Re: sharing a bed

[Guest guest]

Sharing a bed. I will tell my opinion about sharing a bed! Our four

year old is crimminally insane. Therefore she has only slept in our

bedroom since infancy. When she was an infant and on monitors at

night to let us know if she stopped breathing, or had low or fast

heart rate. Then into the crib, and then the crib with the tent on

it to keep her in. Finally we have her in a toddler bed in our

bedroom. We are working behaviorially to train her to stay in bed.

It is going so so.

We have to have high locks, and alarms on all doors and windows so

that she does not escape. She got out of my parents house twice when

they were to be watching her. In the winter, in snow, with no shoes.

AAAAAHHHHHh The stuff of NIGHTMARES. Having a child with a

disability, and with absolutley no commonsense is a LOT of work. She

at four and a half can not be left alone.

Now my 7 year old has sleep terrors. She sleep walks, and sleep eats.

We have had to stop leaving cookies in actual cookie jars because she

gets up and eats the middles of them in bed at night. She then

accuses other people of eating in her bed with no memory. Gee the

chocolate ring around your mouth is not a strange thing? She is also

the one to throw up in her bed and wake up in the morning and

say: " " Mommy, someone threw up in my bed last night! " " Ah, the mad

bad regurgenatior.

Hannah 10, can not sleep. ADD, other isses keep her awake until late

in the night. She refuses to sleep in her bed most of the time. The

girls have decided that because we aircondition the bedroom with a

seperate unit that they like it better in our room. They have made

nests of blankets and sleeping bags. You just can't get the whole

house subarctic with central air.

Now Bruce, who has obstructive sleep apnea, and should always wear

his c pap does not. Snore Galore. We are talking jet engine level.

I constantly kick him to turn over, adjust his c pap etc.

Between all of this, and hurting so much no one is sleeping well.

Sometimes I even go sleep in the girls bunk beds. They are not

getting any use! I am seriously considering putting all three of the

twin beds together and just making one big bed for the girls. They

all end up in eachothers beds sleeping like puppies together.

I never assume that if you see a head and try to step over one there

might be another head that is hiding. Did I plan on the family bed.

Heck NO! Do I do what ever I need to do to get some of the little

sleep that I get. Definately.

I have just decided to pick my battles. It is not like anything

amorous is happening with the two of us anyway that they should not

be seeing.

I would encourage you highly to seek out a sleep professional, and do

a sleep study with him. Sleep apnea is a dangerous conditon. It can

cause early heart disease and heart attacks, high blood pressure,

strokes, etc. It is NOT something to mess with. I guarantee that if

his snoring is that bad, then he will get a c pap, or bi pap and feel

like superman after about a week. They have lots of models now to

fit lots of people. It really is about life and death.

I sleep upside down in our waterbed. I just can not stand all of

that bumping, and elbowing. If you have seperate comforters, it

works great. Having your own bedroom sounds like apretty good deal

too!

Good luck, and have your doctor talk to him about the snoring and

apnea.

Best Regards, Barbara

[Guest guest]

My brother and his wife don't sleep together. She has restless leg

symdrome, and he has to wear a C-PAP. So each one of them has

something that bugs the other. My brother also has FMS.

I need a lot of room myself. I like to spread out.

Dillion

> My husband and I have been together 4 years and married 3.

[Guest guest]

...you have a found a very mature way to handle this. I had the exact

same problem with and when I would punch him and say " :You're snoring " he

would tell me that he had NOT been snoring because he was lying awake listening

to himself. Pitiful, isn't it??? LOL So I sleep across the hall...we

both have our doors almost shut, but leave them open enough for the kitties to

visit. Going on a trip is an absolute no-no unless he is willing to get

separate rooms. Now that I'm older I snore, too, so I am getting even!!!!

Love, Cam

sharing a bed

My husband and I have been together 4 years and married 3. We have never

shared a bed in that time, 2 reasons, he snores like a pack of bears instead

of

just one and he sits up in his sleep and leans to my side of the bed. If I

slept

on my side of the bed he would be on top of me every night and since my right

side is the side he sleeps on he would cause me a great deal of pain every

night of the week, and after 4 years I would be more useless than I am now. We

do our snuggling other times, but not when we want to sleep. He wishes I could

sleep with him and so do I, but that is not possible so we make the best of it

and do what must be done. (My room is down stairs and his up and you can

still hear him snore when he is sleeping real deep)

Just my 2 cents worth

[Guest guest]

I hear both of you!!

Except where I was different is that I did sleep with my husband for

about 12 years. For about 3 yrs prior to my diagnosis, we tried

everything, stomach sleeping, side sleeping, those nasal strips, and

he still snored through all of it. I always woke up stiff, sore,

achy, and CRANKY, and did not know why.

In addition to my husband snoring so loud he rattles the windows, he

also intersperses that with wnat I call his bass horn pig snorts -

those would always waken me with a start, then I couldn't ever get

back to sleep, he also is a violent sleeper, he kicks hard, he

flails his arms hard, he constantly rolls all over the bed like a

human bulldozer, and he is a real cover hog.

Sleeping on the couch came at the suggestion of my primary care

physician, my rheumatologist, the x ray tech and the nurses who took

my blood and give me my mammograms.

While I can still hear him " rattling the windows " even with the door

closed, I admit I DO sleep better. Some days I do wake up sore, but

I do not feel anywhere nearly as bad as I did while sleeping with

him. The ringing in my ears has noticeably decreased also.

My husband has accused me of being spoiled and self centered, saying

I'm just being selfish by not sharing the bed with him. He teases

me that I couldn't share a bed if I had to.

Well, his business takes him out of town on overnighters

occasionally, and my daughter and I sleep on his waterbed when he is

gone. WE both sleep just fine, we do not bump into each other, nor

do we snore, and we both wake up feeling just fine.

I am capable of sharing a bed, just not with him.

He also insists he does not snore, even after being recorded by me

at home, and going through a sleep study at the hospital 3 nights in

a row. They told him, and it is recorded, that he has severe sleep

apnea, and that he does stop breathing on occasion.

They recommended either surgery, or one of those gas mask things.

Did he listen to their warnings and advice?? No, and he is still

sleeping alone.

> ...you have a found a very mature way to handle this. I

had the exact same problem with and when I would punch him and

say " :You're snoring " he would tell me that he had NOT been

snoring because he was lying awake listening to himself. Pitiful,

isn't it??? LOL So I sleep across the hall...we both have our

doors almost shut, but leave them open enough for the kitties to

visit. Going on a trip is an absolute no-no unless he is willing to

get separate rooms. Now that I'm older I snore, too, so I am

getting even!!!! Love, Cam

> sharing a bed

>

>

> My husband and I have been together 4 years and married 3. We

have never

> shared a bed in that time, 2 reasons, he snores like a pack of

bears instead of

> just one and he sits up in his sleep and leans to my side of the

bed. If I slept

> on my side of the bed he would be on top of me every night and

since my right

> side is the side he sleeps on he would cause me a great deal of

pain every

> night of the week, and after 4 years I would be more useless

than I am now. We

> do our snuggling other times, but not when we want to sleep. He

wishes I could

> sleep with him and so do I, but that is not possible so we make

the best of it

> and do what must be done. (My room is down stairs and his up and

you can

> still hear him snore when he is sleeping real deep)

>

> Just my 2 cents worth

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

LoL, I still kick my husband with my foot untill he moves and stops

snoring, or he will get startled awake by my foot and lay on his

stomache, lol.

--- camilla higley wrote:

---------------------------------

...you have a found a very mature way to handle this. I had the

exact same problem with and when I would punch him and say

" :You're snoring " he would tell me that he had NOT been snoring

because he was lying awake listening to himself. Pitiful, isn't

it??? LOL So I sleep across the hall...we both have our doors

almost shut, but leave them open enough for the kitties to visit.

Going on a trip is an absolute no-no unless he is willing to get

separate rooms. Now that I'm older I snore, too, so I am getting

even!!!! Love, Cam

sharing a bed

My husband and I have been together 4 years and married 3. We have

never

shared a bed in that time, 2 reasons, he snores like a pack of bears

instead of

just one and he sits up in his sleep and leans to my side of the bed.

If I slept

on my side of the bed he would be on top of me every night and since

my right

side is the side he sleeps on he would cause me a great deal of pain

every

night of the week, and after 4 years I would be more useless than I

am now. We

do our snuggling other times, but not when we want to sleep. He

wishes I could

sleep with him and so do I, but that is not possible so we make the

best of it

and do what must be done. (My room is down stairs and his up and you

can

still hear him snore when he is sleeping real deep)

Just my 2 cents worth