Re: Falling, Going Downhill, Waiting to Die and Donate her Brain

[Guest guest]

: Sorry to hear about your mother's condition.

It is so horrible, one can't wish for her to continue

for a long time.

As for making arrangements at the end, just contact

the mortuary that is going to take care of her, and

they will make the arrangements for taking the body to

whoever is going to retrieve the brain. That is all I

had to do, anyway, and the mortuary transports the

body there and then picks it back up when the autopsy

is done.

Sorry to sound so morbid, but you do need to have

things in place before anything happens. There are

too many other things to do when that time comes.

I do hope she can pass peacfully when the time comes.

--- Gurganus

wrote:

> My mother started falling around 2001 the best we

> can remember.

> Sometimes she felt as if she were being shot out of

> a gun, hurtling

> her halfway across a room till she ended up in a

> corner. Her

> dementia worsened till she had to be moved into a

> facility, and we

> have tried different facilities, interspersed with

> her living with me

> for a while. It finally got to where I was getting

> no sleep, and she

> was falling every time my back was turned.

>

> One facility tried confining her to a wheel chair

> with a " lap buddy "

> holding her in. She hated that. Now she is in a

> dementia unit, and

> we have been letting her walk, but now she is

> falling on the average

> once or twice a day! She wears padding to protect

> her hips. She is

> bruised all over but has no broken bones yet. She

> hurts so much and

> is afraid of further falls but still tries to get up

> and walk, as she

> has been active all her life. A wheel chair is

> painful for her --

> bad curviture of the spine. What to do??

>

> The doctor who diagnosed her with LBD says she can't

> last many more

> months because she has gone downhill so much, yet

> her blood tests

> show a normal blood count, liver, kidney, thyroid,

> etc. All my mom

> wants to do is die peacefully so she can go home to

> the Lord, and the

> sooner the better. I feel so bad for her. She has

> advanced macular

> degeneration and can barely see to eat, yet they

> never put her

> glasses on her, and most of the time we can't even

> find her glasses

> when I am there. That really makes me mad. She is

> also very hard of

> hearing. Her voice is so weak most of the time that

> I have to put my

> ear next to her mouth and still often cannot

> understand her. She is

> sweet -- never an unkind word, and always

> appreciative of everything

> I do for her. She can't sleep well and has terrible

>

> dreams/hallucinations that my brother in Indiana is

> there and is mad

> at her and cusses her out. Every time I see her I

> have to convince

> her again that he hasn't been there and would never

> do that to her,

> so she can stop worrying about him for a while.

> (She knows she has

> nightmares/hallucinations, so that helps.) Her

> favorite activity any

> more is just to go riding, so that's what we do.

>

> She is excited about donating her brain to the

> Harvard Brain Bank.

> We are in the process of trying to find out who to

> get locally to

> remove the brain and prepare it for shipping once

> she dies. It is so

> strange to be thinking this way, but will you all

> help me to pray for

> her that she will die peacefully and relatively

> soon? (Maybe in

> November, after we get all our ducks in a a row and

> after my brother

> is able to come down and visit her one more time.)

>

> Thank you for listening,

> G

>

>

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

Check out the hottest 2008 models today at Yahoo! Autos.

http://autos.yahoo.com/new_cars.html

[Guest guest]

Consider it done . Sometimes the things we pray for may seem highly

unusual for those not in this situation but we know what you mean.

Best to you both,

Courage

Falling, Going Downhill, Waiting to Die and Donate

her Brain

My mother started falling around 2001 the best we can remember.

Sometimes she felt as if she were being shot out of a gun, hurtling

her halfway across a room till she ended up in a corner. Her

dementia worsened till she had to be moved into a facility, and we

have tried different facilities, interspersed with her living with me

for a while. It finally got to where I was getting no sleep, and she

was falling every time my back was turned.

One facility tried confining her to a wheel chair with a " lap buddy "

holding her in. She hated that. Now she is in a dementia unit, and

we have been letting her walk, but now she is falling on the average

once or twice a day! She wears padding to protect her hips. She is

bruised all over but has no broken bones yet. She hurts so much and

is afraid of further falls but still tries to get up and walk, as she

has been active all her life. A wheel chair is painful for her --

bad curviture of the spine. What to do??

The doctor who diagnosed her with LBD says she can't last many more

months because she has gone downhill so much, yet her blood tests

show a normal blood count, liver, kidney, thyroid, etc. All my mom

wants to do is die peacefully so she can go home to the Lord, and the

sooner the better. I feel so bad for her. She has advanced macular

degeneration and can barely see to eat, yet they never put her

glasses on her, and most of the time we can't even find her glasses

when I am there. That really makes me mad. She is also very hard of

hearing. Her voice is so weak most of the time that I have to put my

ear next to her mouth and still often cannot understand her. She is

sweet -- never an unkind word, and always appreciative of everything

I do for her. She can't sleep well and has terrible

dreams/hallucinations that my brother in Indiana is there and is mad

at her and cusses her out. Every time I see her I have to convince

her again that he hasn't been there and would never do that to her,

so she can stop worrying about him for a while. (She knows she has

nightmares/hallucinations, so that helps.) Her favorite activity any

more is just to go riding, so that's what we do.

She is excited about donating her brain to the Harvard Brain Bank.

We are in the process of trying to find out who to get locally to

remove the brain and prepare it for shipping once she dies. It is so

strange to be thinking this way, but will you all help me to pray for

her that she will die peacefully and relatively soon? (Maybe in

November, after we get all our ducks in a a row and after my brother

is able to come down and visit her one more time.)

Thank you for listening,

G

[Guest guest]

Dear ,

Your mom is in my prayers indeed! And you, too. What a loving daughter youare.

Peace, Lin

gaat wrote:

Consider it done . Sometimes the things we pray for may seem highly

unusual for those not in this situation but we know what you mean.

Best to you both,

Courage

Falling, Going Downhill, Waiting to Die and Donate her

Brain

My mother started falling around 2001 the best we can remember.

Sometimes she felt as if she were being shot out of a gun, hurtling

her halfway across a room till she ended up in a corner. Her

dementia worsened till she had to be moved into a facility, and we

have tried different facilities, interspersed with her living with me

for a while. It finally got to where I was getting no sleep, and she

was falling every time my back was turned.

One facility tried confining her to a wheel chair with a " lap buddy "

holding her in. She hated that. Now she is in a dementia unit, and

we have been letting her walk, but now she is falling on the average

once or twice a day! She wears padding to protect her hips. She is

bruised all over but has no broken bones yet. She hurts so much and

is afraid of further falls but still tries to get up and walk, as she

has been active all her life. A wheel chair is painful for her --

bad curviture of the spine. What to do??

The doctor who diagnosed her with LBD says she can't last many more

months because she has gone downhill so much, yet her blood tests

show a normal blood count, liver, kidney, thyroid, etc. All my mom

wants to do is die peacefully so she can go home to the Lord, and the

sooner the better. I feel so bad for her. She has advanced macular

degeneration and can barely see to eat, yet they never put her

glasses on her, and most of the time we can't even find her glasses

when I am there. That really makes me mad. She is also very hard of

hearing. Her voice is so weak most of the time that I have to put my

ear next to her mouth and still often cannot understand her. She is

sweet -- never an unkind word, and always appreciative of everything

I do for her. She can't sleep well and has terrible

dreams/hallucinations that my brother in Indiana is there and is mad

at her and cusses her out. Every time I see her I have to convince

her again that he hasn't been there and would never do that to her,

so she can stop worrying about him for a while. (She knows she has

nightmares/hallucinations, so that helps.) Her favorite activity any

more is just to go riding, so that's what we do.

She is excited about donating her brain to the Harvard Brain Bank.

We are in the process of trying to find out who to get locally to

remove the brain and prepare it for shipping once she dies. It is so

strange to be thinking this way, but will you all help me to pray for

her that she will die peacefully and relatively soon? (Maybe in

November, after we get all our ducks in a a row and after my brother

is able to come down and visit her one more time.)

Thank you for listening,

G

[Guest guest]

-- I am going to pray for your mom.

How awful for her to be falling like that all the time.

THe nursing home my mom is in has her in a geri chair. Since your mom doesn't

like the wheel chair, she probably would not like a geri chair either, right?

Warmest regards,

Kim

" There is no such thing in anyone's life as an unimportant day. " (

Woollcott)

---------------------------------

Yahoo! oneSearch: Finally, mobile search that gives answers, not web links.

[Guest guest]

Thank you for the recommendation. I did as you recommended, and

between the local mortician and the folks at the Harvard brain bank

(1-800-brainbank) a pathologist has been contacted, and all

arrangements have been made.

We also think we have found out who the guy is who cusses her out

during the night. It's her roommate, who has a deep voice, and is

very impatient with anyone who does anything that doesn't make sense

to her. We also have a problem with a male med tech who has very

little patience and talks mean to patients. I have witnessed him

saying very inappropriate things to other patients, and I plan to

report him.

>

> > My mother started falling around 2001 the best we

> > can remember.

> > Sometimes she felt as if she were being shot out of

> > a gun, hurtling

> > her halfway across a room till she ended up in a

> > corner. Her

> > dementia worsened till she had to be moved into a

> > facility, and we

> > have tried different facilities, interspersed with

> > her living with me

> > for a while. It finally got to where I was getting

> > no sleep, and she

> > was falling every time my back was turned.

> >

> > One facility tried confining her to a wheel chair

> > with a " lap buddy "

> > holding her in. She hated that. Now she is in a

> > dementia unit, and

> > we have been letting her walk, but now she is

> > falling on the average

> > once or twice a day! She wears padding to protect

> > her hips. She is

> > bruised all over but has no broken bones yet. She

> > hurts so much and

> > is afraid of further falls but still tries to get up

> > and walk, as she

> > has been active all her life. A wheel chair is

> > painful for her --

> > bad curviture of the spine. What to do??

> >

> > The doctor who diagnosed her with LBD says she can't

> > last many more

> > months because she has gone downhill so much, yet

> > her blood tests

> > show a normal blood count, liver, kidney, thyroid,

> > etc. All my mom

> > wants to do is die peacefully so she can go home to

> > the Lord, and the

> > sooner the better. I feel so bad for her. She has

> > advanced macular

> > degeneration and can barely see to eat, yet they

> > never put her

> > glasses on her, and most of the time we can't even

> > find her glasses

> > when I am there. That really makes me mad. She is

> > also very hard of

> > hearing. Her voice is so weak most of the time that

> > I have to put my

> > ear next to her mouth and still often cannot

> > understand her. She is

> > sweet -- never an unkind word, and always

> > appreciative of everything

> > I do for her. She can't sleep well and has terrible

> >

> > dreams/hallucinations that my brother in Indiana is

> > there and is mad

> > at her and cusses her out. Every time I see her I

> > have to convince

> > her again that he hasn't been there and would never

> > do that to her,

> > so she can stop worrying about him for a while.

> > (She knows she has

> > nightmares/hallucinations, so that helps.) Her

> > favorite activity any

> > more is just to go riding, so that's what we do.

> >

> > She is excited about donating her brain to the

> > Harvard Brain Bank.

> > We are in the process of trying to find out who to

> > get locally to

> > remove the brain and prepare it for shipping once

> > she dies. It is so

> > strange to be thinking this way, but will you all

> > help me to pray for

> > her that she will die peacefully and relatively

> > soon? (Maybe in

> > November, after we get all our ducks in a a row and

> > after my brother

> > is able to come down and visit her one more time.)

> >

> > Thank you for listening,

> > G

> >

> >

>

>

>

>

______________________________________________________________________

______________

> Check out the hottest 2008 models today at Yahoo! Autos.

> http://autos.yahoo.com/new_cars.html

>

[Guest guest]

Donna,

Someone else wrote to me that what you were suggesting is a merry-

walker. After my post, I found out the PT was trying one with her.

She hates it, but it is a definite improvement. I am encouraging her

to use it. Since they started it with her full time, she has only

fallen once, and that was at lunch when, of course, she wasn't in it.

G

>

> ,

>

> Your message struck me so. Mom has been gone for 5 years but one

of the stories she use to tell that I never understood, you are just

talking about. And it is the first time I have heard it.

>

> Mom talks about the time she was on the phone and was " struck by

lighting. " She lived in WI and I lived in MI and it was one of the

first falls she ever told me about. While I had some doubts about

what had happen, I had no way of knowing.

>

> It certainly sound like what you are talking about your

Mom " getting shot out of a gun. " Mom had several falls that I

didn't pay enough attention to when I first started to realize she

had problems. Her famous quote was " I know how to fall. "

>

> There was always an explanation, she took out the garbage and it

was icy. she tripped over the curb on the way to the bank, and I

think a lot she didn't tell me about.

>

> This is the first time I have heard the " shot out of the gun " and

it sound just like Mom's " got hit by lightening. "

>

> There is an aid and I will try and see if I can see what it is

called. Someone here might know what I am talking about. It is

something that surrounds her and has a seat, I think, and has a frame

built out of pipe that is built up so she has something to hold on

to. I don't know what it is called but I have seen people use them

and it would be better than broken bones. And it isn't a wheel

chair. It sort of works like the walker that babies are in but not

so constrained and built up around her.

>

> Hugs,

>

>

> Donna R

>

> Caregave for Mom (after I brought her from WI to MI) for 3 years

and 4th year in a nh.

> She was almost 89 when she died in '02. No dx other than mine.

>

>

> Falling, Going Downhill, Waiting to Die

and Donate her Brain

>

> My mother started falling around 2001 the best we can remember.

> Sometimes she felt as if she were being shot out of a gun, hurtling

> her halfway across a room till she ended up in a corner. Her

> dementia worsened till she had to be moved into a facility, and we

> have tried different facilities, interspersed with her living with

me

> for a while. It finally got to where I was getting no sleep, and

she

> was falling every time my back was turned.

>

> One facility tried confining her to a wheel chair with a " lap

buddy "

> holding her in. She hated that. Now she is in a dementia unit,

and

> we have been letting her walk, but now she is falling on the

average

> once or twice a day! She wears padding to protect her hips. She

is

> bruised all over but has no broken bones yet. She hurts so much

and

> is afraid of further falls but still tries to get up and walk, as

she

> has been active all her life. A wheel chair is painful for her --

> bad curviture of the spine. What to do??

>

> The doctor who diagnosed her with LBD says she can't last many more

> months because she has gone downhill so much, yet her blood tests

> show a normal blood count, liver, kidney, thyroid, etc. All my mom

> wants to do is die peacefully so she can go home to the Lord, and

the

> sooner the better. I feel so bad for her. She has advanced

macular

> degeneration and can barely see to eat, yet they never put her

> glasses on her, and most of the time we can't even find her glasses

> when I am there. That really makes me mad. She is also very hard

of

> hearing. Her voice is so weak most of the time that I have to put

my

> ear next to her mouth and still often cannot understand her. She

is

> sweet -- never an unkind word, and always appreciative of

everything

> I do for her. She can't sleep well and has terrible

> dreams/hallucinations that my brother in Indiana is there and is

mad

> at her and cusses her out. Every time I see her I have to convince

> her again that he hasn't been there and would never do that to her,

> so she can stop worrying about him for a while. (She knows she has

> nightmares/hallucinations, so that helps.) Her favorite activity

any

> more is just to go riding, so that's what we do.

>

> She is excited about donating her brain to the Harvard Brain Bank.

> We are in the process of trying to find out who to get locally to

> remove the brain and prepare it for shipping once she dies. It is

so

> strange to be thinking this way, but will you all help me to pray

for

> her that she will die peacefully and relatively soon? (Maybe in

> November, after we get all our ducks in a a row and after my

brother

> is able to come down and visit her one more time.)

>

> Thank you for listening,

> G

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Dear ,

This is good news. Your own search re-inspired me, too, so I send a special

thank you your way.

Some folks here know I work in a senior care organization, with several

residential communities, including ALFs and SNFs. As daughter of mom with LBD -

and from my work perspective - I'm glad you plan to report the nasty tech. There

is absolutely NEVER an excuse for anything but the most professional, respectful

and caring behavior - demonstrated to residents and their guests. EVER! The

frequent experiences of folks in our group here with rude and worse staff is

sickening to hear about - and to go through. So you will be doing everyone a

huge favor by insisting on good conduct. And the site should be grateful to hear

from you.

I'd be interested in how that goes. Thanks so much again for this special

message.

Lin

Gurganus wrote:

Thank you for the recommendation. I did as you recommended, and

between the local mortician and the folks at the Harvard brain bank

(1-800-brainbank) a pathologist has been contacted, and all

arrangements have been made.

We also think we have found out who the guy is who cusses her out

during the night. It's her roommate, who has a deep voice, and is

very impatient with anyone who does anything that doesn't make sense

to her. We also have a problem with a male med tech who has very

little patience and talks mean to patients. I have witnessed him

saying very inappropriate things to other patients, and I plan to

report him.

>

> > My mother started falling around 2001 the best we

> > can remember.

> > Sometimes she felt as if she were being shot out of

> > a gun, hurtling

> > her halfway across a room till she ended up in a

> > corner. Her

> > dementia worsened till she had to be moved into a

> > facility, and we

> > have tried different facilities, interspersed with

> > her living with me

> > for a while. It finally got to where I was getting

> > no sleep, and she

> > was falling every time my back was turned.

> >

> > One facility tried confining her to a wheel chair

> > with a " lap buddy "

> > holding her in. She hated that. Now she is in a

> > dementia unit, and

> > we have been letting her walk, but now she is

> > falling on the average

> > once or twice a day! She wears padding to protect

> > her hips. She is

> > bruised all over but has no broken bones yet. She

> > hurts so much and

> > is afraid of further falls but still tries to get up

> > and walk, as she

> > has been active all her life. A wheel chair is

> > painful for her --

> > bad curviture of the spine. What to do??

> >

> > The doctor who diagnosed her with LBD says she can't

> > last many more

> > months because she has gone downhill so much, yet

> > her blood tests

> > show a normal blood count, liver, kidney, thyroid,

> > etc. All my mom

> > wants to do is die peacefully so she can go home to

> > the Lord, and the

> > sooner the better. I feel so bad for her. She has

> > advanced macular

> > degeneration and can barely see to eat, yet they

> > never put her

> > glasses on her, and most of the time we can't even

> > find her glasses

> > when I am there. That really makes me mad. She is

> > also very hard of

> > hearing. Her voice is so weak most of the time that

> > I have to put my

> > ear next to her mouth and still often cannot

> > understand her. She is

> > sweet -- never an unkind word, and always

> > appreciative of everything

> > I do for her. She can't sleep well and has terrible

> >

> > dreams/hallucinations that my brother in Indiana is

> > there and is mad

> > at her and cusses her out. Every time I see her I

> > have to convince

> > her again that he hasn't been there and would never

> > do that to her,

> > so she can stop worrying about him for a while.

> > (She knows she has

> > nightmares/hallucinations, so that helps.) Her

> > favorite activity any

> > more is just to go riding, so that's what we do.

> >

> > She is excited about donating her brain to the

> > Harvard Brain Bank.

> > We are in the process of trying to find out who to

> > get locally to

> > remove the brain and prepare it for shipping once

> > she dies. It is so

> > strange to be thinking this way, but will you all

> > help me to pray for

> > her that she will die peacefully and relatively

> > soon? (Maybe in

> > November, after we get all our ducks in a a row and

> > after my brother

> > is able to come down and visit her one more time.)

> >

> > Thank you for listening,

> > G

> >

> >

>

>

>

>

______________________________________________________________________

______________

> Check out the hottest 2008 models today at Yahoo! Autos.

> http://autos.yahoo.com/new_cars.html

>

Welcome to LBDcaregivers.

[Guest guest]

I'm glad that worked out for you, and it will give you

fewer things to think about as you face the

inevitable.

Yes, you certainly should report the aide, as that is

the only way anyone will know what is going on.

Good luck as you travel down this horrible road.

--- Gurganus

wrote:

> Thank you for the recommendation. I did as you

> recommended, and

> between the local mortician and the folks at the

> Harvard brain bank

> (1-800-brainbank) a pathologist has been contacted,

> and all

> arrangements have been made.

>

> We also think we have found out who the guy is who

> cusses her out

> during the night. It's her roommate, who has a deep

> voice, and is

> very impatient with anyone who does anything that

> doesn't make sense

> to her. We also have a problem with a male med tech

> who has very

> little patience and talks mean to patients. I have

> witnessed him

> saying very inappropriate things to other patients,

> and I plan to

> report him.

>

>

>

>

> >

> > > My mother started falling around 2001 the best

> we

> > > can remember.

> > > Sometimes she felt as if she were being shot out

> of

> > > a gun, hurtling

> > > her halfway across a room till she ended up in a

> > > corner. Her

> > > dementia worsened till she had to be moved into

> a

> > > facility, and we

> > > have tried different facilities, interspersed

> with

> > > her living with me

> > > for a while. It finally got to where I was

> getting

> > > no sleep, and she

> > > was falling every time my back was turned.

> > >

> > > One facility tried confining her to a wheel

> chair

> > > with a " lap buddy "

> > > holding her in. She hated that. Now she is in

> a

> > > dementia unit, and

> > > we have been letting her walk, but now she is

> > > falling on the average

> > > once or twice a day! She wears padding to

> protect

> > > her hips. She is

> > > bruised all over but has no broken bones yet.

> She

> > > hurts so much and

> > > is afraid of further falls but still tries to

> get up

> > > and walk, as she

> > > has been active all her life. A wheel chair is

> > > painful for her --

> > > bad curviture of the spine. What to do??

> > >

> > > The doctor who diagnosed her with LBD says she

> can't

> > > last many more

> > > months because she has gone downhill so much,

> yet

> > > her blood tests

> > > show a normal blood count, liver, kidney,

> thyroid,

> > > etc. All my mom

> > > wants to do is die peacefully so she can go home

> to

> > > the Lord, and the

> > > sooner the better. I feel so bad for her. She

> has

> > > advanced macular

> > > degeneration and can barely see to eat, yet they

> > > never put her

> > > glasses on her, and most of the time we can't

> even

> > > find her glasses

> > > when I am there. That really makes me mad. She

> is

> > > also very hard of

> > > hearing. Her voice is so weak most of the time

> that

> > > I have to put my

> > > ear next to her mouth and still often cannot

> > > understand her. She is

> > > sweet -- never an unkind word, and always

> > > appreciative of everything

> > > I do for her. She can't sleep well and has

> terrible

> > >

> > > dreams/hallucinations that my brother in Indiana

> is

> > > there and is mad

> > > at her and cusses her out. Every time I see her

> I

> > > have to convince

> > > her again that he hasn't been there and would

> never

> > > do that to her,

> > > so she can stop worrying about him for a while.

> > > (She knows she has

> > > nightmares/hallucinations, so that helps.) Her

> > > favorite activity any

> > > more is just to go riding, so that's what we do.

> > >

> > > She is excited about donating her brain to the

> > > Harvard Brain Bank.

> > > We are in the process of trying to find out who

> to

> > > get locally to

> > > remove the brain and prepare it for shipping

> once

> > > she dies. It is so

> > > strange to be thinking this way, but will you

> all

> > > help me to pray for

> > > her that she will die peacefully and relatively

> > > soon? (Maybe in

> > > November, after we get all our ducks in a a row

> and

> > > after my brother

> > > is able to come down and visit her one more

> time.)

> > >

> > > Thank you for listening,

> > > G

> > >

> > >

> >

> >

> >

> >

>

______________________________________________________________________

> ______________

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> Autos.

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> >

>

>

>

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