Guest guest Posted November 5, 2006 Report Share Posted November 5, 2006 June I am so sorry for your loss. My condolences to you and your family. You did the right thing. He is now in a better place and out of pain and confusion. I will keep you in my prayers. Jacqui from Florida Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 5, 2006 Report Share Posted November 5, 2006 Dear June I am sorry for the loss of your husband. It truly must have been the hardest thing to go through, but I believe you did the best for him as you have always tried to do. I have been away from the board for awhile and have been trying to read through many messages all at once and could see your struggle over the past little while. Be kind to yourself and know that it was out of love that you made the right choice. Take care and know that all of us are thinking of you. Kath in Toronto June Christensen wrote: Someone said that the hardest thing they had to do was to put their LO in a nursing home. No, the hardest thing you have to do is make a decision to sign a DNR and allow your LO to die. Darrell died last night just before 10 o'clock after four days of food and water restriction. About halfway through, I thought that I had made the wrong decision, as I didn't think it would take so long and be so hard to watch. The next morning, our minister came in, and I told him that. He said " No, you didn't. " We had two hospital stays in the month of October, both times 5-6 hours in the ER being poked, probed, IV'd with antibiotices, rehydrated, x-rayed, CT scanned, and finally returned to the NH. The last time the doctor said he couldn't do anything more to help him. There was little more than a week between the two times before he had to return. I could not put him through it again, and if it would have made him well, I would have done it in a heartbeat. So, I will always have to wonder if I did the right thing, but I know he is out of that miserable existence of dementia. When he took his last breaths, it was quick and appeared to be painless. He had been treated with Tylenol suppositories and morphine for fever and pain; they kept his mouth moistened as much as possible. Our last daughter came at 3:30 yesterday, and I truly think he was waiting on her. All the children, grandchildren, and great granchildren that were close enough came at least once. I did authorize the autopsy to include the body as well as the brain tissue that is being sent to the Univ. of Indiana. I just had to know what was wrong with him physically or if it was just part of the disease. We should be able to get preliminary results soon, but the toxicology report will take over a week. Of course, the brain tissue research will be several months. I hope none of you have to make this decision. I fought it right to the end. His funeral will be Wednesday, and our daughter is making a computerized picture presentation with thoughts from the kids/grandkids/great grandkids included. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers. __________________________________________________________ Cheap Talk? Check out Yahoo! Messenger's low PC-to-Phone call rates (http://voice.yahoo.com) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 5, 2006 Report Share Posted November 5, 2006 Dear June, Please know that you and your family will be in my prayers. I am so sorry for your loss. I followed along and I know how very hard you worked to always do the best for Darrell. You did everything you could, sometimes we just can't do the impossible. I will pray that you find the strength to make it through the weeks to follow knowing you did everything you could. My best, Carol Incognito Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 5, 2006 Report Share Posted November 5, 2006 Dear June, I am so sorry to hear about Darrell. My heart goes out to you. You have been through so much. You are in my thoughts and prayers during this difficult time. I rejoice that Darrell is now free of the dreaded LBD and at peace at last. He has suffered so much within the last few months. I am in shock, because it seemed not long ago that Jim and Darrell were somewhat in the same phase of this disease as we compared. It is frightening how fast our Loved Ones can be taken from us and how fast they can spiral downward. June, you have been one of my special angels here and I always looked forward to hear how you were doing. I pray you can find some comfort. My condolences to your family......Hugs, Jan June Christensen wrote: Someone said that the hardest thing they had to do was to put their LO in a nursing home. No, the hardest thing you have to do is make a decision to sign a DNR and allow your LO to die. Darrell died last night just before 10 o'clock after four days of food and water restriction. About halfway through, I thought that I had made the wrong decision, as I didn't think it would take so long and be so hard to watch. The next morning, our minister came in, and I told him that. He said " No, you didn't. " We had two hospital stays in the month of October, both times 5-6 hours in the ER being poked, probed, IV'd with antibiotices, rehydrated, x-rayed, CT scanned, and finally returned to the NH. The last time the doctor said he couldn't do anything more to help him. There was little more than a week between the two times before he had to return. I could not put him through it again, and if it would have made him well, I would have done it in a heartbeat. So, I will always have to wonder if I did the right thing, but I know he is out of that miserable existence of dementia. When he took his last breaths, it was quick and appeared to be painless. He had been treated with Tylenol suppositories and morphine for fever and pain; they kept his mouth moistened as much as possible. Our last daughter came at 3:30 yesterday, and I truly think he was waiting on her. All the children, grandchildren, and great granchildren that were close enough came at least once. I did authorize the autopsy to include the body as well as the brain tissue that is being sent to the Univ. of Indiana. I just had to know what was wrong with him physically or if it was just part of the disease. We should be able to get preliminary results soon, but the toxicology report will take over a week. Of course, the brain tissue research will be several months. I hope none of you have to make this decision. I fought it right to the end. His funeral will be Wednesday, and our daughter is making a computerized picture presentation with thoughts from the kids/grandkids/great grandkids included. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers. ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Cheap Talk? Check out Yahoo! Messenger's low PC-to-Phone call rates (http://voice.yahoo.com) Welcome to LBDcaregivers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 5, 2006 Report Share Posted November 5, 2006 June, My heart goes out to you. It is such a difficult decision especially when we spend so many years trying to keep them well and alive. Then in the turn of a moment, you have to do all the things that you have been so deligent about for so long. Condolences to you and your family.. Sending hugs and lots of good thoughts for now until Wed. It is good that he is outside the dementia and without pain. Donna R Caregave for Mom (after I brought her from WI to MI) for 3 years and 4th year in a nh. She was almost 89 when she died in '02. No dx other than mine. Darrell Someone said that the hardest thing they had to do was to put their LO in a nursing home. No, the hardest thing you have to do is make a decision to sign a DNR and allow your LO to die. Darrell died last night just before 10 o'clock after four days of food and water restriction. About halfway through, I thought that I had made the wrong decision, as I didn't think it would take so long and be so hard to watch. The next morning, our minister came in, and I told him that. He said " No, you didn't. " We had two hospital stays in the month of October, both times 5-6 hours in the ER being poked, probed, IV'd with antibiotices, rehydrated, x-rayed, CT scanned, and finally returned to the NH. The last time the doctor said he couldn't do anything more to help him. There was little more than a week between the two times before he had to return. I could not put him through it again, and if it would have made him well, I would have done it in a heartbeat. So, I will always have to wonder if I did the right thing, but I know he is out of that miserable existence of dementia. When he took his last breaths, it was quick and appeared to be painless. He had been treated with Tylenol suppositories and morphine for fever and pain; they kept his mouth moistened as much as possible. Our last daughter came at 3:30 yesterday, and I truly think he was waiting on her. All the children, grandchildren, and great granchildren that were close enough came at least once. I did authorize the autopsy to include the body as well as the brain tissue that is being sent to the Univ. of Indiana. I just had to know what was wrong with him physically or if it was just part of the disease. We should be able to get preliminary results soon, but the toxicology report will take over a week. Of course, the brain tissue research will be several months. I hope none of you have to make this decision. I fought it right to the end. His funeral will be Wednesday, and our daughter is making a computerized picture presentation with thoughts from the kids/grandkids/great grandkids included. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers. ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Cheap Talk? Check out Yahoo! Messenger's low PC-to-Phone call rates (http://voice.yahoo.com) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 Dearest June... Please accept my heartfelt condolences during this difficult time. You are absolutely correct, being put on the spot and being asked should or shouldn't you perform heroics for your LO is the most difficult thing to do, even more difficult than deciding that your LO be moved into a NH... I, too, questioned if we had made the right decision by saying 'no' to a breathing tube for my mom on her last day. But now know that we did make the right decision. And you did too. And know that your decision was made out of LOVE for Darrell and that is the best way to make such a decision. Please take the time during the next few days to stop and breath. Be good to yourself over anything else. You did so much for so long for your beloved Darrell and it'll be difficult at first to figure out what to do with yourself. Do what you have to do in order to grieve. For me it's keeping busy (with my charity auction) but at the same time in the back of my head -- I know that I can't just cover up the grief, that I must let it run its course in order to recover best. Know that we're here for you whenever you need to vent. A big bear hug for ((((((((((((((you)))))))))))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 June, I am so very sorry to hear Darrell has passed away. Its been a very rough month or so for you both. I know it was a terrible time for you to have to make the final decision but remind yourself he is free of disease, pain and most of that horrible dementia that took him away in the first place. You are were a wonderful wife and caregiver and he was very blessed to have you look after him. My sympathies are with you and your family at this time. Gentle Hugs Vallerie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 Dear June, My condolences to you and your family. You fought very well for Darrell. May you find peace in the days ahead. , borough, ON cg to MIL > > Someone said that the hardest thing they had to do was > to put their LO in a nursing home. No, the hardest > thing you have to do is make a decision to sign a DNR > and allow your LO to die. > > Darrell died last night just before 10 o'clock after > four days of food and water restriction. About > halfway through, I thought that I had made the wrong > decision, as I didn't think it would take so long and > be so hard to watch. The next morning, our minister > came in, and I told him that. He said " No, you > didn't. " We had two hospital stays in the month of > October, both times 5-6 hours in the ER being poked, > probed, IV'd with antibiotices, rehydrated, x-rayed, > CT scanned, and finally returned to the NH. The last > time the doctor said he couldn't do anything more to > help him. There was little more than a week between > the two times before he had to return. I could not > put him through it again, and if it would have made > him well, I would have done it in a heartbeat. So, I > will always have to wonder if I did the right thing, > but I know he is out of that miserable existence of > dementia. When he took his last breaths, it was quick > and appeared to be painless. He had been treated with > Tylenol suppositories and morphine for fever and pain; > they kept his mouth moistened as much as possible. > Our last daughter came at 3:30 yesterday, and I truly > think he was waiting on her. All the children, > grandchildren, and great granchildren that were close > enough came at least once. > > I did authorize the autopsy to include the body as > well as the brain tissue that is being sent to the > Univ. of Indiana. I just had to know what was wrong > with him physically or if it was just part of the > disease. We should be able to get preliminary results > soon, but the toxicology report will take over a week. > Of course, the brain tissue research will be several > months. > > I hope none of you have to make this decision. I > fought it right to the end. His funeral will be > Wednesday, and our daughter is making a computerized > picture presentation with thoughts from the > kids/grandkids/great grandkids included. Please keep > us in your thoughts and prayers. > > > > > > ______________________________________________________________________ ______________ > Cheap Talk? Check out Yahoo! Messenger's low PC-to-Phone call rates > (http://voice.yahoo.com) > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 Dear June, I am so sorry to hear of Darrell's passing. I know how hard it was to watch the end of his journey. My heart goes out to you. My father passed away in the same manner eight months ago. He was unable to eat or drink for the last weeks of his life, and I decided, like you, not to go with the feeding tube. It was harder to watch than I had expected, and I have second guessed myself a million times. As I think back over the months, I know I did the right thing. I think you will feel that way, too, in time. My dad was absolutely miserable, and had no quality of life, and he would not have wanted to live that way. It is still a very difficult thing to process in my mind though. In time, you will find peace with your decision. Darrell is in a much better place, and is no longer suffering. It is a very courageous decision you made, and shows your true love and devotion for your husband. I will be keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers during this difficult time. Much love, Piper Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 Dear June, I am sorry to hear of your loss of your husband. We are never ready, no matter how long we watch our loved ones decline. Please hold your head high, knowing that you did everything that you could to take care of him when he could no longer do it himself. I'm sure he could feel your love for him. May he rest in peace and may you find peace. Thank you for sharing your journey and thoughts with us. I'm glad you have your family and us for your support. We are here. Take care, Daughter of Bill, 91 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 June, I understand how hard this was for you. Anytime you have to make a hard decision like that, remember the results won't be perfect either way. You did what you thought was best. God us so gracious and understanding. Cast all your cares upon him -- he's got bigger shoulders than you do. Then crawl up in his lap and snuggle down and get some rest. I hope the time with friends and family can be special for you, in spite of the pain. G Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 Please accept my sympathies I am sorry you had to deal with such a decision, but I would have done the same as you , sending prayers to you and your family and love ...... Eileen Ontario Canada -- Darrell Someone said that the hardest thing they had to do was to put their LO in a nursing home. No, the hardest thing you have to do is make a decision to sign a DNR and allow your LO to die. Darrell died last night just before 10 o'clock after four days of food and water restriction. About halfway through, I thought that I had made the wrong decision, as I didn't think it would take so long and be so hard to watch. The next morning, our minister came in, and I told him that. He said " No, you didn't. " We had two hospital stays in the month of October, both times 5-6 hours in the ER being poked, probed, IV'd with antibiotices, rehydrated, x-rayed, CT scanned, and finally returned to the NH. The last time the doctor said he couldn't do anything more to help him. There was little more than a week between the two times before he had to return. I could not put him through it again, and if it would have made him well, I would have done it in a heartbeat. So, I will always have to wonder if I did the right thing, but I know he is out of that miserable existence of dementia. When he took his last breaths, it was quick and appeared to be painless. He had been treated with Tylenol suppositories and morphine for fever and pain; they kept his mouth moistened as much as possible. Our last daughter came at 3:30 yesterday, and I truly think he was waiting on her. All the children, grandchildren, and great granchildren that were close enough came at least once. I did authorize the autopsy to include the body as well as the brain tissue that is being sent to the Univ. of Indiana. I just had to know what was wrong with him physically or if it was just part of the disease. We should be able to get preliminary results soon, but the toxicology report will take over a week. Of course, the brain tissue research will be several months. I hope none of you have to make this decision. I fought it right to the end. His funeral will be Wednesday, and our daughter is making a computerized picture presentation with thoughts from the kids/grandkids/great grandkids included. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers. __________________________________________________________ Cheap Talk? Check out Yahoo! Messenger's low PC-to-Phone call rates (http://voice.yahoo.com) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 Hi June, My heart goes out to you. As if losing a LO isn't hard enough we are then bombarded with doubts and feelings of guilt. For what its worth, I think you did exactly the right thing. You showed her husband mercy when this awful disease would not. I hope that I never have to be put in this position but I can tell you that I would do exactly as you did. Sending you and yours strength. Courage Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 June, My deepest sympathy and prayers are with you. June Christensen wrote: Someone said that the hardest thing they had to do was to put their LO in a nursing home. No, the hardest thing you have to do is make a decision to sign a DNR and allow your LO to die. Darrell died last night just before 10 o'clock after four days of food and water restriction. About halfway through, I thought that I had made the wrong decision, as I didn't think it would take so long and be so hard to watch. The next morning, our minister came in, and I told him that. He said " No, you didn't. " We had two hospital stays in the month of October, both times 5-6 hours in the ER being poked, probed, IV'd with antibiotices, rehydrated, x-rayed, CT scanned, and finally returned to the NH. The last time the doctor said he couldn't do anything more to help him. There was little more than a week between the two times before he had to return. I could not put him through it again, and if it would have made him well, I would have done it in a heartbeat. So, I will always have to wonder if I did the right thing, but I know he is out of that miserable existence of dementia. When he took his last breaths, it was quick and appeared to be painless. He had been treated with Tylenol suppositories and morphine for fever and pain; they kept his mouth moistened as much as possible. Our last daughter came at 3:30 yesterday, and I truly think he was waiting on her. All the children, grandchildren, and great granchildren that were close enough came at least once. I did authorize the autopsy to include the body as well as the brain tissue that is being sent to the Univ. of Indiana. I just had to know what was wrong with him physically or if it was just part of the disease. We should be able to get preliminary results soon, but the toxicology report will take over a week. Of course, the brain tissue research will be several months. I hope none of you have to make this decision. I fought it right to the end. His funeral will be Wednesday, and our daughter is making a computerized picture presentation with thoughts from the kids/grandkids/great grandkids included. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers. __________________________________________________________ Cheap Talk? Check out Yahoo! Messenger's low PC-to-Phone call rates (http://voice.yahoo.com) --------------------------------- Cheap Talk? Check out Yahoo! Messenger's low PC-to-Phone call rates. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 June: Whatever the decision you made was right for you and Darrell. Think no more upon it. Think now upon the good days and memories. Grieve well. You are in my thoughts today. Myrna (68) in Missouri Caregiver for Husband Jerry (71) Diagnosed AD 1997, LBD 2004 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 Dear, dear June My heart is so heavy. I will keep you all in my thoughts and prayers. I am so happy that you have family close by. It has been a very long and rough road, but his pain is over and I am sure he is rejoicing. Please don't try to second guess yourself. You must remember the LBD motto that we have all used from time to time. " You are only responsible for the effort and not the outcome " You did the best that anyone could have ever done. You did make the right decisions. I am sure your husband is happy with the outcome too. You are a hero to us all. Dena Mother (84) End stages of LBD --- June Christensen wrote: > Someone said that the hardest thing they had to do > was > to put their LO in a nursing home. No, the hardest > thing you have to do is make a decision to sign a > DNR > and allow your LO to die. > > Darrell died last night just before 10 o'clock after > four days of food and water restriction. About > halfway through, I thought that I had made the wrong > decision, as I didn't think it would take so long > and > be so hard to watch. The next morning, our minister > came in, and I told him that. He said " No, you > didn't. " We had two hospital stays in the month of > October, both times 5-6 hours in the ER being poked, > probed, IV'd with antibiotices, rehydrated, x-rayed, > CT scanned, and finally returned to the NH. The > last > time the doctor said he couldn't do anything more to > help him. There was little more than a week between > the two times before he had to return. I could not > put him through it again, and if it would have made > him well, I would have done it in a heartbeat. So, > I > will always have to wonder if I did the right thing, > but I know he is out of that miserable existence of > dementia. When he took his last breaths, it was > quick > and appeared to be painless. He had been treated > with > Tylenol suppositories and morphine for fever and > pain; > they kept his mouth moistened as much as possible. > Our last daughter came at 3:30 yesterday, and I > truly > think he was waiting on her. All the children, > grandchildren, and great granchildren that were > close > enough came at least once. > > I did authorize the autopsy to include the body as > well as the brain tissue that is being sent to the > Univ. of Indiana. I just had to know what was wrong > with him physically or if it was just part of the > disease. We should be able to get preliminary > results > soon, but the toxicology report will take over a > week. > Of course, the brain tissue research will be > several > months. > > I hope none of you have to make this decision. I > fought it right to the end. His funeral will be > Wednesday, and our daughter is making a computerized > picture presentation with thoughts from the > kids/grandkids/great grandkids included. Please > keep > us in your thoughts and prayers. > > > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ > Cheap Talk? Check out Yahoo! Messenger's low > PC-to-Phone call rates > (http://voice.yahoo.com) > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Sponsored Link Degrees online in as fast as 1 Yr - MBA, Bachelor's, Master's, Associate Click now to apply http://yahoo.degrees.info Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 June, I am so very sorry. Please don't isolate yourself, but stay with us. Being around others that care, will help you on this last leg of a very long and painful journey. I send you love and a warm embrace. Imogene In a message dated 11/5/2006 10:48:19 PM Central Standard Time, jchristensen1953@... writes: Someone said that the hardest thing they had to do was to put their LO in a nursing home. No, the hardest thing you have to do is make a decision to sign a DNR and allow your LO to die. Darrell died last night just before 10 o'clock after four days of food and water restriction. About halfway through, I thought that I had made the wrong decision, as I didn't think it would take so long and be so hard to watch. The next morning, our minister came in, and I told him that. He said " No, you didn't. " We had two hospital stays in the month of October, both times 5-6 hours in the ER being poked, probed, IV'd with antibiotices, rehydrated, x-rayed, CT scanned, and finally returned to the NH. The last time the doctor said he couldn't do anything more to help him. There was little more than a week between the two times before he had to return. I could not put him through it again, and if it would have made him well, I would have done it in a heartbeat. So, I will always have to wonder if I did the right thing, but I know he is out of that miserable existence of dementia. When he took his last breaths, it was quick and appeared to be painless. He had been treated with Tylenol suppositories and morphine for fever and pain; they kept his mouth moistened as much as possible. Our last daughter came at 3:30 yesterday, and I truly think he was waiting on her. All the children, grandchildren, and great granchildren that were close enough came at least once. I did authorize the autopsy to include the body as well as the brain tissue that is being sent to the Univ. of Indiana. I just had to know what was wrong with him physically or if it was just part of the disease. We should be able to get preliminary results soon, but the toxicology report will take over a week. Of course, the brain tissue research will be several months. I hope none of you have to make this decision. I fought it right to the end. His funeral will be Wednesday, and our daughter is making a computerized picture presentation with thoughts from the kids/grandkids/kids/grandkids/<WBR>great grandkids i us in your thoughts and prayers. __________________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 june, i am so sorry you had to make taht decision, i too had to make that decision and it is not easy. i am sure that darrell knew and felt your love for him, and as much as he hated leaving you and his family behind, he is nowpainfree and walking among the angels, and watching over the ones he loves. he is gone only in body, his spirit and love still lives on inside you and the family. you made the right decision, he had no quality of life, now he is dancing and celebrating his freedom. he is at peace, you should be too. the decision you made shows how deep your love is. it is harder to let go of those we love, than it is to prolong their suffering just because we arent ready to lose them, take care of yourself. please it is very important, hugs, sharon and donnie m ---- June Christensen wrote: Someone said that the hardest thing they had to do was to put their LO in a nursing home. No, the hardest thing you have to do is make a decision to sign a DNR and allow your LO to die. Darrell died last night just before 10 o'clock after four days of food and water restriction. About halfway through, I thought that I had made the wrong decision, as I didn't think it would take so long and be so hard to watch. The next morning, our minister came in, and I told him that. He said " No, you didn't. " We had two hospital stays in the month of October, both times 5-6 hours in the ER being poked, probed, IV'd with antibiotices, rehydrated, x-rayed, CT scanned, and finally returned to the NH. The last time the doctor said he couldn't do anything more to help him. There was little more than a week between the two times before he had to return. I could not put him through it again, and if it would have made him well, I would have done it in a heartbeat. So, I will always have to wonder if I did the right thing, but I know he is out of that miserable existence of dementia. When he took his last breaths, it was quick and appeared to be painless. He had been treated with Tylenol suppositories and morphine for fever and pain; they kept his mouth moistened as much as possible. Our last daughter came at 3:30 yesterday, and I truly think he was waiting on her. All the children, grandchildren, and great granchildren that were close enough came at least once. I did authorize the autopsy to include the body as well as the brain tissue that is being sent to the Univ. of Indiana. I just had to know what was wrong with him physically or if it was just part of the disease. We should be able to get preliminary results soon, but the toxicology report will take over a week. Of course, the brain tissue research will be several months. I hope none of you have to make this decision. I fought it right to the end. His funeral will be Wednesday, and our daughter is making a computerized picture presentation with thoughts from the kids/grandkids/great grandkids included. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers. ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Cheap Talk? Check out Yahoo! Messenger's low PC-to-Phone call rates (http://voice.yahoo.com) -- Daugher of Leonard, diag May 2004, had lbd since 1993, had hip surgery from fall 7/05, aspiration pneumonia 7/05 with pulmonary embolyis, had aspiration pneumonia and uti 8/05, died of blood pressure drop on 9/25/05, may he rest in peace with his mom and dad, a smile a day keeps the meanies away Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 Dear June, My deepest condolences to you and your family for your husband's passing. You made the right choice and set him free. I send you Peace and Love to set yourself free of the pain you are feeling. Feel his love for you for allowing him to go. Many more hugs and prayers to you and your family, Stevie ***Caregiver for Mr. B since dx with Parkinson's in 1993, dx with LBD in 2003, passed away July 6, 2006 in my home.*** * * * * * June Christensen wrote: > > Someone said that the hardest thing they had to do was > to put their LO in a nursing home. No, the hardest > thing you have to do is make a decision to sign a DNR > and allow your LO to die. > > Darrell died last night just before 10 o'clock after > four days of food and water restriction. About > halfway through, I thought that I had made the wrong > decision, as I didn't think it would take so long and > be so hard to watch. The next morning, our minister > came in, and I told him that. He said " No, you > didn't. " We had two hospital stays in the month of > October, both times 5-6 hours in the ER being poked, > probed, IV'd with antibiotices, rehydrated, x-rayed, > CT scanned, and finally returned to the NH. The last > time the doctor said he couldn't do anything more to > help him. There was little more than a week between > the two times before he had to return. I could not > put him through it again, and if it would have made > him well, I would have done it in a heartbeat. So, I > will always have to wonder if I did the right thing, > but I know he is out of that miserable existence of > dementia. When he took his last breaths, it was quick > and appeared to be painless. He had been treated with > Tylenol suppositories and morphine for fever and pain; > they kept his mouth moistened as much as possible. > Our last daughter came at 3:30 yesterday, and I truly > think he was waiting on her. All the children, > grandchildren, and great granchildren that were close > enough came at least once. > > I did authorize the autopsy to include the body as > well as the brain tissue that is being sent to the > Univ. of Indiana. I just had to know what was wrong > with him physically or if it was just part of the > disease. We should be able to get preliminary results > soon, but the toxicology report will take over a week. > Of course, the brain tissue research will be several > months. > > I hope none of you have to make this decision. I > fought it right to the end. His funeral will be > Wednesday, and our daughter is making a computerized > picture presentation with thoughts from the > kids/grandkids/great grandkids included. Please keep > us in your thoughts and prayers. > > > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ > Cheap Talk? Check out Yahoo! Messenger's low PC-to-Phone call rates > (http://voice.yahoo.com) > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 6, 2006 Report Share Posted November 6, 2006 Dearest June - You and all your family - your beloved Darrell, too - are in my prayers. Peace. Lin " J. Brock " wrote: June, My deepest sympathy and prayers are with you. June Christensen wrote: Someone said that the hardest thing they had to do was to put their LO in a nursing home. No, the hardest thing you have to do is make a decision to sign a DNR and allow your LO to die. Darrell died last night just before 10 o'clock after four days of food and water restriction. About halfway through, I thought that I had made the wrong decision, as I didn't think it would take so long and be so hard to watch. The next morning, our minister came in, and I told him that. He said " No, you didn't. " We had two hospital stays in the month of October, both times 5-6 hours in the ER being poked, probed, IV'd with antibiotices, rehydrated, x-rayed, CT scanned, and finally returned to the NH. The last time the doctor said he couldn't do anything more to help him. There was little more than a week between the two times before he had to return. I could not put him through it again, and if it would have made him well, I would have done it in a heartbeat. So, I will always have to wonder if I did the right thing, but I know he is out of that miserable existence of dementia. When he took his last breaths, it was quick and appeared to be painless. He had been treated with Tylenol suppositories and morphine for fever and pain; they kept his mouth moistened as much as possible. Our last daughter came at 3:30 yesterday, and I truly think he was waiting on her. All the children, grandchildren, and great granchildren that were close enough came at least once. I did authorize the autopsy to include the body as well as the brain tissue that is being sent to the Univ. of Indiana. I just had to know what was wrong with him physically or if it was just part of the disease. We should be able to get preliminary results soon, but the toxicology report will take over a week. Of course, the brain tissue research will be several months. I hope none of you have to make this decision. I fought it right to the end. His funeral will be Wednesday, and our daughter is making a computerized picture presentation with thoughts from the kids/grandkids/great grandkids included. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers. __________________________________________________________ Cheap Talk? Check out Yahoo! Messenger's low PC-to-Phone call rates (http://voice.yahoo.com) --------------------------------- Cheap Talk? Check out Yahoo! Messenger's low PC-to-Phone call rates. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 9, 2006 Report Share Posted November 9, 2006 I wish I could have, but when I sat on the edge of his bed, it apparently caused him pain, as he moaned. I just stood beside the bed or pulled the chair up, as did the grandkids and kids. --- Gurganus wrote: > June, > > I understand how hard this was for you. Anytime you > have to make a > hard decision like that, remember the results won't > be perfect either > way. You did what you thought was best. God us so > gracious and > understanding. Cast all your cares upon him -- he's > got bigger > shoulders than you do. Then crawl up in his lap and > snuggle down and > get some rest. I hope the time with friends and > family can be special > for you, in spite of the pain. > > G > > > > ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Yahoo! Music Unlimited Access over 1 million songs. http://music.yahoo.com/unlimited Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2006 Report Share Posted November 10, 2006 June, Sorry, I didn't clarify what I meant. I was speaking figuratively of crawling up in God's lap and snuggling down. If we can find a place to snuggle, maybe with one of those new plush throws, or with a cat or dog, and imagine ourselves snuggled up like a child on God's lap, sometimes we can let go and feel real relief. > > > June, > > > > I understand how hard this was for you. Anytime you > > have to make a > > hard decision like that, remember the results won't > > be perfect either > > way. You did what you thought was best. God us so > > gracious and > > understanding. Cast all your cares upon him -- he's > > got bigger > > shoulders than you do. Then crawl up in his lap and > > snuggle down and > > get some rest. I hope the time with friends and > > family can be special > > for you, in spite of the pain. > > > > G > > > > > > > > > > > > > _____________________________________________________________________ _______________ > Yahoo! Music Unlimited > Access over 1 million songs. > http://music.yahoo.com/unlimited > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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