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,

I read your comments about teething. Jack is now 15 1/2mths and has no teeth

yet and is showing absolutely NO signs of teething.I've heard that this is

quite common with CHARGErs so I'm not worrying yet. Jack still won't bring

toys etc to his mouth and is still defensive about letting me have a good look

in his mouth but his gums don't even look as they're ready to pop a tooth.

Elaine mum to Elise (6yrs) & Jack(15 1/2mth)CHaRGE

Dumfries,Scotland

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  • 1 month later...

Michele wrote:

I am reading the book When Bad Things Happen To Good People. Have any

of you read it? I have loved it! I plan to reread it to think it all

through again.

Another thing I'm struggling with is trying to understand why she can't

use her body the way the rest of us do. I just can't get it. I still

get angry wondering why she can't just do what she's supposed to. Why

is it so hard? Why are her muscles so weak? Why do her joints extend

so far? How is it all related to CHARGE? I keep thinking that all she

really has now is a vision impairment (only in one eye so not a huge

deal) and a feeding problem which she is overcoming. So where do the

physical limitations come from? It seems like more than the delay from

her hospitalizations and early illness. Can that be all it is and

she'll truly catch up? Or will she always be behind and different than

other kids her age? I just can't come to terms with it. How did you

guys accept and understand?

Hi Michele!

I read " When Bad Things Happen to Good People " 13 years ago when my

mother died-it helped then and when was born, I already knew

that bad things happen.

I think that there are many issues and that these differ to some

extent between kids. There are surgeries, hospitalizations,

illnesses, hearing impairment, vision impairment, cardiac issues,

sleep problems, and balance issues to name a few! I think that

balance factors into this alot. is being evaluated by the

vestibular lab at the Univ of Mich on Monday. We hope that the

therapies prescribed as a result of the evaluation will help him with

his ongoing balance problems.

I try not to compare with other children his own age-that is

NOT fair. If we are going to compare our CHARGE children, I think

that it is best to limit comparisons to with other CHARGE children

because at least they are on the same playing field! Even at a meeting the

other night for parents of hearing impaired children, it was hard because

has so many other issues. I found myself fighting back the

tears and praying that could have enough language and

understanding some day to use some of the assistive devices which

were demonstrated-the technology was amazing. Within the CHARGE

" family " each of our kids have different strengths and weaknesses, but a lot

more in common than with nonCHARGErs.

Congratulations on Aubrie's eating successes!

Cheryl, , (5), (3, CHaRGE)

Who agree that CHARGEland is a nice place that we never wanted to be.

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Cheryl-

Thanks for sharing your opinion. It helps so much to know how others

feel. I realize that I am not alone and I learn new ways of looking at

things.

I went to 's school program today. He is in 1st grade. Last

year, at his first school program, Aubrie was just a few weeks old and

still in the hospital I think. It was so hard to be there and I cried

thinking that she may never be up there singing with her peers. This

year it was still sad in some ways, but it felt good to know that she

*will* be there someday participating just as he did. And next year

she'll be old enough to enjoy watching her big brother.

Again, thanks for your response.

Michele

mom to Aubrie (1 yr) CHargE and (7 yrs)

IL

westml@...

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  • 1 month later...

At 06:27 AM 22/01/99 PST, you wrote:

>

>I already have on my PC a 2 page summary

>of my child. 1 page is a list of each problem, the specialist who

>follows her, last appt, next appt and how each dr is treating the

>problem. It's very organized. The 2nd page is each hospitalization in

>chronological order. The dates, the cause and the treatment given.

>Drs. always say " Thank you " they take it put it in her file then ask me

>all the questions for the complete medical history anyway. They write

>and write and when they're done they can't read their writing anyway.

>I've spoken with the patient advocate at the hospital (also a spec needs

>mom) and she has the same problem. She's trying to get through to the

>docs that this is ridiculous.

>

>Jeanne

Jeanne

WOW!! How organised is that? I am sooo jealous. I start off good but the

chaos seems to take over, and win in the end. I guess that's how I am

destined to remain. I can't even keep all of my bills in the right (and

one) place!!

Tiena

Mum to Mikaela (11), Cady (CHaRgE 9 tomorrow) and Paige (7)and Wife to

Arron (yes, he was home for dinner last night)

Brisbane, Australia

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  • 2 weeks later...

Jeanne,

I was just reading about the school you had hope to take Caitlyn, and I

was wondering about IE. Can't they guide you. KK's IE is the ones who

found what district we were in and what is the best options for KK.

She'll be starting on the 8th of next month. They don't require KK to be

potty trained, in fact there were two options for KK. A developmentally

delayed class, or a medical challenged class. The administrator though

the medical class would be better for her. I have some of the same

worries. Not sure if being with others will help or not help her, she

isn't potty trained, can't eat on her own, most of the time. She also

signs the easy simple words like more... and so on. They will keep that

up and try to teach more if needed. Anyways what I wanted to say is

can't the people at IE help you in this dept.? Just a suggestion.

Korey mom to KK

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Michele,

I agree with signing also. I always heard that signing was easier for

children to learn than talking. Especially if they can't hear very good.

We tryed and tryed to teach KK words. We got no where. As soon as we

were taught to sign, no kidding that next week her first word for signing

was.... " more " . But we kept at it all day and night. She picked up the

rest fairly easy. She still doesn't talk much, mostly signing. I can't

imagine not being able to talk with KK. It's worth a try, just keep at

it, it may look like your not getting anywhere, but you really are. Out

of the blue, KK just asked for " more " juice. I thought that I was

getting no where and that we might as well forget teaching her. But

really show the signing motion and try to show her what you mean. It

will work out and you'll be so happy.

Korey mom to KK

___________________________________________________________________

You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail.

Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com/getjuno.html

or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]

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First of all, Caitlyn's only hand anomaly is a single palar crease, the

docs like to call it a Simian (monkey) crease.

Secondly, --I have watched many babies who were not even conceived

at the time Caitlyn was born, heck, kids who were not even conceived

when Caitlyn was a year old, do many, many things that Caitlyn cannot do

and may not do for a long time. Let's see, kids who are 13 mos old were

conceived when Caitlyn was almost 2 years old and they are now running,

parallel playing, stacking blocks, manipulating fine motor toys, AND

they have much more hair than Caitlyn!!!

This is part of the pain we experience as a spec needs mom, I just had

to get used to biting my lip!

As a word of comfort to me, Caitlyn can do many things that kids her age

cannot do, Caitlyn can say her name, address, phone number, AND her

Pledge of Allegiance. She can memorize anything in a day or 2. Yay

Caitlyn!

As Jillian gets older, you will see her strengths and personality, and

you will be able to focus on them. Although it always remains hard to

see other kids.

Jeanne

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