Re: Re: Advice from Dann/Doris

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

Sorry to hear about your flu. I think you need a good vacation.

Call me anytime re coffee. We might be able to get my sister to come. She is

eager to meet you too.

Take care and Merry Christmas. Doris

stimtimminss wrote:

Hi Doris!

Sorry to hear of your mom's recent decline. Her status remained so good in the

past year

since I've known you, small setbacks, but now this more noticeable confusion.

You have

her support system so well set up, thankfully. At this time I would likely try

to get the iron

from her and check the kitchen regularly for signs of microwave fire. My mom did

that,

with the microwave, one of the red flags to the need for supportive care for

her. At that

time we did not know about her dementia, figured the decline mentally was from

side

effects of the Parkinsons meds, and so it was as well.

Once we get through this hectic time of year let's plan another coffee outing!

> Dann

> Your concern regarding 24 hour companionship for my mom sent a wave of

> anxiety over me. After months of panic attacks over what is going to happen to

us I

> have finally settled into a " one day at a time " approach which has given me

> some peace. Maybe I am in denial. The thing about my mom is that aside from

this

> horrible LBD, which according to the DR she is in an early stage, she is in

> very good health for her 83 years. She lives on the top floor of her building

> and climbs 15 stairs with a spring in her step. She has no other health issues

> and takes no other meds. She gets dressed every day, prepares simple meals,

> pays her bills and her place is tidy. She walks to the post office, bank and

> corner market. As long as she does these things I feel that she can manage on

her

> own with some guidance and help from me. Our goal is to keep her independent

> for as long as possible. Certainly there have been changes and I do have to

> check in with her daily. Mostly it is her behavior, memory, and thought

> processes that are in decline and although that causes stress for her and our

family,

> she is harmless to herself and others.

>

> I keep reading the info on when to get help and when to change the living

> situation. So far she doesn't fit the profile for 24 hour care. And when she

> moves closer to me I can physically check on her every day. Those 15 stairs do

> worry me. The new place by me has an elevator.

>

> I dread the thought of placing her somewhere in assisted living or NH. I

> think that unless she is completely out of it she will not do well in that

kind of

> living. She is too suspicious and paranoid, always has been, to be living in

> such close proximity to other people.

>

> I am a little worried about just moving her to the new apt by me. Just

> because it will cause her a certain anxiety and will be " different " from what

she is

> used to. I just keep telling her and myself that the move is only a week of

> inconvenience and we must focus on how great it will be after she is settled

in

> cuz we will be neighbors!

>

> Maybe I am blowing it? Maybe I am out of touch with reality? Maybe someone

> else has a mom in the same stage as mine and can weigh in with their approach.

>

> thanks to everyone

> & Mom ginny 83 yrs.

>

>