a rock and a hard place

[Guest guest]

I just saw this quote from bewildered, a new post-er:

'I couldn't withstand how bad it had got, i wasn't strong enough,

> but I can't live with the consequences either. Every choice is a bad

> choice.'

Bewildered, I just wanted you to know that one of the terrible

masterful skills that BPD's have is to put us between a rock and a hard

place! They are genuises at it. You are not alone in this

experience. The trick is to develop such a great sense of self, that

you rise above the apparent 'options' on the table, and don't feel bad

either way.

A common BPD rock-hard place thing is to issue a lifetime of subtle put-

downs, so that you are sensitive about a certain subject. Then, in

front of a crowd, they issue yet another subtle put-down, that doesn't

sound so bad in front of everyone else. Something like 'when are you

going to get married and give me grandchildren? I guess you just

intimidate everyone you meet.' Just for example. Then, the unknowing

KO loses control, and responds in an angry tone. And looks like a

demon, because she was just being a mom! Or, if the KO does not

respond, then a very wrongful impression of him/her has been issued to

the crowd of people, ie, that they think they are better than everyone

else, and therefore will never deserve their own family. This isn't a

true story, by the way, it's just the best thing I could come up with.

My point at any rate is hang in there. The experience you describe is

quite common to KOs.

Charlie