Guest guest Posted May 22, 2006 Report Share Posted May 22, 2006 I love hearing about your mother putting her feet up. My mom did that when first confined to a wheelchair. Now she's too rigid and immobile to move her legs. I would arrive to find her sitting in her wheelchair, legs up on her bed, or on her desk. Finding feet on the dining room table would be even more comical! Mom always used a footstool, but even when I took it in to her, the feet went elsewhere! , Oakville Ont. Mom 92, 12 1/2 years " Parkinsons " 3 1/2 years ago LBD diagnosis, evident much longer in hindsight. Encouraged to give up her licence 6 years ago. Currently immobile, in tilt wheelchair, spoonfed pureed food. Spends most of days behind closed eyes. Eltroxin, Tylenol 500 mg 3-4 times a day Off Aricept since Feb./06 > > > > > > > > > As of November 2005 I have inherited my 98 year mother-in-law. > > She has senile dementia, is very hard of hearing (won't wear a > > hearing aid) and has macular degeneration. > > > Dorothy has refused to do any " skills " , such as knitting or > > crocheting - she did these before she was stricken. She just > throws > > them down and says she can't do them. She won't help with dishes > or > > laundry or setting the table - she says she can't do it. She calls > > at night for her daughter who died in November. (They lived > together > > for over 30 years after the death of Dorothy's husband). I have > not > > had a good night sleep since she entered our house. And I have just > > about reached my end. > > > I took the Nursing Assistant Course at the local community > > college to be able to meet her physical needs but they just don't > go > > into the dementia. > > > She calls at night wanting for us to take her to the bathroom > > and then help her back into bed. But it is more than that -- it > > is " What do I do now? " , over and over and if you don't get the > order > > right she is lost. Also, I find I need to keep instructions at a > > minimum. When she insists on going to the bathroom, she will not > > take no for an answer, even if she has just returned from going. > She > > has sat down on the bed and said she has to go, again. If I > question > > her she says - she should know if she has to go or not. The books > > says to use a calm, modulated voice but when she can't hear any > > except a shout it is hard to modulate in any way. At 2 am I am > > afraid my resources are often at a low ebb. > > > If we can get her up during the day she just sits and won't > talk > > or do anything but " pout " . I know I am not who she wants and she is > > not where she wants to be but its me or the nursing home. > > > She can be very combative at time, especially bath time or > > getting up when she wants to sleep. I have given going out on the > > days when I was not at school and my friends have stopped coming > over > > because of her rudeness and nastiness. I have been lucky to find > > child care that would sit for the two days but she says she can't > > handle more than that because of the nastiness and she could hardly > > wait until the end of the class. > > > She was smoking a pack of cigarettes a day when she came to us > > but with luck we were able to stop it. Neither of us smoke. She > was > > sick for last month for 2 weeks with what I think was just > > stubbornness - our daughter and family (husband and one 5 year old) > > came to visit and Dorothy, essentially, refused to get up and have > > anything to do with them. She ended up impacted and sick. When we > > got that cleared up she wasn't asking for the cigarettes and since > > then I have just told her when she asks that we don't have any. > While > > our grandson, her husband's only great grandson, was her she > > threatened to cut off his fingers and eat them. This has not been > > her only threat - she has threatened to kill me, slit the dogs > > throats... So far I have not taken this seriously but I don't know > if > > I shouldn't. > > > The one thing I am thankful for is that her daughter did make > it > > a Habit for her not to go out side - she won;t even open a door > that > > is shut. > > > There is one other thing that I can add - she has dentures. > She > > rolls these around in her mouth and drools the entire time. She > has > > been know to spit them out in the garbage can but mistake. We have > > place small garbage cans at her spot in the living room, at the > > dinner table, at her bed side and of course in the bathroom. She > > spits mucus all the time, in great amounts. I don't know if that > is > > part of the dementia or not but it is really nasty. We keep gloves > > in the house to clean up any messes that she makes. She removes > > feces by way of her fingers and then wipes them on the inside of > the > > toilet and doesn't wash her hands up. We are constantly telling > her > > to wash her hands after using the bathroom. > > > Too, add to the problem for the next month my daughter, her > > husband, my grandson, 5 cats and 1 dog are making their home with > us > > while their new home is in escrow - > > > There is so much to try to put into an email - and cry at the > > same time because of the way you feel. > > > Help! > > > Becky Drew > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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