What will give satisfaction?

October 18, 2006

Dh and I were talking last night about nada and dishrag. They are

having trouble selling their home, they have health problems and

financial problems among other things and dh asked me, " does it give

you satisfaction that they are having trouble? " I thought about this

and I said " No it really doesn't I wish they could sell so they

could move farther away " He brought up the point it wouldn't be that

much farther. I still don't care, to me I really don't care what

happens in their life. To me my nada is dead and dishrag is a man I

sometimes talk to in order to stay out of court. We were talking

about what would give me satisfaction with them. So what is my

answer? I really couldn't tell you because I don't even know that

myself. 1 my nada could be exposed to all the people for all she has

ever done. 2 dishrag could finally see her and divorce her. 3 she

could die 4 she could mooch until the day she or dishrag die 5 she

continues on her path of destruction. 6 she gets help and I still

don't want her in my life. To be honest I don't like any of these. I

don't give a rats tail what happens. I just want her to go away. I

don't want to know. I don't want to see any more pain in my life or

anybody else's. There is nothing she could do that could take away

the pain. I don't even want to see her in pain, I just want it to be

over. There is nothing that could cure this, nothing that can take

it away, nothing that can fix things. I will just live for the

future there is no sense in living for the past. I don't care what

happens I just want it to end. Can you understand? I just feel numb

to them.

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