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OK, I need to vent

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I need to Vent about my mother and about a little bit of what I feel

is a little bit of ptsd.

Bill (my hubby) and I have suspected that my mother has been fired

from her job. A few clues that we were given by family members, her

car hasn't been at work during the hours that she normally worked

etc... Anyway,we took a drive past her apartment to see what was

going on. Sort of a let's make fun of my mom " joyride " kind of a

thing. I no longer speak to her, so I really don't care that she lost

her job. I'm really surprised that it took her as long as it did.

Well, we drove by the house, had a good laugh and that was the end of

it. At least I thought it was. We went to my sis in law's today. Her

6 y/o granddaughter was there. Tay, accidently spilled a bad of

chocolate chips on the floor and sue turned around and just said

disappointed " aww tay " she didn't yell or raise her voice, but I was

terrifed that she was gonna go off. now sue has NEVER raised her

voice to her children or grandchildren. NEVER! aww tay. that was it.

i was almost in tears waiting. so she said " grandma had the little

broom in the closet let me get it and i'll clean it up so that the

doggie doesn't eat it cause she can get sick. " and that was the end

of it. done. I didn't say anything. Sue knows what I went through,

and I think she saw that I was a bit shaken. Funny thing is she

thought she over reacted. then we were watching tv and tay was

hugging sue and sue had a glass of wine in her hand and taylor

accidently bumped her and a little of the wine spilled and sue

giggled and just picked up a napkin off of the table and wiped it off

her of sleeve (I guess cause it was white wine LOL) and that was then

end of it. but again, I was almost in tears, waiting for the bomb to

drop. I was terrifed for the child. Even though I know that going off

in that family is saying " aww " not screaming or yelling. I don't

think anyone has ever said I hate you. even when they were so upset

or hated somebody.

Sorry this post is so long, just had to vent. Thanks for listening.

Lauri

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