Re: I am so Mad

[Guest guest]

Sharon,

This kind of thing makes me so mad... it brings out the Mama Bear in me. It is really good that it didn't seem to bother Danny. doesn't seem to really care when other kids don't show him attention and he is usually just happy with the few who come over and try with him. We always joke that is "To Cool To Care" about the kids who just don't get it. I am not looking forward to middle school when the kids can become more obviously cruel but I remember that time (faintly LOL) and kids tend to act worse in large groups, someone starts it and the rest follow along. All I can do is help him feel as good about himself as possible and try to find one or two kids who really get him. Children learn what they see and obviously the parents took the time to make them go to the party but not the next step of teaching them manners and how to behave when you are a guest. I make my kids always say please,thank

you and call all adults by Mr. and Mrs. that's all I can do at this age but it's a start. Kellie

To: AutismBehaviorProblems Sent: Saturday, April 4, 2009 8:01:34 PMSubject: I am so Mad

And in my opinion I have the right to be. Found out at the party that the parents of the kids that did show up with the exception of 2 were told that they had to go to the party. The kids didn't want to be there for Danny they were there strictly because their parents made them.Danny has no true friends - it saddens me greatly. He was oblivious to it all that no one was talking to him, that no one even acknowleded that he was even there at all.When it came to the time for gifts, I asked each of the kids to sit next to him so that I could get pictures of them with their gift for a reminder for Danny - you should of see the faces I got for that one. They did it, but were not happy and sat on the edge of the seat like Danny had cooties.There were only 2 children that actually sat with Dan while they ate and talked with him. For those 2 children there is a place in heaven for them.For the rest of them they can go shoot

basketballs or whatever they will never ever be invited to a party or anything that I do for Dan.It is a cruel cruel world and I just put him and myself in the middle of it.I will never make that mistake again.Sorry to vent, but I am sad and so angry I could just spit.Sharon

[Guest guest]

I am so sorry that that happend to you and your son. I have a fear that Kardyn

will never have real friends. I hate that this world has not opened up their

minds and hearts for these children. They have no idea what they are missing.

Hugs to you both,

a

>

> And in my opinion I have the right to be. Found out at the party that the

parents of the kids that did show up with the exception of 2 were told that they

had to go to the party. The kids didn't want to be there for Danny they were

there strictly because their parents made them.

>

> Danny has no true friends - it saddens me greatly. He was oblivious to it all

that no one was talking to him, that no one even acknowleded that he was even

there at all.

>

> When it came to the time for gifts, I asked each of the kids to sit next to

him so that I could get pictures of them with their gift for a reminder for

Danny - you should of see the faces I got for that one. They did it, but were

not happy and sat on the edge of the seat like Danny had cooties.

>

> There were only 2 children that actually sat with Dan while they ate and

talked with him. For those 2 children there is a place in heaven for them.

>

> For the rest of them they can go shoot basketballs or whatever they will never

ever be invited to a party or anything that I do for Dan.

>

> It is a cruel cruel world and I just put him and myself in the middle of it.

>

> I will never make that mistake again.

>

> Sorry to vent, but I am sad and so angry I could just spit.

>

> Sharon

>

[Guest guest]

I'm sad for Danny...I'm sad for you, as I know how it would make me feel.

e

To: AutismBehaviorProblems Sent: Saturday, April 4, 2009 8:01:34 PMSubject: I am so Mad

..

[Guest guest]

This is beautiful, hopeful...I thank you for this too.

e

To: AutismBehaviorProblems Sent: Saturday, April 4, 2009 8:29:09 PMSubject: Re: I am so Mad

..

[Guest guest]

sharon i responded to you a second ago...just to say I was sorry...it hasn't gone through, so maybe I just pushed the wrong button..hugs to you.

justine

To: AutismBehaviorProblems Sent: Saturday, April 4, 2009 8:01:34 PMSubject: I am so Mad

And in my opinion I have the right to be. Found out at the party that the parents of the kids that did show up with the exception of 2 were told that they had to go to the party. The kids didn't want to be there for Danny they were there strictly because their parents made them.Danny has no true friends - it saddens me greatly. He was oblivious to it all that no one was talking to him, that no one even acknowleded that he was even there at all.When it came to the time for gifts, I asked each of the kids to sit next to him so that I could get pictures of them with their gift for a reminder for Danny - you should of see the faces I got for that one. They did it, but were not happy and sat on the edge of the seat like Danny had cooties.There were only 2 children that actually sat with Dan while they ate and talked with him. For those 2 children there is a place in heaven for them.For the rest of them they can go shoot

basketballs or whatever they will never ever be invited to a party or anything that I do for Dan.It is a cruel cruel world and I just put him and myself in the middle of it.I will never make that mistake again.Sorry to vent, but I am sad and so angry I could just spit.Sharon

[Guest guest]

They all know that Danny has Autism, they have been brainwashed with it since he was in first grade - you could really notice it then. I know the parents, not well, but I know them. They were wrong to send their children that did not want to go.

I wanted to smack almost every kid there that was mean to Dan, but he didn't care he thought all these kids were his friends and he got money and gift cards to spend so what's not to like about that.

It just makes me crazy - people are still afraid that it is catchy and that their precious son or daughter is going to get it - AUTISM is not contagious people.

Subject: Re: I am so MadTo: AutismBehaviorProblems Date: Saturday, April 4, 2009, 8:29 PM

I am so sorry that this happened. Gosh, I was hoping that things would have turned out better. I'm curious, were you friends with the parents before the party? Did they know about Danny's autism? I fear this will happen to Isaiah, even though we had one party so far for him and his sister. (Both were born in the same month, they are 12 months apart). Isaiah is 4, and he has no interest in being around other kids his age. He goes to a special ed preschool right now, but socially speaking, I worry when he enters mainstream school. I almost want to approach the school and do speaking events about autism to help educate the kids when it comes time for Isaiah to enter grade school. Yes, it's a cruel world out there, but we're on the front lines when it comes to challenging and educating the world on autism. Don't lose hope that he'll have true friends. Maybe this will help to weed out those who choose not to understand the meaning of

being a genuine friend.>> And in my opinion I have the right to be. Found out at the party that the parents of the kids that did show up with the exception of 2 were told that they had to go to the party. The kids didn't want to be there for Danny they were there strictly because their parents made them.> > Danny has no true friends - it saddens me greatly. He was oblivious to it all that no one was talking to him, that no one even acknowleded that he was even there at all.> > When it came to the time for gifts, I asked each of the kids to sit next to him so that I could get pictures of them with their gift for a reminder for Danny - you should of see the faces I got for that one. They did it, but were not

happy and sat on the edge of the seat like Danny had cooties.> > There were only 2 children that actually sat with Dan while they ate and talked with him. For those 2 children there is a place in heaven for them.> > For the rest of them they can go shoot basketballs or whatever they will never ever be invited to a party or anything that I do for Dan.> > It is a cruel cruel world and I just put him and myself in the middle of it.> > I will never make that mistake again.> > Sorry to vent, but I am sad and so angry I could just spit.> > Sharon>

[Guest guest]

I'm so sorry this happened, sharon. I totally understand your anger. It's one

thing to discuss with your child special needs and how important it is to

include them (ie, going to the party), it's a totally different thing to force

them and harbor resentment in the kids. That doesn't benefit anyone. It

certainly doesn't help Dan any.

I am so glad that he had 2 dear friends who like him and want to spend time with

him. There are truly some sweet children in this world. Birthdays are such a

special occasion, that it's best spent with those that are close. I hope that

future parties will include these kids and any others that show true friendship

toward your son. But most importantly, make it a very special day for Dan,

whether there's a party or not.

Kiara

>

> And in my opinion I have the right to be. Found out at the party that the

parents of the kids that did show up with the exception of 2 were told that they

had to go to the party. The kids didn't want to be there for Danny they were

there strictly because their parents made them.

>

> Danny has no true friends - it saddens me greatly. He was oblivious to it all

that no one was talking to him, that no one even acknowleded that he was even

there at all.

>

> When it came to the time for gifts, I asked each of the kids to sit next to

him so that I could get pictures of them with their gift for a reminder for

Danny - you should of see the faces I got for that one. They did it, but were

not happy and sat on the edge of the seat like Danny had cooties.

>

> There were only 2 children that actually sat with Dan while they ate and

talked with him. For those 2 children there is a place in heaven for them.

>

> For the rest of them they can go shoot basketballs or whatever they will never

ever be invited to a party or anything that I do for Dan.

>

> It is a cruel cruel world and I just put him and myself in the middle of it.

>

> I will never make that mistake again.

>

> Sorry to vent, but I am sad and so angry I could just spit.

>

> Sharon

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Sharon

My name is Tracey I rarely post but am a member and stop by from time to time..

I wanted to tell you that I totally get what you are saying my little boy Ben

has high functioning autism and ok has some challenging behaviour too... But one

of his 'friends' invited the whole of the class to her party in a bar for a sing

song and the only one not invited was you guessed it Ben... I was really hurt

for him as I would have stayed there with him to keep him on the straight and

narrow. Not sure if it was the parent that didn't want him there but it is

inexcusable. Ben was didn't take any notice he was not hurt but you are right

this world is horrible.

Another thing Ben has two little boys around to play regularly just the two and

because I thought that they were nice to him but I found out they were taking

his stuff playing with his toys but when Ben went to there house they would not

let him join in or play with their stuff. I was so mad especially as these two

boys were apparently nice little boys.

I am sorry for your son and I am not sure how to change it I just hope that he

keeps those two friends he really has.

Take care

Tracey :0)