is this group really lbd group

March 28, 2006

Pardon me for asking but I am just about ready to jump off of the side of a

building because of my mother. I feel she has this disorder but there seem to be

no doctors out there that believe me,save on who is no longer in the picture.

My mothers course of events in this disease will not follow the rules. She has

a history of psychiatric disorder with no,overt, events for years. Them in the

last 4 years she has break downs(complete with hallucinations and raging

psychotic features) and then SHE GETS WELL! and everybody thinks she is going

to be just fine. Well after 5 events I know better. She is independent and

intelligent.

The last episode involved a trip to the psych ward an starting on neuroleptic

drugs. She got all of the terrible parkensonian side effects finally wound up in

the hospital and finally in a nursing home. Then for the 4 th time she begged me

for help and I came. I had run to Alaska after 10 months of verbal and physical

abuse from her. I had a great job100,000 a year along with peace and quiet.

She is now on the up swing and is driving and thinks that she is just fine and

now I am the enemy that is out to steal all of her money . There is more but

what is the point.......

I am the only child. I am a nurse. I am 60 years old. I have given up a home

and all of my personal belongings. I have left three great jobs to rescue her

and and swore before the last break down that I could not do this any more. She

is mean and vicious with her comments when she gets to this stage.

As you can guess this is the tip of my miserable iceberg.

I need help but there really is none. Has anyone in this group had or heard of

a case like this?

Thanks Barb

---------------------------------

Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. PC-to-Phone calls for ridiculously low rates.

March 29, 2006

Welcome to the group Barb. I hope you find the answers you need here

and on www.lbda.org Your situation started to sound like all of ours

until you mentioned that your mother went from NH to back to driving -

from my limited dealings with LBD that sounds unlike any of our

situations. I think your mom needs a more accurate diagnosis and hope

that you find a doctor that can help.

>

> Pardon me for asking but I am just about ready to jump off of the

side of a building because of my mother. I feel she has this disorder

but there seem to be no doctors out there that believe me,save on who

is no longer in the picture.

>

> My mothers course of events in this disease will not follow the

rules. She has a history of psychiatric disorder with no,overt,

events for years. Them in the last 4 years she has break downs

(complete with hallucinations and raging psychotic features) and

then SHE GETS WELL! and everybody thinks she is going to be just

fine. Well after 5 events I know better. She is independent and

intelligent.

>

> The last episode involved a trip to the psych ward an starting on

neuroleptic drugs. She got all of the terrible parkensonian side

effects finally wound up in the hospital and finally in a nursing

home. Then for the 4 th time she begged me for help and I came. I had

run to Alaska after 10 months of verbal and physical abuse from her.

I had a great job100,000 a year along with peace and quiet.

>

> She is now on the up swing and is driving and thinks that she is

just fine and now I am the enemy that is out to steal all of her

money . There is more but what is the point.......

> I am the only child. I am a nurse. I am 60 years old. I have given

up a home and all of my personal belongings. I have left three great

jobs to rescue her and and swore before the last break down that I

could not do this any more. She is mean and vicious with her comments

when she gets to this stage.

>

> As you can guess this is the tip of my miserable iceberg.

>

> I need help but there really is none. Has anyone in this group had

or heard of a case like this?

>

> Thanks Barb

>

> ---------------------------------

> Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. PC-to-Phone calls for ridiculously low

rates.

>

March 29, 2006

OH my goodness, Barb! What a terrible row to hoe. I am so sorry.

I will tell you this, my husband was an only child. His mother was very ugly

to him, because my husband said she needed a nursing home when she started

messing herself. I would have taken care of her, but he said my health wasn't

good enough. (that's a laugh now that I am 73 and worse health than ever, and

have my husband to care for)

Anyway, she cussed him for everything she could think of. She was not

normally a cussing woman. But with her son, who put her in a nursing home, she

was

horrible. He came home crying after a visit.

I am so sorry to see this happening to you. I hope someone has some good

advise

Imogene

In a message dated 3/28/2006 10:11:04 PM Central Standard Time,

mmmm88f@... writes:

Pardon me for asking but I am just about ready to jump off of the side of a

building because of my mother. I feel she has this disorder but there seem to

be no doctors out there that believe me,save on who is no longer in the

picture.

My mothers course of events in this disease will not follow the rules. She

has a history of psychiatric disorder with no,overt, events for years. Them in

the last 4 years she has break downs(complete with hallucinations and raging

psychotic features) and then SHE GETS WELL! and everybody thinks she is

going to be just fine. Well after 5 events I know better. She is independent

and

intelligent.

The last episode involved a trip to the psych ward an starting on

neuroleptic drugs. She got all of the terrible parkensonian side effects

finally wound

up in the hospital and finally in a nursing home. Then for the 4 th time she

begged me for help and I came. I had run to Alaska after 10 months of verbal

and physical abuse from her. I had a great job100,000 a year along with peace

and quiet.

She is now on the up swing and is driving and thinks that she is just fine

and now I am the enemy that is out to steal all of her money . There is more

but what is the point.......

I am the only child. I am a nurse. I am 60 years old. I have given up a home

and all of my personal belongings. I have left three great jobs to rescue

her and and swore before the last break down that I could not do this any

more. She is mean and vicious with her comments when she gets to this stage.

As you can guess this is the tip of my miserable iceberg.

I need help but there really is none. Has anyone in this group had or heard

of a case like this?

Thanks Barb

---------------------------------

March 29, 2006

Barbara, I am so sorry to hear how horrible this is for you. I'm

sure it's more difficult to determine the LBD when there may also be

psychiatric issues that were already in place, I have no idea how

badly that could impact the entire issue, the diagnosis, and the

treatment.

What I'm concerned about is how upset you sound and wonder if there

is any help you can get for yourself in dealing with this? It's so

much harder to be involved with a family member that there are major

issues with already - for your own sanity you may need to remove

yourself from some of this - I really can't advise - but just wonder

if you have someone else in your family or a trusted friend or

counselor to discuss what is best with you?

It would be very hard to detach the psychiatric issues from the LBD

issues. I'm sure there must be others on this list who have

experienced those problems. You are right, several of us are

blessed to have great Moms to start with so it definitely helps in

the work of a caretaker.

Please feel free to vent on this list - it is totally safe and we

will try to help in any way we can.

> >

> > Pardon me for asking but I am just about ready to jump off of

the

> side of a building because of my mother. I feel she has this

disorder

> but there seem to be no doctors out there that believe me,save on

who

> is no longer in the picture.

> >

> > My mothers course of events in this disease will not follow

the

> rules. She has a history of psychiatric disorder with no,overt,

> events for years. Them in the last 4 years she has break downs

> (complete with hallucinations and raging psychotic features) and

> then SHE GETS WELL! and everybody thinks she is going to be just

> fine. Well after 5 events I know better. She is independent and

> intelligent.

> >

> > The last episode involved a trip to the psych ward an starting

on

> neuroleptic drugs. She got all of the terrible parkensonian side

> effects finally wound up in the hospital and finally in a nursing

> home. Then for the 4 th time she begged me for help and I came. I

had

> run to Alaska after 10 months of verbal and physical abuse from

her.

> I had a great job100,000 a year along with peace and quiet.

> >

> > She is now on the up swing and is driving and thinks that she

is

> just fine and now I am the enemy that is out to steal all of her

> money . There is more but what is the point.......

> > I am the only child. I am a nurse. I am 60 years old. I have

given

> up a home and all of my personal belongings. I have left three

great

> jobs to rescue her and and swore before the last break down that

I

> could not do this any more. She is mean and vicious with her

comments

> when she gets to this stage.

> >

> > As you can guess this is the tip of my miserable iceberg.

> >

> > I need help but there really is none. Has anyone in this group

had

> or heard of a case like this?

> >

> > Thanks Barb

> >

> > ---------------------------------

> > Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. PC-to-Phone calls for ridiculously

low

> rates.

> >

March 29, 2006

Hi Barb

Welcome, and I understand where you are coming from. I could have

had a better mother too, and that goes for my husband too. My MIL

gives off the impression now that she is a sweet old (69) lady, tea

granny and all. My husbands' first cousin said at Christmas that she

doesn't deserve the care she is getting now. I find that I am

resenting her presence as she ignored my children and did a lowsy job

raising her two. She has lived with me for a year now. Soon that

will end. Just wanted to let you know that you are not alone.

, borough, ON, Canada

> >

> > Pardon me for asking but I am just about ready to jump off of

the

> side of a building because of my mother. I feel she has this

disorder

> but there seem to be no doctors out there that believe me,save on

who

> is no longer in the picture.

> >

> > My mothers course of events in this disease will not follow the

> rules. She has a history of psychiatric disorder with no,overt,

> events for years. Them in the last 4 years she has break downs

> (complete with hallucinations and raging psychotic features) and

> then SHE GETS WELL! and everybody thinks she is going to be just

> fine. Well after 5 events I know better. She is independent and

> intelligent.

> >

> > The last episode involved a trip to the psych ward an starting

on

> neuroleptic drugs. She got all of the terrible parkensonian side

> effects finally wound up in the hospital and finally in a nursing

> home. Then for the 4 th time she begged me for help and I came. I

had

> run to Alaska after 10 months of verbal and physical abuse from

her.

> I had a great job100,000 a year along with peace and quiet.

> >

> > She is now on the up swing and is driving and thinks that she

is

> just fine and now I am the enemy that is out to steal all of her

> money . There is more but what is the point.......

> > I am the only child. I am a nurse. I am 60 years old. I have

given

> up a home and all of my personal belongings. I have left three

great

> jobs to rescue her and and swore before the last break down that

I

> could not do this any more. She is mean and vicious with her

comments

> when she gets to this stage.

> >

> > As you can guess this is the tip of my miserable iceberg.

> >

> > I need help but there really is none. Has anyone in this group

had

> or heard of a case like this?

> >

> > Thanks Barb

> >

> > ---------------------------------

> > Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. PC-to-Phone calls for ridiculously

low

> rates.

> >

March 29, 2006

Barbara:

Don't jump off a building - vent here all you like - I am so sorry that your

relationship with your mother has not been a good one. I hope we can give you

some support.

You need to note that with LBD " THERE IS NO PATTERN " . Each of our mothers,

fathers, uncles, husbands and wives are travelling a path that is unique. Some

similarities but definately unique.

You are not alone in trying to get the medical community to recognize and / or

confirm that your Mother has LBD. There are many here who have had to educate

their doctors. Some have been successful, others have not.

We just keep plugging and taking things one day at a time.

in Cresswell ON

Barbara Lyon wrote:

Pardon me for asking but I am just about ready to jump off of the side of a

building because of my mother. I feel she has this disorder but there seem to be

no doctors out there that believe me,save on who is no longer in the picture.

My mothers course of events in this disease will not follow the rules. She has a

history of psychiatric disorder with no,overt, events for years. Them in the

last 4 years she has break downs(complete with hallucinations and raging

psychotic features) and then SHE GETS WELL! and everybody thinks she is going

to be just fine. Well after 5 events I know better. She is independent and

intelligent.

The last episode involved a trip to the psych ward an starting on neuroleptic

drugs. She got all of the terrible parkensonian side effects finally wound up in

the hospital and finally in a nursing home. Then for the 4 th time she begged me

for help and I came. I had run to Alaska after 10 months of verbal and physical

abuse from her. I had a great job100,000 a year along with peace and quiet.

She is now on the up swing and is driving and thinks that she is just fine and

now I am the enemy that is out to steal all of her money . There is more but

what is the point.......

I am the only child. I am a nurse. I am 60 years old. I have given up a home and

all of my personal belongings. I have left three great jobs to rescue her and

and swore before the last break down that I could not do this any more. She is

mean and vicious with her comments when she gets to this stage.

As you can guess this is the tip of my miserable iceberg.

I need help but there really is none. Has anyone in this group had or heard of a

case like this?

Thanks Barb

---------------------------------

Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. PC-to-Phone calls for ridiculously low rates.

March 29, 2006

You're probably right that LBD + other psychiatric issues would look

somewhat different than the those with just LBD.

Dealing with someone with LBD is not easy, dealing with someone with

LBD who you're having a difficult relationship with - must be near

impossible. I just hope you can find someone to help you in this

situation - before you burn yourself out.

Almost 10 years ago - my mother & I were at odds. Not talking.

Fighting, etc. Then my father passed away suddenly (fell asleep and

never woke up at 68). From that day on my mother worked hard to where

we are now in our relationship. We were lucky...

> >

> > Pardon me for asking but I am just about ready to jump off of

the

> side of a building because of my mother. I feel she has this

disorder

> but there seem to be no doctors out there that believe me,save on

who

> is no longer in the picture.

> >

> > My mothers course of events in this disease will not follow the

> rules. She has a history of psychiatric disorder with no,overt,

> events for years. Them in the last 4 years she has break downs

> (complete with hallucinations and raging psychotic features) and

> then SHE GETS WELL! and everybody thinks she is going to be just

> fine. Well after 5 events I know better. She is independent and

> intelligent.

> >

> > The last episode involved a trip to the psych ward an starting

on

> neuroleptic drugs. She got all of the terrible parkensonian side

> effects finally wound up in the hospital and finally in a nursing

> home. Then for the 4 th time she begged me for help and I came. I

had

> run to Alaska after 10 months of verbal and physical abuse from

her.

> I had a great job100,000 a year along with peace and quiet.

> >

> > She is now on the up swing and is driving and thinks that she

is

> just fine and now I am the enemy that is out to steal all of her

> money . There is more but what is the point.......

> > I am the only child. I am a nurse. I am 60 years old. I have

given

> up a home and all of my personal belongings. I have left three

great

> jobs to rescue her and and swore before the last break down that

I

> could not do this any more. She is mean and vicious with her

comments

> when she gets to this stage.

> >

> > As you can guess this is the tip of my miserable iceberg.

> >

> > I need help but there really is none. Has anyone in this group

had

> or heard of a case like this?

> >

> > Thanks Barb

> >

> > ---------------------------------

> > Yahoo! Messenger with Voice. PC-to-Phone calls for ridiculously

low

> rates.

> >

March 29, 2006

HI Barb,

Sounds like you have been through hell and high water. Does your mom

have Bi-polar disorder? What anti-psychotic is she taking?? Have her

docs tried seroquel?

I hope that you are able to get some support for yourself as well.

Courage

March 29, 2006

" Just remember every ones mother is not that loving and wonderful

sweet picture of momness that many of you have been blessed with. "

Thanks for saying that Barbara. My mother was also pretty evil, and my

dad stood back and let her hurt me 'cos he was afraid of her, and if

she was hurting me she was leaving him alone. Now she's dead and he's

just gone into nursing home and has LBD. There's an expectation /

assumption from all involved that we had wonderful relationship and

I've always been close to him etc. Truth is he barely spoke to me at

all whilst my mother was alive. It mostly feels that that's something

I should never say to anyone. Now he's ill it's like it all has to be

different. I act like I'm a loving daughter. I don't know if I love

him or not. He's my father, and I don't want him to suffer the fear

and pain and loneliness that I suffered as a child. It's ironic that

I'm so fiercely protective of him because he never protected me ...

but that's how it is, and I guess that's how it will be. I find more

healing through trying to give him the love he didn't know how to give

me. But I'm sure it's not that way for everyone .... and I doubt I'd

have been able to give the same to my mother.

March 29, 2006