We are just watching Millie breathe.

March 3, 2008

Millie continues to fight. she is so drained and yet even at 8:00 a.m.

she let us know she had to pee! Apparently, she has decided not to

ever be classified as incontinent. As long as she can indicate her

need to go, we will get her out of bed. Every hoisting takes something

out of her, and output is far, far greater than input.

She can still bear her own weight to be pivoted for the commode. I

hope I can go out with the determination this lady has.

I guess Millie and the Lewy Bodies jointly decided how this would end.

Once she started lossing interest in food, and then refusing actively,

we have been coasting toward the station.

It is awful to watch her chest rise and fall, and she can still lift

her torso up and look about the room.

We have left the room as dark as possible and are not talking, in order

for her to have some privavy.

She cannot seem to get comfortable. she repositions herself often, at

great expesnse of precious energy.

She just sat up and reached out for me. I sat on the bed to get close

and she pulled me down. she scooted over to the far side of the bed

and pulled me down til i was lying next to her and cradling her head.

this was one of the first times she has closed her eyes.

I prayed in her ear and gave her permission to go to God.

She seemed so content to be someone's child.

her son came in and I got up so he could be next to his mom. I left

the room to give him some time with his mom.

When I got back he was back in his chair and his mom was wide-eyed in

the bed.

If she could just leave peacefully, but i know that last step must be

rather scary.

I called my daughter-in-law to tell her of the tender moment that

Millie had iniated.

Her eyes are closed but she is restless.

What a solitary journey.

My best friend is covering my classes and so I am good until Wednesday

if need be.

You guys who have direct lines to God, please pray on Millie's behalf.

She deserves a non-Lewy Body, and there is only ne place I know where

you can get one of those.

I can't imagine they have the Lewy Coster in heaven. I am thinking it

is probably a ride more in line with the depths of hell.

Carol

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