that she has talked to were all positive experiences for their Loved Ones.

I believe most of us here can say exactly as you, that our Loved Ones would

have never had done these things if they were in their right mind. My husband

was a very gentle loving man. If he could be in his right mind and see himself

and how he is now, he would be appalled at his behaviors. It is totally Lewy

Body causing these behaviors.

I hope that you can find a way to keep your dad at home. It sounds like you

are very supportive and it takes a lot of family support to keep a Loved One at

home, it is very waring and dangerous at times to go the road alone. I could not

handle my husband 24/7 by myself anymore. I had a caregiver come for a few hours

to give me relief and also my husband was in a Day Program, but I could not

afford to do it around the clock and I have no family support. I am all he has

as a caregiver. I bring him home for the weekends and he is here with me from

Saturday - Monday. It works out perfect for me to have him home for that amount

of time, because I can handle it, but if he should become extremely combative

with me, I would have no problem to send him back to the nh before Monday

arrived.

As long as he is somewhat cooperative it works out and he mostly is, but at

times the ugly beast of LBD rears it's ugly head. I had him home on Thursday -

Saturday last week, because I was out on Mother's Day on Sunday. I ended up

taking him to ER, because he was becoming combative and extremely confused and

it usually is a sign of a UTI, Pneumonia or Diverticulitis with him. So, I had

everything tested, but nothing could be found. It's just the roller coaster of

LBD and it's odd behaviors that show up. I am with him everyday at the nursing

home inbetween his stays at home. I stay at the nh for around 8 hours everyday.

I am there for Jim's dinner hour and until he goes to bed. I am the last one he

sees at night. I put him to bed. I play a big part in his care still and the nh

allows me to do it. I toilet him and change him and I am the one that gets him

into bed at the nh. I brush his teeth and shave him everynight, because the CNA

in the morning does not know how to

shave him without pulling on his wiskers and hurting him and he hates her to do

it and gets combative with her. I said I will do it and I like to be involved

with him anyway. It is not by choice that I put him in a nh, but by necessity

for my well- being too and if he gets combative with me, I have the people there

to help me with him. It has worked out for us this way, but home is always best

and if you can keep your Loved One at home that's wonderful!

I am glad you got the lock box for safety. I even placed the kitchen knives

and everything I could think of that could be used as a weapon out of his sight.

I posted about finding a noose and a knife under our bed accidently while

vacuuming. After that, I checked in every drawer under his clothes and in the

closets in pockets and in shoes, Anywhere I could think of I checked for weapons

hidden. It's funny, because when I checked the shoes, I found $100.00 in the toe

of an old shoe from when he was allowed to have money, but he started to hoard

it away and now I found it! It was my lucky day.

I hope it all goes well for your dad and he will be home soon and that your

mom can get some rest while he is being adjusted with his meds.............Jan

Dianne wrote:

Jan,

Thanks for your help. My dad would never have pushed

or pulled on my mom if he had been in his right mind.

I know that this was a case of Lewy body taking over.

We are concerned about having him return to the house

at some point in time though, because of my mom's

safety. He'll be in a psych placement or a nursing

home while they adjust his Depakote which is what the

neuro chose for starters (and Exelon later on I hope),

so won't be returning for a while. I'm thinking that

we'll have to have some type of assistance for her

when/if he does come home. I don't know if we can get

by with a caregiver at night (maybe from 6 or 7 til

12) because that's when he gets the most upset, or if

we need to go with round the clock help. That's

something we'll work out with the case worker and the

neuro doc, I guess.

I know that your husband was violent and you finally

had to place him in a nh, but I can't really wrap my

mind about the idea that he will never come home to

live again. We'd like to have him back at home--but

the first priority is Mom's safety (we live about 3

hours away and my mom is his sole caregiver). We are

getting a lock box for all knives and scissors before

he comes back to remove those from his sight.

We'll just have to take it one day at a time.

--- Janet Colello wrote:

> Hi Diane,

> My husband has had these episodes and they can be

> dangerous to others. He once twisted my wrist so

> badly in one of his delusional episodes that I

> thought he was going to break it. My entire arm was

> black and blue the next day. He also has given me a

> black eye, because I didn't duck fast enough.

> When this happened in the hospital they had to

> restrain him, so he wouldn't hurt the nurses and

> others. They gave him at that time Aricept and

> Seroquel. This was several years ago. He was

> delusional that we were all in a conspiracy together

> and out to get him. I have taken him off of the

> Aricept, but he has always remained on the Seroquel.

> Seroquel works great in calming my husband. He only

> has one Seroquel in the daytime. He gets very sleepy

> from Seroquel and I don't want him drugged all day.

> He takes 3 Seroquel before bedtime and he sleeps all

> through the night. Many are on a greater dosage than

> my husband. When he is really aggressive he does get

> an extra dose in the daytime to keep him calm.

> If your dad goes into Psych Placement make sure

> they know not to give him Ativan or Haldol. These

> will set him back for life! He can have adverse

> reactions from these. They gave my husband Haldol in

> the hospital once when I requested not to give it,

> but a shift of doctors did not get the message and I

> almost lost him from a sever reaction to the

> medication. Doctors seem to be understanding more

> than they did several years ago. I have never had

> the experience of my husband being in a Psych

> Placement, so I can not tell you from that point of

> view. Seroquel has worked very well for my husband,

> but as you have noticed all Loved Ones react

> differently to medications and what works for one

> does not always work for another.

> I hope you hear from more people with your type

> of situation soon.

> You and your family are in my thoughts and

> prayers.

> Stay Strong....................Jan

>

>

>

>

> cadysgran wrote:

> I'm writing this from my daughter-in-law's

> computer because we're in

> Orlando dealing with a crisis with my dad (Bill, who

> was diagnosed

> with LBD in 2003). On Monday night my mom called and

> he had tried

> to get her to go to bed after a TV show had ended.

> He went to bed

> fully clothed and she called me afraid because he

> was " acting

> strange " and unlike himself. I told her that she

> should probably

> just let him be, no confrontations or questions.

> While we were on

> the phone, Dad came out of the bedroom, grabbed her,

> shook her and

> marched her in the bedroom where he pushed her down

> on the bed and

> covered her up. I was listening to all of this on

> the phone and got

> on my cell, called my son also in Orlando and asked

> him to call

> 911. The police finally arrived and they called EMS

> who took him

> to the emergency room. Yesterday we drove to Orlando

> not quite

> knowing what to expect. The doctor who is the

> " general " doc

> contacted Dad's neuro doc who suggested changing his

> Aricept which

> he'd been on for about 3 1/2 years to Exelon. He

> also wanted to add

> Seroquel. All I've read on this site is to only mess

> with one drug

> at the time--so I need help there. And I know

> Seroquel works with

> some LBD people but not all--so I need help there as

> well. Then

> this morning, the on call neuro who'd been observing

> Dad all night

> called and told me that Dad had undone his

> restraint, gone over to

> the bed of the guy in the room with him and tried to

> undo his IVs.

> He recommended that while we were " tweaking " Dad's

> meds that perhaps

> a " short term psych placement " would be the best

> thing for him.

> That threw me into a tailspin because I remember

> reading on here

> that psych placements for other's LOs had been such

> a nightmare. I

> won't have computer access this afternoon, but will

> be able to check

> my email tonight at my son's house. I would really

> appreciate any

> insight/advice you can give. I'm hanging on to you

> all like a

> lifeline.

> Much gratitude-

> Dianne P

> daughter of Bill, 83

>

>

>

> Welcome to LBDcaregivers.

>

>

>