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Dear Cheryl,

You said:

<<I've noticed over the past two or three days appears to be

more depressed than usual. (He's been on the liquid paxil since

Saturday). He's also mentioned the feelings and thoughts of paranoia

have become more frequent. I thought the " paranoia thing " had

completely resolved itself, but yesterday he said that it still comes

and goes, just not with the intensity we've seen before.>>

** Saturday was the day that he got 50% more of the Paxil than he was

taking. This could cause any of the symptoms mentioned above.

You said:

<< He' worried that he doesn't " feel " anything. He gets very

frustrated about his future, feels he has absolutely nothing to live

for and almost refuses to consider the very real possibilty that one

day he'll have this behind him and will be much better. >>

** It's normal not to feel anything when on a drug like this. That is

precisely what it is intended to do. The longer he is on it, the more

chance there is that he will also be somewhat emotionally numbed even after

discontinuing the drug.

was depressed originally for the reasons you cite. That is why

he began taking Paxil. That problem has not been resolved. It is something

that wil require some work.

At least 50% of the people who come here, and at least 90% of the males,

are discouraged and don't see their lives as worth living. That changes as

they interact with the group. I am concerned that with not

interacting with the group and you ac5ting as his proxy, he will not get the

opportunity to make the shift that others do. He has a set way of

interacting with his parents and is much younger emotionally with them than

he would be on his own with friends or in a group. My concern is that he

will not develop what he needs to make it through all of this until he

becomes more invested in the process. At this point, you're more invested

than he is. He's going to have to get much more emotionally mature and

tough if he is going to make it through this. He is going to have to be

willing to experience some of the things he is experiencing in order to make

it through this.

The withdrawal and recovery from these drugs is a difficult journey.

There will be times of deep depression, anxiety, hopelessness, and despair.

It can't be taken away. For most people, it's also a rite of passage, an

opportunity to mature. The people who peddle the drugs hold out the promise

of removing all discomfort for people. Some people find this happening for

them; but look at the cost.

I reallly wish we could figure out a way for him to be more directly

involved. We stand a better chance of engaging him and teaching him a way

to regard alll this that will help him through it.

You said:

<< I brought up the " reading thing " to him as a " positive " in the

middle of all this mess and his comment was, " that wasn't real...it

didn't last " . It was late when this came out, so I didn't try to pry

any further, but I'm hoping he was drawing a wrong conclusion. Will

let you know..>>

** I look forward to hearing more about this.

Regards,

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> and goes, just not with the intensity we've seen before.

> He' worried that he doesn't " feel " anything. He gets very

> frustrated about his future, feels he has absolutely nothing to

live

> for and almost refuses to consider the very real possibilty that

one

> day he'll have this behind him and will be much better.

> I brought up the " reading thing " to him as a " positive " in the

> middle of all this mess and his comment was, " that wasn't real...it

> didn't last " . It was late when this came out, so I didn't try to

pry

> any further, but I'm hoping he was drawing a wrong conclusion.

Will

> let you know..

> I know alot of what he's feeling is just part of the healing

> process and what he has to go through....but should you have any

> suggestions that might help him along at this point we'd appreciate

> it.

>

> Healthy, Happy Blessings~~

> Cheryl

Hey Cheryl,

thats almost exactly how i felt a year ago. I took me a while till i

could see some hope. I hope justin gets there faster than i did.

when you said " the reading thing " were you talking about reading the

posts on this board? i think it would help him alot.

-joe

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>

> At least 50% of the people who come here, and at least 90% of

the males,

Interesting thought, i also noticed that it seems like its hard for

the guys to deal with whats happened to them than the ladies, who can

somehow take it in stride.

-joe

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Hi Joe..

Yes...I agree that coming into this group and corresponding with

everyone would help tremendously..and he does sit here with me

from time to time..but...even that's not the same as him being here

alone and exchanging his thoughts with everyone. The problem is

this... was diagnosed with several learning disabilities when

he was very young...dyslexia and ADHD. He's never been able to read

very well and his writing/spelling abilities are even less. I'm

going to keep on encouraging him to try (cause he could do it, if

he'd just get determined). I've told him no one here cares how well

he spells!

The reading thing is a rather odd. Several weeks back, when he was

going through one of the worse times yet, he quite suddenly realized

that he could read. It was quite a moment in time for all of

us...like a dream come true...he could REALLY read. 's problem

never was " word recognition " . He knew individual words..but putting

them all together, one after the other into sentences was impossible

for him...he couldn't do that. But somehow, while paxil was

scrambling his brain chemistry...it apparently unscrambled that

portion that kept him from reading. Strange but true.

Anyway, we're hoping he can retain that ability, he's been in such

a down mood I've hated to even bring it up again. He's so negative

about everything. Hopefully today will be a better day for him.

Blessings,

Cheryl

> Hey Cheryl,

>

> thats almost exactly how i felt a year ago. I took me a while till

i

> could see some hope. I hope justin gets there faster than i did.

> when you said " the reading thing " were you talking about reading

the

> posts on this board? i think it would help him alot.

> -joe

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