Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

[Guest guest]

kassiane

if you put me and my cousin on top of the mattresses. it sould give you 450

lbs of presure. would that be enough? grin

eric

[Guest guest]

Sondra, you're so right about having our kids around others on the

spectrum. I had an eye opening moment not long ago concerning this.

Sky was in the middle of her third loop of Tomatis. I became

friendly with another mom there that had a girl around the same age

of Sky on the spectrum. Sky is a little bit higher functioning than

the other girl, but Sky tried everyday to play with her in the

waiting room while we waited for the therapists to come get the

girls. On the little girl's third day the therapists were telling us

what the girls did in therapy that day. They mentioned that Sky &

this girl played together quite a bit. The other mom was surprised &

asked if her daughter noticed Sky & if she looked her in the eye.

The therapist said yes & that they were sharing toys with one

another. This isn't unusual for Sky, but I knew it was something the

other mother had never seen her daughter do. I couldn't help but cry

when I saw the tears start to fall from the other Mother's eyes. Sky

was the first person to ever get this little girl to play. Me and

the other mom thought it was a huge break through. I now take both

my girls to a playgroup for preschool kids on the spectrum at least

once a month.

Wendie

> leighann much think it is of most important to always get the kids

to

> connect to the typical kids but in true sometimes I to think it is

more

> crucial for them to meet other kids on spectrum so they dont be to

feel so

> isolated inthe world but connect to others who can relate to how

they think

> and feel in life. But just like all peoples not all with ASD will

connect

> but when they do it is magical because they have a mutual bond of

> understanding at a depths others have no clue about. Kassiane to

express

> most of her friends are on spectrum. most ofmy internet connections

are with

> those on the spectrum although I to also connect to some degrees

tot he

> parents of children's with ASD. It is because I to understand the

way ASD

> relates to me and many others. Although the higher they are in

ability and

> functioning the more lost I to be to feel with them because they

teeter the

> NT world and ASD world so closely that it is hard to understand the

depths

> of thems thinkings.

> Sondra

[Guest guest]

I'm starting to think my Allie Kat has some Kassiane in her. For

months she wants " wa-booms " where Craig holds her up high and drops

her onto the bed while he says, " wa-BOOM! " . I also lay on her with

my robust self and she giggles and pulls me back when I get up.

Sometimes I'm afraid I'm gonna stop her heart from the pressure of

laying on her, lol, but she laughs like I'm tickling her.

Debi

> *grins* it isnt. But it would be such a cool peice of living room

> furniture...along with hanging chairs and a rocking couch...

> Kassiane who will have the STRANGEST decor when she grows up

>

> < Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

>

> Kassiane-thought you said the squeeze machine wasent tight enough?

>

> Pennie

> Abby's Mom

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Sondra, first of all, do not apoligize for making us worry about you.Thats

what we are here for. . Glad that things are a little better and the therapy

is working well.

Pennie

Abby's Mom

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 9/21/03 3:50:08 PM Eastern Daylight Time,

fightingautism@... writes:

> I'm starting to think my Allie Kat has some Kassiane in her. For

> months she wants " wa-booms " where Craig holds her up high and drops

> her onto the bed while he says, " wa-BOOM! " . I also lay on her with

> my robust self and she giggles and pulls me back when I get up.

>

abby will quickly try to get i my chair before i sit down so i sit on her.

then i say you took my chair and she laughs.

eric

[Guest guest]

My daughter has one NT best friend (and another NT friend, but

not " best " ) in homeschooling who so far accepts her as is, and really

enjoys her special qualities. Theresa's 9 yr old sister is also very

accepting and does not generally think of her as " disordered " though

has been very upset over the screaming and wants to know if Theresa

wiil be able to grow up like normal now.

I hope her best friend does not change with teen years, but she is 13

(not overly sophisticated or trendy, savvy etc due to homeschooling)

and is going to go to highschool next year, and then I think Theresa

will lose her.

I think I will be looking into the idea of meeting some " spectrum "

girls for Theresa. She never connects at our homeschool park days, so

I usually leave her home with her friend across the street on those

occasions, or seldom attend the parkdays. Theesa is very good with

smaller children, teaching them things and setting up imaginary play

games for them (which would disqualify her for Aspergers diagnosis?)

nancy grace

NT girls are not naturally

> going to take the risk to interact with others who are of different

but if

> given the chance to understand the differences and to enhance the

ability of

> the ASD child to the NT girls it can foster solid friendships that

no longer

> need a facilitator to assist int he process. As I to share rare to

have to

> intervene for the ASD child anymore as she is doing well and so are

the NT

> girls but at start of each new years have to do this for a time

until the NT

> girls are feeling okay with the ASD Childs differences.

> Sondra

[Guest guest]

plays alone because she has trouble asking kids to play with them, or

involving herself in the play. When she plays alone she watches the other

kids and gets depressed. The depression lasts several hours. Once home she

plays with neighborhood kids and the depression slowly lifts. And she is on

Zoloft, anti-depression medicine.

Who is teaching her how to approach children?

Who is teaching her how to play?

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[Guest guest]

Theresa is very good with

smaller children, teaching them things and setting up imaginary play

games for them (which would disqualify her for Aspergers diagnosis?)

Absolutely not, as this is common for Aspergers kids to connect well to

younger children's and also many with Aspergers have over exaggerated

imaginations that run wild in the thinkings much of day. I to know have 4 of

them.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

If I to ask Temple questions it would be of this?

You to be of to had nanny much of life did you to be to ever bond with you

birth mother ? or were you more bonded to the nanny?

You to be of considered a success due to you books and speakings but do you

FEEL as if you are of a success in you own personal life?

Also you to never speak of you siblings do you have connections to them now

and are you connected to them in a relationship ?

Do you have a best friend and if so what things do you be to do to establish

the relationship and maintain it so that it gives mutual meaning to you

both.

Do you to live independent of supports now as adult? Meaning do you care fro

you one self, bills, home care and such or do you to have hired assistants

to help you maneuver the life in which you live now.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

Pennie was it of you who to had a sick child? Is she of better this week?

Also I to think it was of you and you husband who posted of my husband and

wanted to say much thanks to that and hopefully he posted back to you as he

was so overwhelmed and not of sure of what I to be to doed or sayed to the

list so was much of cautious as he to lacked knowing what I to did. Anyways

I to thinked I to forgetted to thank you to that.

Also for those whoa re of interest I will be to speak in Toledo Ohio on the

18th of October at the ASO conference. It is titled through my eyes,

Sondra

[Guest guest]

pennie I to be of so much sorry to had made group of to worry with me. For

that I to be of much sorry. I to lacked knowing what to do as so much fear

was consuming me as never in life to had this to happen to me, nor to ever

be to fighted back. The husband was of proud of this part as he to say I to

not let them treat me badly and did be to say my thinkings back but then my

system to shut down rapidly from the fears. I to so much wanted to call

police but lacked knowing how since no words could be to come to me. The one

therapist to teached me that even if you to not say anything and dial 911

they will send police to you house. So now I to know.

My daughter and I and the husband are in a family counseling things now to

help her in teen things and us to understand what the issues to be with her

and family for her to be making some very wrong choices in life right now.

This week alone she is of best behaviors and following rules more so since I

to make her write them out as a contract things each time she goes with

friends. Not only that the therapist to asked us in first session how will

we as a whole know when therapy is done , my daughter to listened much so,

as she wants nothing more than to not have to go to the therapy things. LOL

but because she wants out so bad she is trying extra hard to do the things

we identified would be reason for not coming anymore. My teen son ins 14 1/2

and isn't any issues of things as teen yet, mild things yes but nothing of

things we have to fear of hims yet. Teens are of much hard. My husband to

shares he was of much wild teen and did much things he regrets with much of

life now. So he to know the things the children's are exploring with knowing

from exposure to it growing up but to me I to lack any of the knowings of

it. My parenting was of much easier when they were more into home and not

old enough to be of outside to play unsupervised. Life to be of much easier

then, as I to had more control of the things they explored. i to knowed them

better than I to know them now. So for me am struggling in all this and much

can be to tell me this if common for teens and or this is typical teen

issues I to lack the ability to grasp it because have no visuals for me to

base this on.

Anyways I to be of rambling and just be to wanted to say much thanks to the

peoples for to help me when I to be of had this crisis and to say I to be of

sorry to had caused so much worry in that.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

We can help approach other children every day, and yet withing minutes

she is reluctant to act. When we go to playgroup, I take 10 1/2 years

old, over to the other kids, have everyone introduce themselves, like we do

every time, and yet after the introductions walks to a side and sits.

Waiting for someone to approach her and play.

As for teaching her to play, well still has no imagination. She can't

even have a tea party with her 2 younger sisters. She does play very well

with her 2 sisters, one is 9yrs old and one is 3 yrs old. But her sisters

know they have to invite her, basically forcing her to come and play.

is reluctant , resisting at first but within minutes is laughing and having

so much fun she continues to play, on her own accord.

>From: gprobertson@...

>Reply-To: Autism_in_Girls

>To: Autism_in_Girls

>Subject: RE: questions for Temple Grandin

>Date: Sun, 21 Sep 2003 16:52:02 -0400

>

> plays alone because she has trouble asking kids to play with them, or

>involving herself in the play. When she plays alone she watches the other

>kids and gets depressed. The depression lasts several hours. Once home she

>plays with neighborhood kids and the depression slowly lifts. And she is on

>Zoloft, anti-depression medicine.

>

>Who is teaching her how to approach children?

>Who is teaching her how to play?

>

>__________________________________________________________________

>McAfee VirusScan Online from the Netscape Network.

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[Guest guest]

Pennie thanks I to be to trying hard to be of better and not feel guilt for

to be to caused so much worry , I to not like to cause peoples sad.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

I dont like the side to side from the squeeze machine. I also like

things that conform to my body, I have a cloth pillow made with corn

that I like, but it isn't heavy enough usually. I also like my wrist and

ankle weights, and I really like it when my cousin pretends to be a

weighted blanket and lays on my back (I have a friend who does this

better than he does, but said cousin does a pretty good job and I see

him way more often).

I like weight EVERYWHERE, usually...but I dont like the stiff blankets

either.

Kassiane

< Re: RE: Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

kassiane I to didnot care for the squeeze machine because it does not

squeeze me in ways my body needs. Mattresses to me do not work as it is

too

smothering. I to need weighted things that are 3/4 filled but that

actually

mold to you body and then give the weights to where it is needed for me

such

as my husband had a buckwheat pillow that is heavy but not as heavy as I

to

like for it to be but it conforms to my body and molds to me so it is of

most calming effect I can be to establish. Weighted blankets are too

stiff

they do not mold to you. I to not like any weights things past my knees

but

prefer most to be on upper body of arms chest and such.

Sondra

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[Guest guest]

Playaway toys has an adult hammock swing. I took it over for about an

hour at my first ASA conference, because I was a sensory mess (at my 1st

MAAP conference I took over their spinning platform swing). It's one of

the ones that hangs in the doorway.

Kassiane

< Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

kassiane that is of me too I to be have been wanting those patio swings

that

looks like couch for me in my living room but the husband to say no. I

to

also be to want the swinging chair but we do not own the place we to

live in

so to adapt the ceiling to put the chair up is a no too. I to not like

to

spin but gentle swings are of great comfort to me such as the two I to

just

shared. Even if one could make an adult netted swing I would be of

interest

to it since is can give firm hold while you swing.

Yet for me would much prefer whirl pool or swimming pool with direct sun

light to keep my body of warm, if I to be of slight chill will be of

much

irritable.

Sondra

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[Guest guest]

I want a " wa-boom " ! But I am waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too big!

Sounds like your Allie has discovered that dp IS bliss.

Kassiane

< Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

>

> Kassiane-thought you said the squeeze machine wasent tight enough?

>

> Pennie

> Abby's Mom

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Ummm nope! But it'd be a nice attempt.

At ASA 2002 I was under a mattress with FOUR people on it, a total of

over 600 pounds.

Kassiane

< Re: RE: Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

kassiane

if you put me and my cousin on top of the mattresses. it sould give you

450

lbs of presure. would that be enough? grin

eric

[Guest guest]

kassiane you need to be of careful that you do not be to over do this and

get squished for the real of it. it could be of dangerous with you to be of

so thin.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

As a child i did not play imaginative games. they seemed incredibly boring to

me. i would set games up, eg arrange a " shop " but then i would go and read in

my room while the others played. i did play imaginative with my children so

that they would know what was going on when other children came to play. there

are other games that she can learn, like chases and hide and seek. she could

learn hopscotch, ball games if ball things are not too stressful. another thing

that a lot of children like is to dance to cds. she could also do things like

swimming lessons or horse riding, which are social skills as well as sports

skills. she can interact with others on her terms and be happy, rather than

doing an pretence at play, which is really only to please adults.

Message: 4

Date: Sun, 21 Sep 2003 18:09:40 -0600

Subject: Re: RE: questions for Temple Grandin

We can help approach other children every day, and yet withing minutes

she is reluctant to act. When we go to playgroup, I take 10 1/2 years

old, over to the other kids, have everyone introduce themselves, like we do

every time, and yet after the introductions walks to a side and sits.

Waiting for someone to approach her and play.

As for teaching her to play, well still has no imagination. She can't

even have a tea party with her 2 younger sisters. She does play very well

with her 2 sisters, one is 9yrs old and one is 3 yrs old. But her sisters

know they have to invite her, basically forcing her to come and play.

is reluctant , resisting at first but within minutes is laughing and having

so much fun she continues to play, on her own accord.

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