Guest guest Posted August 4, 2002 Report Share Posted August 4, 2002 I am new to the group. I was diagnosed with Lupus in June. I already had hashimoto's thyroid disease. My Lungs are really hurting today. I read that this common with lupus. Any info will be appreciated. I am taking plaquenil, unithroid and lotensin for high blood pressure. I am also menopausal at 46 and I am sad that I will probably never be able to have a child. I am feeling sadness and anger right now. Please pray for me that I will remain spiritually strong. I think that the fact that I smoked for 20 yrs. had something to do with developing thyroid and lupus. I am feeling terrible because I smoked for so many years and I am having a hard time FORGIVING MYSELF. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2002 Report Share Posted August 5, 2002 Hey, Welcome to the group, and don't feel bad for smoking for so long. I did it too. I have a low thyroid, and lupus. It took me 12 years to get pregnant, with my daughter, and that was with no protection. I figured if God ment for it to happen it would. I thought that I was never going to have a child. I had her at 30. She is probably the only one that I am going to have, since between my fiancee and I we have 3 kids. He had 2 from his previous marriage. Whatever is meant to be will be okay. Don't feel bad about it though. It is not like you planned it or anything. Okay? Love, a Nelly Ramos wrote: I am new to the group. I was diagnosed with Lupus in June. I already had hashimoto's thyroid disease. My Lungs are really hurting today. I read that this common with lupus. Any info will be appreciated. I am taking plaquenil, unithroid and lotensin for high blood pressure. I am also menopausal at 46 and I am sad that I will probably never be able to have a child. I am feeling sadness and anger right now. Please pray for me that I will remain spiritually strong. I think that the fact that I smoked for 20 yrs. had something to do with developing thyroid and lupus. I am feeling terrible because I smoked for so many years and I am having a hard time FORGIVING MYSELF."The LUPIES Store" Come check out our store...http://www.cafepress.com/thelupies"The LUPIES Web Page"http://www.itzarion.com/lupusgroup.html"The LUPIES online photo albums!" Check out what your fellow Lupies look like...http://www.picturetrail.com/gallery/view?username=lupies Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2002 Report Share Posted August 5, 2002 Nells, Are you still smoking? Sounds like you quit a while ago, so quit the self-blame routine, ok? I smoked for over twenty years, and had a three pack a day habit, to boot. But, I don't have lung problems from smoking. I quit almost 20 years ago, and my lungs don't show any signs of being a smoker at all. What I DO have is asthma from living in the allergy capitol of the world. So, I can hardly be held accountable for the wildflowers and grasses in this area, can I? Are you using inhalers? Has your doctor made any tests of your lung capacity, and done any indepth xrays or any of that? Don't let life happen to you, make it happen! Insist on docs doing what's needed to make sure everything that can be done IS being done. Take charge of your life and medical case, so that you KNOW everything that is happening for and to you. It's hard to do, we know better than most, but it is necessary for you to attain any quality of life, and to keep as positive an attitude as possible. Keep writing, know that we are here for each other, and that prayers are almost a given with this group. Hugs, MM aka: Mike one of the moderators Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2002 Report Share Posted August 5, 2002 Laurie, I, too, was unable to have children the normal way, but I have four children anyway. I went out and got O.P.'s...other people's. I adopted four, three boys and a girl...as a single working parent. So, it IS possible to be a mother and have Lupus, Lyme Disease, Rheumatoid Arthritis, Sjogren's, Fibromyalgia and Diabetes, and still be a mom. Just have to be extra stubborn, like me. LOL Sure, I would have liked to have my own birth children, but, I'm not complaining. I have had some harrowing times with my kids, but that could be true of birth parents, too. I have also had some extremely rewarding experiences with my kids, and they far outweigh the bad times, by a long shot. My two youngest boys were not expected to live, as they were three months early (both of them, although they are not birth siblings and are four years apart), weighed in at less than two pounds, and one had a stroke at birth, and was cocaine exposed; and the other was crack and alcohol exposed and severely infected in his respiratory tract. It took us four years to completely clear up the infections. But, and this is the biggest " but " of all, these boys are attending regular classes, and Day classes in regular schools, the elder is artistically gifted, and the younger athletically gifted and interested in math and music. So, you see, hope lives, in spite of us all. Hope your days are painfree and happier for you. Hugs, MM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2002 Report Share Posted August 5, 2002 Laurie, I, too, am part of the OP motherhood. I had one biological child, we had adopted one child and that same day I found out I was pregnant with twins, although one of the twins did die early in the pregnancy. When I look at my three daughters, it is hard for me to remember that I did not have 3 pregnancies. Remember, AN ADOPTED CHILD DOESN'T GROW IN YOUR UTERUS, IT GROWS IN YOUR HEART. No truer words were EVER spoken! We waited 6 years to get our daughter. We were particular about sex, hair color or anything. Just wanted another child. She came home with us when she was 3 weeks old. I never had another doubt about adopting in my life. It is very common in a marriage for one of the partners to have reservations about adoption. In my case, it was me. I felt I could never love another woman's child. Well, the first time someone asked the girls who was 's Mom, I snapped at them I was, just like the other girls. Yep she is mine all lock, stock and barrel. She has my name, my religion, my beliefs and my future. An adopted or biological child gives as much love to you as you give to them. Any child is a true gift from God. Gentle, tender, angel hugs, Debs in FL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2002 Report Share Posted August 5, 2002 Hi Nelly! Welcome to the group! I know pretty much exactly how you feel. (Not having children and the whole smoking/ lung issue.) I get really sad at times about not having children and I really think you have to mourn what will never be. You have to come to terms with it before you can move on, but it will never be okay. There are times when I wish more than anything I could be a mother and then there are times (when I really hurt and feel bad) that I am so thankful I don't. I just try to make the best of what I have and try not to concentrate on what I don't have. I have smoked since I was 13 years old. I quit in 1993 and in 1997 I had open heart surgery to repair 2 atrial septal defects. In 1999, I started smoking again because I went out drinking and the rest is history. I tried quitting off and on up until August of last year. I ended up in the ER because I couldn't breathe. My asthma got extremely worse along with chronic bronchitis. The doctors told me that if I didn't quit, I would die. So, I quit. Let me tell you, it is not easy! I still crave those damn things all day every day, but I do want to live and being able to breathe is a plus. I am on QVAR (an inhaled steroid) and Albuterol rescue inhaler. I also got pleurisy every time I turned around for 4 years and I am on Plaquenil which has helped that. It's a real bummer to say the least that so much goes wrong with our bodies and we don't ask for any of it. Life is definitely not fair. Last year this time, I was a tan size 6 and in one year I have gained 60 pounds! Ughhhhhh! I don't recognize myself anymore and I don't even know what is going on with my body, but I think it is totally giving out! We just have to do the best we can and try to stay as positive as possible, but it is hard! There are times when I get really down and depressed, but hope tomorrow is better. Just let me know if you want to talk! Please don't blame yourself for any of this craziness. Okay? Laurie Nelly Ramos wrote: I am new to the group. I was diagnosed with Lupus in June. I already had hashimoto's thyroid disease. My Lungs are really hurting today. I read that this common with lupus. Any info will be appreciated. I am taking plaquenil, unithroid and lotensin for high blood pressure. I am also menopausal at 46 and I am sad that I will probably never be able to have a child. I am feeling sadness and anger right now. Please pray for me that I will remain spiritually strong. I think that the fact that I smoked for 20 yrs. had something to do with developing thyroid and lupus. I am feeling terrible because I smoked for so many years and I am having a hard time FORGIVING MYSELF."The LUPIES Store" Come check out our store...http://www.cafepress.com/thelupies"The LUPIES Web Page"http://www.itzarion.com/lupusgroup.html"The LUPIES online photo albums!" Check out what your fellow Lupies look like...http://www.picturetrail.com/gallery/view?username=lupies Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 6, 2002 Report Share Posted August 6, 2002 Debs, You got that right! You go, girl! I don't care how many crises my children bring me, at least I am here for them. That was my purpose in starting this whole business and I've never wavered from it. I always have to laugh when someone asks me if my kids are " mine " . They always hesitate before asking, because my kids are all a much different shade of brown from me. But, I always say, Yup, they're mine alright. My boys have always told people I am their mama, and they don't take any arguments. My eldest, the one I am having such a time over right now, when he was six, nicknamed me " The Mean Green Mother Machine " , because I wouldn't let him have candy before dinner once in a restaurant. He thought that if he offered to cause a scene in public, I would give in. Boy, was he wrong. I'll never forget the look on his face when I picked him up by the back of his overalls, and carried him out to the car with a doggie bag in my other hand! LOL I had dinner at home, and he had his in his room. He never tried that again while I had him with me, but he did do other things which put him in a highly dangerous state, so he had to be hospitalized early on. A mother's heart never stops, even when a child has become a stranger to them. In our hearts they are always our children, no matter what they do. God had a plan, and we can't help it. LOL Love, MM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 6, 2002 Report Share Posted August 6, 2002 Hi Sweetie, Prayers still going up for you and ! Hang in there Mom. NO ONE should mess with a Mama Bear when it comes to her cubs! Gentle, tender, loving angel hugs to you and yours, Debs in FL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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