Yay! deflecting the FOO-lishness

September 20, 2006

Hi everyone, I've been absent on the board for a while because life

has been a little crazy/stressful. I've been working 2 jobs and one

of them was not a good environment for a KO if you know what I mean.

I quit though, phew. So life should be a lot more sane.

Anyway, I just wanted to post about my recent brushes with Foo drama

and my new and improved coping skills! In case some of you don't

know, about a month ago I allowed myself to get way too worked up over

foo drama even though I am no longer on the same continent as the rest

of them.

After that experience, I emailed my split-black brother and told him

to please spare me the foo drama. He hasn't emailed me since which is

sad as we'd recently become close, but I feel ok about it. If he

can't have a relationship with me outside of reporting foo-doings,

that's his problem.

Recently when my split good brother wrote me asking for advice and

acting all friendly, I was able to remember that I'm probably just

being split good at this time(he hasn't given me the time of day in

about a decade). I replied to him kindly, didn't get my hopes up and

refused to get sucked in to his drama with our nada--which I think was

the real purpose of his email.

AND, on a recent phone call with nada, she started to tell me some

disturbing secret about baby brother that had her " very upset " and

that I 'couldn't tell anyone else,' not even my dad. . .. I stopped

here right there and said, " don't tell me. " I felt/feel a little

guilty, because she said it's been weighing on her, BUT I AM NOT HER

PARENT OR HER PSYCHOLOGIST OR HER PRIEST.

I think I'm going to be the kid I never got to be for a while without

intervening as a parent to my brothers or my parents for that matter.

The crapola my foo has created is not my problem. DH has been really

supportive about my new take on the matter. I'm feeling sad because

I'm separating more and more from my foo by choosing not to be in the

drama. I feel like I can choose between having insanity and chaos or

having no family basically. It's like they don't have any other

hobbies, anything else to talk about or any other way to relate to

each other outside of the drama.

But at least I'm proud of myself for being strong on this and for

knowing drama when I see it.

Trish

September 21, 2006

Charlie--you are so right about the two jobs and my many " passtimes! "

Especially since one of the jobs was with people who were LAME--not

bp, just lame. I think I took it because I was worried about DH

quitting his job, but that's no longer on the table, so I felt free to

quit. And I'm no longer doing dh's lesson plans, he's fending for

himself, as he should be. As for our crazy neighbor. . .I just turn

up the music and let her rant away alone--she doesn't even deserve a

visit from the police--let her spill water on herself and melt away

into her own misery! I feel very liberated now that I have fewer

" responabilities. "

Trish

> >

> > Hi everyone, I've been absent on the board for a while because life

> > has been a little crazy/stressful. I've been working 2 jobs and one

> > of them was not a good environment for a KO if you know what I mean.

> > I quit though, phew. So life should be a lot more sane.

> >

> > Anyway, I just wanted to post about my recent brushes with Foo drama

> > and my new and improved coping skills! In case some of you don't

> > know, about a month ago I allowed myself to get way too worked up over

> > foo drama even though I am no longer on the same continent as the rest

> > of them.

> >

> > After that experience, I emailed my split-black brother and told him

> > to please spare me the foo drama. He hasn't emailed me since which is

> > sad as we'd recently become close, but I feel ok about it. If he

> > can't have a relationship with me outside of reporting foo-doings,

> > that's his problem.

> >

> > Recently when my split good brother wrote me asking for advice and

> > acting all friendly, I was able to remember that I'm probably just

> > being split good at this time(he hasn't given me the time of day in

> > about a decade). I replied to him kindly, didn't get my hopes up and

> > refused to get sucked in to his drama with our nada--which I think was

> > the real purpose of his email.

> >

> > AND, on a recent phone call with nada, she started to tell me some

> > disturbing secret about baby brother that had her " very upset " and

> > that I 'couldn't tell anyone else,' not even my dad. . .. I stopped

> > here right there and said, " don't tell me. " I felt/feel a little

> > guilty, because she said it's been weighing on her, BUT I AM NOT HER

> > PARENT OR HER PSYCHOLOGIST OR HER PRIEST.

> >

> > I think I'm going to be the kid I never got to be for a while without

> > intervening as a parent to my brothers or my parents for that matter.

> >

> > The crapola my foo has created is not my problem. DH has been really

> > supportive about my new take on the matter. I'm feeling sad because

> > I'm separating more and more from my foo by choosing not to be in the

> > drama. I feel like I can choose between having insanity and chaos or

> > having no family basically. It's like they don't have any other

> > hobbies, anything else to talk about or any other way to relate to

> > each other outside of the drama.

> >

> > But at least I'm proud of myself for being strong on this and for

> > knowing drama when I see it.

> >

> > Trish

> >

>

September 21, 2006

Good for you, Trish.

tlblack2006 wrote: Charlie--you are so right

about the two jobs and my many " passtimes! "