Re: Re: OT: More to Love?

July 28, 2009

Hi,

I don't know anything about this show - but I don't watch much TV so I doubt I will. Kassia raised a good point about the media and body image though - I was so shocked by this - and I was meaning to post about it - but just haven't had the time, but now since we're talking about it, I will!The other day my DD told me she didn't like the way she looked - now she is 6 (or will be on Sunday!) I didn't think this stuff happened quite so soon. When I was 6 I'm not even sure I considered how I looked. So, I questioned her a bit about it and she told me that she didn't like her hair b/c it doesn't lay flat (she has very fine blonde hair, so it is prone to fly-aways!) - so I told her no one's hair lays perfectly flat and then she told me that she saw a picture in a magazine and there was a lady in the magazine whose hair laid flat. So, we discussed that to get the lady's hair to look like that probably took several

hours, a stylist, a blow-drier, and lots of styling product plus some touching up on the photo to eliminate any fly-aways ad make the model look "perfect" - I stressed to her that magazine pictures are not "real" they are the product of hours of work and then touching up the photos after the fact. Hopefully my talk did some good. It is amazing though how early this stuff starts with the kids - and the girls especially. I'm really glad that we don't watch a whole lot of TV and the stuff she watches is still PBS-animal shows.

My mother was very self-critical about her looks and everything else about herself and it took me a long time to get over that in myself. Now, I'm pretty happy with the way I look. I don't look like model, I'm not without imperfections - but who cares??

Kassia - I like Hell's Kitchen, too and the other one he did where he visited the restaurants....what was the name of that one? It was pretty funny, sometimes gross, and certainly made me wonder about some of the places where i may have eaten!Take care,

Donna

July 28, 2009

oh yeah kitchen nightmares. it was originally a BBC thing he did in britian then brought over here. tell ya the american version MADE tv b/c of how more embarrassing the ppl in america acted over britian. donna i have to agree we are over bombarded with images of perfection and beauty. while its nice to play dress and be glamorous there is almost no looking at the other side of things and if some magazines do its with such negativity that its hard to see ourselves as "pretty" when celebs with the same "flaws" with get chastize for it in a magazine. i read one standing line one day about katherine heigel and her "saggy butt". she didn't really have a saggy butt but she is like a kettlebell queen like darcy and i so i took a little offense that this thin woman who can hoist heavy bells with the best of can't be given a positive spin. okay she is

not perfect but she is a strong lady to take on such a tough routine from a tough trainer! they sure as heck don't say that! i have a bit of belly buldge that hates to go away the older i get. its hard to say gosh i am strong i workout hard when i have the body of britney when everybody called her fat.shoot i would have like to have been britney fat LOL she was still in better shape then my abs look now. i have serious self esteem issues b/c i was raised by somebody in the same fashion. never looking on the bright side or the positives or even praising when it was good time too. just always negative negative could be better etc. there are millions like me too! like i said i won't blame media on ALL of it but they have their hands in a big chunk of it. i give a shout out to all my curvy girls though b/c real men love curves and a woman who isn't afraid to order more then just a light salad on a date. kassia

July 28, 2009

oh paul i wasn't attacking you at all. i was have just been bombarded with the commercials for these damn things. i must have saw it like 20 times in two hours last night when i was trying to watch house and lie to me. it seems what they strive to promote over say lie to me which is an excellent show. hell burn notice is an awesome show and it doesn't not get near the promotion the crappy reality shows do and they to ME seem to expliot ppls weaknesses. now do a show with our therapy sessions and you will have some tv LOL there is some reality ppl can live in horror with hahaha well not that funny but if ppl want reality just my story alone can haunt them imagine ppl that have it worse then me. kassia

July 28, 2009

Totally understand, and agree with a lot of it . I've said it a million times, but the most " sickening " thing to me is when people say they don't have time, or call me lucky because I look the way I do. Whatever. Some of us do have more time than others, yes, that's a fact. But, I have a hard time believing that there are that many out there who can't give themselves 20 minutes a day a few times a week............

Darcy

Wow, it looks like I really started something here. I didn't think the discussion would get this intense so fast.

Kassia has a great point that the media wrongly portrays how people--especially women--should look. I'm not in favor of that at all.

My suspicion about this show is that it may normalize obesity by showing what a great thing it is that such a woman can find a guy.

Now, before everybody throws rotten tomatoes (or worse) at me, let me make myself clear. I know it's not realistic to expect every woman to be a miniature size, and I wish the media didn't put that pressure out there. At the same time, approving of obesity is not a healthy message to send either. I suspect the tone of the show will be " See, here's a guy who's not too shallow to date a heavy woman unlike the rest of you shallow American men, so there's nothing wrong with being fat. "

To which my response is: Yes, there is something wrong with that. It's hazardous to your health. Where is the personal responsibility of those who are overweight? How can anybody--male or female--live a lifestyle that contributes to obesity and all the health problems that come with it and yet expect that other people should just overlook the problems of being in a relationship with an obese person?

Maybe the guy on the show does have a problem with women so he needs something pathetic like this show to get a date. (Of course he's also doing it for the money.) But if he's smart, why would he get into a relationship with a woman who is on a collision course with a heart attack and could be dead in a few years?

Of course, not all obesity is within our ability to control. I've known people with thyroid problems and things that make them obese no matter what. I don't blame them for the way they are, and I feel sorry for them. But I have no sympathy for the growing number of people in this country--both men and women--who are to darned lazy and undisciplined to take responsibility for keeping themselves healthy. Face it; that's what most of American obesity is.

I bust my butt down there in the workout room 5 or 6 days a week just like a lot of you. I don't think I have a right to expect that a woman should fall in love with me if decide to let myself blow up to 300 lbs. Willingly letting your health go down the drain like that is selfish, short-sighted and says a lot about your personality.

Okay, can I come out from cover now? :-)

>

> oh yeah kitchen nightmares. it was originally a BBC thing he did in britian then brought over here. tell ya the american version MADE tv b/c of how more embarrassing the ppl in america acted over britian.

>

> donna i have to agree we are over bombarded with images of perfection and beauty. while its nice to play dress and be glamorous there is almost no looking at the other side of things and if some magazines do its with such negativity that its hard to see ourselves as " pretty " when celebs with the same " flaws " with get chastize for it in a magazine.

>

> i read one standing line one day about katherine heigel and her " saggy butt " . she didn't really have a saggy butt but she is like a kettlebell queen like darcy and i so i took a little offense that this thin woman who can hoist heavy bells with the best of can't be given a positive spin. okay she is not perfect but she is a strong lady to take on such a tough routine from a tough trainer! they sure as heck don't say that!

>

> i have a bit of belly buldge that hates to go away the older i get. its hard to say gosh i am strong i workout hard when i have the body of britney when everybody called her fat.shoot i would have like to have been britney fat LOL she was still in better shape then my abs look now. i have serious self esteem issues b/c i was raised by somebody in the same fashion. never looking on the bright side or the positives or even praising when it was good time too. just always negative negative could be better etc. there are millions like me too! like i said i won't blame media on ALL of it but they have their hands in a big chunk of it.

>

> i give a shout out to all my curvy girls though b/c real men love curves and a woman who isn't afraid to order more then just a light salad on a date.

>

> kassia

>

July 28, 2009

i know a few like this and it stems further then just weight.its self esteem and lack of mental ability to do so,so their pattern is to make fun of others in some way or try to find a weak spot. whose to say where it started but they choose in some way to continue the pattern.obviously these women must be proud of themselves to have the confidence to be on tv and that is great but my issue is all these shows with average women or size 2 gals, always exploit drama and this one i am afraid will go for the social jugular with the weight and what ppl think of them and their weight and judge them for weight and looks. some of them look very pretty and seem so sweet. like i say before i have a bit of a belly bulge and it bothers me i am trying to work on it,but i have one bitch at work that will just point out and be negative like this little

bulge defines who i am. there is more to me then a little stomach. there are just as many ppl like the evil woman i work with(whom is naturally thin good for her but eats like crap and parties like she is 20 again but won't come weight lift with me hhhmm) who will be willinging to define you to other based on how you look and its almost that repeat pattern again of ppl judging you. even working out they expect me to be thin like pari hilton or something when i am looking for strength and ability. overall its a media frenzy of looks! well i don't seem ppl on this group on any magazine covers and they are more of an inspiration and more beautiful then celebs and reality 15 min of fame stars. but not everybody would appreciate the beauty of each of us b/c they are so wrapped up in working out for looks then they are about health and strength and i blame a lot of tv for that. kassia fitness blogSpecial Needs Scouting I just lose all patience with people who whine about their obesity or poor health even though they have made the choices that made them that way.---

July 28, 2009

This has been an interesting thread!

Judy had some good points, too that you can be thin or "average" size and still be unhealthy. I do know many "thin" people who have high BP, high cholesterol, who are unable to walk up a flight of stairs, etc.

And, I do agree with Kassia that there are some people who just can't - for whatever reason- make the leap to lose weight, even though they may "intellectually" know that they should. My SIL is one of those people. She is in the medical profession but she is horribly overweight - I see her once a year and each year I see her she is bigger. She developed Type 2 Diabetes in her '30's. I think she knows intellectually that she needs to lose weight to improve her health, but for whatever reason, I'm sure it is emotional, she just doesn't make changes to do so. She talks a good game, but doesn't make any lasting changes. And in fact, she has probably convinced herself that she is one of those "fit but fat" people 0- which I don't think she is - certainly not with Type 2 Diabetes, High Blood Pressure, and High Cholesterol.

My DH is overweight, he is a "foodie" - he knows what he has to do to make changes - lately he has been doing so and has lost a bit over 20 lbs. I'm cautiously optimistic, but in the many years that we have been together he tends to "fall off the wagon" quite often. I think this time he may have been scared into dropping weight b/c he started having an irregular heartbeat - it turned out to be nothing - but it scared him into going to see a cardiologist and it got him on track with eating right. He isn't following any plan - just plain old ordinary counting calories and making wiser choices based on reading labels. My DH is also not a big "exercise for the sake of exercise" guy - he is fine going for a hike, or bike ride, or doing yard work, but he is definately not one to get up at the crack of dawn (like me) to put in an exercise DVD or take a walk or jog on the TM. But, I'll take what i

can get, the weight loss alone has reduced his BP and we'll find out about his cholesterol once he has his blood test this week - I suspect it will be improved due to the weight loss.

Sorry to go on!Donna

Subject: Re: OT: More to Love?To: exercisevideos Date: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 2:31 PM

Thanks, everybody. Donna, I'll even go a little further than you did. I think it is fair to make a judgment about people who won't lose weight. (Not those who for medical reasons CAN'T but those who just WON'T.) It does say something about you and what you think of the people who love you if you're not willing to make your own health a priority. I'm all in favor of supporting those who want to improve themselves. I just lose all patience with people who whine about their obesity or poor health even though they have made the choices that made them that way.> >> > oh yeah kitchen nightmares. it was originally a BBC thing he did in britian then brought over here. tell ya the american version MADE tv b/c of how more embarrassing the ppl in america acted over britian. > > > > donna i have to agree we are over bombarded with images of perfection and beauty. while its nice to play

dress and be glamorous there is almost no looking at the other side of things and if some magazines do its with such negativity that its hard to see ourselves as "pretty" when celebs with the same "flaws" with get chastize for it in a magazine. > > > > i read one standing line one day about katherine heigel and her "saggy butt". she didn't really have a saggy butt but she is like a kettlebell queen like darcy and i so i took a little offense that this thin woman who can hoist heavy bells with the best of can't be given a positive spin. okay she is not perfect but she is a strong lady to take on such a tough routine from a tough trainer! they sure as heck don't say that! > > > > i have a bit of belly buldge that hates to go away the older i get. its hard to say gosh i am strong i workout hard when i have the body of britney when everybody called her fat.shoot i would have like to have been britney fat LOL she was

still in better shape then my abs look now. i have serious self esteem issues b/c i was raised by somebody in the same fashion. never looking on the bright side or the positives or even praising when it was good time too. just always negative negative could be better etc. there are millions like me too! like i said i won't blame media on ALL of it but they have their hands in a big chunk of it. > > > > i give a shout out to all my curvy girls though b/c real men love curves and a woman who isn't afraid to order more then just a light salad on a date. > > > > kassia> >>

July 28, 2009

Donna:so your DH is what the public health community is trying to promote. Make sensible food choices and add activity to your life! Take steps walk more, read food labels etc... seriously not everyone has over 50 exercise dvds (ok I think I am close to that!)judyTo: exercisevideos Sent:

Tuesday, July 28, 2009 3:09:55 PMSubject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love?

This has been an interesting thread!

Judy had some good points, too that you can be thin or "average" size and still be unhealthy. I do know many "thin" people who have high BP, high cholesterol, who are unable to walk up a flight of stairs, etc.

And, I do agree with Kassia that there are some people who just can't - for whatever reason- make the leap to lose weight, even though they may "intellectually" know that they should. My SIL is one of those people. She is in the medical profession but she is horribly overweight - I see her once a year and each year I see her she is bigger. She developed Type 2 Diabetes in her '30's. I think she knows intellectually that she needs to lose weight to improve her health, but for whatever reason, I'm sure it is emotional, she just doesn't make changes to do so. She talks a good game, but doesn't make any lasting changes. And in fact, she has probably convinced herself that she is one of those "fit but fat" people 0- which I don't think she is - certainly not with Type 2 Diabetes, High Blood Pressure, and High Cholesterol.

My DH is overweight, he is a "foodie" - he knows what he has to do to make changes - lately he has been doing so and has lost a bit over 20 lbs. I'm cautiously optimistic, but in the many years that we have been together he tends to "fall off the wagon" quite often. I think this time he may have been scared into dropping weight b/c he started having an irregular heartbeat - it turned out to be nothing - but it scared him into going to see a cardiologist and it got him on track with eating right. He isn't following any plan - just plain old ordinary counting calories and making wiser choices based on reading labels. My DH is also not a big "exercise for the sake of exercise" guy - he is fine going for a hike, or bike ride, or doing yard work, but he is definately not one to get up at the crack of dawn (like me) to put in an exercise DVD or take a walk or jog on the TM. But, I'll take what i

can get, the weight loss alone has reduced his BP and we'll find out about his cholesterol once he has his blood test this week - I suspect it will be improved due to the weight loss.

Sorry to go on!Donna

From: revaddict <revaddictyahoo (DOT) com>Subject: Re: OT: More to Love?To: exercisevideos@ yahoogroups. comDate: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 2:31 PM

Thanks, everybody. Donna, I'll even go a little further than you did. I think it is fair to make a judgment about people who won't lose weight. (Not those who for medical reasons CAN'T but those who just WON'T.) It does say something about you and what you think of the people who love you if you're not willing to make your own health a priority. I'm all in favor of supporting those who want to improve themselves. I just lose all patience with people who whine about their obesity or poor health even though they have made the choices that made them that way.> >> > oh yeah kitchen nightmares. it was originally a BBC thing he did in britian then brought over here. tell ya the american version MADE tv b/c of how more embarrassing the ppl in america acted over britian. > > > > donna i have to agree we are over bombarded with images of perfection and beauty. while its nice to play

dress and be glamorous there is almost no looking at the other side of things and if some magazines do its with such negativity that its hard to see ourselves as "pretty" when celebs with the same "flaws" with get chastize for it in a magazine. > > > > i read one standing line one day about katherine heigel and her "saggy butt". she didn't really have a saggy butt but she is like a kettlebell queen like darcy and i so i took a little offense that this thin woman who can hoist heavy bells with the best of can't be given a positive spin. okay she is not perfect but she is a strong lady to take on such a tough routine from a tough trainer! they sure as heck don't say that! > > > > i have a bit of belly buldge that hates to go away the older i get. its hard to say gosh i am strong i workout hard when i have the body of britney when everybody called her fat.shoot i would have like to have been britney fat LOL she was

still in better shape then my abs look now. i have serious self esteem issues b/c i was raised by somebody in the same fashion. never looking on the bright side or the positives or even praising when it was good time too. just always negative negative could be better etc. there are millions like me too! like i said i won't blame media on ALL of it but they have their hands in a big chunk of it. > > > > i give a shout out to all my curvy girls though b/c real men love curves and a woman who isn't afraid to order more then just a light salad on a date. > > > > kassia> >>

July 28, 2009

hi judy

yeah i saw something like that about even being slightly overweight but

still having good habits goes a long way for your health and sometimes

you are in better shape then others who may be naturally smaller but do

not have the same healthy habits. ppl have and always will come in

different shapes and sizes but seems some sizes are more reverred.

nowadays a beautiful size12-14 marilyn monroe wouldnt' stand a chance.

and gosh was she ever a beautiful glamour queen who was the same size

as ME

my problem is portions whether its over snacking on junk, eating to much at mealtime(even healthy foods) not enough water the list can go on. when i work my schedule is crazy i will go nearly 4 hours without food but half time i want to go to the gym after work but not on a full stomach so it seems like i am always snacking. i obviously workout and workout hard a lot of days and i am sure i am pretty strong and able to move freely without pain but many have this perceived notion that exercise=thin and its horrible. its horrible how that woman at work treats me b/c i can't share my positive love of working out without turning into "well you just not thin enough to actually be working out hard". its hurtful and i am sure these women on this stupid show will be drug through mud b/c ppl will tune it. i figure i am one more person who won't do that who won't use that drama to entertain ratings. kassia fitness blogSpecial Needs Scouting Subject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love?To: exercisevideos Date: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 2:53 PM

As someone who researches this this is a very interesting thread.I am right now 20lb overweight - I have no excuse except that stupid snooze button! I keep trying and I know I will get back into shape... just with healthcare reform my work hours are lets say - crazy...... I need those 6 hours...... next week I can get up at 5am and not go to work but go workout!One of my current research is looking at fit and 'fat' people. There is growing evidence that those that are a bit overweight but who are working out are in better shape and have less risk for future health issues than those that are thin but do not workout. We have all seen skinny smokers, look at drug addicts and alcoholics many are tiny but in miserable healthI am sure you saw the research publicized

about the "cost of obesity is 10% medical costs" this study does not control for fitness (plus has a lot of other flaws). I did a similar research but when I controlled for physical activity this amount declines alot! So I am on the crusade for being fit and eating healthy is what matters (the body will follow for some the change will be faster than other but the body will change)Anyway - body image is one thing but if you understand you are bigger (like me) but want to change (like me) that is different then those that just think it is ok to walk around with these bad health habits........ ok off my soap box.judy s

July 28, 2009

keep it up you will be better for it in the long runI too struggle with portions. I can eat a whole bag of carrots (or chips!) without realizing it!we will be better off though with our work and support systemjTo: exercisevideos Sent: Tuesday, July 28, 2009 3:58:02 PMSubject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love?

hi judy

yeah i saw something like that about even being slightly overweight but

still having good habits goes a long way for your health and sometimes

you are in better shape then others who may be naturally smaller but do

not have the same healthy habits. ppl have and always will come in

different shapes and sizes but seems some sizes are more reverred.

nowadays a beautiful size12-14 marilyn monroe wouldnt' stand a chance.

and gosh was she ever a beautiful glamour queen who was the same size

as ME

my problem is portions whether its over snacking on junk, eating to much at mealtime(even healthy foods) not enough water the list can go on. when i work my schedule is crazy i will go nearly 4 hours without food but half time i want to go to the gym after work but not on a full stomach so it seems like i am always snacking. i obviously workout and workout hard a lot of days and i am sure i am pretty strong and able to move freely without pain but many have this perceived notion that exercise=thin and its horrible. its horrible how that woman at work treats me b/c i can't share my positive love of working out without turning into "well you just not thin enough to actually be working out hard". its hurtful and i am sure these women on this stupid show will be drug through mud b/c ppl will tune it. i figure i am one more person who won't do that who won't use that drama to entertain ratings. kassia fitness blogSpecial Needs Scouting From: Judy S <k9sports4gsps@ yahoo.com>Subject: Re: Re: OT: More to Love?To: exercisevideos@ yahoogroups. comDate: Tuesday, July 28, 2009, 2:53 PM

As someone who researches this this is a very interesting thread.I am right now 20lb overweight - I have no excuse except that stupid snooze button! I keep trying and I know I will get back into shape... just with healthcare reform my work hours are lets say - crazy...... I need those 6 hours...... next week I can get up at 5am and not go to work but go workout!One of my current research is looking at fit and 'fat' people. There is growing evidence that those that are a bit overweight but who are working out are in better shape and have less risk for future health issues than those that are thin but do not workout. We have all seen skinny smokers, look at drug addicts and alcoholics many are tiny but in miserable healthI am sure you saw the research publicized

about the "cost of obesity is 10% medical costs" this study does not control for fitness (plus has a lot of other flaws). I did a similar research but when I controlled for physical activity this amount declines alot! So I am on the crusade for being fit and eating healthy is what matters (the body will follow for some the change will be faster than other but the body will change)Anyway - body image is one thing but if you understand you are bigger (like me) but want to change (like me) that is different then those that just think it is ok to walk around with these bad health habits...... .. ok off my soap box.judy s

July 28, 2009

gosh girl i am gonna need you when i get back to work LOL its very hard for me to talk sense into senseless ppl and they are truly horrible on the topic. i am glad i have this place to talk positive about working out and ppl don't judge they are just there with you. i don't talk to brag or think i am better i just LOVE to workout. some days its rough but most of the time i can't wait to get into the gym and i just love my cardio kickboxing and running.kassia fitness blogSpecial Needs Scouting --- On

Tue, 7/28/09, Judy S wrote:keep it up you will be better for it in the long runI too struggle with portions. I can eat a whole bag of carrots (or chips!) without realizing it!we will be better off though with our work and support systemj

July 28, 2009

i was gonna stay out of this one but i have pipe up finally. i agree that media has a sick impact on women and young girls. i'd do anything to protect all the females in the world from ever feeling inadequate but it'll never happen. so i have to say that i like the idea of this show! it tells the world that there are big men and women out here and we are ready to be seen and apart of the tv life. i say we because through out my life there has been many times i was obese! i workout to these exercise videos and no one on themm is the least bit overweight. at times it was hard for me to do the workouts starring at a bunch of skinny a** little witches. it's easier for all these little skinny things to do the owrkouts, to get jobs, to be on tv, to get music contracts, ect, ect, ect. look at what

tv shows, news reports, movies and vidoes tell us, u have to be thin abd look good! that hurts! it's nice to see for a change that that superficial idea is wrong! TrishaTo: exercisevideos Sent: Tuesday, July 28, 2009 12:06:06 PMSubject: Re: OT: More to Love?

Wow, it looks like I really started something here. I didn't think the discussion would get this intense so fast.

Kassia has a great point that the media wrongly portrays how people--especially women--should look. I'm not in favor of that at all.

My suspicion about this show is that it may normalize obesity by showing what a great thing it is that such a woman can find a guy.

Now, before everybody throws rotten tomatoes (or worse) at me, let me make myself clear. I know it's not realistic to expect every woman to be a miniature size, and I wish the media didn't put that pressure out there. At the same time, approving of obesity is not a healthy message to send either. I suspect the tone of the show will be "See, here's a guy who's not too shallow to date a heavy woman unlike the rest of you shallow American men, so there's nothing wrong with being fat."

To which my response is: Yes, there is something wrong with that. It's hazardous to your health. Where is the personal responsibility of those who are overweight? How can anybody--male or female--live a lifestyle that contributes to obesity and all the health problems that come with it and yet expect that other people should just overlook the problems of being in a relationship with an obese person?

Maybe the guy on the show does have a problem with women so he needs something pathetic like this show to get a date. (Of course he's also doing it for the money.) But if he's smart, why would he get into a relationship with a woman who is on a collision course with a heart attack and could be dead in a few years?

Of course, not all obesity is within our ability to control. I've known people with thyroid problems and things that make them obese no matter what. I don't blame them for the way they are, and I feel sorry for them. But I have no sympathy for the growing number of people in this country--both men and women--who are to darned lazy and undisciplined to take responsibility for keeping themselves healthy. Face it; that's what most of American obesity is.

I bust my butt down there in the workout room 5 or 6 days a week just like a lot of you. I don't think I have a right to expect that a woman should fall in love with me if decide to let myself blow up to 300 lbs. Willingly letting your health go down the drain like that is selfish, short-sighted and says a lot about your personality.

Okay, can I come out from cover now? :-)

>

> oh yeah kitchen nightmares. it was originally a BBC thing he did in britian then brought over here. tell ya the american version MADE tv b/c of how more embarrassing the ppl in america acted over britian.

>

> donna i have to agree we are over bombarded with images of perfection and beauty. while its nice to play dress and be glamorous there is almost no looking at the other side of things and if some magazines do its with such negativity that its hard to see ourselves as "pretty" when celebs with the same "flaws" with get chastize for it in a magazine.

>

> i read one standing line one day about katherine heigel and her "saggy butt". she didn't really have a saggy butt but she is like a kettlebell queen like darcy and i so i took a little offense that this thin woman who can hoist heavy bells with the best of can't be given a positive spin. okay she is not perfect but she is a strong lady to take on such a tough routine from a tough trainer! they sure as heck don't say that!

>

> i have a bit of belly buldge that hates to go away the older i get. its hard to say gosh i am strong i workout hard when i have the body of britney when everybody called her fat.shoot i would have like to have been britney fat LOL she was still in better shape then my abs look now. i have serious self esteem issues b/c i was raised by somebody in the same fashion. never looking on the bright side or the positives or even praising when it was good time too. just always negative negative could be better etc. there are millions like me too! like i said i won't blame media on ALL of it but they have their hands in a big chunk of it.

>

> i give a shout out to all my curvy girls though b/c real men love curves and a woman who isn't afraid to order more then just a light salad on a date.

>

> kassia

>

July 28, 2009

What you're missing though, Trisha, about workout videos is that many of those women used to be plus-sized and got themselves healthy, not "skinny"! On some videos they'll tell you someone lost 70 pounds using the star's videos, etc. I had a lady in one of my WW meetings expressing exactly what you did and had another member tell her this information. Many people in the group found it inspiring and started changing their thoughts about using workout videos. When I first started with videos I was not overweight but was also not at all toned. I looked at the people in the videos and picked out the bodies I wanted to have. I knew that if I kept at it I could. (I'm still working at it but have made great progress!)

I agree the media celebrating very thin with huge boobs does have a very negative impact on women but I don't think celebrating being overweight is any better. The guy on that show isn't exactly the hunky model type like on the bachelor either so what message does that send? That yes, these women can get an "average" guy but not a male super model? That doesn't send a very positive message either I think.

(who really should be cooking dinner & who meant to read the other posts on this topic before jumping in but just jumped in anyway, sorry if these points have already been made, I promise to be quiet until I read more from now on!)

Re: OT: More to Love?

Wow, it looks like I really started something here. I didn't think the discussion would get this intense so fast.Kassia has a great point that the media wrongly portrays how people--especially women--should look. I'm not in favor of that at all.My suspicion about this show is that it may normalize obesity by showing what a great thing it is that such a woman can find a guy.Now, before everybody throws rotten tomatoes (or worse) at me, let me make myself clear. I know it's not realistic to expect every woman to be a miniature size, and I wish the media didn't put that pressure out there. At the same time, approving of obesity is not a healthy message to send either. I suspect the tone of the show will be "See, here's a guy who's not too shallow to date a heavy woman unlike the rest of you shallow American men, so there's nothing wrong with being fat."To which my response is: Yes, there is something wrong with that. It's hazardous to your health. Where is the personal responsibility of those who are overweight? How can anybody--male or female--live a lifestyle that contributes to obesity and all the health problems that come with it and yet expect that other people should just overlook the problems of being in a relationship with an obese person?Maybe the guy on the show does have a problem with women so he needs something pathetic like this show to get a date. (Of course he's also doing it for the money.) But if he's smart, why would he get into a relationship with a woman who is on a collision course with a heart attack and could be dead in a few years?Of course, not all obesity is within our ability to control. I've known people with thyroid problems and things that make them obese no matter what. I don't blame them for the way they are, and I feel sorry for them. But I have no sympathy for the growing number of people in this country--both men and women--who are to darned lazy and undisciplined to take responsibility for keeping themselves healthy. Face it; that's what most of American obesity is.I bust my butt down there in the workout room 5 or 6 days a week just like a lot of you. I don't think I have a right to expect that a woman should fall in love with me if decide to let myself blow up to 300 lbs. Willingly letting your health go down the drain like that is selfish, short-sighted and says a lot about your personality.Okay, can I come out from cover now? :-)>> oh yeah kitchen nightmares. it was originally a BBC thing he did in britian then brought over here. tell ya the american version MADE tv b/c of how more embarrassing the ppl in america acted over britian. > > donna i have to agree we are over bombarded with images of perfection and beauty. while its nice to play dress and be glamorous there is almost no looking at the other side of things and if some magazines do its with such negativity that its hard to see ourselves as "pretty" when celebs with the same "flaws" with get chastize for it in a magazine. > > i read one standing line one day about katherine heigel and her "saggy butt". she didn't really have a saggy butt but she is like a kettlebell queen like darcy and i so i took a little offense that this thin woman who can hoist heavy bells with the best of can't be given a positive spin. okay she is not perfect but she is a strong lady to take on such a tough routine from a tough trainer! they sure as heck don't say that! > > i have a bit of belly buldge that hates to go away the older i get. its hard to say gosh i am strong i workout hard when i have the body of britney when everybody called her fat.shoot i would have like to have been britney fat LOL she was still in better shape then my abs look now. i have serious self esteem issues b/c i was raised by somebody in the same fashion. never looking on the bright side or the positives or even praising when it was good time too. just always negative negative could be better etc. there are millions like me too! like i said i won't blame media on ALL of it but they have their hands in a big chunk of it. > > i give a shout out to all my curvy girls though b/c real men love curves and a woman who isn't afraid to order more then just a light salad on a date. > > kassia>

July 28, 2009

trish i can seem some videos where you say skinny a$$(i like jari love videos but do not like her ribs sticking at me) but i have some kathy smith back in the day and she was pretty healthy as opposed to an extremely lean self she has now. not sure if you ever looked into amy bento or cathe friedrich. they are lean but i wouldn't call them skinny. especially since they both can out bench me in a heart beat LOL they are full muscular women. ya never see any of them on a reality show either.the only reason i am not crazy about the show is b/c its always drama! if not a dating show then another show its all drama and its not really reality b/c they kind of force the drama(the producers do) and the publicity will really play on "weight". i don't know why it can't be just ppl not skinny,not plus size, not black or white just HUMAN. i would still not like the

show anyway b/c i just don't like that kind of show but ppl do get their feelings hurt and TV knows how to play it up without regard to them and this whole premise is the guy likes his women bigger. which is fine good for him but really a show? and since we are on the topic of not getting our space in the sun how about my size. not skinny not plus size falling in the middle we get NO love, as you can tell about my rant about ppl at work. with the bigger women i am a skinny bitch to the skinny girls i am a heffer. doesn't feel to good which is why i try not to judge somebody on weight and wish ppl would see the beauty in all shapes and sizes. we have no representation either. kassia

July 28, 2009

gosh laura i am sorry you had to go through that. i understand though b/c its like you are a good person and you will be whether you were 90 or 900lbs and why does a little weight have to define the person you are.and men like that i hope kick themselves for not getting to understand that and seeing how great a person is and weight doesn't define that person. and i can't believe you are even in the 200 range. you certainly don't show it and even before seeing all your pics i thought you were a great beautiful person its just nice to see that smile matches the personality! yeah dh does that "if i lose an arm etc etc" haven't gone anywhere yet and certainly not going anywhere now. fitness blogSpecial Needs Scouting I have been told by men before in tactful and sometimes not-so-tactful ways that they liked me a lot but that I was too fat for them to date. I understand, you like what you like, but it also bums me out that they supposedly like me that much and this is the one thing that stands in the way. What if I was 140 lbs, they got everything they wanted, then I got in a car accident and lost both of my legs? Would they still love me and stick around or would they

split?

July 28, 2009

replying to myself wanted to clarify that therapy is OMG tough and if i haven't left yet with all i heard him having a few extra pounds or losing an arm isn't going to change anything now and if i haven't left before when it was worse for us i am certainly not going anywhere now that we are working on things. kassia yeah dh does that "if i lose an arm etc etc" haven't gone

anywhere yet and certainly not going anywhere now. fitness blogSpecial Needs Scouting I have been told by men before in tactful and sometimes not-so-tactful ways that they liked me a lot but that I was too fat for them to date. I understand, you like what you like, but it also bums me out that they supposedly like me that much and this is the one thing that stands in the way. What if I was 140

lbs, they got everything they wanted, then I got in a car accident and lost both of my legs? Would they still love me and stick around or would they

split?

July 28, 2009

i have to say i'm sorry my last post was kinda mean and i didn't mean for it to sound that way. i in NO way meant to insult or criticize anyone i was just trying to express how i feel about that! TrishaTo: exercisevideos Sent: Tuesday, July 28, 2009 12:06:06 PMSubject: Re: OT: More to Love?