Re: Do symptoms get worse as they get older? Drug interactions?

July 9, 2007

People do seem to go to extremes as they get older, don't they? My

grandma was on the nice end of the extreme. She would tell how she

was in Kmart and having trouble with her shoe and some " nice young

girl " came up and helped her with it. Then she'd say how people are

just so nice to the elderly these days.

She has since passed. This was my nada's mom! My nada thinks the

world stinks and people are crooked.

*sigh*

Sometimes life seems *so hard* to me.

-Deanna

>

> Hi Everyone -

>

> I'm just wondering - do people notice that their NADA has

> gotten " worse " with age?

>

> I've been thinking about my mother's behavior recently and how it

> compares to when she was younger. She's currently 75 years old. Right

> now, it's like she has lost any bit of self restraint she ever had.

> She just snaps at everyone. She talks on the phone nonstop. After a

> 15 minute rant about everything that is wrong in her life, she may ask

> me how my daughter is. It's almost like she's manic....

>

> Could her BPD symptoms be getting worse with all the drugs she's

> taking? She can't sleep and she claims she " has pain " and is taking 4

> Valium and 3-4 Percocet during the day. Can these actually make a

> person with BPD more manic, depressed, etc?

>

> Thanks for your help.

>

> D.

>

July 9, 2007

Absolutely. When I compare letters she wrote with those she sends now, it's

like 2 different people. it has, however, made detaching easier in some ways.

She can't 'hide behind the mask' as well. -Leslye

jerseygirl5555 wrote: Hi Everyone -

I'm just wondering - do people notice that their NADA has

gotten " worse " with age?

I've been thinking about my mother's behavior recently and how it

compares to when she was younger. She's currently 75 years old. Right

now, it's like she has lost any bit of self restraint she ever had.

She just snaps at everyone. She talks on the phone nonstop. After a

15 minute rant about everything that is wrong in her life, she may ask

me how my daughter is. It's almost like she's manic....

Could her BPD symptoms be getting worse with all the drugs she's

taking? She can't sleep and she claims she " has pain " and is taking 4

Valium and 3-4 Percocet during the day. Can these actually make a

person with BPD more manic, depressed, etc?

Thanks for your help.

D.

---------------------------------

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July 10, 2007

Yes! Leslye you said it perfectly,

I think the detaching is easier all the way around because of the

deterioration that seems to come with age for nada. Mine is 57. SHe is

a shell of her former self which makes it easier for me to consider

nada almost dead and some alien in her body because she has completely

lost the ability to hide her craziness from the world. It is like the

part of her that cares (even about her prescious image) just got tired

and left. Now she is a GIANT pool of misery and self hatred that barely

exists and seems just to be waiting to die. So much easier to look at

her life and know not to take what this obviously damaged person says

or does personally.

>

> Absolutely. When I compare letters she wrote with those she sends

now, it's like 2 different people. it has, however, made detaching

easier in some ways. She can't 'hide behind the mask' as well. -

Leslye

July 10, 2007

Wow - you both said it. This is definitely not the mother that I

used to know. Let's face it - she's always had BPD and she's always

been a bit crazy - but now, she can't hide it.

I always felt guilty about not loving her anymore (the way I used

to) - but I don't anymore. She really has changed and it's getting

to the point where no one can deal with her.

D.

> >

> > Absolutely. When I compare letters she wrote with those she

sends

> now, it's like 2 different people. it has, however, made detaching

> easier in some ways. She can't 'hide behind the mask' as well. -

> Leslye

>

July 11, 2007

I think that things with my nada have also gotten worse w/ age. My

mom is 58 and i'm 20, at first i wasn't sure if I just didn't

recognize the BPD patterns in her behaivor when i was younger (I've

only really been aware of BPD for the past few years), but looking

back and comparing her behaivior from when i was little to how

things are now, I think they have definately gotten much more

extreme...and I'm getting much more frustrated.

>

> Hi Everyone -

>

> I'm just wondering - do people notice that their NADA has

> gotten " worse " with age?

>

> I've been thinking about my mother's behavior recently and how it

> compares to when she was younger. She's currently 75 years old.

Right

> now, it's like she has lost any bit of self restraint she ever

had.

> She just snaps at everyone. She talks on the phone nonstop.

After a

> 15 minute rant about everything that is wrong in her life, she may

ask

> me how my daughter is. It's almost like she's manic....

>

> Could her BPD symptoms be getting worse with all the drugs she's

> taking? She can't sleep and she claims she " has pain " and is

taking 4

> Valium and 3-4 Percocet during the day. Can these actually make a

> person with BPD more manic, depressed, etc?

>

> Thanks for your help.

>

> D.

>

July 12, 2007

I know things with my nada have gotten worse since my father passed away almost

4 yrs. ago. The self-absorbtion hits a new high almost daily. I also think

there is some dementia, our nada has Parkinson's disease (diagnosed 6 mo. ago)

and there is a form of dementia that goes along with that. Nada is going on 90

and I am 60, my sister is 58. Nada has longjevity on her side, her sister live

to be 99 yrs 7 mo. to the day. ALL I SAY IS " GOD HELP US THROUGH THIS "

Nada's neurologist wanted to double her medication for Parkinson's and she

refuses to take it, and threatens to stop taking the initial dosage because " it

isn't helping her anymore " NO, of course it isn't helping because she is not

getting enough of the medication!!!!!!!!!! DAAAAAA Everything is about money

with nada, and she refuses to pay more money out for a double dose.

When I was young I didn't understand the fits of temper nada had and the abuse

she inflicted on me (not my sister) during these times, when I became a teenager

it got worse, when I became a young woman and married, and knew a little about

menopause I blamed these times on menopause, as I have gotten older and have

done some reading I blamed these events on mental illness, and now that I am

middle aged and have done a lot more reading, and know about BPD, I know there

is mental illness there. I honestly feel that the more severe the mental

illness is when nada is younger greatly increases as she becomes older due to

other health issues, and the EXTREME fear of being ABANDONED. if only we could

get them to understand that THEY are the ones driving everyone away because of

their behavior. Janie

extremelyfrustrated07 wrote:

I think that things with my nada have also gotten worse w/ age. My

mom is 58 and i'm 20, at first i wasn't sure if I just didn't

recognize the BPD patterns in her behaivor when i was younger (I've

only really been aware of BPD for the past few years), but looking

back and comparing her behaivior from when i was little to how

things are now, I think they have definately gotten much more

extreme...and I'm getting much more frustrated.

>

> Hi Everyone -

>

> I'm just wondering - do people notice that their NADA has

> gotten " worse " with age?

>

> I've been thinking about my mother's behavior recently and how it

> compares to when she was younger. She's currently 75 years old.

Right

> now, it's like she has lost any bit of self restraint she ever

had.

> She just snaps at everyone. She talks on the phone nonstop.

After a

> 15 minute rant about everything that is wrong in her life, she may

ask

> me how my daughter is. It's almost like she's manic....

>

> Could her BPD symptoms be getting worse with all the drugs she's

> taking? She can't sleep and she claims she " has pain " and is

taking 4

> Valium and 3-4 Percocet during the day. Can these actually make a

> person with BPD more manic, depressed, etc?

>

> Thanks for your help.

>

> D.

>

July 12, 2007

When their illness starts to yank you around as well as them, it's

time to swim to shore. Let the storm rage without tossing your

around, too. Save yourself. The emotional roller coaster of a

family member with BPD has an impact on your health and well-being.

It's good you're here -- you can figure out how to untangle yourself

from her dysfunction, free yourself to live your own life without

the upheaval they bring in. You have rights, too. The right to a

peaceful life of your own making......

-Kyla

> >

> > Hi Everyone -

> >

> > I'm just wondering - do people notice that their NADA has

> > gotten " worse " with age?

> >

> > I've been thinking about my mother's behavior recently and how

it

> > compares to when she was younger. She's currently 75 years

old.

> Right

> > now, it's like she has lost any bit of self restraint she ever

> had.

> > She just snaps at everyone. She talks on the phone nonstop.

> After a

> > 15 minute rant about everything that is wrong in her life, she

may

> ask

> > me how my daughter is. It's almost like she's manic....

> >

> > Could her BPD symptoms be getting worse with all the drugs she's

> > taking? She can't sleep and she claims she " has pain " and is

> taking 4

> > Valium and 3-4 Percocet during the day. Can these actually make

a

> > person with BPD more manic, depressed, etc?

> >

> > Thanks for your help.

> >

> > D.

> >

>

July 12, 2007

Hi, I don't write that often, but have to say this is something I have

observed myself. My mom is 70 and I look after her. She mixed her tabs

(valium, prozac and any other tabs she could get) with alcohol. She was

definately manic with the concoction and out of control. With age, my

therapist has described her as the worst of BPD. She no longer drinks, as of

+-6 years, and has not had any medication for 1yr. She is much better off

the tabs than on. Her BPD symptoms are to the T, and have become much more

obvious with age. She is completely wrapped up in her own world and wants.

She acts oblivious to anything going on around her. I also wonder if nagging

is a BPD thing. She will continue on and on about something until it gets

done, then pounce on me with the next thing, and there is always something.

Recently I find myself feeling quite morbid about the fact that it would be

so nice to have a grandmother around who knits the kids something, or helps!

She does nothing, just sits around looking very miserable, and wishing for

something else. We have to treat her as one of the kids, and lay down the

same rules, as it is as though she has lost all her social skills. The way I

understand it is that everything is personal for the BPD person, and what

gets replayed over and over in the mind is what sticks, and it is all

negative. Without any attempt to control the negative thoughts, they

eventually take control and the behavior is set.

July 12, 2007

I think when they get older (my nada is almost 90) as I have said before that

they have been so negative for so long, and so self-absorbed for so long that

their brains only function when they are talking or doing for me, me, me.

Anything that is positive to us makes us look like idiots to them, because they

are also " all knowing " My nada sits around and does nothing all the time, she

has no ambition or inclination to do anything. She complains about this friend

she has from church keeping her on the phone for hours on end, and yet she

thinks nothing of doing the same thing to my sister and I. Double standards are

another of their characteristics. AND...........believe me it doesn't get

easier!!!!!!!

claudine bowyer wrote: Hi, I don't write

that often, but have to say this is something I have