2 questions/ need for clarification

[Guest guest]

#1- would like some further explanation of the the terms

'high-functioning' vs. 'low-functioning.

#2-have seen some references to 'alters'. I know that

sometimes bpd coexists with Dissociative Identity

Disorder/MPD, however, are people here saying that these alters

can be present with bpd alone? Thanks.

[Guest guest]

I'm not sure of all the details, but from this list I can tell you some of the

low vs high functioning.

My nada is very high. She was a school teacher and then principal of a small

church school.

No one but me ever got verbally abused that I know of. The subtle ways that she

undermined me escaped everybody.

On the other hand I guess low functioning would be those nadas with fullblown

rages, no friends, dirty houses etc.

About disassosciation - Bpd can exist with plenty of other mental illnesses

so.....

They can disassociate to escpe the intense feelings they have. They can even

lose touch with reality for a brief period of time.

Have you read THE book for surviving BPD? - Stop Walking on Eggshells? It's got

all this kind of info.

Ilene in TX

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

Like Ilene said, you can find info on this in SWOE, but my

understanding of low vs. high-functioning is how well they can

function in society. A BPD that " acts in " (cutting, suicide

attempts and threats), or can't keep a job or care for

her/himself would be low-functioning. A BPD that can appear

" normal " when desired and hold down a job would be

high-functioning. I would guess that low-functioning would also

be more prone to physically abusing their kids. As with

everything, there is a continuum here, too. Unfortunately,

high-functioning BPs rarely seek treatment, or are

high-functioning enough that they are misdiagnosed (to the best

of my knowledge, my mother has not been diagnosed as BP,

although she has been in and out of therapy for a long time).

This means the medical community only has experience with

low-functioning BPs, so they don't really understand what a lot

of us are going through.

And like Ilene said, it's not uncommon for BPD to be blended

with other PDs (I think my mom has a few narcissistic traits).

It's my understanding that in *severe* cases (or extreme

situations), BPDs can dissociate. It's not uncommon for BPs to

claim that they have no memory of an event, but it's hard to

tell if they really don't remember it, or if they're just lying.

Hope this helps.

Anon

--- maddnotbadd wrote:

> #1- would like some further explanation of the the terms

> 'high-functioning' vs. 'low-functioning.

> #2-have seen some references to 'alters'. I know that

> sometimes bpd coexists with Dissociative Identity

> Disorder/MPD, however, are people here saying that these

> alters

> can be present with bpd alone? Thanks.

>

>

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

so what is SWOE? is there a list of all the abreviations that are

commonly used on this list?

** , Stinky's caretaker**

" The last of the human freedoms is to choose one's attitude in any

given set of circumstances " V. l

[Guest guest]

I had a friend who was high functioning some of the time - especially in the

work environment - and low functioning at others -usually in her

interpersonal relationships and even more so with her daughter, who was the

target of most of her rages...there were very few people at work who really

got a clue as to how seriously out of control she could get except at the

end, when her stress was so high that she couldn't contain her rage...then

she just up and quit and ran away.

Re: 2 questions/ need for clarification

>

>

> I'm not sure of all the details, but from this list I can tell you some of

the

> low vs high functioning.

> My nada is very high. She was a school teacher and then principal of a

small

> church school.

> No one but me ever got verbally abused that I know of. The subtle ways

that she

> undermined me escaped everybody.

> On the other hand I guess low functioning would be those nadas with

fullblown

> rages, no friends, dirty houses etc.

>

> About disassosciation - Bpd can exist with plenty of other mental

illnesses

> so.....

> They can disassociate to escpe the intense feelings they have. They can

even

> lose touch with reality for a brief period of time.

>

> Have you read THE book for surviving BPD? - Stop Walking on Eggshells?

It's got

> all this kind of info.

>

> Ilene in TX

>

>

>

>

> To get off the list, send a blank message to

ModOasis-unsubscribe . Send questions & concerns to

ModOasis-owner . " Stop Waking on Eggshells, " a primer for

non-BPs can be ordered via 1-888-35-SHELL (). For the table of

contents, see http://www.BPDCentral.com

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I had a friend who was high functioning some of the time - especially in the

work environment - and low functioning at others -usually in her

interpersonal relationships and even more so with her daughter, who was the

target of most of her rages...there were very few people at work who really

got a clue as to how seriously out of control she could get except at the

end, when her stress was so high that she couldn't contain her rage...then

she just up and quit and ran away.

Re: 2 questions/ need for clarification

>

>

> I'm not sure of all the details, but from this list I can tell you some of

the

> low vs high functioning.

> My nada is very high. She was a school teacher and then principal of a

small

> church school.

> No one but me ever got verbally abused that I know of. The subtle ways

that she

> undermined me escaped everybody.

> On the other hand I guess low functioning would be those nadas with

fullblown

> rages, no friends, dirty houses etc.

>

> About disassosciation - Bpd can exist with plenty of other mental

illnesses

> so.....

> They can disassociate to escpe the intense feelings they have. They can

even

> lose touch with reality for a brief period of time.

>

> Have you read THE book for surviving BPD? - Stop Walking on Eggshells?

It's got

> all this kind of info.

>

> Ilene in TX

>

>

>

>

> To get off the list, send a blank message to

ModOasis-unsubscribe . Send questions & concerns to

ModOasis-owner . " Stop Waking on Eggshells, " a primer for

non-BPs can be ordered via 1-888-35-SHELL (). For the table of

contents, see http://www.BPDCentral.com

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I had a friend who was high functioning some of the time - especially in the

work environment - and low functioning at others -usually in her

interpersonal relationships and even more so with her daughter, who was the

target of most of her rages...there were very few people at work who really

got a clue as to how seriously out of control she could get except at the

end, when her stress was so high that she couldn't contain her rage...then

she just up and quit and ran away.

Re: 2 questions/ need for clarification

>

>

> I'm not sure of all the details, but from this list I can tell you some of

the

> low vs high functioning.

> My nada is very high. She was a school teacher and then principal of a

small

> church school.

> No one but me ever got verbally abused that I know of. The subtle ways

that she

> undermined me escaped everybody.

> On the other hand I guess low functioning would be those nadas with

fullblown

> rages, no friends, dirty houses etc.

>

> About disassosciation - Bpd can exist with plenty of other mental

illnesses

> so.....

> They can disassociate to escpe the intense feelings they have. They can

even

> lose touch with reality for a brief period of time.

>

> Have you read THE book for surviving BPD? - Stop Walking on Eggshells?

It's got

> all this kind of info.

>

> Ilene in TX

>

>

>

>

> To get off the list, send a blank message to

ModOasis-unsubscribe . Send questions & concerns to

ModOasis-owner . " Stop Waking on Eggshells, " a primer for

non-BPs can be ordered via 1-888-35-SHELL (). For the table of

contents, see http://www.BPDCentral.com

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

wrote:

<<

, your friend's description is a VERY close match to my Father's

wife-extremely high-functioning in public, especially work....extremely

low-functioning in private. This has caused the confusion disbelief problems

others have described also. Very frustrating to say the least.

>>

Hi ,

BPDs are like chameleons -- they act like whomever they're with.

Think of the BPD as an actor/actress. Because of their very tiny and/or

fragmented Self, they wear a different 'mask' for each person they meet in

public. But, the mask gets tooooo heavy and they drop it behind the closed

doors of Home Sweet Home.

So, we KOs got to see behind the mask -- ie, we got to see our own " Mommy,

Dearest " .

Cheers,

Edith

[Guest guest]

wrote:

<<

, your friend's description is a VERY close match to my Father's

wife-extremely high-functioning in public, especially work....extremely

low-functioning in private. This has caused the confusion disbelief problems

others have described also. Very frustrating to say the least.

>>

Hi ,

BPDs are like chameleons -- they act like whomever they're with.

Think of the BPD as an actor/actress. Because of their very tiny and/or

fragmented Self, they wear a different 'mask' for each person they meet in

public. But, the mask gets tooooo heavy and they drop it behind the closed

doors of Home Sweet Home.

So, we KOs got to see behind the mask -- ie, we got to see our own " Mommy,

Dearest " .

Cheers,

Edith

[Guest guest]

Oh yeah, would the real person please stand up!!!!...my friend joined our

Church and her performance there was unbelievable except I know you will

believe...warmth, love, gentle caring...I had people telling me how

wonderful she was...and telling her that...meanwhile, in her other world,

she was terrorizing the old lady she boarded with, as only an out of

control, enraged borderline can inflict terror...this poor woman finally

phoned me and begged me to help...I did not want to report my friend to the

authorities so, instead I phoned the woman's doctor and let him know he

needed to check in on her...her doctor did the reporting...of course, the

authorities did not take action and a couple of weeks later I got another

call from one of the ladies friends again begging me to go over and

intervene...apparently my girlfriend was literally tearing up the house and

throwing stuff out of drawers (the friend had taken a threatening letter she

had written and she was looking for it)...again, I refused because I knew

there would be nothing I could do if I did go over and I was still hoping to

stay out of the picture so that I might be able to get her the help she

needed when she cooled down...that's when the old ladies friend called the

police...so here I was, knowing all this was going on and then watching her

play the angel in church...ah, the land of Oz

re: 2 questions/ need for clarification

> wrote:

>

> <<

> , your friend's description is a VERY close match to my Father's

> wife-extremely high-functioning in public, especially work....extremely

> low-functioning in private. This has caused the confusion disbelief

problems

> others have described also. Very frustrating to say the least.

> >>

>

>

> Hi ,

>

> BPDs are like chameleons -- they act like whomever they're with.

>

> Think of the BPD as an actor/actress. Because of their very tiny and/or

> fragmented Self, they wear a different 'mask' for each person they meet in

> public. But, the mask gets tooooo heavy and they drop it behind the closed

> doors of Home Sweet Home.

>

> So, we KOs got to see behind the mask -- ie, we got to see our own " Mommy,

> Dearest " .

>

> Cheers,

>

> Edith

>

>

>

> To get off the list, send a blank message to

ModOasis-unsubscribe . Send questions & concerns to

ModOasis-owner . " Stop Waking on Eggshells, " a primer for

non-BPs can be ordered via 1-888-35-SHELL (). For the table of

contents, see http://www.BPDCentral.com

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

wrote:

<<

, your friend's description is a VERY close

match to my

Father's

wife-extremely high-functioning in public, especially

work....extremely

low-functioning in private. This has caused the

confusion disbelief

problems

others have described also. Very frustrating to say

the least.

>>

Hi ,

BPDs are like chameleons -- they act like whomever

they're with.

Think of the BPD as an actor/actress. Because of their

very tiny and/or

fragmented Self, they wear a different 'mask' for each

person they meet

in

public. But, the mask gets tooooo heavy and they drop

it behind the

closed

doors of Home Sweet Home.

So, we KOs got to see behind the mask -- ie, we got to

see our own

" Mommy,

Dearest " .

Cheers,

Edith

----------End of Original Message-------------

Edith -

Thank you so much for sharing that. When my BP-mother

cruelly decided to leave my father, she moved in with

a family, where the wife had a speech impediment. Do

you know, that my mother developed exactly the same

speech impediment! It was uncanny.

I always used to describe her as a blob looking for a

mold. Once again, what an enlightening thought, to

know that the BPD is responsible for this. It's

amazing how all the pieces are coming together.

Patty

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

wrote:

<<

, your friend's description is a VERY close

match to my

Father's

wife-extremely high-functioning in public, especially

work....extremely

low-functioning in private. This has caused the

confusion disbelief

problems

others have described also. Very frustrating to say

the least.

>>

Hi ,

BPDs are like chameleons -- they act like whomever

they're with.

Think of the BPD as an actor/actress. Because of their

very tiny and/or

fragmented Self, they wear a different 'mask' for each

person they meet

in

public. But, the mask gets tooooo heavy and they drop

it behind the

closed

doors of Home Sweet Home.

So, we KOs got to see behind the mask -- ie, we got to

see our own

" Mommy,

Dearest " .

Cheers,

Edith

----------End of Original Message-------------

Edith -

Thank you so much for sharing that. When my BP-mother

cruelly decided to leave my father, she moved in with

a family, where the wife had a speech impediment. Do

you know, that my mother developed exactly the same

speech impediment! It was uncanny.

I always used to describe her as a blob looking for a

mold. Once again, what an enlightening thought, to

know that the BPD is responsible for this. It's

amazing how all the pieces are coming together.

Patty

__________________________________________________