Guest guest Posted April 17, 2006 Report Share Posted April 17, 2006 Trish, When my nada's done this kind of triangulation, it's been for at least two reasons: she's using the story to get at me and/or someone else, and it's her way of saying, " Look at me. I'D never do something as UNCOUTH as THAT! " I also, through long experience, know there's an ulterior and unhealthy motive for her to tell me things like this. I've responded like, " Hmm, that's interesting, " and " I see. " One Non-BP Recovering Man ************Just wanted to share what I use when nada or ANYONE violates a personal boundary. This can be nada doing her nada thing to a perfectionist, control, negative person that so sweetly lets me know that I am inferior (by their rules) in their world. I simply say, well, bless your heart, that is interesting etc. My code: bless your heart really means: Go get f***ed, or drop dead, or Who Cares (you get the idea). The only one that knows the real meaning of the phrase is me. The listener thinks I am agreeing/acknowledging with their warped negative opinion and I am able to relax and " throw off " the nastiness of the attacker because I am secretly laughing and shrugging off the attempt to control me. Take care, mg Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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