Guest guest Posted December 29, 2007 Report Share Posted December 29, 2007 Ron, is there any way for you to arrange a weekly schedule so that you can get relieved for a couple^f hours at least a few timesw a week? Is there absolutely no one to relieve you? Alternqatively can you barter with an aid possibly? trapped Does anyone else spend 24/7 with their lo?Cant leave without finding coverage for them?Not even just a trip around the block with the stereo on or something?Ive been feeling really trapped in this house and I sure would like someone that knows the feeling to talk to about it.It seems no matter what I say when trying to explain these feelings I just alienate more people.I feel like theres noone in my life who could possibly understand how I feel or relate to me.If anyone shares this feeling please feel free to email me directly.Hope all is well. Ron RON --------------------------------- Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 29, 2007 Report Share Posted December 29, 2007 Hi Norma, Ive made scedules in the past but the only one in my family that wants anything to do with it is my sister and to ask anymore of her Im afraid that all I will do is push her away like I seem to do with everyone else.Whenever I have a problem and need to talk it feels like Im looked at like some sort of alien speaking a language from outer space that noone understands..Nobody in my everyday life seems to be able to understand how hard it is to be cut off from the world. Norma Loeb/CORPHQ/NYTIMES wrote: Ron, is there any way for you to arrange a weekly schedule so that you can get relieved for a couple^f hours at least a few timesw a week? Is there absolutely no one to relieve you? Alternqatively can you barter with an aid possibly? trapped Does anyone else spend 24/7 with their lo?Cant leave without finding coverage for them?Not even just a trip around the block with the stereo on or something?Ive been feeling really trapped in this house and I sure would like someone that knows the feeling to talk to about it.It seems no matter what I say when trying to explain these feelings I just alienate more people.I feel like theres noone in my life who could possibly understand how I feel or relate to me.If anyone shares this feeling please feel free to email me directly.Hope all is well. Ron RON --------------------------------- Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 29, 2007 Report Share Posted December 29, 2007 Ron, you old dog, you are not alone. I was just playing about the old dog bit. But please do know that I share your experience 100%. Most of the time it doesn't bother me too much to have my shadow on my back all the time, but once in awhile I need to be alone. I will want to run to the store for a minute and get him a surprise. There are no surprised for him. If I am cooking and making a surprise dish, he'll walk in and look over my shoulder and the surprise is gone. If I need to take time to look in a fabric store, I can't. He is right there, and telling me he is tired, or his feet hurt. I already have to pretty well stay house bound because of my severe allergies, but I am Always shadowed. Go to the bathroom and he is looking for me. Wash clothes and he is looking for me. I know why he is doing this. It's because he is scared and I am his security blanket, but it does wear a person down. I didn't use to talk that way, but once in a while now, I find myself wishing for a few moments that are not controlled by the time clock of a hired sitter, if I had one. I took care of a baby once for several months. The woman really loved the way I pulled the baby out of a very poor condition, nearly starved to death. She would have kept me at nearly all cost, except allowing me to drive the baby up the street to Cloth-World to get some thread. When she got home the store was closed. I was stuck with that baby from 6:30Am to 7:pm at night. Every cotton pickin' day. I had no freedom at all. Before I got angry I just told her no more. Oh but she pleaded with me. " NO " I told her. I was so trapped I was going stir crazy. And that wasn't 24/7 Find a way out, Ron. For your own peace and normalcy. Find her a home and visit once in a while. You will have the freedom to move around and visit her too. That is not showing a lack of love. It is showing common sense. Save your own sanity before you want to bring harm to your mother, by scolding etc. Love you dear, Imogene In a message dated 12/29/2007 1:49:43 PM Central Standard Time, dawgg4456@... writes: Does anyone else spend 24/7 with their lo?Cant leave without finding coverage for them?Not even just a trip around the block with the stereo on or something?Ive been feeling really trapped in this house and I sure would like someone that knows the feeling to talk to about it.It seems no matter what I say when trying to explain these feelings I just alienate more people.I feel like theres noone in my life who could possibly understand how I feel or relate to me.If anyone shares this feeling please feel free to email me directly.Hope all is well. Ron RON **************************************See AOL's top rated recipes (http://food.aol.com/top-rated-recipes?NCID=aoltop00030000000004) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 29, 2007 Report Share Posted December 29, 2007 Hi Ron, Reading your posts made me sad because I know that your siblings could be doing so much more to help you yet they won't. I couldn't help but think that one doesn't have to be a caregiver to get that " trapped " feeling. Just ask the majority of moms who stay home caring for their children for any length of time and they'll tell you they feel the same thing every now and again - if they're honest. Since no one is coming around to help you get out of the house then maybe its time for you and your mom to go out? I used to make a point of walking around the block with mom nearly everyday - for her sanity and mine. When mom began getting unsteady on her feet I got her a collapsible wheel-chair at the Goodwill and off we went. The good thing with the wheelchair was that we could go for longer periods and for greater distances. If I remember correctly, you mentioned that you had a car. How about getting a collapsible wheelchair, putting it in the truck and taking mom to the mall, the library, the museum, art galleries, historical sites (a lot of these places have " free " days/hours). Even if you don't need to buy anything at the mall it helps to just get out and about among other people and will do you good. Lots of malls have food courts and you could enjoy a coffee/tea/drink with you mom or a little snack - mom and I hit the bakery every chance we got. It isn't much of an outing but its something. Courage Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 30, 2007 Report Share Posted December 30, 2007 Ron, One of the things I use to do with people is tell them I just needed to vent. They don't have to do anything but listen. That way they don't feel so helpless and won't go away because they don't know what to do. Cuz you just know everyone wants to save the world and they feel like failures when they can't save you. Sometimes that helps. Hugs, Donna R Caregave for Mom (after I brought her from WI to MI) for 3 years and 4th year in a nh. She was almost 89 when she died in '02. No dx other than mine. Re: trapped Hi Norma, Ive made scedules in the past but the only one in my family that wants anything to do with it is my sister and to ask anymore of her Im afraid that all I will do is push her away like I seem to do with everyone else.Whenever I have a problem and need to talk it feels like Im looked at like some sort of alien speaking a language from outer space that noone understands..Nobody in my everyday life seems to be able to understand how hard it is to be cut off from the world. Norma Loeb/CORPHQ/NYTIMES wrote: Ron, is there any way for you to arrange a weekly schedule so that you can get relieved for a couple^f hours at least a few timesw a week? Is there absolutely no one to relieve you? Alternqatively can you barter with an aid possibly? trapped Does anyone else spend 24/7 with their lo?Cant leave without finding coverage for them?Not even just a trip around the block with the stereo on or something?Ive been feeling really trapped in this house and I sure would like someone that knows the feeling to talk to about it.It seems no matter what I say when trying to explain these feelings I just alienate more people.I feel like theres noone in my life who could possibly understand how I feel or relate to me.If anyone shares this feeling please feel free to email me directly.Hope all is well. Ron RON --------------------------------- Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 30, 2007 Report Share Posted December 30, 2007 <snip> Alternatively can you barter with an aid possibly?<snip> I really like this idea. Ron, are you still in contact w/ those other CNAs you worked with in the past? If so, could you barter something with one of them to help you out. If anything, they KNOW what you're going through and you may be surprised by someone offering their assistance (maybe w/out a barter.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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