Re: The new guy.

[Guest guest]

Hi DJ,

Just want to say 'Welcome aboard' if I may! You're among friends

here. That was quite an interesting post! It's pretty late here in

the U.K. so I'll have to keep my post brief.

I too have a photographic memory of times from very early childhood.

I had just put it down to my need to hold dearly to those particular

times as my mother died in her mid-thirties, when I was almost 5,

though I'm certain there's more to it than that. My memories go back

to about the age of 3, and I have many vivid memories. My aunty came

to stay with us for a month from Australia a year ago and was amazed

at my ability to remember past childhood events that she verifies as

having happened. I even remember particular patterns/prints on

material my mother had used to sew clothes for me, some seemingly

random events while others hold obvious significance. Pretty much

all the females on both my mother's and father's side of the family

died in their mid thirties or earlier(I'm hanging on and will be

pretty cross if I'm taken with a young son still left to raise!)

You mentioned sleeping problems. Have you ever tried melatonin?

This has worked wonders in my family and I know of many families here

in the U.K. who wouldn't be without it and quite a few wives have

reported excellent results for their husbands.

Wish I had more time to touch on certain other points but for now,

sleep is calling! I wish you well and hope you find a remedy sooner

rather than later for your sleep dilemma. Anxiety is our most

dominant emotion so I sympathise.

Regards,

-- In AutisticSpectrumTreeHouse , Kealolo <dw@s...> wrote:

> Hello, this is my first post to the list. I toyed with the idea of

> doing a short, toe-in-the-water note, or just passively watching to

> pick up the group vibe for awhile, but am going with the third

> choice: Sending a rather long email and seeing what sort of response

> I do or don't get. This will also be useful for YOU folks, inasmuch

> as you can tell me to 'go away' if the rather lengthy message is a

> poor fit.

>

> I will preface by saying that most of my emails - in general - are

> pithy, focused, and concise. This one is not representative; it is a

> core dump.

>

> Indeed, I'll allow myself to ramble. You don't know me, I don't know

> you, so there's no ego on the line. I have hope of finding out stuff

> and making friends, but who knows? This is an experiment.

>

> I'm male, 53, intelligent, and have a lot of unexplained physical and

> probably mental problems.

>

> I diagnosed my father with Asperger's about 9 years ago, when the

> internet got sufficiently usable. The diagnosis has since been

> appreciated and confirmed by Doctors - he's a textbook case, near as

> I can tell, and to the extent anyone can be said to be.

>

> However, I was largely cut off from information about the rest of his

> family, because he was adopted by his grandmother, making his mother

> legally his sister. All I'll say of that story now is that it has

> not been until now, as I'm taking care of his medical needs in his

> old age and dealing with the problems that are more pronounced now,

> that I'm speaking more with his relatives and getting more of the

> full family history... and it's clear that ALL descendants of his

> grandmother apparently have some degree of autism-spectrum disorder,

> from full-on institutionalized autism, to diagnoses of " aspergers "

> which then deteriorated into institutionalized near-autism in

> disturbing ways, to a number of high-functioning asperger-like

> people, odd but very good at certain things.

>

> It is perhaps strange that I never seriously considered Aspergers, or

> something similar, as a root of some of my own problems. The reason

> I did not is that I was not a 'perfect match' for the criteria. Some

> things seemed 'dead on' and others simply didn't seem to apply.

> Moreover, many of my problems were 'obviously' physical. So I have

> been worked up for 30 years for a host of physical problems which

> may, in retrospect, have a partially psychogenic nature.

> Unsuccessfully, I'll add. Here's where I start telling you a little

> really peculiar stuff about myself, and you may see why I'm now

> looking in this direction. This will be a random top-of-the-head,

> utterly incomplete list:

>

> - I banged my head from before age 1 until at least age 15. Not

> being self-destructive, I developed techniques to do so without

> cracking my head open, such as whacking into a pillow or a couch. I

> did it to calm my brain and bring on sleep. ly, I miss it and

> would do it now if I didn't think it'd give me a stroke. This

> head-banging was called 'bouncing' by my family, who accepted it. I

> would strike backwards with my head so it would impact about twice

> per second for hours at a time, multiple times per day. I achieved a

> calm state thereby, free from rage and anxiety. No doctor was ever

> asked about it by my parents.

>

> - my language development was normal as a child; if anything, my

> awareness was precocious. perhaps unusual was that I have clear

> memories - protographically clear - from long before babies are

> supposed to be fixing memories.

>

> - my experiences in school were typical for a high-functioning autism

> child in the 50's and 60's, which is to say I was physically abused

> by teachers and larger students, and a social outcast. By the end of

> high school, I was paranoid, anxiety-ridden, and not sane by any

> decent measure. My grades had been A's and F's; I ultimately avoided

> the draft by being insane - the first time in had come in handy,

> though I didn't really buy it; and got into college on probation on

> the basis of high SAT scores. To keep my 2S deferrment, I made high

> grades in everything once in college, even the stuff I hated. I was

> offered a full scholarship in my least-favorite class, and of course

> turned it down. During high school I had a few freakishly high math

> scores in national tests, but nothing ever came of that. Why would I

> want it to?

>

> - As I've noted, as a child I had frequent rages and tantrums, which

> in retrospect were a figment of my mind and not caused by anything

> external; I can remember them nearly photographically as well, and

> re-examine details of interactions in my mind which happened 45 or

> more years ago. Having done so, it is clear that the rages were

> autism-like, and that I really do owe my smaller siblings an apology

> for the rough treatment. I related more closely to dogs than people,

> and became obsessively protective over them. In fact, my ultimate

> career as a conservationist may not be entirely coincidental - though

> it was volitional.

>

> - I have been high-functioning in many, not few, areas of endeavor;

> ironically often making me a leader although my nature is

> introverted. I do have problems remembering faces, while from about

> age 20-40 I didn't require an address or phone log for my many

> hundreds of contacts. All instantly memorized of course. I found

> eidetic memory to be a bit of a curse in high school and so practiced

> at NOT doing it, learning to thrown out the mental trash, sort of.

>

> - As to whether I lack empathy, how should I know? Anyone meeting me

> now would say that I am hugely empathetic. I'm happily married. I am

> able to broker complex business deals between multiple parties in

> which I have to simultaneously interpret how each of more than a

> dozen entities will respond to a live situation, and anticipate their

> reaction. I have been accused of mind-reading. Yet as a child I

> know I had no sense of empathy whatsoever, existing in an utter

> tanen-for-granted solipcist universe, and I wonder whether, in

> constructing work-arounds, I have become hyper-able because my

> workarounds are more effective in a behavioristic sense than 'real'

> empathy. My suspicion is that in those with plenty of intellect to

> spare, such work-arounds can be more 'useful' in many situations than

> real empathy. For instance, my Asperger's dad was an advertising

> manager for a large national firm. Though a bit odd in person, he

> modeled in his mind how other people would react... so well he made a

> career of it. Yet I don't know that he is capable of real empathy.

> Love, yes.... though far be it from me to debate what THAT is.

>

> - I consciously restructured my outward personality at about age 20

> to appear normal, and succeeded. However, the internal stresses and

> problems were still in there. I have had unexplained hypertension

> since at least age 16 when they started checking.

>

> - As noted, I have intractable health problems. These may be broadly

> divided into neuromuscular problems and brain problems. The doctors

> have no clue what the cause is, though I have been tested for 3

> decades. There are some physical things which can be measured, and

> which have threatened my life - peripheral and autonomic neuropathies

> mostly. I have exercise intolerance and a host of other problems,

> including rare paralysis of the legs. This is considered to be an

> unknown metabolic neuropathy. I realize that this probably has

> nothing to do with an autism-like disorder. (am I wrong?) may be some

> carb involvement as some muscle groups can go numb or flaccid if I

> don't have the carbs. Again, that's probably a whole different thang.

>

> - my worst problem is terrible insomnia, usually kicked off by

> stress. One of my brothers has it as badly as I do. It gets worse,

> not better, and can become asomnia, no sleep for 8 days or so before

> some disease claims me and the histamines put me to sleep.

> Adrenaline is like a toxin to me at this point in my life. That has

> been the case, worsening, for about the last 20 years. I get very

> weak, nightmares while I can still sleep, flushed face, loud

> tinnitus, GI problems, and am confined to bed or light activity until

> it resolves, usually a matter of days or weeks. Having failed to

> find a physical cause after exhaustive testing, I might conjecture

> that I have run on adrenaline to keep my brain operating in

> hyper-speed mode for 5 decades, and that my body simply can't deal

> with it anymore. That's what it feels like.

>

> I'm leaving out a lot. How could it be otherwise?

>

> So. Does this sound like Aspergers-type stuff or some other

> wackiness to you folks?

>

> I'd appreciate any thoughts, will answer any questions. And I thank

> you for your time.

>

> DJ

[Guest guest]

In reply to ,

>Hi DJ,

>

>Just want to say 'Welcome aboard' if I may! You're among friends

Many thanks.

>I too have a photographic memory of times from very early childhood.

My own is pretty unusual, though I have no idea if it has anything to

do with Asperger's or autism. My " photographic " memories go back so

far that it seems difficult for people to believe. Before language,

long before self-awareness, long before age 1. So I never mention

it... ever... except I am here, in case it's useful.

> Pretty much

>all the females on both my mother's and father's side of the family

>died in their mid thirties or earlier(I'm hanging on and will be

>pretty cross if I'm taken with a young son still left to raise!)

I hope that whatever they died of is nothing you share; and

independently of that, hope it's nothing *I* share. Diseases which

may be co-morbid conditions more often seen among spectrum people is

one thing I'm primarily interested in, since various things seem

trying to kill me.

>You mentioned sleeping problems. Have you ever tried melatonin?

>This has worked wonders in my family and I know of many families here

>in the U.K. who wouldn't be without it and quite a few wives have

>reported excellent results for their husbands.

Melatonin doesn't work for me, aside from guaranteeing particularly

bizarre dreams. Same deal with my brother, who shares the

intractable insomnia. Thus I have to rely on prescription drugs a

lot, which I hate to do, since they're habit-forming. No real choice

though. And even they sometimes don't work.

>

>Wish I had more time to touch on certain other points but for now,

>sleep is calling! I wish you well and hope you find a remedy sooner

>rather than later for your sleep dilemma. Anxiety is our most

>dominant emotion so I sympathise.

I wish I remember what I was like to hear sleep calling. This last

month I've averaged maybe 90 minutes of drugged 'sleep' per night.

It isn't enough.

I'll be here, if you have other thoughts I'd enjoy hearing them.

best

DJ

[Guest guest]

DJ wrote:

>- my worst problem is terrible insomnia, usually kicked off by

>stress. ...Having failed to

>find a physical cause after exhaustive testing, I might conjecture

>that I have run on adrenaline to keep my brain operating in

>hyper-speed mode for 5 decades, and that my body simply can't deal

>with it anymore. That's what it feels like.

That (persistent insomnia) sounds horrible. :-( I have occasional

insomnia and the idea of having it chronically scares me. For me, it

definitely is stress-related. I can't sleep within several hours of

doing anything " social " (anything involving another person or

persons). Last night, for example, I got home at about 9:45 after

attending a small (eight person) class. I spent two hours doing

de-stressing things, but I still had to take a pill because my body

and mind were unable to unclench. A clenched mind and/or body is not

a mind/body that is able to relax enough to enter sleep.

Your theory about adrenaline overload sounds logical to me. Someone I

know online (Patty? Is Patty here?) once posited a similar theory,

IIRC.

I hope someone comes up with a solution for this problem within your lifetime.

Jane

http://staff.washington.edu/mjane

[Guest guest]

Hi DJ,

Finally, an opportunity to reply! Life's pretty hectic with family

birthdays etc at the moment.

Hope life is treating you kindly there, sounds like you have really

been through the works and with what sounds a dreadful sleep disorder,

forgive me for saying 'sleep is calling' when I last posted!

You mentioned head-banging or 'bouncing' as your family aptly named

it. Can't say I enjoyed or engaged in the same, though I fully

understand it. This kind of repetitive activity is usually a

response to distress, anger or frustration but in your case, might it

perhaps have stemmed from having no other way to occupy yourself?

Head-banging mostly occurs in young children, though I've learned that

it tends to continue longer in those with a more severe expression of

generalized disabilities and in this case,may last into adult life.

You mentioned that 'no doctor was ever asked about it by your

parents.' I remember having rages as a child, after my mother was

gone and my father likewise made no mention of such things to our

doctor. My father didn't believe in immunisations and so I

contracted measles and some of the more dreadful childhood viruses

very young and was lucky to have lived by all accounts, with little

care given. I certainly have vivid memories of those times despite

delirium! I was a very passive child, but was no longer 'safe' after

my mother's passing. My life at home was nothing short of hell, but

I am a survivor like many of us. Perhaps this is why I appreciate my

existence/my family so much today. Even I am left pondering how I

can feel so positive so much of the time despite the past. Life is

short as they say and once I would have said 'everything in life is

temporary! - not too sure about this one anymore!

I'm not surprised that you wound up in positions of leadership despite

being introverted. I hear of this quite a bit and see it in my own

family. There are entrepreneurs in my family, an older brother had

been successful enough to retire at 30, but is a workaholic even

today. He is now 56.

I have experienced the insomnia you speak of with all it's

accompaniments as you mentioned but only at times of extreme stress.

I have made changes to attempt to minimise the chances of this

happening again as it's not too good a place to be. I can relate

with your comment 'I might conjecture that I have run on adrenaline to

keep my brain operating in hyper-speed for 5 decades, and that my body

simply can't deal with it anymore.' This was never more true for me

than when I was running my own childcare business, a first aider two

nights a week, going to Uni part-time and caring for a family. I

seemingly thrived on it all. I loved every minute of this time of my

life and was a high achiever. I felt as though I was running on pure

adrenaline all the time and so the clock was ticking on health issues.

I found myself susceptible to things like pleurisy and pneumonia.

I have heard that this is not so uncommon. I have a tendency to

throw myself into some pretty stressful situations with a view to

assisting others but it is unfortunately to my detriment. Some of

the things I have done,I now look back on as completely 'nuts!!! I

was such a perfectionist too! I'm forcing myself to slow down a bit

now. Burn out is beckoning!

I'm sorry to hear of your intractable health problems. I am familiar

with exercise intolerance, have seen it in others. How long have

your legs been affected by the paralysis(if you don't mind my asking?)

I would agree that this would tend not to be autism related.

I too have hypertension. The untimely deaths of pretty much all the

females in my family,(though one aunt is doing just fine) and it now

turns out even the majority of males who have thus far passed on, is

brain haemorrhage/stroke so I think I know how I'm going out! The

majority also had hypertension - no surprises there! I enjoy

exercise(aerobic) and my 17 year old daughter and I have an interest

in archery! Very dangerous to rabbits though!

Sending you very best wishes for better sleep and improvement in all

areas of your health(You are a concern!),

ps Apologies for the length of this, never intended for it to be of

this length!

Your care for your father is admirable. You clearly have alot to

deal with.

> I'll be here, if you have other thoughts I'd enjoy hearing them.

>

> best

> DJ

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

In reply to ...

Thanks. This is a bright halloween morning with temps in the 80's

here in mid-pacific; unfortunately I barely slept and can barely walk

a straight line. So please accept the disclaimer that i'm a bit

loopy as I write this.

>Hope life is treating you kindly there, sounds like you have really

>been through the works and with what sounds a dreadful sleep disorder,

>forgive me for saying 'sleep is calling' when I last posted!

It was not insensitive at all. I'm glad you can sleep. Indeed,

there many things I can't do now, but lack of sleep is the worst

since it robs you of your rationality - among other things.

It's a bit of a contrasting dynamic on a group such as this; a new

person is posting more or less out of desperation, but this is

interjected into a community which is getting on with coping. I take

it, though, from the relatively lack of comment that intractable

insomnia is not suffered by many others on the list.

>

>You mentioned head-banging or 'bouncing' as your family aptly named

>it. Can't say I enjoyed or engaged in the same, though I fully

>understand it. This kind of repetitive activity is usually a

>response to distress, anger or frustration but in your case, might it

>perhaps have stemmed from having no other way to occupy yourself?

Retroactive introspection - 50 years later - is probably an inexact

science. It's safe to say I had frequent rage. And the reason I did

it was to feel calm. I don't know what was happening... whether my

mind was starved of endorphins or had some other imbalance, but

whacking my head repeatedly would finally get my thoughts calm.

I assume this has something to do with my brain wiring. perhaps of

note - and this will definitely sound peculiar - is that in past

years (within the last decade), a coping strategy to get me to sleep

was to have my wife repeatedly kick my thigh muscle HARD. Yes, it

hurt. But it would finally get me to sleep. Endorphins? perhaps.

We finally had to stop that because it was damaging the blood vessels

in my left leg. (I am NOT a masochist... lack of sleep is much worse

than physical pain. Who would choose a nasty insanity over a bit of

pain?). Unquestionably, there's something off kilter in my head...

wondering whether it's autism-like or something else is what I'm now

investigating. Head-banging in youth is often mentioned as autistic,

and with all my autistic and Aspergers family members, it's a natural

thing to wonder about. I might even conjecture that if it is so,

that a malfunction in the endorphin systems of the brain may be

responsible for many autism-linked problems.

>Head-banging mostly occurs in young children, though I've learned that

>it tends to continue longer in those with a more severe expression of

>generalized disabilities and in this case,may last into adult life.

Clearly, I did it because I felt better doing it than not doing it.

This was true as a baby and would be true today, except I'd have a

stroke if I subjected my brain to that kind of accelerations now. I

think the rage and anxiety are still 'in there', covered up by my

coping mechanisms, but still playing havoc with my poor brain.

BTW, excuse me for using the words " I " and " my " a lot; my current

situation feels a bit like an emergency and my immediate use of this

group is a pragmatic one, to find out why this is taking me apart.

>You mentioned that 'no doctor was ever asked about it by your

>parents.'

My parents were well-educated if a bit offbeat, but the 50's was a

simple time. They didn't worry about much. My mom now feels guilty

about it, but it was a naive time. They were reasonably attentive,

but I was their first child and they just assumed anything I did was

normal. The pediatricians they used were worse than useless.

>Even I am left pondering how I

>can feel so positive so much of the time despite the past. Life is

>short as they say and once I would have said 'everything in life is

>temporary! - not too sure about this one anymore!

I do a pretty good job of being positive if you define that as not

sliding into total depression.... and hey, I haven't shared any of my

physical problems, but they're daunting. Keeping a sense of humor

helps, and I have a bit of fatalism which serves me well - low

expectations. I also vest more energy into trying to help the world

than trying to help myself; which some would say is what sustains me,

others would say is the main problem, and a wise person might say is

both.

I have hidden my medical and other problems from the world. My

accomplishments have been significant enough that I'd probably be

lauded if my various disabilities were known. But I don't WANT to be

lauded. I don't wish to be a legend after my death. I don't wish to

interact with people in uncontrolled ways at all. One of the few

reliefs, as my disabilities have cut into my abilities, is that by

laying off the many employees I used to have, I don't have to manage

them. I hated management; it was a mistake in retrospect.

>

>I'm not surprised that you wound up in positions of leadership despite

>being introverted. I hear of this quite a bit and see it in my own

>family. There are entrepreneurs in my family, an older brother had

>been successful enough to retire at 30, but is a workaholic even

>today. He is now 56.

Indeed. Most of the time, in my efforts which have achieved the most

international publicity, I have managed to find a 'front' person to

be my spokesperson while I quitely run things and tell them what to

do. Fame would arguably have been useful to me, but I'd honestly

rather have leprosy.

It's possible that withdrawal to a Thoreau-esque setting might be the

closest thing to an answer I'll ever come up with - not that I'm able

to do that now. My physical problems keep me shackled to my

euphemistically named 'health' plan.

>

>I have experienced the insomnia you speak of with all it's

>accompaniments as you mentioned but only at times of extreme stress.

>I have made changes to attempt to minimise the chances of this

>happening again as it's not too good a place to be.

I have come to entertain the possibility that I am ALWAYS under

extreme stress by 'normal' standards. It has been worse recently:

both my father, who I am responsible for (lives next door), and my

wife's dad, who lives 2500 miles away, managed to nearly die in the

same week of slightly different things, and so she and I are now

dealing with the equivalent of much-loved but combative

terminally-ill children... who have car keys and can disinherit us.

That's the cause du jour... but whatever it is in any given month,

it's getting worse and I believe it may kill me off if I don't figure

out some fundamentally different way of dealing with it.

>I felt as though I was running on pure

>adrenaline all the time and so the clock was ticking on health issues.

> I found myself susceptible to things like pleurisy and pneumonia.

>I have heard that this is not so uncommon. I have a tendency to

>throw myself into some pretty stressful situations with a view to

>assisting others but it is unfortunately to my detriment. Some of

>the things I have done,I now look back on as completely 'nuts!!! I

>was such a perfectionist too! I'm forcing myself to slow down a bit

>now. Burn out is beckoning!

This sounds like me, except I'm 10 years past burnout, literally.

And doctors just roll their eyes at this stuff. They'll give you a

sedative or an antidepressant, but are mostly lazy... don't know how

it is there, but here the HMO's give each doctor about 15 minutes to

listen to what's wrong and then decide. What ELSE is there time for

but pushing pills?

>

>I'm sorry to hear of your intractable health problems. I am familiar

>with exercise intolerance, have seen it in others. How long have

>your legs been affected by the paralysis(if you don't mind my asking?)

> I would agree that this would tend not to be autism related.

Something has been wrong with my legs, and to lesser extent other

muscles, probably for at least 30 years. I tend to have lactic

acidosis. I have nearly no aerobic ability, and it isn't all

deconditioning though that's certainly contributing now. I only went

into full leg paralysis once, with no warning... and the rest of my

body was not doing that well either. Yet I have tested negative for

the muscular dystrophies and other stuff... I wonder whether it's

possible to just go on adrenaline so long that you fall over, cold,

with a shallow heartbeat... which is what happened to me at that

time (in a foreign country, no less). Other times I'll exercise a bit

too much and my leg muscles will burn with pain for days... severe

pain, with the legs hot to the touch. So I fully believe that

something else, probably metabolic, is going on. Further, I think

that some of the 'autism' type things I may have going on may be

confusing the prospects of sorting out what's from a screwy brain and

what's from the 'metabolic neuropathy', as the doctors call it.

>

>I too have hypertension. The untimely deaths of pretty much all the

>females in my family,(though one aunt is doing just fine) and it now

>turns out even the majority of males who have thus far passed on, is

>brain haemorrhage/stroke so I think I know how I'm going out! The

>majority also had hypertension - no surprises there! I enjoy

>exercise(aerobic) and my 17 year old daughter and I have an interest

>in archery! Very dangerous to rabbits though!

My hypertension is 'controlled' but it was largely uncontrolled for

at least 40 years, so that doesn't help the old internal organs. I

expect a cerebral hemmorage to be what does me in, but who knows?

YOU should make sure yours is controlled; your fate isn't controlled

entirely by your heredity. Have you been checked for aneurisms?

They can often fix those now.

I too enjoy exercise... I just can't do it more than a little without

risking serious problems, which I won't go into at length here.

Archery is fun; I used to be quite good. Don't think I'd care to

shoot a rabbit, though.

>

>Sending you very best wishes for better sleep and improvement in all

>areas of your health(You are a concern!),

>

>

>

>ps Apologies for the length of this, never intended for it to be of

>this length!

many thanks... and by my standards, your note was a short one!

DW

[Guest guest]

DW wrote:

>... Other times I'll exercise a bit

>too much and my leg muscles will burn with pain for days... severe

>pain, with the legs hot to the touch.

Have you been check for compartmental syndrome?

See, e.g., http://www.orthop.washington.edu/faculty/Matsen/compartmental/01

Jane

[Guest guest]

> In reply to ...

>

> It's a bit of a contrasting dynamic on a group such as this; a new

> person is posting more or less out of desperation, but this is

> interjected into a community which is getting on with coping. I

take

> it, though, from the relatively lack of comment that intractable

> insomnia is not suffered by many others on the list.

>

Your situation has troubled me enough that I have sought assistance

from my Australian contacts on this matter. Sincerely hope you don't

mind. The outcome is to suggest secretin. Something tells me that

this may already have been considered given the length of time you

have had to endure all this.

I found that there was one lady who had not slept for two weeks,only

the once in her life, and this was fixed with short term sleeping

pills and anti-depressants. Also with a change in the way she

approached life. Clearly her situation cannot compare to the scale

of your situation but she did go on to say that her autistic

daughter's sleep problems were inadvertantly remedied when attempting

to assist with bowel problems via secretin. Her daughter used to wake

up every hour and a half and sometimes not able to return to sleep.

Considering the GI problem, secretin could be worth a try.

I do a pretty good job of being positive if you define that as not

> sliding into total depression.... and hey, I haven't shared any of

my physical problems, but they're daunting. Keeping a sense of humor

> helps, and I have a bit of fatalism which serves me well - low

> expectations. I also vest more energy into trying to help the

world than trying to help myself; which some would say is what

sustains me, others would say is the main problem, and a wise person

might say is both.

I know where you're coming from!

> I have hidden my medical and other problems from the world. My

> accomplishments have been significant enough that I'd probably be

> lauded if my various disabilities were known. But I don't WANT to

be lauded. I don't wish to be a legend after my death. I don't wish

to interact with people in uncontrolled ways at all.

I respect these views.

> It's possible that withdrawal to a Thoreau-esque setting might be

the closest thing to an answer I'll ever come up with - not that I'm

able to do that now. My physical problems keep me shackled to my

> euphemistically named 'health' plan.

That setting is a pretty good answer imho. My husband's health has

deteriorated dramatically in recent months and we are planning to move

to a sub-tropical island off the East Australian coast in the near

future. I wish for you, the same.

You are in a very difficult situation, I acknowledge this.

>

This sounds like me, except I'm 10 years past burnout, literally.

> And doctors just roll their eyes at this stuff. They'll give you a

> sedative or an antidepressant, but are mostly lazy... don't know

how

> it is there, but here the HMO's give each doctor about 15 minutes

to

> listen to what's wrong and then decide. What ELSE is there time

for

> but pushing pills?

It's different in Australia. They chat to you as if they've known

you all their life. I miss that living in England. We had become so

used to the rushed routine of Docs over here that when we went back to

Oz quite some years ago now, it felt very weird to have the Doc spend

a whole half hour with us in consultation and he was happy and

relaxed. Chatted about his time abroad in these parts and wanted to

hear all about our time here. Remarkable in comparison! Getting

homesick now!!!

Truly wishing you a better existence there. Also wish to have been

of more help.

Regards,

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

In reply to 's post:

>

>Your situation has troubled me enough that I have sought assistance

>from my Australian contacts on this matter. Sincerely hope you don't

>mind. The outcome is to suggest secretin. Something tells me that

>this may already have been considered given the length of time you

>have had to endure all this.

Mind? I vastly appreciate your concern and help. In fact, I'd never

heard of secretin except in passing, and will now research it. I

know quite a bit about biology and medical stuff, but am very new to

considering my childhood autism as a current factor in my various

health issues. It is intriguing. For instance, I've had merry hell

with my GI tract, which is now finally paralyzed for no know reasons,

and to hear that there is a possible connection between autism and

the GI tract is a bit revolutionary for me. I will investigate

secretin in context.

>It's different in Australia. They chat to you as if they've known

>you all their life. I miss that living in England. We had become so

>used to the rushed routine of Docs over here that when we went back to

>Oz quite some years ago now, it felt very weird to have the Doc spend

>a whole half hour with us in consultation and he was happy and

>relaxed. Chatted about his time abroad in these parts and wanted to

>hear all about our time here. Remarkable in comparison! Getting

>homesick now!!!

>

>Truly wishing you a better existence there. Also wish to have been

>of more help.

Your help is a gift; I thank you. As for the travails of existence,

everyone has 'em, I guess the details are just different.

Thanks.

DJ

[Guest guest]

Hi DJ,

More advice just in. The woman who makes this suggestion apologises

if it is of no use or appears 'silly'. Her autistic son had severe

candida and terrible sleep problems for 5 years. Her son was and I

quote 'terribly bouncy and unstoppable, either that or he would just

drop where he was, from exhaustion I think!!' Once the candida was

treated(took about 6 months), then he was 'much calmer, not as

wide-eyed and going a hundred miles an hour. His speech also

improved.' This same woman's older son who has asperger's was

similar. Candida can cause a whole host of extremely serious

problems if it is in massive overgrowth in the body, and most people

don't even get symptoms of this overgrowth apart from sleep problems

an also gut issues sometimes. This woman used something like nilstat

for 2-4 weeks, cut out chocolates and sweets from her son's diet for a

month, then put him on a basically permanent acidophilus powder,high

dose(inner health brand) or similar high dose ones.

I'll continue to pass on any further input I receive.

Best Wishes,

-- In AutisticSpectrumTreeHouse , Kealolo <dw@s...> wrote:

> In reply to 's post:

>

> >

> >Your situation has troubled me enough that I have sought assistance

> >from my Australian contacts on this matter. Sincerely hope you don't

> >mind. The outcome is to suggest secretin. Something tells me that

> >this may already have been considered given the length of time you

> >have had to endure all this.

>

> Mind? I vastly appreciate your concern and help. In fact, I'd never

> heard of secretin except in passing, and will now research it. I

> know quite a bit about biology and medical stuff, but am very new to

> considering my childhood autism as a current factor in my various

> health issues. It is intriguing. For instance, I've had merry hell

> with my GI tract, which is now finally paralyzed for no know reasons,

> and to hear that there is a possible connection between autism and

> the GI tract is a bit revolutionary for me. I will investigate

> secretin in c

ontext.

>

> >It's different in Australia. They chat to you as if they've known

> >you all their life. I miss that living in England. We had become so

> >used to the rushed routine of Docs over here that when we went back to

> >Oz quite some years ago now, it felt very weird to have the Doc spend

> >a whole half hour with us in consultation and he was happy and

> >relaxed. Chatted about his time abroad in these parts and wanted to

> >hear all about our time here. Remarkable in comparison! Getting

> >homesick now!!!

> >

> >Truly wishing you a better existence there. Also wish to have been

> >of more help.

>

> Your help is a gift; I thank you. As for the travails of existence,

> everyone has 'em, I guess the details are just different.

>

> Thanks.

>

> DJ

>

>