a letter i wrote about how hard homework is for us

[Guest guest]

i thought maybe someone else might be able to use this too... our

homework situation was aweful and this letter helped me make school

understand!

I know it is a very rough draft... i am not good at writing letters

but i thought this one turned out pretty good.

Thank you for including me in making this decision about how her

study time should be used.

I would like to see the time used for any homework she has to do. As

i have said in the past, to other teachers and staff, homework is

very difficult for us. She had math work one night last week and it

took us about 20 minutes for her to answer me about 3 minus 1 or

something equally as easy. During the time she wont answer she is

complaining the 'work is too hard, " i am hungry " , thirsty. " cant we

do it later " , my back itches " , i want to do this in my bedroom " , " i

want to play with my friend " , " can i turn on the tv " . - so we take a

short break (sometimes before and sometimes after i lose my temper)

then after about 5 minutes or so (or after i calm down) we try it

again, and we go through it all over again.

I know of some ways I could try homework differently. I think she

gets overwhelmed when she has a whole math paper to do - so if i give

her one problem at a time- and i keep the paper... (no, that wouldnt

work because she would argue with me that she wants the entire paper).

I dont know what the answer is. I just know that what i was told by a

doctor a couple of years ago is very true. I cant wear all the hats

with her. I cant be her mom - her teacher- a friend - all at the same

time. its ALL I CAN DO just to be her mom.

A lot of nights after homework I am frustrated, agitated, depressed

and just emotionally drained!

This problem affects the entire family. The I dont have the patience

for my " main hat' - being her mom.

I've said it before and I am saying it again - we need help!

I am not a mom who is just trying to get out of doing work because i

dont care. I am trying to avoid frustration and all the other

problems that make our home life unbearable.

I have sought out help from several places-

family coordination center

the arc of southern md

support groups (both online and here in the county)

along with professional evaluations, from the best doctors and

hospitals, who have offered advice for school (offered advice isnt

the term i was looking for) They are guidelines for the help she is

entitled to.

I know I have made this sound like homework is the only issue and it

is not. We have a lot of behavioral issues that we have been seeking

out help for in other ways. It might also sound like this letter was

written in anger (in some ways) and it definitely is not. I know that

you care and are willing to help and i appreciate it more than I can

say.

so... with all this being said- to answer your question, yes, if she

can work on homework in school during study time that would be great.

If other work is brought home, for me to do with her, I need someone

to teach me how to do it with her. As she is getting older- her

frustrations are also growing. and i NEED someone to physically show

me how to work with her either in school or at home.