A Reply I got (CONTAINS SPIRITUAL TALK)

[Guest guest]

Hi All,

I got a reply to my letter to Barbara that sent the offensive mail to so

many. She does wish to come back and appologizes for her actions and tells her

story. I think you need to see it. However it does contain some spiritual

content that she believes. So if you do not with to see that part of the then

just please delete it. However I think you should all see it and I would like

your input as to what you think about forgiving her and giving her a second

chance!

Hello ,

I'm really sorry if anything I said hurt anyone. Not my intention

whatsoever. I certainly am not an expert on dealing with the problem of living

with chronic disease...I've done it all my life and have not always been

successful. I guess wisdom comes with experience....you learn from what has

happened and run with the successes and accept the failures with as much grace

as you can.

I only read two days of emails and I am not kidding , those two particular

days all I heard about is skads of drugs, and defeat, and conversation about

pain and pretty much hopelessness. I have to tell you , I just wanted to run

away, as I choose to live positively, despite my pain. I look for things to

lift me up, not pull me down.

I said you seemed positive because at least you had scripture that gave some

hope of coping with a difficult situation in life, and your comment " If He

brings you to it He'll get you through it. " At least that offered a new member

a semblance of hope.

, I if you are interested in my story, and you seemed to be or you

wouldn't have written back, I will share it will you. I would hope my life would

be used by God for His glory.

I was born without a hip socket...spent the first years of my life tied to

a hospital bed. The treatment worked though for most of my early years.My

childhood was pretty good from a physical point of view...emotionally it was

tough because my dad was an alcoholic and of course alcoholism is a family

disease. Your two " psych " evaluations sounded like they came right off the

pages of the Adult CHildren of Alcoholics hello letter.

I grew up with very little self esteem, a warped idea about faith and some

very sick emotional patterns which I have been working on for the last 54 years.

I have also experienced having an arthritic hip at 19, and after the birth of my

third child, I was pretty much confined to bed at age 32. At that point I had

three unsuccessful hip replacements. My body couldn't absorb the metal.I was

thoroughly discouraged and I was done with medical science when a surgeon

called me from Boston due to the intervention of a friend , and through his

encouragement I managed to try again...he fixed my hip.

I had also gone to college, worked happily as a teacher for eight years

before I had my family....and then when my hip was fixed raised three beautiful

children and lived with a man that accepted me with all my physical and

emotional flaws. I always seeked GOd's will, and was greatful I was born again

and knew God, not just " about " Him. My faith and His word is what got me

through.

My fixed hip lasted just 6 years and then I went crashing to the floor at

school, and not only broke the replacement, but the bone that held it. Again I

had surgery and four months later was lifting my leg into bed and broke the

entire trochanter.....more surgery, and then after six months more surgery. The

bone would not heal. My doctor was distraught. I kept hanging on, expecting

healing and wholeness.

By this time my other hip was completely gone and had to be replaced. That

replacement kept popping out and had to be redone. Two more difficult

surgeries.

The original hip was operated on again by another Boston surgeon and it has

been six years but I can walk and though I live with chronic pain, I am

functioning well enough to teach 52 children piano lessons and pursue a lifelong

dream of learning to paint. I have had to give up some of the things I

loved...long walks, playing the organ, teaching in school. Tremendous losses

and saddness galore. Major life adjustments.

All in all I have had 14 surgeries, and last year had to have a shoulder

replaced because living most of my life on crutches helped destroy the

cartalidge in my shoulder. My other shoulder is also needing to be replaced and

I am postponing until I absolutely can't stand it anymore.

To make matters worse, in 1990 I was diagnosed with fibromialgia....the

icing on the cake. I've coped with that for 14 years and it is always there,

though it's symptoms wax and wane.

When I write this down, I think " Man, this sounds like a horror story " and

I don't tell you this to complain....I just want you to know that I've made it

through with prayer first and foremost, determination not to live in depression

and negative thinking, and getting all the medical and psychological help I

could get. I realized that it was I that had to make the choice to live with

joy and not self pity. To expect good things to happen and not dwell in what I

didn't have but what I did have.....my sight to see a beautiful sunset, my

hearing to indulge in all the awsesome music the Lord has allowed talented

people to create, my hands

that can move and paint..blessings of a wonderful grown, supportive family, and

a husband who has accepted me as I am, my intelligence, that I can learn new

things every single day of my life..my computer , that I can keep in touch with

old friends and meet new ones...the list is endless . I start each day

with a list of the wonderful things I have to praise God for, and I refuse to

let my " Pain " be me....it is only one part of me, and if I take care of myself I

can thrive and live joyfully. Because of my faith, and God's faithful

guidance, I am an overcomer who will always thrive primarily because of His

love.

I believe if we focus on the cup half empty , that is what we have. I we

focus on the cup being half full, it's a lot better feeling. If we focus on the

limitations disease can have on our life, than that is what we will have....just

what I call " stinking thinking. "

I also believe that thinking about others and doing what we can to serve

others takes our eyes off our own selves . I have a friend sitting in a wheel

chair in a nursing home that is my age...due to a brain operation gone wrong. I

go and see her...who am I to complain? I look around the world and believe me,

there are always others far off worse than me....if I just sat around all day

and felt sorry for myself I wouldn't have a life. I refuse to do that.

, that is my story. I would not want to offend anyone and ask

forgiveness to those who were hurt by what I said . I'd like to try the web

site again, and not be so judgemental this time...who knows, I may even learn

something from it. Thanks, xoBarb

Please let me know your thoughts!!!!!!

Love & God Bless!

Rev./Wolf~(MOM)~Owner

WWW.WOLFPOET.COM

http://groups.msn.com/BlessingMeadowsMinistryVirtualChurch

http://groups.msn.com/BlessingMeadowsMinistrysWorldWidePrayerChain/_whatsnew.msn\

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Rev. Piercey-Gates

P.O. Box 134

Elkhart Lake, Wi.

53020

(920)876-4041

I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

" Therefore encourage one another and build each other up,

just as in fact you are doing. "

1 Thessalonians 5:11

Now as I always say this at the end of my e-mails:

IF GOD BRINGS YOU TO IT.

HE WILL BRING YOU THROUGH IT.

This has became my philosophy.