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In a flare....=(

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Geez, it seems like I haven't had a " real " flare for a long time, at

least not one that has taken me " down and out " , then one comes and

hits me out of the blue. It's one of those ones like the old days

too. Didn't feel " right " for a few days...kinda foggy, really

fatigued, and somewhat sore. Then today, WHAM, it hit me hard. I

made it through about an hour and a half of work before I had to

leave. I was determined at first to make it through the whole day,

but with each passing minute, my physical state got worse and worse.

I haven't felt THAT bad in a long time, and I'm not sure what

triggered it. I've been doing really good for quite some time now,

so it came as quite a surprise. I swear that every single one of my

tender points hurt! When I left work, I was to the point where I

could barely lift my arms, I couldn't think straight, which made it

totally impossible to do my job. That's scary to me, because I've

been doing my job for so long that normally I can do it on " auto-

pilot " , and my hands were refusing to cooperate. I just wanted to

lay down right then and there. I didn't want to take any meds at

work, because I knew it would just make things worse.

So, I came straight home, literally dropped everything on the floor,

took some relief meds, and just fell on my bed. I didn't move again

for the next 3 hours. I still have myself completely medicated, but

the pain is breaking through. I don't think I've ever had ALL of my

tender points hurt like this. I mean, I've had them hurt when being

poked by the doctor, but even then, it was only 16/18. Now, they

hurt without provocation. My joints hurt too, even in my hands (the

second knuckles) which has never happened. I don't know what that's

all about...if my spondy flaring too, or if it's getting worse, or

what. I couldn't get in to see my doc until Tuesday though...which

really sucks!

I hope everyone else is doing better than me. I guess I just needed

to whine a little bit, since no one around here seems to get it!

Jen

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