Anxiety-blunting bad habits (was Re: (Article) Why people with Aspergers seem so awkward around others

[Guest guest]

Luxenburg wrote:

<< One thing I don't know how many of you have experienced: it has

taken me practically forever just to figure out that sensory issues are

a major stressor for me, and that I don't actually *like* being in

groups - and groups may be as few as three or four, depending on who

they are. There was always some other reason to blame the tension,

irritability, depression on, and I would go to meetings and parties and

devour the refreshments to blunt my anxiety - but I figured I had an

eating problem, not a socializing problem. >>

If it's any comfort, it took me forever to figure it out too. Sigh.

For you it was the buffet table.

For me, it was the bar *and* the buffet table. Did I say the bar?

Both work to blunt anxiety... sorta.

Both lead to unhealthy addictions... definitely.

Both help to pack on the pounds... most definitely.

Best,

~CJ

[Guest guest]

> Luxenburg wrote:

> << One thing I don't know how many of you have experienced: it has

> taken me practically forever just to figure out that sensory issues are

> a major stressor for me, and that I don't actually *like* being in

> groups - and groups may be as few as three or four, depending on who

> they are. There was always some other reason to blame the tension,

> irritability, depression on, and I would go to meetings and parties and

> devour the refreshments to blunt my anxiety - but I figured I had an

> eating problem, not a socializing problem. >>

>

> If it's any comfort, it took me forever to figure it out too. Sigh.

I've found just the opposite -- sort of.

I always isolated myself from groups ... including my family when I was a teen.

[They would sit around *every* night and watch whatever was on TV. I'd read or

do homework or art projects in my room. They'd teasingly call me a hermit.] I

continued to isolate until I divorced my first husband, when I had no choice but

be social.

Still, it wasn't until I moved to Boston where I found people I could be

comfortable with. And there are lots of them ... friends I know from my work

with parents of highly gifted kids, some people from my synagogue, and others. I

still stay away from most groups, but when I'm with " my people " I am very

comfortable.

--Liz

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