Re: Life events & I wish I could trust but I can't

[Guest guest]

Oh , I'm so sorry! How awful for you and no one to talk to. Are you

saying that your husband may also be BP?

Of course, I'm sure that he's grieving , too, but that wasn't very supportive of

him. I wish I could give you a hug.

Go cry and grieve and do what you need to do. We'll be here.

Ilene

[Guest guest]

Oh , I'm so sorry! How awful for you and no one to talk to. Are you

saying that your husband may also be BP?

Of course, I'm sure that he's grieving , too, but that wasn't very supportive of

him. I wish I could give you a hug.

Go cry and grieve and do what you need to do. We'll be here.

Ilene

[Guest guest]

odd...but the last half of this post got cut off so I'll continue it up

here.We thought we had another 2 days so sis's son went to visit a friend

and her daughter went out for a break.I had noticed that she was sleeping

peacefully and called my mother-in-law to reassure her all was well, hoping

that would deter her from another visit. Mom replied that she was coming so

I responded by saying that I would see her in a bit. Well, sis died right

there and then.They say that people can chose the time of their death and

that they can hear right up until the end so I can only imagine that the

timing might have been prompted by the phone call. And I can't say I blamed

her because I think I would do the same thing if our positions had been

reversed. Then we had the funeral where my in-laws portrayed the devasted,

grieving parents. I bought the whole picture until my husband told me that

he thought my sis's comment of how she was glad she had made peace with her

parents was a joke. He said this was just another example of how she was

still the same bitch she had always been, that she had not done anything to

make peace because she had never apologized to her parents. He said the only

thing that had changed was that his mom and dad had gone to visit her

because she was dying and they still thought the same about her that they

always had. When I expressed my dismay and that this made me wonder if I

could trust what his parents said and felt about me he got mad and told me

how things were always just about me. Am I nuts here?

Life events & I wish I could trust but I can't

> I am feeling so sick right now I can't even find the right words to

express it...my sister-in-law died after a brave fight with cancer...my

husband and her other sister never did go to the hospital to see her (she

was the so-called black sheep of the family) but my husband gave me his full

suppport to be at the hospital virtually every day for the last few

weeks...near the end, my sis shared with me how she had forgiven her parents

( my in-laws) ...I was really impressed at how my in-laws had put old

grievances aside and gone up to visit sis ...I had been there as she neared

the end and their loving concern seemed genuine...I also knew that my

mother-in-law was bound and determined that she was going to be there when

sis died...whether sis wanted her there or not...I also knew that the last

thing sis wanted at her deathbed was her mother...I am sure many of you can

relate...sis wanted just her children and her best friend to be

there...well, the doctor and nurses had indicated that we had approx another

2 da

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thank you, Ilene. I really am feeling quite isolated right now. Everyone

thinks my in-laws are these warm, loving, christian, upstanding people and

it's rather crazy making. I get quite confused because to my face that's how

they are with me but there is always that subtle undercurrent that I can't

put my finger on...I have isolated myself as much as I can ever since our

answering machine picked up the end of a conversation my mother-in-law had

with my husband when she knew I was at work. It was an eye opener in scorn

and manipulation. That was when I realized that there were 3 of us in my

marriage...it gets very draining always trying to keep my distance and not

letting down my guard. I had really been quite impressed at how supportive I

thought they had been to my sis and now I don't know what I think. I did

eventually confront my mother-in-law and told her she didn't have to pretend

to like me any more when it was obvious from how she talked about me behind

my back that she didn't. She responded by saying that " just because we don't

like each other doesn't mean we can't love each other. " That seems to be how

they felt about my sister-in-law. I don't understand. My husband is

definitely not BP and this is just a normal part of his family dynamics. He

honestly believes that his sister never changed and was still a bitch to her

dying day. I am just glad that I know differently and that I had the

privilege of recognizing her for the incredible lady that she grew into.She

really was the family scapegoat and she knew it. She told me how she had

gone to visit her grandfather when he had dimentia and she wasn't sure if he

would know her. Her grandfather did know her, called her by name, and told

her that her parents were wrong about her and then he went back into his

shell. Interesting that whenever she and I were together we chose not to

discuss her family. She did not badmouth them to me. That seems rather

ironic.

--- Original Message -----

To: <ModOasis >

Sent: Thursday, November 08, 2001 6:21 PM

Subject: Re: Life events & I wish I could trust but I can't

>

>

> Oh , I'm so sorry! How awful for you and no one to talk to. Are you

> saying that your husband may also be BP?

> Of course, I'm sure that he's grieving , too, but that wasn't very

supportive of

> him. I wish I could give you a hug.

> Go cry and grieve and do what you need to do. We'll be here.

>

> Ilene

>

>

>

> To get off the list, send a blank message to

ModOasis-unsubscribe . Send questions & concerns to

ModOasis-owner . " Stop Waking on Eggshells, " a primer for

non-BPs can be ordered via 1-888-35-SHELL (). For the table of

contents, see http://www.BPDCentral.com

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

All I can say is that your in-laws sound wierd. Keep your boundaries and good

luck. Too bad your husband felt this way.

I guess we all have our reasons for our actions, but some of us are more

reasonable than others. To not like someone, and still love them is one of the

strangest ideas I've ever heard, but I can see that it's part of some twisted

Christian teaching.( I'm a Christian, but not everyone is healthy!) I've heard

some similiar ideas over the years. I hope you make it thru the next few days -

I'm sure they'll be hard.

Hugs,

Ilene

[Guest guest]

wow ....God Bless you in your grief. Grief is always so hard. I

think you are correct about people choosing the when of dying.

My sister died when nada went to the bathroom, waited until

everyone was out of the room. I can understand that perfectly.

Please be very gentle with yourself, and let the words roll off as

people can get extremely harsh at death, and when people are

open wounds, the words can really hurt.

Focus on your friendship with your sis, and what you know was

real and let the rest roll off into crazy land where it belongs.

hugs,

Kathleen

[Guest guest]

--- ilene@... wrote:

To not like someone, and

> still love them is one of the

> strangest ideas I've ever heard

Actually, I understand this completely. I did not like

my ex very much but I did still love him. I think the

same might be said about some of us and our nada's...

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

--- ilene@... wrote:

To not like someone, and

> still love them is one of the

> strangest ideas I've ever heard

Actually, I understand this completely. I did not like

my ex very much but I did still love him. I think the

same might be said about some of us and our nada's...

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

--- ilene@... wrote:

To not like someone, and

> still love them is one of the

> strangest ideas I've ever heard

Actually, I understand this completely. I did not like

my ex very much but I did still love him. I think the

same might be said about some of us and our nada's...

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

I just read the context of the " Just because we don't

like each other doesn't mean we can't love each

other... " It IS twisted thinking! (But I still do know

what it feels like to not like someone but still love

them. But that's in a different context.)

As for still loving someone you don't like - how is it

possible??? Isn't love showing someone that you love

them??? Saying ugly things about people behind their

back is not loving. This woman is a crazy-maker to be

sure. Take a bit of truth and put that ole spin on it

to make it a lie - just ever so slightly to throw you

off balance.

Funny how your SIL's grandfather clung on long enough

to let her know she was OK... I've had a similar

experience. As for your SIL never badmouthing,

sometimes it's better to happy than right... maybe she

learned that. Something I'm working on...

Cyndie

--- wrote:

> Thank you, Ilene. I really am feeling quite isolated

> right now. Everyone

> thinks my in-laws are these warm, loving, christian,

> upstanding people and

> it's rather crazy making. I get quite confused

> because to my face that's how

> they are with me but there is always that subtle

> undercurrent that I can't

> put my finger on...I have isolated myself as much as

> I can ever since our

> answering machine picked up the end of a

> conversation my mother-in-law had

> with my husband when she knew I was at work. It was

> an eye opener in scorn

> and manipulation. That was when I realized that

> there were 3 of us in my

> marriage...it gets very draining always trying to

> keep my distance and not

> letting down my guard. I had really been quite

> impressed at how supportive I

> thought they had been to my sis and now I don't know

> what I think. I did

> eventually confront my mother-in-law and told her

> she didn't have to pretend

> to like me any more when it was obvious from how she

> talked about me behind

> my back that she didn't. She responded by saying

> that " just because we don't

> like each other doesn't mean we can't love each

> other. " That seems to be how

> they felt about my sister-in-law. I don't

> understand. My husband is

> definitely not BP and this is just a normal part of

> his family dynamics. He

> honestly believes that his sister never changed and

> was still a bitch to her

> dying day. I am just glad that I know differently

> and that I had the

> privilege of recognizing her for the incredible lady

> that she grew into.She

> really was the family scapegoat and she knew it. She

> told me how she had

> gone to visit her grandfather when he had dimentia

> and she wasn't sure if he

> would know her. Her grandfather did know her, called

> her by name, and told

> her that her parents were wrong about her and then

> he went back into his

> shell. Interesting that whenever she and I were

> together we chose not to

> discuss her family. She did not badmouth them to me.

> That seems rather

> ironic.

>

> --- Original Message ----- From:

>

> To: <ModOasis >

> Sent: Thursday, November 08, 2001 6:21 PM

> Subject: Re: Life events & I wish I could

> trust but I can't

>

>

> >

> >

> > Oh , I'm so sorry! How awful for you and no

> one to talk to. Are you

> > saying that your husband may also be BP?

> > Of course, I'm sure that he's grieving , too, but

> that wasn't very

> supportive of

> > him. I wish I could give you a hug.

> > Go cry and grieve and do what you need to do.

> We'll be here.

> >

> > Ilene

> >

> >

> >

> > To get off the list, send a blank message to

> ModOasis-unsubscribe . Send questions

> & concerns to

> ModOasis-owner . " Stop Waking on

> Eggshells, " a primer for

> non-BPs can be ordered via 1-888-35-SHELL

> (). For the table of

> contents, see http://www.BPDCentral.com

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

-----------------------------------------------------

thanks Kathleen..part of my grief was compounded by the shock of realizing

my sis had died when I knew that she had wanted to be with her children. I'm

grateful that she felt safe with me and saddened that her time of death was

probably hastened by the pending parental visit...but that's how it

was....it was validating to read that your sister made the same choice...the

only person I have shared my suspicions with is my husband...it would be

pointless and cruel to share this with anyone else. The shock is wearing off

and the love remains as a warm fuzzy. I'm grateful to be able to share this

with folks I know will understand.

Re: Life events & I wish I could trust but I can't

> wow ....God Bless you in your grief. Grief is always so hard. I

> think you are correct about people choosing the when of dying.

> My sister died when nada went to the bathroom, waited until

> everyone was out of the room. I can understand that perfectly.

>

> Please be very gentle with yourself, and let the words roll off as

> people can get extremely harsh at death, and when people are

> open wounds, the words can really hurt.

>

> Focus on your friendship with your sis, and what you know was

> real and let the rest roll off into crazy land where it belongs.

>

> hugs,

>

> Kathleen

>

>

>

> To get off the list, send a blank message to

ModOasis-unsubscribe . Send questions & concerns to

ModOasis-owner . " Stop Waking on Eggshells, " a primer for

non-BPs can be ordered via 1-888-35-SHELL (). For the table of

contents, see http://www.BPDCentral.com

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

-----------------------------------------------------

thanks Kathleen..part of my grief was compounded by the shock of realizing

my sis had died when I knew that she had wanted to be with her children. I'm

grateful that she felt safe with me and saddened that her time of death was

probably hastened by the pending parental visit...but that's how it

was....it was validating to read that your sister made the same choice...the

only person I have shared my suspicions with is my husband...it would be

pointless and cruel to share this with anyone else. The shock is wearing off

and the love remains as a warm fuzzy. I'm grateful to be able to share this

with folks I know will understand.

Re: Life events & I wish I could trust but I can't

> wow ....God Bless you in your grief. Grief is always so hard. I

> think you are correct about people choosing the when of dying.

> My sister died when nada went to the bathroom, waited until

> everyone was out of the room. I can understand that perfectly.

>

> Please be very gentle with yourself, and let the words roll off as

> people can get extremely harsh at death, and when people are

> open wounds, the words can really hurt.

>

> Focus on your friendship with your sis, and what you know was

> real and let the rest roll off into crazy land where it belongs.

>

> hugs,

>

> Kathleen

>

>

>

> To get off the list, send a blank message to

ModOasis-unsubscribe . Send questions & concerns to

ModOasis-owner . " Stop Waking on Eggshells, " a primer for

non-BPs can be ordered via 1-888-35-SHELL (). For the table of

contents, see http://www.BPDCentral.com

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I could NEVER tell nada I love her... Blech!

--- southernes@... wrote:

> I once told my mother, I love you but I don't like

> you. I was 13. She will

> bring this up to me on a fairly regular basis to

> this day. It was 30 years

> ago. But now she says that I said I don't love you.

> Every time we go thru

> the same conversation, no, mother, I said I don't

> like you, not I don't love

> you. and so it goes

>

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Interestingly I never did say anything to my mother-in-law to the effect

that I don't like her...quite often I enjoy myself when I'm with her in

spite of having my walls up so high and so hard that they feel

unbreakable...for me, I think it is basically an issue of broken trust and

the ongoing conviction that it will never be safe to trust...I honestly

believe that she means well...a good part of this might be my battle wounds

and low self esteem that leaves me still very fragile and vulnerable.... my

walls are the only emotional safety I've been able to establish when it

comes to dealing with her...if I let them down for a minute I feel like I've

been sucked dry...and always this is without my consent

Re: Life events & I wish I could trust but I can't

> I could NEVER tell nada I love her... Blech!

>

> --- southernes@... wrote:

>

> > I once told my mother, I love you but I don't like

> > you. I was 13. She will

> > bring this up to me on a fairly regular basis to

> > this day. It was 30 years

> > ago. But now she says that I said I don't love you.

> > Every time we go thru

> > the same conversation, no, mother, I said I don't

> > like you, not I don't love

> > you. and so it goes

> >

>

>

> __________________________________________________

>

[Guest guest]

I know what you mean about those walls w/in-laws. I've

had to do this myself. My MIL can be a wonderfully

loving person - then cut you down to pieces behind

your back. She's not to be trusted. But I still love

her more than my own mother because of those times

where she has she has shown me much love. Those times,

now long since past in what's becoming a bitter

heart...

Who knows, if she were my own mother, I might feel

about her as I do my nada... I suppose it goes along

the lines of other people not being able to be

objective about my own plight w/my nada (and the nada

divorce.) That meaning - I can be more objective about

MIL cuz she's not my own mother - the emotional pain

doesn't cut to the core of my being like my own nada

does. (But I can manage her with walls, also not of my

own willing construction.) I'll have to share this

w/SIL next time subject of mothers comes up...

I wonder now if I've been encouraging my SIL to have a

relationship w/her mother when I shouldn't be???

Hmmm... This life of mine gets more interesting every

day...

Thanks for posting that - you've given me some insight

I didn't see before...!

Now pass me the chocolate... (I've already had 4

turtles, mmm)

Cyndie

--- wrote:

> Interestingly I never did say anything to my

> mother-in-law to the effect

> that I don't like her...quite often I enjoy myself

> when I'm with her in

> spite of having my walls up so high and so hard that

> they feel

> unbreakable...for me, I think it is basically an

> issue of broken trust and

> the ongoing conviction that it will never be safe to

> trust...I honestly

> believe that she means well...a good part of this

> might be my battle wounds

> and low self esteem that leaves me still very

> fragile and vulnerable.... my

> walls are the only emotional safety I've been able

> to establish when it

> comes to dealing with her...if I let them down for a

> minute I feel like I've

> been sucked dry...and always this is without my

> consent

> Re: Life events & I wish I could

> trust but I can't

>

>

> > I could NEVER tell nada I love her... Blech!

> >

> > --- southernes@... wrote:

> >

> > > I once told my mother, I love you but I don't

> like

> > > you. I was 13. She will

> > > bring this up to me on a fairly regular basis to

> > > this day. It was 30 years

> > > ago. But now she says that I said I don't love

> you.

> > > Every time we go thru

> > > the same conversation, no, mother, I said I

> don't

> > > like you, not I don't love

> > > you. and so it goes

> > >

> >

> >

> > __________________________________________________

> >

[Guest guest]

> I just read the context of the " Just because we don't

> like each other doesn't mean we can't love each

> other... " It IS twisted thinking!

My nada used to tell me all the time that she " loved " me but that she

didn't like me very much. No wonder I am so messed up.

Hania

[Guest guest]

> I just read the context of the " Just because we don't

> like each other doesn't mean we can't love each

> other... " It IS twisted thinking!

My nada used to tell me all the time that she " loved " me but that she

didn't like me very much. No wonder I am so messed up.

Hania

[Guest guest]

> I just read the context of the " Just because we don't

> like each other doesn't mean we can't love each

> other... " It IS twisted thinking!

My nada used to tell me all the time that she " loved " me but that she

didn't like me very much. No wonder I am so messed up.

Hania

[Guest guest]

Your nada is a monster. Don't believe a word she said.

You're a good kid so go and nurture your wounds and

tell yourself you're a good kid. Hug yourself tonight

and everyday from now on - no matter what you did

wrong or think you did wrong - forgive yourself and

tell yourself that's it's okay. We all make mistakes.

Treat yourself like you treat your children. Would you

incessantly beat your kids up over a mistake - never

like them again - or would you forgive them?

Much of healing my own innerchild has been through the

love that I give to my kids. I give them what I never

had - in that, I've been able to give it to myself. We

deserve to be loved and we deserve to know that we are

loveable to love ourselves.

Hugs,

Cyndie

--- soaringeagle@... wrote:

>

> > I just read the context of the " Just because we

> don't

> > like each other doesn't mean we can't love each

> > other... " It IS twisted thinking!

>

>

> My nada used to tell me all the time that she

> " loved " me but that she

> didn't like me very much. No wonder I am so messed

> up.

> Hania

>

>

>

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Your nada is a monster. Don't believe a word she said.

You're a good kid so go and nurture your wounds and

tell yourself you're a good kid. Hug yourself tonight

and everyday from now on - no matter what you did

wrong or think you did wrong - forgive yourself and

tell yourself that's it's okay. We all make mistakes.

Treat yourself like you treat your children. Would you

incessantly beat your kids up over a mistake - never

like them again - or would you forgive them?

Much of healing my own innerchild has been through the

love that I give to my kids. I give them what I never

had - in that, I've been able to give it to myself. We

deserve to be loved and we deserve to know that we are

loveable to love ourselves.

Hugs,

Cyndie

--- soaringeagle@... wrote:

>

> > I just read the context of the " Just because we

> don't

> > like each other doesn't mean we can't love each

> > other... " It IS twisted thinking!

>

>

> My nada used to tell me all the time that she

> " loved " me but that she

> didn't like me very much. No wonder I am so messed

> up.

> Hania

>

>

>

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

<<My nada used to tell me all the time that she " loved " me but that she

>didn't like me very much. No wonder I am so messed up.

>Hania>>

What a rotten thing to say to a kid!

_________________________________________________________________

Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp

[Guest guest]

<<My nada used to tell me all the time that she " loved " me but that she

>didn't like me very much. No wonder I am so messed up.

>Hania>>

What a rotten thing to say to a kid!

_________________________________________________________________

Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp

[Guest guest]

<<My nada used to tell me all the time that she " loved " me but that she

>didn't like me very much. No wonder I am so messed up.

>Hania>>

What a rotten thing to say to a kid!

_________________________________________________________________

Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

My brother waited for me... He was comatose. He could

not speak any longer. When I arrived he was extrememly

responsive although he still could not speak. My

brother had a message for me... His passing gave me

validation and truth and steered me towards the path

of healing.

I'm so sorry for your grief...

Cyndie

--- wrote:

> odd...but the last half of this post got cut off so

> I'll continue it up

> here.We thought we had another 2 days so sis's son

> went to visit a friend

> and her daughter went out for a break.I had noticed

> that she was sleeping

> peacefully and called my mother-in-law to reassure

> her all was well, hoping

> that would deter her from another visit. Mom replied

> that she was coming so

> I responded by saying that I would see her in a bit.

> Well, sis died right

> there and then.They say that people can chose the

> time of their death and

> that they can hear right up until the end so I can

> only imagine that the

> timing might have been prompted by the phone call.

> And I can't say I blamed

> her because I think I would do the same thing if our

> positions had been

> reversed. Then we had the funeral where my in-laws

> portrayed the devasted,

> grieving parents. I bought the whole picture until

> my husband told me that

> he thought my sis's comment of how she was glad she

> had made peace with her

> parents was a joke. He said this was just another

> example of how she was

> still the same bitch she had always been, that she

> had not done anything to

> make peace because she had never apologized to her

> parents. He said the only

> thing that had changed was that his mom and dad had

> gone to visit her

> because she was dying and they still thought the

> same about her that they

> always had. When I expressed my dismay and that this

> made me wonder if I

> could trust what his parents said and felt about me

> he got mad and told me

> how things were always just about me. Am I nuts

> here?

> Life events & I wish I could

> trust but I can't

>

>

> > I am feeling so sick right now I can't even find

> the right words to

> express it...my sister-in-law died after a brave

> fight with cancer...my

> husband and her other sister never did go to the

> hospital to see her (she

> was the so-called black sheep of the family) but my

> husband gave me his full

> suppport to be at the hospital virtually every day

> for the last few

> weeks...near the end, my sis shared with me how she

> had forgiven her parents

> ( my in-laws) ...I was really impressed at how my

> in-laws had put old

> grievances aside and gone up to visit sis ...I had

> been there as she neared

> the end and their loving concern seemed genuine...I

> also knew that my

> mother-in-law was bound and determined that she was

> going to be there when

> sis died...whether sis wanted her there or not...I

> also knew that the last

> thing sis wanted at her deathbed was her mother...I

> am sure many of you can

> relate...sis wanted just her children and her best

> friend to be

> there...well, the doctor and nurses had indicated

> that we had approx another

> 2 da

> >

> >

> > [Non-text portions of this message have been

> removed]

> >

> >

> > To get off the list, send a blank message to

> ModOasis-unsubscribe . Send questions

> & concerns to

> ModOasis-owner . " Stop Waking on

> Eggshells, " a primer for

> non-BPs can be ordered via 1-888-35-SHELL

> (). For the table of

> contents, see http://www.BPDCentral.com

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

My brother waited for me... He was comatose. He could

not speak any longer. When I arrived he was extrememly

responsive although he still could not speak. My

brother had a message for me... His passing gave me

validation and truth and steered me towards the path

of healing.

I'm so sorry for your grief...

Cyndie

--- wrote:

> odd...but the last half of this post got cut off so

> I'll continue it up

> here.We thought we had another 2 days so sis's son

> went to visit a friend

> and her daughter went out for a break.I had noticed

> that she was sleeping

> peacefully and called my mother-in-law to reassure

> her all was well, hoping

> that would deter her from another visit. Mom replied

> that she was coming so

> I responded by saying that I would see her in a bit.

> Well, sis died right

> there and then.They say that people can chose the

> time of their death and

> that they can hear right up until the end so I can

> only imagine that the

> timing might have been prompted by the phone call.

> And I can't say I blamed

> her because I think I would do the same thing if our

> positions had been

> reversed. Then we had the funeral where my in-laws

> portrayed the devasted,

> grieving parents. I bought the whole picture until

> my husband told me that

> he thought my sis's comment of how she was glad she

> had made peace with her

> parents was a joke. He said this was just another

> example of how she was

> still the same bitch she had always been, that she

> had not done anything to

> make peace because she had never apologized to her

> parents. He said the only

> thing that had changed was that his mom and dad had

> gone to visit her

> because she was dying and they still thought the

> same about her that they

> always had. When I expressed my dismay and that this

> made me wonder if I

> could trust what his parents said and felt about me

> he got mad and told me

> how things were always just about me. Am I nuts

> here?

> Life events & I wish I could

> trust but I can't

>

>

> > I am feeling so sick right now I can't even find

> the right words to

> express it...my sister-in-law died after a brave

> fight with cancer...my

> husband and her other sister never did go to the

> hospital to see her (she

> was the so-called black sheep of the family) but my

> husband gave me his full

> suppport to be at the hospital virtually every day

> for the last few

> weeks...near the end, my sis shared with me how she

> had forgiven her parents

> ( my in-laws) ...I was really impressed at how my

> in-laws had put old

> grievances aside and gone up to visit sis ...I had

> been there as she neared

> the end and their loving concern seemed genuine...I

> also knew that my

> mother-in-law was bound and determined that she was

> going to be there when

> sis died...whether sis wanted her there or not...I

> also knew that the last

> thing sis wanted at her deathbed was her mother...I

> am sure many of you can

> relate...sis wanted just her children and her best

> friend to be

> there...well, the doctor and nurses had indicated

> that we had approx another

> 2 da

> >

> >

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