Re: Does it ever end??? compare and contrast of interest areas

[Guest guest]

EVEN WHEN IM AT WORK I FEEL THE NEED TO THINK AND

> TALK ABOUT AUTISM, OR VACCINES, OR WFGF DIETS,

> MEDICATIONS FOR KIDS, THERAPY, REGIONAL CENTERS,

> SPEECH, ON AND ON AND ON. NO WONDER NONE OF MY

> FRIENDS WANT TO HANG OUT WITH ME...I THOUGHT IT WAS

> BECAUSE OF ELLA, BUT THEY PROBABLY JUST DONT WANT TO

> LISTEN TO ME EXPLAIN THE STEPS AND DETAILS OF PECS

> OR DTT. I GUESS WHAT I FIND INTERESTING NOW IS VERY

> DIFFERENT THEN WHAT THEY DO.

The above shares in great detail why many with AS get shunned in

life because they have no words or interest to share outside of the

current issues/interest and so speak of their interest much over and

over to where no one wants to be around them because they cant

endure your mass of words over and over that does not connect to

their interest or patience.

Yet with AS many are not able to monitor and or be of aware they are

boring others with it.

the other factor is look how much NT's research and read and invest

in learning on autism once thems child is dx and they become so

consumed by the words of it and yet at same time they are acting

much like those with AS the only difference is the interest might be

of things others percieve as odd.

NTs who focus to autism often have many others who share the same

interest of autism informations so the connect is of mutually shared

and sought out and reinforced. but if one with AS did this to the

same extend on washers or garage door openers and such how many of

us would be pateint and who would endure it as they have few who can

or will share the same interest. It lockes them often out of the

same social connects that autism words can bring.

Yet even many parents who do this in autism will say and or complain

of how do I turn off the scripts of my child who talks about weather

and tornadoes all day long. would it be easy for all those around

you to stop you interest of autism and or scripts. You might argue

well I to need to invest and learn for my child and so give off

excuses why you need to do what you do to an excessive level and yet

the child or person of AS might too find hims own interests to be

just as rewarding internally to them even though it provides no

outside reinforcers it gives us great inner pleasure and so

reinforces our own beings as we research or play in our interest

areas.

Just somethings to think about........................ if those with

NT want to be validated in their resons for to self endulge into the

interest of autism and such no matter what the trigger to do so ,

then shouldnot parents understand the same core things happen to

many on the spectrum and yet they are not validated as important and

so is something people try to extinguish. You might argue and say

well train schedules have no purpose or meaning that can be useful

or their interest has no purpose? But in true that is from NT

perspectives to us it has its purpose to us as well. It is just a

purpose not often understood or respected. Not wanting to direct

this to any ones person but just a sharing of the two very similar

but different thinkings and such.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

i to hope you to not feel as though I to be to directed

words to refelct you are of bad parent as you to say this " I to be to

get punished this day for doing right for my DD " I to hope you words

to know my words were not directed to any here but was a reflection of

the words shared as it triggered a compare and contrast. I to be to

know that yes best to be to try to reach us at time in our levels of

interest and thinking and many parents do. But many do not and many

professionals advise against of it trying to diminish any signs of our

autistic beings and to me it is ever so sad. I to think what should be

teached more is balance between both worlds.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

yes i to be adult with autism in Ohio I to refer to self

as HFA because I to ahve some higher functioning life skills and

functional skills. I to also be parent to 4 diagnosed with aspergers

syndrome.

Sondra

In Autism_in_Girls , Mateosian

<cjoibm@g...> wrote:

> Oh, Sondra,

> I strongly agree with you!

> I am away from my main computer. Are you a young woman or

> an adult with some degree of autism, yourself?

> The stories and histories of all the lists I am on begin to blur

> in my mind and my memory is not as good as it used to be.

> Thank you, for your ideas,

> ...

>

>

>

> >

> > ...trying to diminish any signs of our autistic beings and to me

it is

> >

> ever so sad. I to think what should be teached more is balance

> >

> between both worlds.

> >

> Sondra

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

yes i to be adult with autism in Ohio I to refer to self

as HFA because I to ahve some higher functioning life skills and

functional skills. I to also be parent to 4 diagnosed with aspergers

syndrome.

Sondra

In Autism_in_Girls , Mateosian

<cjoibm@g...> wrote:

> Oh, Sondra,

> I strongly agree with you!

> I am away from my main computer. Are you a young woman or

> an adult with some degree of autism, yourself?

> The stories and histories of all the lists I am on begin to blur

> in my mind and my memory is not as good as it used to be.

> Thank you, for your ideas,

> ...

>

>

>

> >

> > ...trying to diminish any signs of our autistic beings and to me

it is

> >

> ever so sad. I to think what should be teached more is balance

> >

> between both worlds.

> >

> Sondra

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

yes i to be adult with autism in Ohio I to refer to self

as HFA because I to ahve some higher functioning life skills and

functional skills. I to also be parent to 4 diagnosed with aspergers

syndrome.

Sondra

In Autism_in_Girls , Mateosian

<cjoibm@g...> wrote:

> Oh, Sondra,

> I strongly agree with you!

> I am away from my main computer. Are you a young woman or

> an adult with some degree of autism, yourself?

> The stories and histories of all the lists I am on begin to blur

> in my mind and my memory is not as good as it used to be.

> Thank you, for your ideas,

> ...

>

>

>

> >

> > ...trying to diminish any signs of our autistic beings and to me

it is

> >

> ever so sad. I to think what should be teached more is balance

> >

> between both worlds.

> >

> Sondra

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Grace you have of healthy balance and boundaries and it will by far

make you life less complicated becuas ein you life you have of the

connect memory to match of the raising of you childrens such as the

lining up, the play on words and such it will be of joint memory that

both of you will be to cherish for a life time.

And in true bet you didnot think you were losing her ornot connected

to her, when you played of this way at her level of being, but

instead gained her attenion in ways programs might not have? I to bet

strong connect was felt and both of you had waht is termed shared play

that was mutually gratifying.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

Grace you have of healthy balance and boundaries and it will by far

make you life less complicated becuas ein you life you have of the

connect memory to match of the raising of you childrens such as the

lining up, the play on words and such it will be of joint memory that

both of you will be to cherish for a life time.

And in true bet you didnot think you were losing her ornot connected

to her, when you played of this way at her level of being, but

instead gained her attenion in ways programs might not have? I to bet

strong connect was felt and both of you had waht is termed shared play

that was mutually gratifying.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

Grace you have of healthy balance and boundaries and it will by far

make you life less complicated becuas ein you life you have of the

connect memory to match of the raising of you childrens such as the

lining up, the play on words and such it will be of joint memory that

both of you will be to cherish for a life time.

And in true bet you didnot think you were losing her ornot connected

to her, when you played of this way at her level of being, but

instead gained her attenion in ways programs might not have? I to bet

strong connect was felt and both of you had waht is termed shared play

that was mutually gratifying.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

I think parents understand this more and more. At home I try to let

Allie do what ever she wants, but our problem is it consists with

dumping out toys, turning over table lamps, dumping bookcases, etc.

<sigh> If only she'd just wanna line up things!

Allie stayed at a friend's house one day and they loved it when they

walked into the dining room and she had a fruit bowl of apples and

oranges lined by type and size across the table. They took a picture

of it they like it so much. So harmless and fun.

Debi

[Guest guest]

I think parents understand this more and more. At home I try to let

Allie do what ever she wants, but our problem is it consists with

dumping out toys, turning over table lamps, dumping bookcases, etc.

<sigh> If only she'd just wanna line up things!

Allie stayed at a friend's house one day and they loved it when they

walked into the dining room and she had a fruit bowl of apples and

oranges lined by type and size across the table. They took a picture

of it they like it so much. So harmless and fun.

Debi

[Guest guest]

Debi do you to have space to make a kid proofed areas and be to put

up gate or half door for play things and then it can be a safe mess

place and be more structured to be dumping out of play things and

not house hold things . This is not a good down for her to run amuch

as she may need some direction of WHAT to do as she is on down time.

Such as if she can or has of interest to set out a few wooden

puzzles. A movie, or a certain play bin of blocks or toy cars or

whatever but structure her play and maybe have another join in her

play in way of play not teaching as in ABA style but play style

being silly with her and letting her lead and give lots of verbal

reinforcers of the play and such.

Some with autism do not have of direct play skills and some need to

learn some skills so down time is of meaning to them in thier own

fashions but not in destructive ways or ways that cause disruptions

to the family as a whole or that might not be of safe such as

tipping lamps over due to getting shocked or to catch house to fire.

Fot this child then the balance is more to direct one to one or

small group directed play but not in ABA stule but maybe more RDI

style to get of her to imitate and attend in play fashions.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

Debi do you to have space to make a kid proofed areas and be to put

up gate or half door for play things and then it can be a safe mess

place and be more structured to be dumping out of play things and

not house hold things . This is not a good down for her to run amuch

as she may need some direction of WHAT to do as she is on down time.

Such as if she can or has of interest to set out a few wooden

puzzles. A movie, or a certain play bin of blocks or toy cars or

whatever but structure her play and maybe have another join in her

play in way of play not teaching as in ABA style but play style

being silly with her and letting her lead and give lots of verbal

reinforcers of the play and such.

Some with autism do not have of direct play skills and some need to

learn some skills so down time is of meaning to them in thier own

fashions but not in destructive ways or ways that cause disruptions

to the family as a whole or that might not be of safe such as

tipping lamps over due to getting shocked or to catch house to fire.

Fot this child then the balance is more to direct one to one or

small group directed play but not in ABA stule but maybe more RDI

style to get of her to imitate and attend in play fashions.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

Debi do you to have space to make a kid proofed areas and be to put

up gate or half door for play things and then it can be a safe mess

place and be more structured to be dumping out of play things and

not house hold things . This is not a good down for her to run amuch

as she may need some direction of WHAT to do as she is on down time.

Such as if she can or has of interest to set out a few wooden

puzzles. A movie, or a certain play bin of blocks or toy cars or

whatever but structure her play and maybe have another join in her

play in way of play not teaching as in ABA style but play style

being silly with her and letting her lead and give lots of verbal

reinforcers of the play and such.

Some with autism do not have of direct play skills and some need to

learn some skills so down time is of meaning to them in thier own

fashions but not in destructive ways or ways that cause disruptions

to the family as a whole or that might not be of safe such as

tipping lamps over due to getting shocked or to catch house to fire.

Fot this child then the balance is more to direct one to one or

small group directed play but not in ABA stule but maybe more RDI

style to get of her to imitate and attend in play fashions.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

Don't get me wrong for even an instant, Debi. I was merely listing the

stuff I did allow.

Don't even get me started on the stuff I do NOT allow, or live life to

prevent. UGH UGH!!

Yep on the dumping.... Raiding... Smearing.... Breaking....

Demolishing....

Destroying..... Like I said, don't get me started.

{ yes this is called parenting and we to all do this even for our

toddlers and such for to protect of them and to teach of them but it

is harder because we to find that even after the toddler years we are

still working on toddler issues for a child who is bigger and stronger

and so it can be all consuming to keep of their busy minds intertained

in the down time.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

Don't get me wrong for even an instant, Debi. I was merely listing the

stuff I did allow.

Don't even get me started on the stuff I do NOT allow, or live life to

prevent. UGH UGH!!

Yep on the dumping.... Raiding... Smearing.... Breaking....

Demolishing....

Destroying..... Like I said, don't get me started.

{ yes this is called parenting and we to all do this even for our

toddlers and such for to protect of them and to teach of them but it

is harder because we to find that even after the toddler years we are

still working on toddler issues for a child who is bigger and stronger

and so it can be all consuming to keep of their busy minds intertained

in the down time.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

Don't get me wrong for even an instant, Debi. I was merely listing the

stuff I did allow.

Don't even get me started on the stuff I do NOT allow, or live life to

prevent. UGH UGH!!

Yep on the dumping.... Raiding... Smearing.... Breaking....

Demolishing....

Destroying..... Like I said, don't get me started.

{ yes this is called parenting and we to all do this even for our

toddlers and such for to protect of them and to teach of them but it

is harder because we to find that even after the toddler years we are

still working on toddler issues for a child who is bigger and stronger

and so it can be all consuming to keep of their busy minds intertained

in the down time.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

I work with her on it, she is allowed to dump toys all the time, I

just ask her to pick them up when she's finishes. I think lots of time

she's dumping because she's searching for that 1 toy she's really

wanting at the moment. I've tried sorting toys to many smaller

containers and labeling to make it easier to see the toys and get what

she wants, but then she dumps them all in one big pile. I welcome any

thoughts on this!!! I've been trying to figure it out. They say at

school " Allie is the best cleaner-upper we have " and at home she's

destructive, I can't figure it out. I usually take solace in knowing

that " it too shall come to pass " . Lol.

I think the lamp thing she does to get a rise out of me. I've told her

repeatedly " That's a special antique lamp, please do not knock it

over. Mommy loves this lamp. " Then next time my back is turned, wham!

Debi

> Debi do you to have space to make a kid proofed areas and be to put

> up gate or half door for play things and then it can be a safe mess

> place and be more structured to be dumping out of play things and

> not house hold things .

[Guest guest]

I work with her on it, she is allowed to dump toys all the time, I

just ask her to pick them up when she's finishes. I think lots of time

she's dumping because she's searching for that 1 toy she's really

wanting at the moment. I've tried sorting toys to many smaller

containers and labeling to make it easier to see the toys and get what

she wants, but then she dumps them all in one big pile. I welcome any

thoughts on this!!! I've been trying to figure it out. They say at

school " Allie is the best cleaner-upper we have " and at home she's

destructive, I can't figure it out. I usually take solace in knowing

that " it too shall come to pass " . Lol.

I think the lamp thing she does to get a rise out of me. I've told her

repeatedly " That's a special antique lamp, please do not knock it

over. Mommy loves this lamp. " Then next time my back is turned, wham!

Debi

> Debi do you to have space to make a kid proofed areas and be to put

> up gate or half door for play things and then it can be a safe mess

> place and be more structured to be dumping out of play things and

> not house hold things .

[Guest guest]

I work with her on it, she is allowed to dump toys all the time, I

just ask her to pick them up when she's finishes. I think lots of time

she's dumping because she's searching for that 1 toy she's really

wanting at the moment. I've tried sorting toys to many smaller

containers and labeling to make it easier to see the toys and get what

she wants, but then she dumps them all in one big pile. I welcome any

thoughts on this!!! I've been trying to figure it out. They say at

school " Allie is the best cleaner-upper we have " and at home she's

destructive, I can't figure it out. I usually take solace in knowing

that " it too shall come to pass " . Lol.

I think the lamp thing she does to get a rise out of me. I've told her

repeatedly " That's a special antique lamp, please do not knock it

over. Mommy loves this lamp. " Then next time my back is turned, wham!

Debi

> Debi do you to have space to make a kid proofed areas and be to put

> up gate or half door for play things and then it can be a safe mess

> place and be more structured to be dumping out of play things and

> not house hold things .

[Guest guest]

Not to worry, I welcome any advice!

Debi

> Don't get me wrong for even an instant, Debi.

[Guest guest]

Not to worry, I welcome any advice!

Debi

> Don't get me wrong for even an instant, Debi.

[Guest guest]

Not to worry, I welcome any advice!

Debi

> Don't get me wrong for even an instant, Debi.

[Guest guest]

I think the lamp thing she does to get a rise out of me. I've told

her

repeatedly " That's a special antique lamp, please do not knock it

over. Mommy loves this lamp. " Then next time my back is turned, wham

Debi

LOL sounds like this is of it to me she is using it to get the

pronounced body language and words that change in pitch and it is of

the cause and effect she to enjoys and she may lack the value of the

lanp but knows attention has been of voiced aobut this onject and

knows it is of a trigger to gain of interactions from you to her in

direct LOL she is of ever so cute .

Debi I to know you are of good mom and do work much hard to you

childrens but was unsure if you to had of room of play that can be

of boundary space for her to learn messes are there not in the main

part of house.

About destructive things yes my childrens did of much the same and

ruined many things repeatedly and yes my mikey to was rescusing the

ninja turtle guys by flushing them down the sewers to thems home and

it clogged much times to us. he to also use to be to pee in register

vents and make such odors in the home.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

I think the lamp thing she does to get a rise out of me. I've told

her

repeatedly " That's a special antique lamp, please do not knock it

over. Mommy loves this lamp. " Then next time my back is turned, wham

Debi

LOL sounds like this is of it to me she is using it to get the

pronounced body language and words that change in pitch and it is of

the cause and effect she to enjoys and she may lack the value of the

lanp but knows attention has been of voiced aobut this onject and

knows it is of a trigger to gain of interactions from you to her in

direct LOL she is of ever so cute .

Debi I to know you are of good mom and do work much hard to you

childrens but was unsure if you to had of room of play that can be

of boundary space for her to learn messes are there not in the main

part of house.

About destructive things yes my childrens did of much the same and

ruined many things repeatedly and yes my mikey to was rescusing the

ninja turtle guys by flushing them down the sewers to thems home and

it clogged much times to us. he to also use to be to pee in register

vents and make such odors in the home.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

I think the lamp thing she does to get a rise out of me. I've told

her

repeatedly " That's a special antique lamp, please do not knock it

over. Mommy loves this lamp. " Then next time my back is turned, wham

Debi

LOL sounds like this is of it to me she is using it to get the

pronounced body language and words that change in pitch and it is of

the cause and effect she to enjoys and she may lack the value of the

lanp but knows attention has been of voiced aobut this onject and

knows it is of a trigger to gain of interactions from you to her in

direct LOL she is of ever so cute .

Debi I to know you are of good mom and do work much hard to you

childrens but was unsure if you to had of room of play that can be

of boundary space for her to learn messes are there not in the main

part of house.

About destructive things yes my childrens did of much the same and

ruined many things repeatedly and yes my mikey to was rescusing the

ninja turtle guys by flushing them down the sewers to thems home and

it clogged much times to us. he to also use to be to pee in register

vents and make such odors in the home.

Sondra