Cassandra Phenomenon links for new members

[Guest guest]

Hi all,

I'm posting this with some words of caution. " Cassandra Phenomenon " seems to be

bandied about in some AS/NT support groups, especially the Aspie bashing groups,

as a " catch all. " I would not discourage members from " googling " " Cassandra

Phenomenon, " as the psychological effects described therein are important

information. However, I feel the term itself is most appropriate when applied to

the more malignant AS/NT relationships.

Maxine Aston uses the term " Affective Deprivation Disorder " and I like that.

Same symptoms, different name.

Affective Deprivation Disorder is damaging too. Unlike marriages where there

blatant abuse, the NT spouse is aware that the AS spouse does not *mean* to be

emotionally neglectful, and yet the who is emotionally deprived is being

psychologically harmed subtle ways. The harm goes un-noticed until it is deeply

entrenched, years, perhaps decades later, and emerges as serious heath issues.

At the most extreme end is a crazy-making situation referred to as " gaslighting "

where the AS spouse is very nice to the outside world, so that no one except the

NT spouse (and possibly the children) experience abuse. I don't provide links

here though there is a link in the wikipedia article that explains the term as

it applies in film and espionage stories, and some sites like FAAAS have more

references as it applies to AS/NT marriages. Now, if you are in one of those

marriages, GET OUT NOW!

Here are the links.

The metaphor, and includes a reference to Aspergers:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cassandra_%28metaphor%29

Cassandra Phenomenon:

http://centralvalley.ca.networkofcare.org/dd/text/library/detail.cfm?id=956 & cat=\

153

" Affective Deprivation Disorder "

http://www.maxineaston.co.uk/cassandra/

In my search for good links, I notice that " Cassandra Phenomenon " seems to be

gaining more usage in the corporate world as well, completely independently of

AS issues.

I do believe that regardless of what flavour of Cassandra Phenomenon a person is

experiencing, and for whatever reason, it is damaging to its sufferer. It's so

important to get counselling and get that support, because if you don't, it does

seem almost universal that many, feeling they don't matter, begin to neglect

themselves, at great cost to their health later.

- Helen, 56, self dx'd AS, dx'd ADD