Re: Decision/

[Guest guest]

Dear ,

This disease requires a lot of decision making by the caregivers or the one's

that have the DPOA. It is not easy. But to have everything in order takes that

much more stress off of you. My husband, Jim, made a Health Directive in his

better health years and stated what he wanted done at the end of life. I am

relieved that he made his own decisions and that I don't have to second guess if

it is what he would have wanted. My husband's directive is filed with his

doctor, so when the time comes the appropriate steps will be taken according to

my husband's wishes. I have learned my lessons from this disease and have also

made a Health Directive for me, so my kids will not have to ponder what to do,

as my wishes are stated for them to follow. I am sure glad this is one less

decision for me to make and stress out over. It will be hard enough at the end,

without the end of life decisons to make too.

You and your sisters have done well to get the decisons out of the way now,

since your mom can not make the decisions in her state of mind. I am glad that

your mother's doctor and friend supported you in your decisions.

You are in my thoughts and prayers as your mother takes this

journey......Hugs, Jan

/Ed wrote:

Dear Group

My sisters and I met yesterday to discuss " end of life " for our

Mother. I brought with me the e-mails and some of the links that you

all sent to me. We especially found comfort in " Hard Choices " .

We ran the gamut of emotions together. We talk about Mum as she used

to be, we talked about how her life has been recently. We laughed, we

cried and we have decided to let her go. I don't think any of us got

much rest last night as we struggled with the " second guesses " but

today we seem to have found some peace with our decision. It has been

helpful that her doctor told us that he feels we have made the right

decision and by chance one of Mum's oldest friends (her ex-boss and

now an Anglican Bishop) heard about it, dropped by to see Mum and say

some prayers today. She left us a the following note:

" My heart goes out to you and your sisters. I know how painful that

final vigil must be for you all. It is even harder to see your parent

so changed from the one you grew up with and love so deeply.

I commend you for the difficult decision not to get involved in heroic

measures. Not only would Maggie not have wanted it but there really

is no point in trying to restore her to the kind of confused half-life

she has been living lately. At this stage of her life there are worse

things than dying and I pray she will just slip away quietly. It

could take a long time; the human body is extraordinarily strong even

at the end. You have been and continue to be the kind of caring

daughters every mother should have. God bless, Ann "

I know there will be difficult days ahead. I want to thank all of you

for your thoughts and prayers.

Much love

from Cresswell ON Canada

Long distance CG to Margaret (Mum) aged 76

Moving to Palliative Care at Sunnybrook Hospital, Toronto, ON

End Stages LBD

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