Guest guest Posted April 14, 2010 Report Share Posted April 14, 2010 Very interesting, yes the three step work very well at least in short period.I used very similar things to ignore my negativity and do something valuable at that moment.However, after a period, the unaddressed negativity come back to haunt me, I wonder this might be blind point of ACT, everything have positive and shortcomings by the way.In ancient time, there is method --Al-chemistry, which honors everything as divine, positive and negative are mind are just concepts. everything happen to us tell us something valuable, need to be integrated into wholeness.Just a few thoughts> >> > Everyone,> > I have been reading this list for nearly a year now and many gems have been provided by your wisdom and experience. For that I am grateful. But while I've been reading your posts and appreciating them in the moment, I haven't been putting them into practice. > > > > Today though I'm coming out of the shadows because my own specific issue has reached a point where I can't tolerate it any more. So I need to tell someone what's going on in my head without the fear that they will think I'm weird, weak, unstable, pathetic, etc...'cause frankly those are all the terms I use. And therein lies the problem.> > > > I am my own worst bully and I can't figure out how to stop it. It just keeps getting worse. A decade ago, they were just thoughts in my head. Now, I actually verbalize them - it's almost like I have tourettes, the outbursts are getting so powerful and uncontrollable.> > > > Let me illustrate my point by telling you about the last week. Last week, I made some statements about someone I work with who happened to be in an office across the hall and undoubtedly heard. After realizing this, I barely made it through the next hour or so until I could leave for lunch. Then, I proceeded to yell at myself with such force (and profanity I might add) that my throat started getting a bit raw. Since then, the outbursts have continued with me struggling to keep them from happening in public places. Literally the first thing that pops into my head when I wake up in the morning is a mental image of the event last week intermixed with the thought "I hate you - you're mean and rotten". This continues throughout the day. I could be immersed in something and then suddenly think of the event which triggers the thought instantaneously with an outburst of words about my rottenness. > > > > This verbal bullying has been happening for a while, but not with the intensity of this past week...and I feel like I'm about to break because I can't get a grip. It all happens so fast and with such intensity that I can't find the strength to ACT. And I'm not exactly sure how to anyway. And there's a part of me that doesn't even want to try any more. I feel like saying, "fine, I am what you say I am" and be done with it all.> > > > I'm not even sure what I'm trying to do here with this post. Part confession, part advice-seeking, part acceptance-seeking, a search for me-too's so I don't feel so alone? The most pressing thing for me right now is to apply the ACT principles when this happens, but I can't think clearly enough in the moment to do it. I need a 1, 2, 3 formula to follow if there is such a thing. No time to work through the Get Out of Your Mind workbook at the moment to figure it out on my own. > > > > Can anyone help me with a workable formula or with other issues within this post?> > > > Thanks for being a place where I can rest this junk for a while, and for any help you might provide.> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 14, 2010 Report Share Posted April 14, 2010 , what do you mean "ignore"? what about step 1? accept "negative" feelings first, or in the midst of action. what happens when you fully accept some negativity? i am no guru, but here's one way i learned: take any negative feeling and breathe it right into your Heart... what happens? jason To: ACT_for_the_Public Sent: Wed, April 14, 2010 9:05:12 PMSubject: Re: Three steps Very interesting, yes the three step work very well at least in short period.I used very similar things to ignore my negativity and do something valuable at that moment.However, after a period, the unaddressed negativity come back to haunt me, I wonder this might be blind point of ACT, everything have positive and shortcomings by the way.In ancient time, there is method --Al-chemistry, which honors everything as divine, positive and negative are mind are just concepts. everything happen to us tell us something valuable, need to be integrated into wholeness.Just a few thoughts> >> > Everyone,> > I have been reading this list for nearly a year now and many gems have been provided by your wisdom and experience. For that I am grateful. But while I've been reading your posts and appreciating them in the moment, I haven't been putting them into practice. > > > > Today though I'm coming out of the shadows because my own specific issue has reached a point where I can't tolerate it any more. So I need to tell someone what's going on in my head without the fear that they will think I'm weird, weak, unstable, pathetic, etc...'cause frankly those are all the terms I use. And therein lies the problem.> > > > I am my own worst bully and I can't figure out how to stop it. It just keeps getting worse. A decade ago, they were just thoughts in my head. Now, I actually verbalize them - it's almost like I have tourettes, the outbursts are getting so powerful and uncontrollable.> > > > Let me illustrate my point by telling you about the last week. Last week, I made some statements about someone I work with who happened to be in an office across the hall and undoubtedly heard. After realizing this, I barely made it through the next hour or so until I could leave for lunch. Then, I proceeded to yell at myself with such force (and profanity I might add) that my throat started getting a bit raw. Since then, the outbursts have continued with me struggling to keep them from happening in public places. Literally the first thing that pops into my head when I wake up in the morning is a mental image of the event last week intermixed with the thought "I hate you - you're mean and rotten". This continues throughout the day. I could be immersed in something and then suddenly think of the event which triggers the thought instantaneously with an outburst of words about my rottenness. > > > > This verbal bullying has been happening for a while, but not with the intensity of this past week...and I feel like I'm about to break because I can't get a grip. It all happens so fast and with such intensity that I can't find the strength to ACT. And I'm not exactly sure how to anyway. And there's a part of me that doesn't even want to try any more. I feel like saying, "fine, I am what you say I am" and be done with it all.> > > > I'm not even sure what I'm trying to do here with this post. Part confession, part advice-seeking, part acceptance-seeking, a search for me-too's so I don't feel so alone? The most pressing thing for me right now is to apply the ACT principles when this happens, but I can't think clearly enough in the moment to do it. I need a 1, 2, 3 formula to follow if there is such a thing. No time to work through the Get Out of Your Mind workbook at the moment to figure it out on my own. > > > > Can anyone help me with a workable formula or with other issues within this post?> > > > Thanks for being a place where I can rest this junk for a while, and for any help you might provide.> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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