Intro

[Guest guest]

Hi my name is Kathy (chattiekathy)and I will be 42 in November. I live in

Pennsylvania with my hubby of 18 yrs, my son who is 16 ( who just

got his learner's permit) and my daughter who is going to be 12 also

in November.

I was dx with fibro in May of 2001 but dealt with I'm sure for many years

before until it hit my legs and I couldn't handle it anymore. I also have

been dx since that time with disc degenerative disease of the spine and

neck, herniated discs, muscle spasms, scolosis, and liaisons on the brain.

I walk with a cane since I lose my balance alot and have alot of pain and

discomfort along with burning in my legs distant walking is a nightmare - I

have a wheelchair and my hubby just got me a scooter and lift along with a

van to try to give me more freedom and be able to still go places with my

daughter .

- I am currently fighting for my SSD and have my first hearing this month-

I quit work almost a year at the end of this month - I had a pinched nerve

so bad in my neck that the pain was unbearable and since PA was going thru

a malpractice insurance crisis at the time no dr would treat me so I laid

in bed for 3 weeks pumped up with narcotics!!

I have alot of problems with fatigue and unable to get a full nights sleep -

I have started watching my carbs, sugar and caffeine and find that it

actually has helped some of the fatigue.

Today I will go see a new primary dr in hopes that he will take the bull by

the horn and actually try to have more answers for me- he treats alot of

patients with fibro - I have been to 4 rheum dr in my area but most of them

have been a joke as far as trying to treat me my current one has never even

examined me.

Sorry that this was so long but I look forward to sharing our fibro

stories, encouragement's and pain.

Hugs to all,

~*~* Kathy *~*~

chattiekathy@...

[Guest guest]

Hi Barbara,

Thank you so much for sharing your story and experiences.

Welcome to the ACT community

From my very limited understanding about your life I think ACT probably will

make a difference.

I think there are a few folks on this board who have, like you, tried all sorts

of different therapy forms with limited or no success.

I used to think I am particularly 'faulty' when many years of therapy didn't

make a difference. I was embarrassed to even admit to anyone that I've been

seeing therapists on and off for most of my life.

You'd think I'd be cured and happy by now!!

Anyway, ACT is a fantastic approach to all sorts of life's little and big

issues.

Anyway, enjoy the snow. We'll have 36 degrees (celsius, very hot) here on

Christmas Day

Keep us posted on how you're doing.

Birgit

>

> I've been lurking, and occasionally tossing in my 2 cents, for about a month

now. I'm not sure if newcomer intros are standard or not here.

>

> I've struggled with depression, negativity, low frustration tolerance, anger

and near constant worry since early childhood. Not a day goes by when I don't

wish I was dead – although I'm too responsible to kill myself. I've had serious

health problems, multiple operations, and still have serious health issues. I

just had an MRI that found several new issues. When my health nosedives, so does

my mood.

>

> I've tried various mental health " treatments " over the years. I don't

particularly fit into any boxes and have struggled with finding a therapeutic

fit – both in terms of philosophy and personality. In the 80s I had a therapist

insist I'd been sexually abused as a child because she couldn't imagine anyone

hating their father. Mine was just a nasty man, not a pedophile. I mentioned

earlier I had a shrink that wouldn't help me get off Paxil because he didn't

believe women could have sexual dysfunction. I dumped the CBT therapist who

insisted it was my " choice " to take responsibility for my mother's financial

affairs as her dementia hit. In the macro view – the abstract, yes everything we

do is a choice. But in the micro world – the real world- I could not and would

not abandon my mother to her dementia. I wanted help dealing with the stress and

self-doubt that came with my sense of responsibility, I didn't want to be told I

chose this stress and if I didn't want it I could wash my hands of my mom. I

took an anger management class, but my sarcastic, caustic, and cold behavior and

tone that pop up when I'm angry just didn't fit with a class designed for

physically violent people. I was the only voluntary, not court ordered,

participant. I enjoyed MBSR, but was unable to sustain a meditation practice

outside of the group format. I even tried DBT, but didn't fit with the rigid

format of the group/practice I went to.

>

> I learned about ACT a few years ago, but the only experienced practitioners in

the Twin Cities, MN are at the PSTD clinic at the VA. (military hospital for the

non-US folks) Dr. was just in town this summer and I finally tracked down

one therapist who has been to workshops, read all the books, but has never tried

ACT. We are going on this ACT journey together. Although he is an experienced

CBT practitioner, he agrees with me that tracing the root of my problems

(re-examining a crappy childhood); trying to stop my near constant judgmental,

sad and angry thoughts; or simply choosing to think and feel differently or

choosing not to think/feel/do things that feed my stress; is not effective.

>

> I'm 47, happily married – the one thing that seems to " work " in my life –

since 97. We have a 10 year old daughter and I want to be a better role model

for Kendra. I believe that the underlying principles of ACT are a better fit for

me that CBT or Freudian talk therapy. Trying to change my thoughts and feelings

just hasn't worked. But if I can learn to simply observe them and not act on

them and not label them as Truth; I can act according to my values and take care

of my mother without guilt or anger and be a better role model for Kendra and be

willing to lose some battles at work to win some wars.

>

> Things are looking up – we are headed for blizzard conditions Wednesday -

Saturday. Maybe I can have my dream X-mas – just Dave, Kendra and myself. My MIL

just told Dave we can stay home if the blizzard comes! 12 – 20 inches are

predicted.

>

> Thanks for listening

> Barbara

>

[Guest guest]

Barbara, thank you for your introduction and

for sharing your story thus far in your life. Many things you said resonate with me,

as I’m sure they do with many others here.

Welcome to the ACT journey. Maybe we can help each other along the

way now and then.

Helena

From: ACT_for_the_Public

[mailto:ACT_for_the_Public ] On

Behalf Of barbara_55109

Sent: Tuesday, December 22, 2009

6:03 PM

To:

ACT_for_the_Public

Subject:

Intro

I've been lurking, and occasionally tossing in my 2

cents, for about a month now. I'm not sure if newcomer intros are standard or

not here.

I've struggled with depression, negativity, low frustration tolerance, anger

and near constant worry since early childhood. Not a day goes by when I don't

wish I was dead – although I'm too responsible to kill myself. I've had

serious health problems, multiple operations, and still have serious health

issues. I just had an MRI that found several new issues. When my health

nosedives, so does my mood.

I've tried various mental health " treatments " over the years. I don't

particularly fit into any boxes and have struggled with finding a therapeutic

fit – both in terms of philosophy and personality. In the 80s I had a

therapist insist I'd been sexually abused as a child because she couldn't

imagine anyone hating their father. Mine was just a nasty man, not a pedophile.

I mentioned earlier I had a shrink that wouldn't help me get off Paxil because

he didn't believe women could have sexual dysfunction. I dumped the CBT

therapist who insisted it was my " choice " to take responsibility for

my mother's financial affairs as her dementia hit. In the macro view –

the abstract, yes everything we do is a choice. But in the micro world –

the real world- I could not and would not abandon my mother to her dementia. I

wanted help dealing with the stress and self-doubt that came with my sense of

responsibility, I didn't want to be told I chose this stress and if I didn't

want it I could wash my hands of my mom. I took an anger management class, but

my sarcastic, caustic, and cold behavior and tone that pop up when I'm angry

just didn't fit with a class designed for physically violent people. I was the

only voluntary, not court ordered, participant. I enjoyed MBSR, but was unable

to sustain a meditation practice outside of the group format. I even tried DBT,

but didn't fit with the rigid format of the group/practice I went to.

I learned about ACT a few years ago, but the only experienced practitioners in

the Twin Cities, MN are at the PSTD clinic at the VA. (military hospital for

the non-US folks) Dr. was just in town this summer and I finally tracked

down one therapist who has been to workshops, read all the books, but has never

tried ACT. We are going on this ACT journey together. Although he is an

experienced CBT practitioner, he agrees with me that tracing the root of my

problems (re-examining a crappy childhood); trying to stop my near constant

judgmental, sad and angry thoughts; or simply choosing to think and feel

differently or choosing not to think/feel/do things that feed my stress; is not

effective.

I'm 47, happily married – the one thing that seems to " work " in

my life – since 97. We have a 10 year old daughter and I want to be a

better role model for Kendra. I believe that the underlying principles of ACT

are a better fit for me that CBT or Freudian talk therapy. Trying to change my

thoughts and feelings just hasn't worked. But if I can learn to simply observe

them and not act on them and not label them as Truth; I can act according to my

values and take care of my mother without guilt or anger and be a better role

model for Kendra and be willing to lose some battles at work to win some wars.

Things are looking up – we are headed for blizzard conditions

Wednesday - Saturday. Maybe I can have my dream X-mas – just Dave, Kendra

and myself. My MIL just told Dave we can stay home if the blizzard comes! 12

– 20 inches are predicted.

Thanks for listening

Barbara