Re: not BLONDE / rant & weight

[Guest guest]

Qwerty,

My nada is also obsessed with weight. The women in her family are

all very petite and I think have eating disorders. I remember my

nada eating 6 honey buns at one setting and then trying to vomit when

I was a little kid. I exercised like crazy after having my kids and

got back down to a size 8 (I am a bigger build than these women and

several inches taller). Unfortunately I have had some serious health

problems (miscarriage, hormone issues, etc.) that resulted in a quick

weight gain of 35 lbs. with no change in diet (How many hours have I

spent sobbing over this!). I have memories of my nada and other

family members gossiping about an aunt in my family who " must have

been a size 10 " after having baby number 6. So now I am the fat one

that everyone gets to talk about. They all act concerned about the

health issues, but it never fails that the first thing that is asked

is if I've been able to lose my weight yet. I always spend the

morning throwing up if I know I'm going to see family. That's

probably not normal.

Sorry my replies here are somewhat infrequent, but it's hard to find

a chance with 2 kids under the age of 5 1/2!!

le

> >

> > That absence of essential, recessive DNA appears to be the abyss,

> that place

> > where nada justifies my 'unworthiness'. There is nothing in the

> middle;

> > either you are 'like her-blonde' or you are not.

> >

> > Birth order aside, irregardless of the current species of

> dysfunction going

> > around, roles in my FOO are dictated by hair color. Anyone else

> find this

> > true?

> >

> > I am not ... blonde; not compliant, not needy of her approval

> (anymore), not

> > willing to sacrifice my young to her. My other 'not blonde'

sibling

> is

> > male, equally rebellious but in a crippling sort of way; his

> identity is the

> > clown who pretends to be blonde when nada is disappointed in

him/his

> loyalty.

> >

> > My 2 blonde siblings are the 'success' stories, in as much as

> > 'nada-mothering' goes.

> >

> > My blonde sister sacrificed her marriage (divorced when nada said

HE

> > disrespected her), put her children on the line (demanded her

> daughters attend

> > college where dishrag dad had done some construction work ...

made

> nada proud of

> > something; she sacrificed her career choice (changed her major to

> respiratory

> > therapy when nada came down with emphysema ... instead of going

to

> > Veterinarian school/her lifelong ambition.

> >

> > My youngest sibling/brother (blondest child of all) dropped out of

> school in

> > the 10th grade, a 9th grade education just like nada & fada. The

> other

> > three of us went to college (out of our own pockets-THIS is

> important), yet ~he~

> > is the 'genius' child of the family! Any irony there? This

brother

> > disparages me because nada declared that I disrespect her. ~He~

is

> executor of the

> > estates, holds power of attorney, hold the deeds to the nada-

fada

> > vehicles/mortgage/boats; even the life insurance names him as

> beneficiary.

> >

> > I am waiting for the STORM (I've already been given my

> inheritance/and taken

> > it to the DAV). ;-) <----- SINISTER GRIN Carol

> >

>