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Re: OT-new baby blues

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Amy,

I hope you surprise yourself. I have.

One of the moms at ERic's school babysits a 6-month-old baby. Cute little girl,

wonderful disposition. Every day I expose myself to this kid, testing the

water...

Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Debbie might as well be holding a sack of flour for all

that bundle does for me. Stirs NO latent maternal longings whatsoever.

Good luck tomorrow.

Jacquie

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> I hope you surprise yourself. I have.

>

> One of the moms at ERic's school babysits a 6-month-old baby. Cute little

girl, wonderful disposition. Every day I expose myself to this kid, testing

the water...

>

> Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Debbie might as well be holding a sack of flour

for all that bundle does for me. Stirs NO latent maternal longings

whatsoever.

>

> Good luck tomorrow.

I too wish Amy luck, but I LOVE babies. Could have a zillion, except I am

46 and no longer have a viable husband. Probably I never did have a viable

husband, but I pretended he was for many years and I got five kids out of

the deal which isn't bad. I suppose it would be better if more of them were

NT, but I love my kids, weird or otherwise. Mostly weird. Even the NT ones

have odd role models. Robbie's goal is to be autistic like Putter.

Salli

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>

>>I hope you surprise yourself. I have.

Well, I did not surprise myself. I was just as depressed as I thought I

would be. Of course, I love babies and both of my pregnancies were good and

I had easy, quick labors both times, so it is easy for me to want to do it

again!

Of course, while I was holding the baby (he is GORGEOUS btw) I had some

anxiety and I could see where I would be a little bit of a wreck if I had

another one now (out of the question anyways). I would always be looking

for problems and that would be no fun.

Amy H

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>

>

>What is labor???

>Sue

I wouldn't know I had c-sections with both!

Wife to

Mom to Ben 4.5 (aka Godzilla)

On call milk machine to Abby 15 mths (aka stinkerbell)

" Some days you are the Bug, some days you are the Windshield "

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In a message dated 10/29/01 6:55:59 AM Pacific Standard Time,

ajhelmuth@... writes:

> Of course, while I was holding the baby (he is GORGEOUS btw) I had some

> anxiety and I could see where I would be a little bit of a wreck if I had

> another one now (out of the question anyways). I would always be looking

> for problems and that would be no fun.

>

>

I went through this. And for about 2 months nearly cried every time I saw a

baby in public. I told my husband about it, (under the false assumption that

he wanted another, b/c he would point out cute babies to me, and wanted a

boy) and he said he didn't want to mess up what we had. He was in no mood to

go through late night feedings anymore, (he was wonderful, getting up to make

juice when I nursed) and didn't feel the need to have a boy. It took us 7

years as it was after we were married to decide we wanted to change our lives

as it was.

My pregnancies were uneventful, yet unrewarding too. I didn't particularly

like being pregnant, (although, I remember some nice moments) but I didn't

hate it either.

My mother told me every time she held a baby, she wanted another. She ended

up with 5, but wished she had more.

What I am saying is that this is a natural occurrence, and be aware this too

will pass.

It's only a feeling for a few days, is it worth a lifetime? Not that I don't

enjoy being a Mom, but I could not make my baby a middle child either.

Barb

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In a message dated 10/30/01 9:54:56 PM Central Standard Time,

nospam@... writes:

> It sucks!

>

> Wanna see the video?

>

> ;-)

>

> Penny - who was in 12 hours of complete and utter PAIN

I don't have it on tape, but put me through 18 hours of hmmm, well 18

hours of labor. About 45 minutes of pain. My labors seem to be backwards.

They are getting longer, oh yuck!!! NOT looking forward to next time;)

le

married to Isaac

SAHM to

Marisa 6

Jordan 3

Christian 2

1-26-01 cvr 5-30-01

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>>>But I never went into a 'normal'

> labor to know what it would have been like.

> Sue

It sucks!

Wanna see the video?

;-)

Penny - who was in 12 hours of complete and utter PAIN.

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In a message dated 10/31/01 8:14:40 AM Central Standard Time,

smgaska@... writes:

> . No chance for error on his due date

> either because I had miscarried 7 weeks before he was conceived

Oh so you KNOW. Ok. I am sorry about the miscarriage.

le

married to Isaac

SAHM to

Marisa 6

Jordan 3

Christian 2

1-26-01 cvr 5-30-01

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In a message dated 10/31/01 8:36:08 AM Central Standard Time,

smgaska@... writes:

> Thanks le. I look at it this way now. If I hadn't miscarried, I

> wouldn't have ! He may be a handful and quite the puzzle to figure

> out, but he's also a really wonderful little boy and I couldn't imagine him

> not being here

I feel that way about my 4 when I get " those " looks when we go somewhere. I

am happy you have as well.

le

married to Isaac

SAHM to

Marisa 6

Jordan 3

Christian 2

1-26-01 cvr 5-30-01

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> I'm just wondering if a natural labor might have been easier (I learned

> afterward that induced is horrible).

Sue:

Induced labor is indeed horrible. I am a natural for natural labor, no

problems, great births, etc. Never induced.

But Putter's placenta would not come out. So I basically got labor induced

for a stupid placenta (boy, was I mad!) and I thought those contractions

were just awful. They seem to take over your body in a really different

kind of way.

Salli

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Yeah, pretty sure. I knew I was pregnant the day after my period was due

and he already weighed 9.3 when he was born. I was only 5'3 " and 112 lbs

when I got pregnant and my dh wasn't that big of a man either. I was huge

out front with both babies. was scheduled to be delivered a week

before his date and was 8.7 already. No chance for error on his due date

either because I had miscarried 7 weeks before he was conceived.

Sue

Re: Re: OT-new baby blues

> In a message dated 10/31/01 7:45:49 AM Central Standard Time,

> smgaska@... writes:

>

>

> > Of course, he was already 41 weeks so

> > who knows how much longer I would have gone on my own before he would

have

> > decided he finally wasn't comfortable and wanted out

>

> were they sure of the edd? Spontaneous labor is suppossed to be easier,

> because the baby comes when he/she is ready. If you try to force a baby

out

> early, it could be harmful to the baby, like " late " may be late in docs

mind

> only. It could actually be premature and have breathing difficulties. I

was

> induced 2 x by having my water broke (no pit). My last 2 were

homebirths.

> No interventions whatsoever.

> le

> married to Isaac

> SAHM to

> Marisa 6

> Jordan 3

> Christian 2

> 1-26-01 cvr 5-30-01

>

>

>

>

>

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Thanks le. I look at it this way now. If I hadn't miscarried, I

wouldn't have ! He may be a handful and quite the puzzle to figure

out, but he's also a really wonderful little boy and I couldn't imagine him

not being here!

Sue

----- Original Message ----- > Oh so you KNOW. Ok. I am sorry about the

miscarriage.

> le

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In a message dated 10/31/2001 3:11:12 PM Eastern Standard Time,

tloggie@... writes:

> I had quick labor. The longest was 6 hours the shortest was 15 minutes. And

> no pain just push, push and out they came.

>

> Sorry Ron.

>

> Lori

>

No need to apologize...when I heard Carol Burnett describe having a baby was

like taking your upper lip and pulling it over your head...well, I was still

drinking then...figured I could do it....OUCH!!!!!

since then, I have nothing but respect for anyone who has had a baby....

Ron

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I had quick labor. The longest was 6 hours the shortest was 15 minutes. And no

pain just push, push and out they came.

Sorry Ron.

Lori

Re: OT-new baby blues

>>>But I never went into a 'normal'

> labor to know what it would have been like.

> Sue

It sucks!

Wanna see the video?

;-)

Penny - who was in 12 hours of complete and utter PAIN.

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Amy,

How did it go?

I hope you're not depressed.

I have been around babies a lot lately, too.

I have absolutely no urge to have any more. I find it bizarre that I don't.

I think babies are cute, and I adore them so long as they live with someone

else.

What does depress me is when I think about the fact that I mustn't have more

children, given the statistics. (This applies just to me, and moreso with

my tendency to ovulate a million eggs at a time, thank you.) I just could

not risk having another autistic child. I can't. My body can't. My head

can't. And my heart is too broken to even wonder.

I am done having babies.

Grace

OT-new baby blues

> My best friend finally had her baby today (one week late). He was 9 lbs

10

> oz. Can you imagine? Ugh. Glad he didn't pass through MY body!

>

> I am going to see him tomorrow and I will be thrilled to death for Kathy

but

> I know I will come home depressed. I hate to think that I will never have

> that experience again. Makes me sad.

>

> Amy H

> Kepler 4 ASD and Bethany 6 NT

> " There is so much good in the worst of us, and so much bad in the best of

> us, that it behooves all of us not to talk about the rest of us. " ~

> Louis son

>

>

>

> _________________________________________________________________

> Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp

>

>

>

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17 hours of pitocin-induced labor - - - hello Sydney.

6.5 hours of double pitocin-induced labor with NO EPIDUROL - - - - hello

C-SECTION.... and then - - - I'm told, HELLO MADISON.

Can you tell? The girl just didn't like making it easy for me, from the

getgo LOL!! I am still not convinced that Madison wasn't switched at birth

LOL!!!

Grace

Re: OT-new baby blues

>

>

> >

> > >

> > >

> > >What is labor???

> > >Sue

> > I wouldn't know I had c-sections with both!

> >

> >

> > Wife to

> > Mom to Ben 4.5 (aka Godzilla)

> > On call milk machine to Abby 15 mths (aka stinkerbell)

> >

> > " Some days you are the Bug, some days you are the Windshield "

> >

> >

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> My pregnancies were uneventful, yet unrewarding too. I didn't

particularly

> like being pregnant, (although, I remember some nice moments) but I didn't

> hate it either.

Barb,

I had an uneventful pregnancy also, despite all the Labor and Delivery trips

in the middle of the night or during the day. (12 trips in all, I think?)

Just had a lot of contractions, but became known as the " girl with the steel

uterus " . I told them and told them, I am not going into labor... but nobody

believed me since I was having 20 something contractions per hour.

With the twins in the tummy, and looking like I was pregnant with 5 babies,

I made it to 40 weeks and had to be induced, at that, because my BP was

beginning to rise, and my stretch marks looked like I would explode any

minute. 60-something lbs of weight added on, too.

To say I didn't like pregnancy would be an understatement.

To say I hated being pregnant - - - well, if not for the fact that I got my

two girls due to being pregnant, would ALSO be an understatement LOL!!

Grace

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> Me too. And babies leave me flat. Don't do a damn thing for me. They're

like little needy larvae. Wasn't always like that, though. Up until about

a year ago, every time I saw one of the things I was plunged into depression

all over again... Now, I'm immune to the little slobbery buggers.

>

Jacquie,

Me too, too.

It's not just the baby's needs either.

For me, just thinking about the first year...... of wondering..... of

freaking out every time the child should not meet my gaze.... trying to

analyze everything to see if... if.... oh geez, no thank you.

I don't mind the slobbery mess though LOL. Immobile critters are easy to

clean up after. But I am quite tired of being needed too much. It's been

three years now that I have lived with two " babies " with the behavior of a

one year old.... just runs a lot faster and is a whole lot stronger than

most one year olds. No thank. Enough is enough is enough... is enough.

The last time I had true, strong baby PULLS was when my girls were about

6-18 months. Those were good times. In fact, I thought that I wanted at

least 5 kids, and the more twins, the better.

I am not ashamed to admit - - I was wrong.

Grace

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> -who hopes she hasn't offended any parents of infants, since she was once

a

> doting parent of an infant herself. >>

> --I don't know what to say....oh here goes. How many do you have? I have

> 4(I know Salli for one still has me beat!!) and I love my little slobbery

> bugger. I cannot imagine my life without anyone one of my slobbery

buggers!!!

I am very fond of babies (much easier than fourteen year olds) and I would

be delighted to have another child but I can say that easily as I am ancient

and husbandless.

Oh, and also has five.

Salli

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In a message dated 11/2/01 10:13:56 AM Central Standard Time,

vhunnius@... writes:

> I do agree. If I'd had the mothering experience that everyone else gets the

> first time around, the autistic child might not have shaken me so much...

>

>

I can understand this. I have 2 older and 1 younger that seem nt. Marisa

was an extremely colicky baby and I was sure for awhile that I didn't want

another. After 2yrs I decided I didn't want another colicky baby and prayed

each time I was pregnant the baby wouldn't be. I have about 2-4 weeks of

colick with each one...better than the 3 months I had with Marisa. I guess

God thought I said I didn;t want another like Marisa (read: GIRL) and so I

have all younger boys. Hmmm, maybe if I ask for another like Marisa, it will

be a very colicky girl. Hmmm, I'll have to think bout that one, lol. No one

wants to pray for colick, lol.

I'm looking over at Puff watching his beloved veggie tales, poking their eyes

out. Can't help but laugh at the scene. I do wonder why in a family of

hispanics, we hav blonde haired, blue eyed Puff, and Brown hair, blue eyed

. Once when I took the kids somewhere Puff didn't want to be ( I think

I was pregnant), I was carrying him while he screamed and people looked at me

like I had kidnapped him. LOL, THAT is funny now.

le

married to Isaac

SAHM to

Marisa 6

Jordan 3

Christian 2

1-26-01 cvr 5-30-01

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> --I don't know what to say....oh here goes. How many do you have?

I have only one. I wanted three. We planned for three. Three was what we were

going to have...

But then...

-whatever that condition is called where you vomit for all 9 months

-an 85lb weight gain

-bed rest

-2 hospitalizations because my skin was leaking fluid

-pre-eclampsia

-polyhydramnios, a dangerous condition where there is far too much amniotic

fluid

-whatever that condition is called where your baby NEVER drops because he's too

big and your pelvis is too small

-monthly ultrasounds and non-stress tests

-a non-emergency c-section where I begged them to give me an epidural and they

gave me a spinal instead, which resulted in left-side paralysis for about 3

hours after I woke up

-multiple uterine infections

-a breastfeeding attempt from hell

-postpartum depression with an episode of psychosis

-autism

Can't do it again. I just CAN'T. And I cried for two years because I can't.

Physically, I could, although I'm high-risk. Emotionally, I CAN'T. So becoming

immune to babies is my heart's way of dealing with that.

I have

> 4(I know Salli for one still has me beat!!) and I love my little slobbery

> bugger. I cannot imagine my life without anyone one of my slobbery buggers!!!

And I envy you.

Jacquie

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> And I know for a fact that Jacquie isn't getting rid of either. She is

> just choosing not to have anymore. Besides, if you hear her stories about

> her pregnancy, you really wouldn't wonder why LOL. My pregnancy was

> torture, but hers was absolutely OUT THERE.

Aw thanks, Grace. I just listed off the WHOLE THING. I've never done that

before. It WAS absolutely OUT THERE, wasn't it???

Jacquie

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>You may not miss what you don't have on a daily basis,

> but don't you ever wonder what could be? If I ever said that I wouldn't have

> more, I would feel like I lost something.

Absolutely all the time I wonder what could be. And I feel like I HAVE lost

something.

Jacquie

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