Guest guest Posted September 3, 2004 Report Share Posted September 3, 2004 Kathy, I've been thinking a lot about this lately, particularly because Emma is so EXTREME in her " gothness " -- white face, heavy eyeshadow, black vertical lines down her cheeks from her eyes and horizontal lines from the corners of her eyes to her hairline. (The face paint is new -- a " transition to high school " thing -- but the all black has been going for 4 to 6 months or so.) I've decided that her look is an outward manifestation of the inner turmoil and depression she's been feeling. But then again, maybe not! I, too, thought it was interesting that so many of the kids in the group have adopted the same look. --Gale Re: Re:Some follow up > Hi Gale, I bet you are exhausted. But you have made great strides over the > past two days! I am so very glad you have found a therapist who thinks she > can help your daughter. I've been there, I know hearing that your child's > symptoms are severe is a kick in the gut...but the initial severity does not > predict how well she'll do or the degree of her recovery. The peer support > group is a major bonus, I'm envious! > > It seems obvious that the first issue the therapist should go after is her > fear of vomiting/fear of medication. Being able to take medication will > help immensely. It is a pure shame that these kids' disorders so frequently > complicate accessing the medication that can help reduce the symptoms. > > The goth thing is interesting. My child is just 10 and has been wanting to > dress in black for a year now. She says she's " goth " , can't explain this to > me though, what it means to her past wearing black. I hadn't thought of > this as having anything to do with her OCD...but now I wonder, if your > daughter and half her OCD support group is also " goth " . Note to self, must > go look up " goth " . :-/ > > Good luck, you are on your way, > Kathy R. in Indiana > > p.s. We went into debt for therapy, paid $140/hour/week out of pocket for > over a year. My daughter's therapist was unfortunately, out of network. No > in-network child therapist would do CBT/ERP (I know, I called every one!!) > so it was worth it to us. I am still battling with the insurance co. to > cover these visits since no one appropriate was within network. Certainly > call the insurance company and plead your case for more covered visits, and > contest every denial of payment, frequently enough ins. cos. will pay the > second time around. Ask the therapist if she is willing to set up a payment > plan for you, some are able and willing. Check out local state-funded > sources that you may qualify for depending on income, etc. Ask the > ex-in-laws for help if necessary! :-) > > ----- Original Message ----- > > > > Well, my daughter and I saw three different people in the last 2 days, and > > we are both physically and emotionally drained . . . > > > > I mentioned in an earlier post that the first was a horrible " interview " > > with an insensitive intake counselor which precipitated a major meltdown. > > The next day, yesterday, we saw a psych dr. whom I liked fairly well, but > my > > daughter didn't like his attitude and the fact that she could hardly > > understand his Indian accent. (I had no problem with that since I'm an > ESL > > teacher.) She couldn't relate to him at all. > > Anyway, he said she has a combination of OCD, anxiety, and depression and > > wants to put her on Zoloft to combat all three at once. She, of course, > > refuses to take anything that lists as a side effect, " nausea and > vomiting. " > > Well, refuses to take anything at all, really (other than an occasional > > Sudafed) -- those icky words just sealed the deal on the Zoloft. I > expected > > that, however, and was really there mostly to get the diagnosis so I could > > start working toward a 504 plan. > > > > Then later that evening, we met the highly-experienced therapist that was > > recommended by the OC Foundation AND a friend whose son (schizophrenia and > > OCD) was helped tremendously by her. She's only about 45 minutes from us. > > We both LOVED her! But I was depressed after she told me that my > > daughter's OCD is quite severe, and that there is LOTS of work to be done. > > She isn't sure how it will go without medication, but said she'd be > willing > > to try. She is the one who is starting the support group for a few of her > > patients -- most are 9th grade girls. She said 6th and 9th grades seem to > > be a peak time for OCD problems to worsen. And she said about half of the > > kids are into the " gothic " look, as is my daughter these days, so my > little > > goth-child already feels like she will fit in. > > > > Now it's more financial woes on top of the illness. That 75 minutes cost > me > > $101.60. I have no idea what the other two appointments will cost, as > they > > are billing my daughter's (through her dad) insurance directly. And most > > will probably NOT be covered, from all I could gather from the company. > I'm > > already in way over my head . . . BUT SHE NEEDS TO GET BETTER, whatever > the > > cost!! I'm about ready to beg the ex-in-laws . . . > > > > --Gale in Illinois (mom to Emma, 14) > > > > > Our list archives, bookmarks, files, and chat feature may be accessed at: http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group// . > Our list advisors are Gail B. , Ed.D., Tamar Chansky, Ph.D., Aureen Pinto Wagner, Ph.D., and Dan Geller, M.D. Our list moderators are Birkhan, Castle, Fowler, Kathy Hammes, Joye, Kathy Mac, Gail Pesses, and Kathy . Subscription issues or suggestions may be addressed to Louis Harkins, list owner, at louisharkins@... , louisharkins@... , louisharkins@... .. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 3, 2004 Report Share Posted September 3, 2004 is into the Goth thing too ... as a mom I say UGH! ... but she is sweet on the inside and I try to limit the amount of black... her hair is now a soft red color ... I many times feel that it is so deep and dark inside of her She writes A-LOT of poetry ... actually award winning poetry and that allows her to express herself and how she feel (the poetry is also very dark). I am hoping (and truly know) that this is a stage ... been about 2 years now tho ... and it will pass Gale wrote:Kathy, I've been thinking a lot about this lately, particularly because Emma is so EXTREME in her " gothness " Peek-A-Boo Playhouse Where childhood is a journey not a race Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 3, 2004 Report Share Posted September 3, 2004 Hi Gale, I have a 'black wearer' or two! My kids tell me that they do not want to follow any particular group or style, but are unique in their interpretation of themselves... ! (ya, right, they invented cool, eh?) My 15yr old daughter wears quite a bit of black, and more eye makeup than I have worn my whole life! She says that most clothing comes in black and its practical for shopping. My infamous Tom is 21 and has worn a blue mohawk for at least 4 years. For extra special family events he will shave his head, quite lovely with his black pants, black shirt, suspenders and black boots! (not). He actually looks quite antogonistic, but anyone who knows him realizes that this is his defense mechanism to keep strangers at bay. He is a very considerate, loving and generous person - when he's not self medicating with drugs or alcohol! btw, he works in a cemetary!! He is also a drummer and poet. He is an anarchist. About paying for treatment, we have 4 people with ocd in our household. I could not find any reasonably priced therapist or medication coverage. I worked 3 jobs to pay for the basic needs. I am a social worker and was fortunatly able to train to do the cbt/erp and turned our life around. If you cannot find a psychologist, look for a social worker, or any other cognitive behaviour therapist (quite popular) and ask if they would agree to attend the Cognitive Behavioural Institute through the OC Foundation and learn how to treat OCD. Best of luck, and don't forget to take care of yourself! wendy, in canada Gale wrote: Kathy, I've been thinking a lot about this lately, particularly because Emma is so EXTREME in her " gothness " -- white face, heavy eyeshadow, black vertical lines down her cheeks from her eyes and horizontal lines from the corners of her eyes to her hairline. (The face paint is new -- a " transition to high school " thing -- but the all black has been going for 4 to 6 months or so.) I've decided that her look is an outward manifestation of the inner turmoil and depression she's been feeling. But then again, maybe not! I, too, thought it was interesting that so many of the kids in the group have adopted the same look. --Gale --------------------------------- Post your free ad now! Yahoo! Canada Personals Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 3, 2004 Report Share Posted September 3, 2004 Hi Gale, I have a 'black wearer' or two! My kids tell me that they do not want to follow any particular group or style, but are unique in their interpretation of themselves... ! (ya, right, they invented cool, eh?) My 15yr old daughter wears quite a bit of black, and more eye makeup than I have worn my whole life! She says that most clothing comes in black and its practical for shopping. My infamous Tom is 21 and has worn a blue mohawk for at least 4 years. For extra special family events he will shave his head, quite lovely with his black pants, black shirt, suspenders and black boots! (not). He actually looks quite antogonistic, but anyone who knows him realizes that this is his defense mechanism to keep strangers at bay. He is a very considerate, loving and generous person - when he's not self medicating with drugs or alcohol! btw, he works in a cemetary!! He is also a drummer and poet. He is an anarchist. About paying for treatment, we have 4 people with ocd in our household. I could not find any reasonably priced therapist or medication coverage. I worked 3 jobs to pay for the basic needs. I am a social worker and was fortunatly able to train to do the cbt/erp and turned our life around. If you cannot find a psychologist, look for a social worker, or any other cognitive behaviour therapist (quite popular) and ask if they would agree to attend the Cognitive Behavioural Institute through the OC Foundation and learn how to treat OCD. Best of luck, and don't forget to take care of yourself! wendy, in canada Gale wrote: Kathy, I've been thinking a lot about this lately, particularly because Emma is so EXTREME in her " gothness " -- white face, heavy eyeshadow, black vertical lines down her cheeks from her eyes and horizontal lines from the corners of her eyes to her hairline. (The face paint is new -- a " transition to high school " thing -- but the all black has been going for 4 to 6 months or so.) I've decided that her look is an outward manifestation of the inner turmoil and depression she's been feeling. But then again, maybe not! I, too, thought it was interesting that so many of the kids in the group have adopted the same look. --Gale --------------------------------- Post your free ad now! Yahoo! Canada Personals Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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