Re: suggestions?

[Guest guest]

Welcome to the group Susie! You've come to the right place. My first

thought is to get Meals on Wheels to deliver at least one meal a day

to your dad. That way, you'll know that he gets at least one healthy

meal -- and all they do is ring the doorbell and hand it to him.

http://www.mowaa.org/

Also, it's probably best to contact your state's elder services. They

will send someone to your dad's home and make sure that he has

everything in place to make his home safe -- from setting up a

Lifeline (should he fall he can just press a button around his neck

and someone will talk to him over a speaker phone); to making sure

the bathroom is equipped with handle bars or seats in the shower; to

evaluating him in his daily tasks to make sure that he can do things

on his own.

Also, just getting a home health aide is beneficial to help with

laundry and cleaning (I wouldn't mind that myself...)

And you may want to look into a companion to keep him company during

his worse parts of the day. Walk with him to the store or to church

or whatever. It'll be more like him getting some well-deserved

attention vs. 'help' or 'care'.

I'm sure the rest on this board will provide you with other advice.

Keep the questions coming... And check out the updated links page.

You'll find lots of good stuff there...

http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/LBDcaregivers/links

; loving daughter of Maureen of Boston, MA; finally diagnosed

with LBD on 2/06 after also being diagnosed with everything from AD

to Vascular Dementia caused by mini strokes to Binswengers...; was

victim to rapid decline from Risperidone (or combination of

Risperidone with other drugs OR possibly received another " bad drug "

when she was observed/tested in a hospital in 10/05); in a NH since

11/05. Update: on antidepressant Celexa, 20mg (still teary, but not

as weepy) and as of 4/21 on Exelon.

Visit the LBDCaregivers board on the web:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/LBDcaregivers/

(See files, suggested links, databases, photos of members, and search

previous posts)

>

> I'm new to group - Dad is 80 & has probable diagnosis of LBD. 1st

thought it was Parkinsons, then Essential Tremor, then his memory

started failing, and the possibility of LBD came up. He lives alone

still. Remembering to eat (or wanting to eat) is an on/off thing --

he doesn't cook at all, but will fix cereal, microwave popcorn, and

eat cookies/milk. Eats pretty well when we put something in front of

him. I'm noticing less frequent showers, forgetting to use denture

cream to hold them in place. His stability is really bad; getting out

of chair is esp. hard. Has fallen (more like sunk to the ground) 3x

in the last week. He finally agreed to try the walker this week. He

doesn't want someone coming in to help ( " I'm fine " ); doesn't want to

consider a move. Any suggestions for how to get him to accept a home

care assistant? I read all the other stories and know that what we

deal with now is simple compared to what is likely coming . . . part

of me doesn't want to rush into

> care that isn't totally necessary; other part says he needs it

now, whether things are REALLY bad or not.

>

> A friend recommended " The 18-hr Day " and it has been very helpful

in understanding dementias and suggestions for caregivers . . . but

I'm hoping this group will get me some input from others " in the

soup " . Thanks for listening. Susie

>

> __________________________________________________

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Susie,

It is really difficult to care for our LO's when they don't think they

need it. Perhaps you could approach having someone come in to help your

dad by explaining that this person is here to do light house cleaning

duties and to cook thereby freeing up his time for things he enjoys (you

can explain to the caregiver that this is the story and to stick to

it). I'm sure he'll object but perhaps you can make an appeal to him

that YOU are the worse for wear because of all the worrying you are

doing over him. Yes, its fibbing and a bit of a guilt trip but we do

what we must - I've had to tell my mom some whoppers before she entered

the end stages of this disease.

In time, this disease will make it more and more difficult for your dad

to object but it will help all involved if you start formulating a plan

today. Other than having someone come into the house are there other

people in your lives who could go by your dad's house to check on

him/spend time with him to ensure his safety?

Courage