Re: Feeling Strange

[Guest guest]

,

You are not alone. We are born and than programed to meet their

needs, not ours. They are the masters of guilt. What you long for is

the love and good relationship a child should have, instead of the

real one you got. I struggled with this for a long time when my nada

was alive. I tried to move heaven and earth just in the hope that I

may finally get what I needed from her and needless to sat that

never happened. I am now realizing, after giving up alot of me and

my life,

how deep a childs need is to get that " good " mothering relationship.

Lets face it a childs relationship is the most important one. I'm

not saying fathers aren't important, it is just different. A mother

should be the one to give everything of herself including her very

own life to protect and take care of her child. a child should be

able to feel that love and security, to know how very special they

are. Not once have any of us gotten that from our nadas, and that is

something we will always long for and could never get from any other

person on this planet. The time has pasted for that and that is not

the mothers we got. Reality checking is painful but necessary to

keep us aware of how they really are and it is alot less painful

than continuing to set ourselves up for something they will NEVER be.

[Guest guest]

, thank you for your insightful response. Indeed, she is the

master of guilt. If there were an award that could be given for this

she would have that little trophy on her mantle. The phrase below is

particularly poignant for me...

A mother

> should be the one to give everything of herself including her very

> own life to protect and take care of her child. a child should be

> able to feel that love and security, to know how very special they

> are.

Oddly enough, these are the things I yearn for most in this life...

Thank you,