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Hi,

I hope this is relevant. I have read some items from Albert Ellis. In his

book about how to stop upsetting ourselves he mentions that we could help

ourselves feel better by and I am paraphrasing here, believing that whatever we

do is right. I have been giving myself a break by believing that whatever I do

is right. I know it sound simple and I am not sure exactly how he put it but,

does that helps me everytime . When I remember to notice myself getting down on

me. I think, whatever I do is the right thing to do. No matter what it is.

Robyn

-------------- Original message ----------------------

> If it can be true for us that we are not our thoughts could it also be

> possible that we are not our personalities. I sometimes find I make the

> decision to do things or be a certain way with the thought that that is

> just the way I am. That is what I usually do and the way I usually

> react. If I don't hang on so tightly to my idea of who I am and how I

> am pulled to respond to life then I can be open to more possibilities,

> more effective ways of being. I really find this helps with depression.

> It makes for living a more vital and interesting life and I feel less

> like I've been down this road before...

>

>

If it can be true for us that we are not our thoughts could it also be

possible that we are not our personalities. I sometimes find I make the

decision to do things or be a certain way with the thought that that is

just the way I am. That is what I usually do and the way I usually

react. If I don't hang on so tightly to my idea of who I am and how I

am pulled to respond to life then I can be open to more possibilities,

more effective ways of being. I really find this helps with depression.

It makes for living a more vital and interesting life and I feel less

like I've been down this road before...

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Robyn,

I am not familiar with Ellis's work. I find that whatever I think is

*OK*. Thoughts are thoughts. What I choose to do or not do is a

different story. I see judging the effects of my actions as *good* or

*bad* as only seeing things in absolute terms. It's either this or

that and in reality it's more subtle than that. What outcome I get

can be 80% right and 20% wrong or 70% wrong and 30% right. Then too

there can be 100 different *right* answers to the same problem. Not

any one being any better than another. I can easily get caught up

thinking there is only one good way to do something or one perfect

solution. I'd be careful thinking everything you do is right. What

might be more consistent with ACT is to ask your self does this work

in my life and is this action consistent with my values. Then make

your decision and hope something *good* comes of it. Life can be

pretty confusing at times. It is really the process that matters more

than the outcome. If I don't see things as *either* *or* I can have

much more flexibility in my thinking. I also don't have to see my way

as the only way. Life happens…and sh*t happens. I just want to feel I

am really living my life to the fullest no matter what.

>

> Hi,

>

> I hope this is relevant. I have read some items from Albert

Ellis. In his book about how to stop upsetting ourselves he mentions

that we could help ourselves feel better by and I am paraphrasing

here, believing that whatever we do is right. I have been giving

myself a break by believing that whatever I do is right. I know it

sound simple and I am not sure exactly how he put it but, does that

helps me everytime . When I remember to notice myself getting down

on me. I think, whatever I do is the right thing to do. No matter

what it is.

>

> Robyn

>

>

>

>

>

> -------------- Original message ----------------------

>

> > If it can be true for us that we are not our thoughts could it

also be

> > possible that we are not our personalities. I sometimes find I

make the

> > decision to do things or be a certain way with the thought that

that is

> > just the way I am. That is what I usually do and the way I

usually

> > react. If I don't hang on so tightly to my idea of who I am and

how I

> > am pulled to respond to life then I can be open to more

possibilities,

> > more effective ways of being. I really find this helps with

depression.

> > It makes for living a more vital and interesting life and I feel

less

> > like I've been down this road before...

> >

> >

>

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