When submission is not enough.

[Guest guest]

I envy your courage tlblack,

I was the sort of teen who cowered/retreated/saved myself if only

temporarily, and convinced myself that what nada wanted me to do was

right/wise/sane/selfless. I dropped latin for study hall in HS; this because

nada told me that

going to college was a lazy way to delay getting a real job. CarolC

In a message dated 2/2/2006 6:31:03 PM Eastern Standard Time,

tlblack2006@... writes:

Hey, does anybody else remember something like this happening to them

growing up?

Your nada wants you to do something and applys nada pressure to get you to

do it (in my

case raging at me for days/nights sometimes). Then you say, " fine, I'm so

sick of this, I'll

do anything you say, just leave me ALONE. "

She says(calmly) " Well, is that what you want to do? "

You say, " No, but I'll do it if you will leave me alone. "

So she beings applying nada pressure to get you to not only do what she

wants, but to

actually try to get you to WANT to do it--or at least say that you do.

This was more of an issue for me as a teenager. I know I could have just

said, " yes, that's

what I want too, " but I was too angry and rightfully so. She used to stand

over my bed

screaming at me until 2-3am (on school nights). When I defied her like

this, it just sent

her off and she'd rage at me for days, attacking in any way possible.

I actually can't remember how any of these episodes were resolved--what made

her stop

raging. But at least on one occasion, I held out until I got what I

wanted--so I guess I

" won. " She could have easily just forced me to do what she wanted (drop a

highschool

class I was not getting an " A " in.) but she never got my " permission " and

never did it.

Weird, huh?

[Guest guest]

Hey, does anybody else remember something like this happening to them growing

up?

Your nada wants you to do something and applys nada pressure to get you to do it

(in my

case raging at me for days/nights sometimes). Then you say, " fine, I'm so sick

of this, I'll

do anything you say, just leave me ALONE. "

She says(calmly) " Well, is that what you want to do? "

You say, " No, but I'll do it if you will leave me alone. "

So she beings applying nada pressure to get you to not only do what she wants,

but to

actually try to get you to WANT to do it--or at least say that you do.

This was more of an issue for me as a teenager. I know I could have just said,

" yes, that's

what I want too, " but I was too angry and rightfully so. She used to stand over

my bed

screaming at me until 2-3am (on school nights). When I defied her like this, it

just sent

her off and she'd rage at me for days, attacking in any way possible.

I actually can't remember how any of these episodes were resolved--what made her

stop

raging. But at least on one occasion, I held out until I got what I wanted--so

I guess I

" won. " She could have easily just forced me to do what she wanted (drop a

highschool

class I was not getting an " A " in.) but she never got my " permission " and never

did it.

Weird, huh?