Guest guest Posted February 12, 2006 Report Share Posted February 12, 2006 I know- I guess that is why we have this group? So we can help each other through. It isn't easy- outsiders even close friends do not condone going NC with your own parents and family, but come on what are we supposed to do? I go back and forth with it and think just suck it up- go back to your " place " in the family. That is your place, too bad you didn't chose it, but it is your destiny. I should love and honor my parents no matter what. Then I think- no no no. Go and find your own friends Dad- we already had so much time t/g. I gave you so much attention, I tried to give you what you want, I needed you so much and it got to a point where you didn't even have the answers anymore. So here I am out here on my own. Just get your own life! So yes, I feel like I should at least write back or give him a little attention b/c he isn't mean spirited it is just his nature. But then I am like no b/c it is so toxic to me at a level I don't even realize. For the first time in forever I got up today and said hey what do I want to do with the rest of my life? It took me 1.5 hours to think what I might like to do tomorrow instead of my stupid job in corporate America. That means I don't know myself- that voice inside is scared it doesn't know how to answer. That is frightening! So going forward NC will help that voice get stronger b/c there will be less noise keeping it quiet. That is why NC and blocking toxic ppl is important. I love learning this. It is SO hard. Thanks for writing back! b > > Hi Bridget > " He doesn't GET IT. He just thinks she is my baby and I will send > her photos and she'll call me again. It breaks my heart. " > > I can so relate. I recently had a short phone conversation w fada, bc I > need advise about my car. I felt the same way. I felt sorry for him, but > there is nothing I can do for him. on the phone, I mentioned that I have > been nc and I hope he understands, but that I have been so damaged by all of > them in the foo, that I need time. He gave me a short lecture on the > importance of being nice to people. he wants me to email someone in the foo > who had a birthday last week. I don't care, that person has not in the last > 10 years paid attention to me or my birthday. According to fada, it is my > responsibility to be nice and mend relationships w people. > > I got off the phone, but I felt so bewildered and guilty and wierd, is > this FOG? What was I feeling? whatever it was, it felt wierd. > And made me all the more appreciative of being nc, i wish i had gone nc > as a teenager and emancipated myself, i would have been eligable for a > foster family. > > How can someone like fada get to his age and not understand that it > takes more to make a relationship than just to keep sending someone emails > for their birthday (or in your case, photos of the superbowl)?? I just > don't get them. > > Katrina. > > > --------------------------------- > Yahoo! Mail > Use Photomail to share photos without annoying attachments. > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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