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Well, I had psyched myself up for however difficult my jail time

would be. Ready for mean cell mate(s), bad food, mean guards,

boredom, claustrophobia, etc.

But I got put in large cell with 7 really nice young women, kind,

generous, supportive, fun. There was a tv, vcr and movies, play

station, microwave, small fridge, outgoing collect call phone,

magazines, books, toilet, sink and shower. Food was okay. One night

we watched America's Top Model, and during commercial breaks we

pretended we were walking on runway modeling, and we laughed so.

Most of the women were gone during the day for court stuff or work

release. I spent most of my time watching tv, reading, meditating,

napping, talking and giving/receiving support.

The other cells aren't so deluxe, so I heard, but we were the ones

who'd admitted guilt, and had short sentences. I only served two of

the three days as they give you 1/3 time off for good behavior.

The inmates seemed a lot happier and carefree than the most of the

guards. (my story) (though isn't it all?)

Life just seems to be getting easier and easier. I guess I could be

focused on seeing negative stuff, but well it just doesn't seem to be

there like it was.

----

Now find myself running a stressful story; my parents are willing to

pay my way back to michigan, have me house/pet sit again for the

winter, help me out with restitution. But I cling to some story

about 'I need to take care of this myself. I should work for the

restitution coverage, not accept help.'

Jeez, those thoughts feel like they put me in jail. Confined. Guilty

as charged.

I should take care of restitution without any help. Is that true?

Sounds like worksheet time.

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