Guest guest Posted July 28, 2009 Report Share Posted July 28, 2009 well i think i did it again, i misspoke didn't i. not ALL workouts videos and dvds have the skinnies but yeah there are many workout with muscular men and women but there is always a skinny in the group somewhere but not always the 14. ribs poking out just upset me that's too small! if the girls on that show where just chubby like me where ppl say o ur not fat ur just fine. no i'm not but if those girl were my size i dont know that's we'd be having this discussion (which i freaking LOVE this group is so freaking awesome i love u all!)Kassia i guess that's kinda where i have been going with all these posts who are we to judge, even if they are grossly obese who are we to judge. it is wrong of them to put all those burdens and stress on the ppl they love and those who love the obese ones. but it's not our place to judge and be angry that they are on tv. most of them have to know going into this what to expect. they have to know on some level the drama and problem they are going to incounter if they ever watched tv in their lives or stepped foot out their homes. if not they are delusional. OH YES it's gonna be packed full of drama and i foresee alot of fighting betwee the girls. It's not our place to judge. them. i say good for them for having the courage to live in front of the camera in the public eye for as long as they make it. that's all i mean.TrishaTo: exercisevideos Sent: Tuesday, July 28, 2009 5:13:04 PMSubject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love? trish i can seem some videos where you say skinny a$$(i like jari love videos but do not like her ribs sticking at me) but i have some kathy smith back in the day and she was pretty healthy as opposed to an extremely lean self she has now. not sure if you ever looked into amy bento or cathe friedrich. they are lean but i wouldn't call them skinny. especially since they both can out bench me in a heart beat LOL they are full muscular women. ya never see any of them on a reality show either.the only reason i am not crazy about the show is b/c its always drama! if not a dating show then another show its all drama and its not really reality b/c they kind of force the drama(the producers do) and the publicity will really play on "weight". i don't know why it can't be just ppl not skinny,not plus size, not black or white just HUMAN. i would still not like the show anyway b/c i just don't like that kind of show but ppl do get their feelings hurt and TV knows how to play it up without regard to them and this whole premise is the guy likes his women bigger. which is fine good for him but really a show? and since we are on the topic of not getting our space in the sun how about my size. not skinny not plus size falling in the middle we get NO love, as you can tell about my rant about ppl at work. with the bigger women i am a skinny bitch to the skinny girls i am a heffer. doesn't feel to good which is why i try not to judge somebody on weight and wish ppl would see the beauty in all shapes and sizes. we have no representation either. kassia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 28, 2009 Report Share Posted July 28, 2009 i with u laura, i'm in that ur too fat to date i'm 28 yrs old and have been on 3 dates my whole life that's all i heard ur too fat, the 3 dates i have had were with my jeff (starting 10 yrs toget in Nov) i finally found him when i was at my largest. i got lucky there but i have to think what would have happened to me if he hadn't come along would i have lost the weight would i be alone and huge and criticized because of the deep set depression i was in. i can see myself being one of those girls on that show so desparate to be loved that i'd humiliate myself in the eyes of the world for a shot at love that probably isn't real. what about all of u, hwta if it was u up there how would u feel? would u be sad to know ppl were mad and angry and disgusted with u cause u chose not to lose the weight. i would be, i am sad now thinking about it. TrishaTo: exercisevideos Sent: Tuesday, July 28, 2009 5:35:15 PMSubject: Re: OT: More to Love? I agree, this has been a good "hot topic" thread! I am split in two. On one hand I agree with Kassia, our society is overly obsessed with other peoples' weight and maybe this show will in some way glamorize being obese? That said, I am in Judy's "fat and fit" category myself. I'm at 210 right now and not happy with this and taking steps to change this. I was at 170 last year. I teach Turbo Kick and can do a Cathe workout. I have slender friends who are winded and done within 10 minutes! I have been told by men before in tactful and sometimes not-so-tactful ways that they liked me a lot but that I was too fat for them to date. I understand, you like what you like, but it also bums me out that they supposedly like me that much and this is the one thing that stands in the way. What if I was 140 lbs, they got everything they wanted, then I got in a car accident and lost both of my legs? Would they still love me and stick around or would they split? I have also been blessed to have dated men who liked me just the way I was, and what a glorious feeling that is! Men preferring slender women is mostly a North American and European thing, other cultures prefer women with some meat on their bones. In short - thank goodness for those men out there who like heavier women and aren't afraid to defy the North American norm or buy into the size 6 and under craze! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 28, 2009 Report Share Posted July 28, 2009 o of course we aren't saying everyone obese ihas either a physical or mental medical problem ans hell half of them that do could sitl lose some weight and be all around healthier if they just put forth the effort. i am by NO MEANS an expert on anything but failure, pokemon and harry potter. i think kassia and i just want to make sure everyone is aware that there are many reasons for obesety and many cannot control it. i with all of u i had to tell my self the same thing a couple time, "get off ur lazy a$$ and just do it the damn work already" (or shut up!) TrishaTo: exercisevideos Sent: Tuesday, July 28, 2009 8:30:40 PMSubject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love? It isn't just lack of self esteem or mental ability... a lot of times it is just plain LAZINESS!!!! ! They want it off YESTERDAY and aren't WILLING to put the effort in to changing unhealthy habits. It isn't that they aren't able!!! Not most of them anyway. I know from my own experience how incredibly hard it is to change habits but it can be done, if you want it badly enough. I sound so awful for a WW leader but it is so true! I was that way for MANY years too so I know both sides! (It took me over 20 years to figure out that short cuts don't work! Sometimes I'm a slow learner I guess.) I agree with the rest of what you said though, including the fact that the idiot you work with has her own set of problems she's working out with you as her victim. Don't be it, Kassia, you are way healthier and stronger than her, physically, mentally and emotionally! Re: Re: OT: More to Love? i know a few like this and it stems further then just weight.its self esteem and lack of mental ability to do so,so their pattern is to make fun of others in some way or try to find a weak spot. whose to say where it started but they choose in some way to continue the pattern.obviously these women must be proud of themselves to have the confidence to be on tv and that is great but my issue is all these shows with average women or size 2 gals, always exploit drama and this one i am afraid will go for the social jugular with the weight and what ppl think of them and their weight and judge them for weight and looks. some of them look very pretty and seem so sweet. like i say before i have a bit of a belly bulge and it bothers me i am trying to work on it,but i have one bitch at work that will just point out and be negative like this little bulge defines who i am. there is more to me then a little stomach. there are just as many ppl like the evil woman i work with(whom is naturally thin good for her but eats like crap and parties like she is 20 again but won't come weight lift with me hhhmm) who will be willinging to define you to other based on how you look and its almost that repeat pattern again of ppl judging you. even working out they expect me to be thin like pari hilton or something when i am looking for strength and ability. overall its a media frenzy of looks! well i don't seem ppl on this group on any magazine covers and they are more of an inspiration and more beautiful then celebs and reality 15 min of fame stars. but not everybody would appreciate the beauty of each of us b/c they are so wrapped up in working out for looks then they are about health and strength and i blame a lot of tv for that. kassia fitness blogSpecial Needs Scouting I just lose all patience with people who whine about their obesity or poor health even though they have made the choices that made them that way.--- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 28, 2009 Report Share Posted July 28, 2009 that's what i'm doing just paying better attention to what i am eating by journaling it all. the last three days i have literally cut my food intake in half and i feel better. TrishaTo: exercisevideos Sent: Tuesday, July 28, 2009 8:38:09 PMSubject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love? I agree too, that there are some people who are psychologically held back from losing weight. I honestly believe that most obese people should do some kind of counseling to heal old wounds that they try to take care of with food. That isn't a WW philosophy though, just my own observation. Sounds like your DH is doing GREAT, Donna! I don't think you have to be "super fit" or even a super great eater to be healthy, which is what I took away from Judy's comments. I love WW because it teaches moderation.. . exercising in moderation and not trying to cut yourself off from not so helpful treats so that you can live in the real world and enjoy it too, even more so as a healthy person. Your DH is doing what everyone should do. You don't have to spend money on WW even, just use common sense about food & exercise and pay attention to your body's hunger signals. (Easier said than done, for me too though often enough!) Re: OT: More to Love?To: exercisevideos@ yahoogroups. comDate: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 2:31 PM Thanks, everybody. Donna, I'll even go a little further than you did. I think it is fair to make a judgment about people who won't lose weight. (Not those who for medical reasons CAN'T but those who just WON'T.) It does say something about you and what you think of the people who love you if you're not willing to make your own health a priority. I'm all in favor of supporting those who want to improve themselves. I just lose all patience with people who whine about their obesity or poor health even though they have made the choices that made them that way.> >> > oh yeah kitchen nightmares. it was originally a BBC thing he did in britian then brought over here. tell ya the american version MADE tv b/c of how more embarrassing the ppl in america acted over britian. > > > > donna i have to agree we are over bombarded with images of perfection and beauty. while its nice to play dress and be glamorous there is almost no looking at the other side of things and if some magazines do its with such negativity that its hard to see ourselves as "pretty" when celebs with the same "flaws" with get chastize for it in a magazine. > > > > i read one standing line one day about katherine heigel and her "saggy butt". she didn't really have a saggy butt but she is like a kettlebell queen like darcy and i so i took a little offense that this thin woman who can hoist heavy bells with the best of can't be given a positive spin. okay she is not perfect but she is a strong lady to take on such a tough routine from a tough trainer! they sure as heck don't say that! > > > > i have a bit of belly buldge that hates to go away the older i get. its hard to say gosh i am strong i workout hard when i have the body of britney when everybody called her fat.shoot i would have like to have been britney fat LOL she was still in better shape then my abs look now. i have serious self esteem issues b/c i was raised by somebody in the same fashion. never looking on the bright side or the positives or even praising when it was good time too. just always negative negative could be better etc. there are millions like me too! like i said i won't blame media on ALL of it but they have their hands in a big chunk of it. > > > > i give a shout out to all my curvy girls though b/c real men love curves and a woman who isn't afraid to order more then just a light salad on a date. > > > > kassia> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 28, 2009 Report Share Posted July 28, 2009 I just really HATE when people judge people by their looks. You don't know what the person is going through but people like make value judgments that because this/that woman is over-weight or obese she must be lazy and eat crap all day long. Well, I'm considered obese and I am working towards changing that. Do you think that I sit home all day long on this stupid computer? Do you ever read my posts, some of you do but maybe not. It would have been very easy for me to throw in the towel when I started having foot problems but I didn't. I did water exercises and swam in my pool. I play 4 vs. 4 sand volleyball. How many over-weight/obese people play that?...very few but I'm not going to let any stupid judgmental person stop me from doing something I LOVE to do! I'm not the best volleyball player but I'm pretty good for someone who is only 5' and has a bad knee and a bad foot! I bet a lot of those skinny-ass girls wouldn't go all out and dive in the sand like I do! Obesity is a disease and I really wish people would start caring about people and offer support rather than judging and making fun of them behind their backs! People should still be supportive of obese people that aren't trying to lose weight..they should lead by example and not make snide remarks like Kassia's co-worker. I do hate this show though because it's not going to be supportive for these women it's just going to have the skinny witches and shallow men laughing their asses off while they lounge on their sofas drinking beer/wine.That's all I have to say about this topic. Jenp.s. , I think EVERYONE deserves to have a lover/companion in their life whether or not they are a size 24 or a size 2. I just lose all patience with people who whine about their obesity or poor health even though they have made the choices that made them that way.--- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2009 Report Share Posted July 29, 2009 i hate these show in general jen but this one isn't making feel comfortable for THIS reason. giving so called "fitter" ppl fuel for their fire. as mentioned though many "fit" ppl that will judge ppl that are a little softer or curvier are not exactly healthy themselves. co worker in point. parties and drinks like she is 20 and i know she has to be at least 40 each powder mashed potatoes on a daily basis NEVER a vegetable on her plate. but then again if its not this topic then its another topic(she once said i was a fool to trust my husband that he wouldn't cheat b/c that is how men and women act at the club he works at). it doesn't make it hurt any less when i consider the source b/c all i hear is the same thing "your fat your belly is disgusting you need to do this or that". and even if i a try to break the tape in my head it still lays there and i feel bad. these are the type of ppl that i deal with. now at the YMCA we have all different shapes and sizes and everybody is so friendly and nice. employees and trainers talke to EVERYBODY. its the first time i have ever felt comfortable in the gym. i have had a few compliments and questions about exercises and stretches i do. an older woman was impressed with my flexible yoga stretching while a big muscular guy was asking me about specefic ones and even said he had to try some of those. women have asked about my treadmill workouts and every last one of them were sweet and never once asked about "weight loss" or calories burned. they just want a great workout and it looked fun to them many of our fellow members are marathon runners or play other sports as a hobby so to them,like me, its function and health. at the end of the day even when i was more tight and toned i was always a size 12(even in the older pics posted in my group photo album) after i lost 40lbs. so this whole size 14-16 thing is just a number and it seems to be their focus of the show. a stupid number! kassia fitness blogSpecial Needs Scouting I do hate this show though because it's not going to be supportive for these women it's just going to have the skinny witches and shallow men laughing their asses off while they lounge on their sofas drinking beer/wine.That's all I have to say about this topic. Jenp.s. , I think EVERYONE deserves to have a lover/companion in their life whether or not they are a size 24 or a size 2. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2009 Report Share Posted July 29, 2009 i am with denise!!! every small change you made for the better is a HUGE milestone in a lifestyle change for health! when i started i couldn't even do 12 min of denise austin's workout show and now i use her on my lighter workout days! it took nearly 10 years from where i was to where i am now and still have some more to go. its not failure its progress. kassia fitness blogSpecial Needs Scouting Trish you are doing fantastic. Look back at the last week and how many HUGE improvements you have made. You should feel really proud. Don't say you are a failure. You are still doing it:-) Keep up the wonderful strides!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2009 Report Share Posted July 29, 2009 Donna,oh absolutely i agree, as i said i am a jealous person. and most of it stems from the fact they are more dedicated, have the focus i wish i had, and have discipline i don't, but i don't like to pick on or criticize people or judge on how they look, i was that fat poor kid no one wanted to talk to or play with. i spend more of my school years alone then with friends, but i think that's what caused my jealousy issues, at least partly. give me time and i'll figure out what else causes it for me. i'm not making excuses just analyzing myself! i do that ALOT! TrishaTo: exercisevideos Sent: Wednesday, July 29, 2009 6:58:08 AMSubject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love? Chiming in on the jealousy issue - jealousy is often the "spark" behind negative comments people make about each other. Case in point, I have a co-worker who is extremely fit and in great shape - yet, people make comments about her "having an eating disorder" b/c she doesn't partake in the office snacks and watches her diet - she brings her meals in every day, she is a big salad/fish eater. They even started a rumor that when she was on an extended vacation that she was really at an eating disorder clinic! This woman is fit - she is muscular - and she watches what she eats. The people who made those comments are, I think, just jealous b/c they don't have the discipline to do what she does. Donna From: snowlily1960@ aol.com <snowlily1960@ aol.com>Subject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love?To: exercisevideos@ yahoogroups. comDate: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 7:27 PM Kassia I am sorry you have a co worker that is so insensitive to say things like that to you. I don't understand people who feel like they have to give you their two cents worth, when you didn't even ask. Some people I know that weigh more than me like to call me 'frail' because I am thinner than them. With the weights I work out with I KNOW I am not frail:-) But it used to bother me a lot, that they would say that. I think jealousy has so much to do with the comments. I am guessing your co worker is jealous of your dedication to working out and wishes she had that kind of staying power, saying things to you in some way makes her feel better. I am sorry. A Good Credit Score is 700 or Above. See yours in just 2 easy steps! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2009 Report Share Posted July 29, 2009 i won't watch any more either paul. it was just sad, i can agree that they all were wanting pitty and had the poor me attitude which i hate but it seems, like u said, they like it. they like food they like being big and that's ok with me. if that's what make them happy then who am i to say anything about them at all. it's their choice and they have to live with it. TrishaTo: exercisevideos Sent: Wednesday, July 29, 2009 7:58:35 AMSubject: Re: OT: More to Love? Well, now that I saw the show, here's my take on "More to Love." I wanted to throw up. I expected to hear testimonials from these women about why they couldn't lose weight. I was surprised that none of them played the "medical reasons" card. So we don't know for sure why they have weight issues, but their incessant whining about never having dates along with the fact that they didn't claim circumstances beyond their control suggests to me that most of those women are like the rest of America--too darned lazy to put down the Twinkies and get off the couch. The guy was pathetic too. At over 300lbs he's happy the way he is and he admits he just loves food?? Ugh. He's lucky to be alive. And this show isn't going to help him or whichever lady he ends up with. It will just confirm them both in their complacency about their health. It is true that our society judges people unfairly on the basis of looks. You might notice that most couples fall into the same general level of physical attractiveness. And I knew a long time ago I'm no Tom Cruise or whoever the ladies' favorite is nowadays. (You can see my pics in the photo section.) Now, I'm not the superficial kind of guy who obsesses over a woman's looks. I have met some women in my life who were definitely plus-sizes but whom I nevertheless felt an attraction to. (Hey, , I wouldn't cross you off my list just because of some extra pounds, heehee.) I also noticed one or two women on the show last night who I thought were kind of attractive at least on a physical level. But the whining and lack of responsibility from these women makes me think I was right about the show--it's just going to make people feel comfortable with their unhealthy choices while they accuse the rest of us (especially us men) of being shallow. Well, that's what I got out of the show. I don't think I'll keep watching. What did the rest of you think? > > , > > Any idiot that would tell you that you aren't thin enough for him to love ain't worth loving! > > > > > Re: OT: More to Love? > > > I agree, this has been a good "hot topic" thread! > > I am split in two. On one hand I agree with Kassia, our society is overly obsessed with other peoples' weight and maybe this show will in some way glamorize being obese? > > That said, I am in Judy's "fat and fit" category myself. I'm at 210 right now and not happy with this and taking steps to change this. I was at 170 last year. I teach Turbo Kick and can do a Cathe workout. I have slender friends who are winded and done within 10 minutes! > > I have been told by men before in tactful and sometimes not-so-tactful ways that they liked me a lot but that I was too fat for them to date. I understand, you like what you like, but it also bums me out that they supposedly like me that much and this is the one thing that stands in the way. What if I was 140 lbs, they got everything they wanted, then I got in a car accident and lost both of my legs? Would they still love me and stick around or would they split? > > I have also been blessed to have dated men who liked me just the way I was, and what a glorious feeling that is! Men preferring slender women is mostly a North American and European thing, other cultures prefer women with some meat on their bones. > > In short - thank goodness for those men out there who like heavier women and aren't afraid to defy the North American norm or buy into the size 6 and under craze! > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2009 Report Share Posted July 29, 2009 There are many reasons for obesity and most of the time people CAN control it but choose not to. They choose to pity themselves, blame everyone else (including their parents) and not take personal responsibility. In most cases, but not all, it is cop-out. It isn't a matter of calling yourself names and telling yourself to do it. That NEVER helps. It is a matter of caring enough about yourself and the people you love to actually take responsibility and make the changes necessary to be healthy. Definitely not easy and for some people it is much, much harder but it is also definitely not impossible. Re: Re: OT: More to Love? i know a few like this and it stems further then just weight.its self esteem and lack of mental ability to do so,so their pattern is to make fun of others in some way or try to find a weak spot. whose to say where it started but they choose in some way to continue the pattern.obviously these women must be proud of themselves to have the confidence to be on tv and that is great but my issue is all these shows with average women or size 2 gals, always exploit drama and this one i am afraid will go for the social jugular with the weight and what ppl think of them and their weight and judge them for weight and looks. some of them look very pretty and seem so sweet. like i say before i have a bit of a belly bulge and it bothers me i am trying to work on it,but i have one bitch at work that will just point out and be negative like this little bulge defines who i am. there is more to me then a little stomach. there are just as many ppl like the evil woman i work with(whom is naturally thin good for her but eats like crap and parties like she is 20 again but won't come weight lift with me hhhmm) who will be willinging to define you to other based on how you look and its almost that repeat pattern again of ppl judging you. even working out they expect me to be thin like pari hilton or something when i am looking for strength and ability. overall its a media frenzy of looks! well i don't seem ppl on this group on any magazine covers and they are more of an inspiration and more beautiful then celebs and reality 15 min of fame stars. but not everybody would appreciate the beauty of each of us b/c they are so wrapped up in working out for looks then they are about health and strength and i blame a lot of tv for that. kassia fitness blogSpecial Needs Scouting I just lose all patience with people who whine about their obesity or poor health even though they have made the choices that made them that way.--- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2009 Report Share Posted July 29, 2009 u've gotta point nancy and i agree but i know these two women that are extremely large women have been for as long as i've known them. they whine they can't find clothes, they whine they are lonely, don't have any enegery, can't do this job, task or w\e. and when we (friends nd family) say if u'd just lose 20 lbs then u could (yes they need to lose more then 20 lbs but it's a start). through out all of this they still believe that there are other reasons for their problems it's can't be the weigh cause they've ALWAYS been that big. they aren't making the connection that they are unhappy cause they are obese. in today's society the human race is oblivious. "i smoke 6 packs of cigerattes a day but i don't know why i can't breath, i just cleaned black mold with bleach i don't know why we're so sick. i get four hours of sleep a night i don't know why i'm so tired, i just ate long john silvers and a gallon of ice cream i don't know why i'm over weight" ppl r stupid. and i don't use that word refering to ppl lightly. it's unkind but i fall in that catagories to stupid. TrishaTo: exercisevideos Sent: Wednesday, July 29, 2009 2:14:55 PMSubject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love? How happy can they be if they're whining about no one dating them and they're on a show like that???? Re: OT: More to Love?> > > I agree, this has been a good "hot topic" thread!> > I am split in two. On one hand I agree with Kassia, our society is overly obsessed with other peoples' weight and maybe this show will in some way glamorize being obese? > > That said, I am in Judy's "fat and fit" category myself. I'm at 210 right now and not happy with this and taking steps to change this. I was at 170 last year. I teach Turbo Kick and can do a Cathe workout. I have slender friends who are winded and done within 10 minutes!> > I have been told by men before in tactful and sometimes not-so-tactful ways that they liked me a lot but that I was too fat for them to date. I understand, you like what you like, but it also bums me out that they supposedly like me that much and this is the one thing that stands in the way. What if I was 140 lbs, they got everything they wanted, then I got in a car accident and lost both of my legs? Would they still love me and stick around or would they split?> > I have also been blessed to have dated men who liked me just the way I was, and what a glorious feeling that is! Men preferring slender women is mostly a North American and European thing, other cultures prefer women with some meat on their bones. > > In short - thank goodness for those men out there who like heavier women and aren't afraid to defy the North American norm or buy into the size 6 and under craze!> > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2009 Report Share Posted July 29, 2009 Nothing feels better when you do a workout that USED to be hard and it just doesn't push you any more. These are accomplishments no one can take away from you. I LOVE it:-) Hot Deals at Dell on Popular Laptops perfect for Back to School Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2009 Report Share Posted July 29, 2009 I think everyone is afraid that they can't get to their goal and, if they actually can, then they worry that they won't be able to maintain it. For me, my key has been the support network of the WW meetings and the accountability at the scale with another person weighing me, that and knowing absolutely what I want... a healthy me. Figure out what you really want. What will keep you from eating the whole bag of cookies? What will drive you to make uncomfortable (at first) choices that will lead to better health and more comfort with your own self? No need to post that of course, just that if you have a very vivid picture of what you really want it makes it easier to stay motivated when times are tough. Re: Re: OT: More to Love?To: exercisevideos@ yahoogroups. comDate: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 7:27 PM Kassia I am sorry you have a co worker that is so insensitive to say things like that to you. I don't understand people who feel like they have to give you their two cents worth, when you didn't even ask. Some people I know that weigh more than me like to call me 'frail' because I am thinner than them. With the weights I work out with I KNOW I am not frail:-) But it used to bother me a lot, that they would say that. I think jealousy has so much to do with the comments. I am guessing your co worker is jealous of your dedication to working out and wishes she had that kind of staying power, saying things to you in some way makes her feel better. I am sorry. A Good Credit Score is 700 or Above. See yours in just 2 easy steps! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2009 Report Share Posted July 29, 2009 :-) Thank you SO much, Judy!! I really needed this today, thank you!!! Re: OT: More to Love?To: exercisevideos@ yahoogroups. comDate: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 2:31 PM Thanks, everybody. Donna, I'll even go a little further than you did. I think it is fair to make a judgment about people who won't lose weight. (Not those who for medical reasons CAN'T but those who just WON'T.) It does say something about you and what you think of the people who love you if you're not willing to make your own health a priority. I'm all in favor of supporting those who want to improve themselves. I just lose all patience with people who whine about their obesity or poor health even though they have made the choices that made them that way.> >> > oh yeah kitchen nightmares. it was originally a BBC thing he did in britian then brought over here. tell ya the american version MADE tv b/c of how more embarrassing the ppl in america acted over britian. > > > > donna i have to agree we are over bombarded with images of perfection and beauty. while its nice to play dress and be glamorous there is almost no looking at the other side of things and if some magazines do its with such negativity that its hard to see ourselves as "pretty" when celebs with the same "flaws" with get chastize for it in a magazine. > > > > i read one standing line one day about katherine heigel and her "saggy butt". she didn't really have a saggy butt but she is like a kettlebell queen like darcy and i so i took a little offense that this thin woman who can hoist heavy bells with the best of can't be given a positive spin. okay she is not perfect but she is a strong lady to take on such a tough routine from a tough trainer! they sure as heck don't say that! > > > > i have a bit of belly buldge that hates to go away the older i get. its hard to say gosh i am strong i workout hard when i have the body of britney when everybody called her fat.shoot i would have like to have been britney fat LOL she was still in better shape then my abs look now. i have serious self esteem issues b/c i was raised by somebody in the same fashion. never looking on the bright side or the positives or even praising when it was good time too. just always negative negative could be better etc. there are millions like me too! like i said i won't blame media on ALL of it but they have their hands in a big chunk of it. > > > > i give a shout out to all my curvy girls though b/c real men love curves and a woman who isn't afraid to order more then just a light salad on a date. > > > > kassia> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2009 Report Share Posted July 29, 2009 It is a shame these people can't be inspired rather than being jealous. That is such a waste of energy. I enjoy doing dvd's where the women are extremely fit, because that inspires me to keep at it and set more goals. Especially as I get older and see women older than me that are really fit it gives me something to shoot for. Hot Deals at Dell on Popular Laptops perfect for Back to School Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2009 Report Share Posted July 29, 2009 Tell us what you really thought of it, !! ;-) Re: OT: More to Love?> > > I agree, this has been a good "hot topic" thread!> > I am split in two. On one hand I agree with Kassia, our society is overly obsessed with other peoples' weight and maybe this show will in some way glamorize being obese? > > That said, I am in Judy's "fat and fit" category myself. I'm at 210 right now and not happy with this and taking steps to change this. I was at 170 last year. I teach Turbo Kick and can do a Cathe workout. I have slender friends who are winded and done within 10 minutes!> > I have been told by men before in tactful and sometimes not-so-tactful ways that they liked me a lot but that I was too fat for them to date. I understand, you like what you like, but it also bums me out that they supposedly like me that much and this is the one thing that stands in the way. What if I was 140 lbs, they got everything they wanted, then I got in a car accident and lost both of my legs? Would they still love me and stick around or would they split?> > I have also been blessed to have dated men who liked me just the way I was, and what a glorious feeling that is! Men preferring slender women is mostly a North American and European thing, other cultures prefer women with some meat on their bones. > > In short - thank goodness for those men out there who like heavier women and aren't afraid to defy the North American norm or buy into the size 6 and under craze!> > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 30, 2009 Report Share Posted July 30, 2009 Definitely!!!!! That is so fun!!!!! Re: Re: OT: More to Love? Nothing feels better when you do a workout that USED to be hard and it just doesn't push you any more. These are accomplishments no one can take away from you. I LOVE it:-) Hot Deals at Dell on Popular Laptops perfect for Back to School Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 30, 2009 Report Share Posted July 30, 2009 - My mom does this to me all the time and it drives me crazy. She will make comments like "she looks frail like you," or our neighbor is "way too skinny, she looks like you do" Lately it has been muscular arm comments that are very negative. It bothered me a lot more a few years back. She can't just be happy for me because I take care of myself. She is very overweight and has been for a very long time. Now I listen to my doctors and my husband:-) They think I am at a great weight. But I realized one day what matters most is am I comfortable, and I am. We REALLY do have to consider the source when someone starts to insult our body in ANY way. I mean really what normal person would do that? Hot Deals at Dell on Popular Laptops perfect for Back to School Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 30, 2009 Report Share Posted July 30, 2009 Fantastic for you for getting to the realization you have, & great point too (your last one)! I'm going to have to remember that one to share with my members! Re: Re: OT: More to Love? - My mom does this to me all the time and it drives me crazy. She will make comments like "she looks frail like you," or our neighbor is "way too skinny, she looks like you do" Lately it has been muscular arm comments that are very negative. It bothered me a lot more a few years back. She can't just be happy for me because I take care of myself. She is very overweight and has been for a very long time. Now I listen to my doctors and my husband:-) They think I am at a great weight. But I realized one day what matters most is am I comfortable, and I am. We REALLY do have to consider the source when someone starts to insult our body in ANY way. I mean really what normal person would do that? Hot Deals at Dell on Popular Laptops perfect for Back to School Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 30, 2009 Report Share Posted July 30, 2009 Trish I couldn't agree with you more. So much of it is learned behavior. My mom's family is a VERY interesting bunch:-) and yes, she really was demeaned quite a bit by her mom. I saw a lot of it even when she was an adult and I was growing up. It never stopped. Her mother was a very jealous person and couldn't be happy for her daughters for any of their accomplishments. Although it has been difficult. I have finally gotten to a place where I realize it is a waste of my energy to get mad at someone's comments, so now I more often just feel bad for them that they are so miserable that they feel they have to try to tear others down that way. It took me A WHILE and some therapy to get to this point though:-) Now I know that when someone is really on you about something like your looks, intelligence, background, education, whatever, THAT is the area THEY are most insecure with. That has helped me a lot too. You brought up some really good points. I think it is great you took the time to talk to the kids too and get behind what was causing the behavior! An Excellent Credit Score is 750. See Yours in Just 2 Easy Steps! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 30, 2009 Report Share Posted July 30, 2009 i can agree with that , what normal person does that?i have said many times i analyze everything to death. people are my main focus, i am a teacher at our local elementary i work in a cross category classroom with 5-20 students ages 5-12 it varies year to year of course. I have learned by simply watching those around my students that their bad behavior is excused because they are handicapped in one way or another. that's wrong to me, for many, many, many reasons (and if u want to know why i feel this way ask and i will tell u elsewhere trying to keep this short, i know lol this is trisha we're talking about short is impossible). the students were not stopping the bad sometimes outright cruel behavior because they were not being punished and my suprior were against me taking matters into my own hands, but i did anyway, (risky i know we'll see how risky when\if i get called back this year!) i didn't take playtime away send them to the corner or make them write lines. my method was to talk to them. i quickly learned with the few visits with parents and these talks with my students that their bad behavior was learned. i then turned this find to adults and their parents and i found the same even in myself. many of the ways i handle things in life are learned from my parents, babysitters, close relatives, and friends. my mom is an emotional eater that where that came from, my dad will lay a guilt trip on u like no other and u'll feel so low u no longer exist when he's done. i do the guilty trip thing but not as bad b\c i think of my dad and what he does and stop myself cuz i hate it!!! learned behaviours are any behaviour we encounter on a regular basis. like getting a brittish accent after a months visit. ur mom was probably critcized her throughout her life, now she unconsciencly does the same to you. of corse i am not saying oh ur gramma did it to her thats y. no i am saying it's possible and when we can consciously see these ill learned behaviours u can change them and avoid doing the same to ur own children, family and friends. most of the time it's not as bad as criticizing its little things but the little ill behaviors hurt too. TrishaTo: exercisevideos Sent: Thursday, July 30, 2009 5:47:56 PMSubject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love? - My mom does this to me all the time and it drives me crazy. She will make comments like "she looks frail like you," or our neighbor is "way too skinny, she looks like you do" Lately it has been muscular arm comments that are very negative. It bothered me a lot more a few years back. She can't just be happy for me because I take care of myself. She is very overweight and has been for a very long time. Now I listen to my doctors and my husband:-) They think I am at a great weight. But I realized one day what matters most is am I comfortable, and I am. We REALLY do have to consider the source when someone starts to insult our body in ANY way. I mean really what normal person would do that? Hot Deals at Dell on Popular Laptops perfect for Back to School Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 31, 2009 Report Share Posted July 31, 2009 Kids are awesome, i love my job and what i do, i hate waking up early and i dread it when the last two weeks of vacation lumber ahead but i still love what i do. i am always saying listen to what they are telling u. let them tell crazy stories, and make up things. ask them about their day and listen to what they have to say, look at their faces and you'll see their whole day unravel before ur eyes it's magic. kids are not bad in general. they are not born bad, they are taught wrong. there is no such thing as a bad seed. only bad gardners that plant weed next to their roses. i just want to help and thats the best way i know how. TrishaTo: exercisevideos Sent: Friday, July 31, 2009 12:49:47 AMSubject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love? Trish I couldn't agree with you more. So much of it is learned behavior. My mom's family is a VERY interesting bunch:-) and yes, she really was demeaned quite a bit by her mom. I saw a lot of it even when she was an adult and I was growing up. It never stopped. Her mother was a very jealous person and couldn't be happy for her daughters for any of their accomplishments. Although it has been difficult. I have finally gotten to a place where I realize it is a waste of my energy to get mad at someone's comments, so now I more often just feel bad for them that they are so miserable that they feel they have to try to tear others down that way. It took me A WHILE and some therapy to get to this point though:-) Now I know that when someone is really on you about something like your looks, intelligence, background, education, whatever, THAT is the area THEY are most insecure with. That has helped me a lot too. You brought up some really good points. I think it is great you took the time to talk to the kids too and get behind what was causing the behavior! An Excellent Credit Score is 750. See Yours in Just 2 Easy Steps! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 31, 2009 Report Share Posted July 31, 2009 Excellent points, !! Oh, Trish - I loved your post about children!Donna Subject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love?To: exercisevideos Date: Friday, July 31, 2009, 1:49 AM Trish I couldn't agree with you more. So much of it is learned behavior. My mom's family is a VERY interesting bunch:-) and yes, she really was demeaned quite a bit by her mom. I saw a lot of it even when she was an adult and I was growing up. It never stopped. Her mother was a very jealous person and couldn't be happy for her daughters for any of their accomplishments. Although it has been difficult. I have finally gotten to a place where I realize it is a waste of my energy to get mad at someone's comments, so now I more often just feel bad for them that they are so miserable that they feel they have to try to tear others down that way. It took me A WHILE and some therapy to get to this point though:-) Now I know that when someone is really on you about something like your looks, intelligence, background, education, whatever, THAT is the area THEY are most insecure with. That has helped me a lot too. You brought up some really good points. I think it is great you took the time to talk to the kids too and get behind what was causing the behavior! An Excellent Credit Score is 750. See Yours in Just 2 Easy Steps! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.