Re: I don't like having A.S. to

[Guest guest]

As a woman of 40 who has never had a boyfriend and only had 1 or 2

dates in my life, I think that marriage or having a life-partner of

some sort is vastly over-rated. I'm not looking for anyone. How many

jillions of people have complained to me about their life partner? How

many jillions of people get divorced? Doesn't that say something about

this inclination to partnering? <sigh> I am a celibate

heterosexual and I am a virgin and proudly so. However, let me tell

you that such a state of sexual existence is viewed as the most bizarre

of all even vilified -- way beyond being gay or a biracial couple or

even bigamy. :-) I

think it's cool. ;-)

Just my 2 cents.

and the zoo.

Kathy wrote:

So, there is somebody out there for you, the

trick is recognizing each other when you finally bump into each other.

[Guest guest]

Thanks for your reply.

I am on SSI disability soon to be SSDI disability. I steer clear of social situations and always have. Other persons minds I cannot fathom.

I knew one aspie online once whom was always talking about finding a girlfriend. I wouldn’t say I am obsessed with it at all and it seems more stressful then could be tolerated. I do not know anything about it and when reading about how to do such things I find myself desiring to avoid it.

I think mostly I am interested in a life-long friend rather then the touching. I have tried finding ladies online with yahoo chat but they are all very complicated. I just try to be myself and it doesn’t seem to work out.I am moving in 8 months instead of 3. The place is much smaller but is near the oceans and red woods. This transition is going to be interesting and I am not sure what it is I will do.

Kathy wrote:

When I worked at the mid-tech level company, there were a few other people there that now looking back on it were probably AS too. Two of the men asked me how my husband and I met because they had not had luck in finding a life-partner. They told me how they didn't like dating or hanging out in social places and didn't think they would ever meet somebody. I told them to look where they already were because there were a couple of women in the same situation right there in the company. We had three different buildings but I would see who all worked there because I was good at picking legal detail in contracts so they had me go over the benefits contracts and summarize for the company handouts and became the benefits coordinator. Both guys ended up marrying in the next year and both their marriages are still together. Don't get hung up on things like age when there is a match. One married a woman 8 years older than he. My

husband is 9 years older than me. Its more important that you are able to communicate with each other and that the two of you can handle the together time and the solitary time that you both in particular need. (I tend to start pushing people away if I haven't had enough of my alone time.)

Sometimes an NT person can get mad because they expect you to 'read their mind' about things like gifts and commenting on clothes and hair, etc.

Do you stay mostly at home or do you go any places? If you go somewhere you are interested in, maybe you can look around to see if there is somebody else that goes there when you do and might share similar interests. You don't really have to go around a lot of people, you just have to notice that one person. Meeting a lot of people that like places you don't is a waste of time. (Of course some people have other opinions so feel free to disagree.)

Kathy J.

Re: I don't like having A.S. to

If I am ever around people often enough perhaps something like that would happen. FAM Secret Society is a community based on respect, friendship, support and acceptance. Everyone is valued.

[Guest guest]

Seems purplexing..When I was around people most they seemed fearful of gay persons. I do not understand at all this problem of self-identity. I studied this condition in psychology briefly and it seems to be everywhere in the world.

I have had one date with a lady (I am male) as I forced myself to do it. I don’t like touching and the other person did so. It took me a while to recover.

chinchillahug wrote:

As a woman of 40 who has never had a boyfriend and only had 1 or 2 dates in my life, I think that marriage or having a life-partner of some sort is vastly over-rated. I'm not looking for anyone. How many jillions of people have complained to me about their life partner? How many jillions of people get divorced? Doesn't that say something about this inclination to partnering? <sigh> I am a celibate heterosexual and I am a virgin and proudly so. However, let me tell you that such a state of sexual existence is viewed as the most bizarre of all even vilified -- way beyond being gay or a biracial couple or even bigamy. :-) I think it's cool. ;-) Just my 2 cents. and the

zoo.Kathy wrote:

So, there is somebody out there for you, the trick is recognizing each other when you finally bump into each other.

[Guest guest]

That is your choice and you are the one who knows what you desire. It sounded like was seeking someone so I answered him in keeping with his request. I don't think being celibate is strange or weird. If my husband were gone, I would not be looking for anyone else. I think that each person needs to decide for themselves what sort of life they would like to make for themselves, keeping in mind what is in your control and what is not.

Kathy J.

Re: I don't like having A.S. to

As a woman of 40 who has never had a boyfriend and only had 1 or 2 dates in my life, I think that marriage or having a life-partner of some sort is vastly over-rated. I'm not looking for anyone. How many jillions of people have complained to me about their life partner? How many jillions of people get divorced? Doesn't that say something about this inclination to partnering? <sigh> I am a celibate heterosexual and I am a virgin and proudly so. However, let me tell you that such a state of sexual existence is viewed as the most bizarre of all even vilified -- way beyond being gay or a biracial couple or even bigamy. :-) I think it's cool. ;-) Just my 2 cents. and the zoo.

[Guest guest]

Thanks for your reply..Kathy wrote:

That is your choice and you are the one who knows what you desire. It sounded like was seeking someone so I answered him in keeping with his request. I don't think being celibate is strange or weird. If my husband were gone, I would not be looking for anyone else. I think that each person needs to decide for themselves what sort of life they would like to make for themselves, keeping in mind what is in your control and what is not.

Kathy J.

Re: I don't like having A.S. to

As a woman of 40 who has never had a boyfriend and only had 1 or 2 dates in my life, I think that marriage or having a life-partner of some sort is vastly over-rated. I'm not looking for anyone. How many jillions of people have complained to me about their life partner? How many jillions of people get divorced? Doesn't that say something about this inclination to partnering? <sigh> I am a celibate heterosexual and I am a virgin and proudly so. However, let me tell you that such a state of sexual existence is viewed as the most bizarre of all even vilified -- way beyond being gay or a biracial couple or even bigamy. :-) I think it's cool. ;-) Just my 2 cents. and the zoo.

[Guest guest]

:

> I think mostly I am interested in a life-long friend rather then the

> touching. I have tried finding ladies online with yahoo chat but they are

> all very complicated. I just try to be myself and it doesn't seem to work

> out.

Perhaps you should try find yourself an Aspie lady? They're usually a bit

less complicated (though Tom may disagree, hehe) and not much for touching

either.

> I am moving in 8 months instead of 3. The place is much smaller but is

> near the oceans and red woods. This transition is going to be interesting

> and I am not sure what it is I will do.

You might find someone there. I hope you will, if that's what you want.

Inger

[Guest guest]

:

> I think mostly I am interested in a life-long friend rather then the

> touching. I have tried finding ladies online with yahoo chat but they are

> all very complicated. I just try to be myself and it doesn't seem to work

> out.

Perhaps you should try find yourself an Aspie lady? They're usually a bit

less complicated (though Tom may disagree, hehe) and not much for touching

either.

> I am moving in 8 months instead of 3. The place is much smaller but is

> near the oceans and red woods. This transition is going to be interesting

> and I am not sure what it is I will do.

You might find someone there. I hope you will, if that's what you want.

Inger

[Guest guest]

:> I think mostly I am interested in a life-long friend rather then the > touching. I have tried finding ladies online with yahoo chat but they are > all very complicated. I just try to be myself and it doesn't seem to work > out.Perhaps you should try find yourself an Aspie lady? They're usually a bit less complicated (though Tom may disagree, hehe) and not much for touching either.

Maybe> I am moving in 8 months instead of 3. The place is much smaller but is > near the oceans and red woods. This transition is going to be interesting > and I am not sure what it is I will do.You might find someone there. I hope you will, if that's what you want.Perhaps

[Guest guest]

Kathy, ,

Yes of course. It is my choice and I don't expect others to come to

the same choices that I did. I think you're right that your response

was more in tune with 's question.

I wasn't responding to or to you really. I'm sorry. I should

have put this in a different thread. It didn't belong here. Please

accept my apologies.

and the zoo.

Kathy wrote:

That is your choice and you are the one who knows

what you desire. It sounded like was seeking someone so I

answered him in keeping with his request. I don't think being celibate

is strange or weird. If my husband were gone, I would not be looking

for anyone else. I think that each person needs to decide for

themselves what sort of life they would like to make for themselves,

keeping in mind what is in your control and what is not.